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(MSN)   We tried the new grocery store frozen avocados so you didn't have to...and you should be thanking us for this every day for the rest of your life. The horror, THE HORROR   ( msn.com) divider line
    More: Fail, avocado, Lemon, Vitamin C, Citrus, Acid, Savory Avocado Recipes, Slightly frozen avocado, avocados  
•       •       •

6686 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Oct 2017 at 10:50 AM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2017-10-06 11:52:21 AM  
11 votes:

demaL-demaL-yeH: bainsguy: Eddie Adams from Torrance: When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!

you can just leave the pit in, too. it also works if you drop the pit into your bowl/tupperware/whatever of guac until it's time to use it.

And if you put saran wrap directly on the surface, since oxidation is what makes it brown and nasty.


I prefer to leave it out, but pump the room full of argon gas to displace all the oxygen.

Also helps to prevent others in the room from eating up all your guac.
2017-10-06 02:02:58 PM  
8 votes:
img.fark.net
2017-10-06 10:29:47 AM  
8 votes:

Dr.Fey: There is never a need for frozen avocados; they are available year round (at least in the U.S.) from countries south and more equator-ly positioned.


My grocery store carries them year round.  And a couple of times a year, they actually sell ripe ones that you can eat.
2017-10-06 10:03:53 AM  
6 votