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(NYPost)   "Hey let's go backpacking in Afghanistan. What could possibly go wrong?" Five years later...   ( nypost.com) divider line
    More: Followup, United States, Canadian Joshua Boyle, Taliban, national security official, War in Afghanistan, Canadian husband, Caitlan Coleman, Haqqani network  
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6084 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Oct 2017 at 10:50 AM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-10-12 09:08:02 AM  
The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?
 
2017-10-12 09:19:34 AM  

abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?


Well she was pregnant with the first one when captured.

But continuing to procreate while in captivity?  WTF.

The couple set off in the summer 2012 for a journey that took them to Russia, the central Asian countries of Kazakhstan, Tajikistan and Kyrgyzstan, and then to Afghanistan. Coleman's parents last heard from their son-in-law on Oct. 8, 2012, from an internet cafe in what Boyle described as an "unsafe" part of Afghanistan.
...

The family was being held by the Haqqani network. U.S. officials call the group a terrorist organization and have targeted its leaders with drone strikes. But the group also operates like a criminal network. Unlike the Islamic State group, it does not typically execute Western hostages, preferring to ransom them for cash.

So they got captured by the good terrorists vs the bad terrorists.  I guess we now know that stupidity isn't 100% terminal.
 
2017-10-12 09:23:27 AM  
Did they forget to sew a Canadian Flag patch on their backpacks?
 
2017-10-12 09:29:37 AM  
Typical Americans.  They think it is a good idea to go on a constitutional through a politically volitile region without a second thought of something going wrong and then BAM!  5 years of captivity and 3 kids later.  It almost sounds like they were a zoo exhibit.
 
2017-10-12 09:31:13 AM  

redoctober65: Did they forget to sew a Canadian Flag patch on their backpacks?


Canuckistan does very little for their citizens once they step foot out of the country - especially dumb-f**k hikers who waltz into known war-torn terrorist sh*t-holes like Afghanistan.
 
2017-10-12 09:36:11 AM  

harleyquinnical: Typical NORTH Americans...

 
2017-10-12 09:48:04 AM  

flucto: harleyquinnical: Typical NORTH Americans...


LCD Soundsystem - North American Scum
Youtube gJ2np7R-Uwg
 
2017-10-12 09:55:20 AM  

harleyquinnical: Typical Americans.  They think it is a good idea to go on a constitutional through a politically volitile region without a second thought of something going wrong and then BAM!  5 years of captivity and 3 kids later.  It almost sounds like they were a zoo exhibit.


Something unconstitutional about this.
 
2017-10-12 10:14:09 AM  
"Hey honey, I was thinking...maybe we could, you know, spice up our sex lives a bit?"

"Ok, I think we could do that. What did you have in mind".

"Well, I've always had this fantasy about being captured by terrorists and held against our will in a camp in Pakistan and while we're there, we just f*ck like rabbits and have a couple of children".

"....I'll get the plane tickets".
 
2017-10-12 10:24:18 AM  
Wow. Idiots.
 
2017-10-12 10:31:18 AM  

abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?


He was allowed to rock her Casbah.
 
2017-10-12 10:45:48 AM  
"Now that we're freed, how about a nice relaxing trip to North Korea?"
 
2017-10-12 10:48:43 AM  

harleyquinnical: Typical Americans.  They think it is a good idea to go on a constitutional through a politically volitile region without a second thought of something going wrong and then BAM!  5 years of captivity and 3 kids later.  It almost sounds like they were a zoo exhibit.


A friend of mine is leaving for Afghanistan in a week.  I asked him how he plans to avoid getting kidnapped and he told me he'll be traveling with a security detail, and he grew a beard.

I tried to drive the point home by insisting that he let me review his will to make sure it is up to date.  Now I'm thinking I need to write him a heartfelt note to put a fine point on my concerns. It won't dissuade him from going, but at least it might give him some pause before venturing recklessly into dangerous areas, and give me a clear conscience that I tried.
 
2017-10-12 10:51:01 AM  
Couple of farking numbskulls.
 
2017-10-12 10:52:22 AM  

abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?


It's called the Amsterdam syndrome
 
2017-10-12 10:54:30 AM  
Pakistan...Afghanistan...same thing, right?
 
2017-10-12 10:55:59 AM  

abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?


Getting held in captivity was somebody's fetish, apparently.
 
2017-10-12 10:56:06 AM  

harleyquinnical: Typical Americans.  They think it is a good idea to go on a constitutional through a politically volitile region without a second thought of something going wrong and then BAM!  5 years of captivity and 3 kids later.  It almost sounds like they were a zoo exhibit.


People from other countries do this far often than Americans.
 
2017-10-12 10:56:56 AM  

redoctober65: Did they forget to sew a Canadian Flag patch on their backpacks?


I see what you did, there.
 
IP [TotalFark]
2017-10-12 10:57:25 AM  

dv-ous: Wow. Idiots.

 
2017-10-12 10:57:46 AM  
Dammit, Darwin, you had ONE job!

/this kind of stupidity should not be breeding
 
2017-10-12 10:59:07 AM  

abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?


That will make for an interesting Maury Povich paternity testing episode.

Abdullah, you are the dad of the second child!  Amir you are the dad of the third child!
 
2017-10-12 10:59:36 AM  

litespeed74: abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?

It's called the Amsterdam syndrome


img.fark.netView Full Size


img.fark.netView Full Size



/understood the reference
 
2017-10-12 10:59:44 AM  
"Hon, how are pregnant if we didn't have se... Oh."

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-12 11:00:39 AM  
The couple set off in the summer 2012 for a journey that took them to Russia, the central Asian countries of Kazakhstan, Tajikistan and Kyrgyzstan, and then to Afghanistan. Coleman's parents last heard from their son-in-law on Oct. 8, 2012, from an internet cafe in what Boyle described as an "unsafe" part of Afghanistan.

... yeah, they're spies.
 
2017-10-12 11:01:14 AM  
Well, it wasn't all bad.  At least the Taliban put them on a diet.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-12 11:02:38 AM  
Apparently they gave them back because the world respects America again:

White House press secretary Sarah Sanders told reporters Thursday that the successful recovery of the family was what was being referenced Wednesday when Trump told a crowd in Pennsylvania that "something happened today where a country that totally disrespected us called with some very, very important news."

Trump did not disclose what country or any details involved but said "one of my generals came in and they said, you know, I have to tell you, a year ago they would have never done that."
"This is a country that did not respect us, this is a country that respects us now. The world is starting to respect us again, believe me," Trump said appearing to reference Pakistan and that country's role in bringing about the the recovery of the four hostages.
 
2017-10-12 11:04:55 AM  

Theaetetus: The couple set off in the summer 2012 for a journey that took them to Russia, the central Asian countries of Kazakhstan, Tajikistan and Kyrgyzstan, and then to Afghanistan.


Jesus Christ, what kind of retard travel agent booked that vacation?

img.fark.netView Full Size


Oh.
 
2017-10-12 11:05:45 AM  
Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.
 
2017-10-12 11:06:35 AM  
I hear they've optioned their story to Showtime for a new series.
 
2017-10-12 11:06:37 AM  
Captain Parmenter, Sergeant O'Rourke and Corporal Agarn led the rescue effort from nearby F Troop in Helmand Province.
 
2017-10-12 11:06:46 AM  

dukeblue219: Apparently they gave them back because the world respects America again:


Probably gave them back because they were tired of their constant farking and all the kids running around. I bet it was a Ransom of Red Chief sort of situation, and master deal-maker Trumperdidoo actually got THEM to pay us to take 'em off their hands.
 
2017-10-12 11:08:27 AM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Theaetetus: The couple set off in the summer 2012 for a journey that took them to Russia, the central Asian countries of Kazakhstan, Tajikistan and Kyrgyzstan, and then to Afghanistan.

Jesus Christ, what kind of retard travel agent booked that vacation?


The Ace Tomato Company.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-12 11:08:29 AM  

Peter_B_Risen: Well, it wasn't all bad.  At least the Taliban put them on a diet.

[img.fark.net image 850x477]


Wow.

They were still having sex, looking like that?

*shudder*

/I got upset at the very idea of having children in this situation, admittedly there are probably details I'm not privvy to
 
2017-10-12 11:09:24 AM  
What a bunch of damn retards.  Shame their kids are likely going to be as dumb as their parents.
 
2017-10-12 11:09:35 AM  

Bedstead Polisher: Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.


Perhaps it was an attempted to humanize themselves to their captors - figuring they wouldn't kill them if they had small children to take care of.

It's also likely there's not a whole lot to do in a cave somewhere in the desert, and the Taliban probably isn't big on birth control.
 
2017-10-12 11:10:58 AM  

abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?


It doesn't say they're his children.
 
2017-10-12 11:12:11 AM  

TuteTibiImperes: Bedstead Polisher: Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.

Perhaps it was an attempted to humanize themselves to their captors - figuring they wouldn't kill them if they had small children to take care of.

It's also likely there's not a whole lot to do in a cave somewhere in the desert, and the Taliban probably isn't big on birth control.


We're assuming the husband is the dad of the kids born in captivity.
 
2017-10-12 11:14:29 AM  

Bedstead Polisher: Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.


It is possible to experience the pleasures of sex and not impregnant the female.

Kissy face and intercourse

Bah Humbug

Maybe a little intercourse for a little while
 
2017-10-12 11:14:37 AM  

big pig peaches: abhorrent1: The couple had three children while in captivity.

Um. WTF?

It doesn't say they're his children.


The article does say the children are of the couple, implying that they're his kids.  Of course, it's possible she was raped by her captors and they're just choosing to claim the kids as their own so that they don't grow up thinking they're the product of terrorist rape.
 
2017-10-12 11:15:34 AM  

TuteTibiImperes: Bedstead Polisher: Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.

Perhaps it was an attempted to humanize themselves to their captors - figuring they wouldn't kill them if they had small children to take care of.

It's also likely there's not a whole lot to do in a cave somewhere in the desert, and the Taliban probably isn't big on birth control.


She was pregnant when she was captured and she ended up getting pregnant two more times. Assuming that he's the father, they were then held in the same cell and I'm sure they probably didn't think too hard about family planning. There's always a baby boom during times of war, I'm sure it was probably a similar mindset for them. They're alone, they're scared, they wanted carnal comfort.
 
2017-10-12 11:16:06 AM  
I hear Angola is nice this time of year.
 
2017-10-12 11:17:03 AM  
They were allowed to breed in captivity so as to spread their seed back in the homeland.
Taliban knows a win-win when they see it...
 
2017-10-12 11:17:20 AM  
You are seriously the only Americans going through the area that are not wearing Camouflage and armed... what the hell did you expect.
 
2017-10-12 11:17:59 AM  

inclemency: Peter_B_Risen: Well, it wasn't all bad.  At least the Taliban put them on a diet.

[img.fark.net image 850x477]

Wow.

They were still having sex, looking like that?

*shudder*

/I got upset at the very idea of having children in this situation, admittedly there are probably details I'm not privvy to


More kids. More annoyance. More chance of being told to 'fark off and get back to your own country'.
 
2017-10-12 11:18:14 AM  
Are we sure the other 2 kids are the husbands?
 
2017-10-12 11:18:46 AM  
So you have to go get captured by the taliban in order to get it on with the wife?

Thats a very specific fetish.  & some next-level S&M.. but okay, whatever you gotta do i guess.
 
2017-10-12 11:18:57 AM  

zepillin: Bedstead Polisher: Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.

It is possible to experience the pleasures of sex and not impregnant the female.

Kissy face and intercourse

Bah Humbug

Maybe a little intercourse for a little while


My first sentence was a sarcastic response to other comments in this thread. I'm sure they didn't plan to have more kids (maybe they did) but even the most careful birth control methods fail on occasion.
 
2017-10-12 11:20:33 AM  
"Wow honey, it sure is nice to get back to civilization, and catch up with.....WHO DID YOU SAY THE farkING PRESIDENT IS!"
 
2017-10-12 11:21:54 AM  

Bedstead Polisher: TuteTibiImperes: Bedstead Polisher: Why didn't this married couple abstain from sex for 5 years? So irresponsible!

They also lost a bunch of weight but don't look emaciated, kids look well taken care of too.

Perhaps it was an attempted to humanize themselves to their captors - figuring they wouldn't kill them if they had small children to take care of.

It's also likely there's not a whole lot to do in a cave somewhere in the desert, and the Taliban probably isn't big on birth control.

She was pregnant when she was captured and she ended up getting pregnant two more times. Assuming that he's the father, they were then held in the same cell and I'm sure they probably didn't think too hard about family planning. There's always a baby boom during times of war, I'm sure it was probably a similar mindset for them. They're alone, they're scared, they wanted carnal comfort.


I would say going hiking while pregnant in literally the most hostile place in the world toward's Americans and women, that these people are not the best decision makers in the world.  My parents reaction would be "WTF were you thinking?"  They would have bakered acted me, tazed me, had me kidnapped before that trip was made.

I grew up between the US and Colombia.  I spent a lot of time in New Orleans, where I am from, and thought I knew mean streets.  Fast forward to getting shipped off to Colombia in 1988.  The most mean streets in the US looked like Sesame Street compared to a middle class neighborhood in Medellin in those days.

I developed a hyper sense of situational awareness coupled with the advice from my Colombian grandmother "If people from Colombia do not go to certain parts of town or their own country, your ass should not go there either."
 
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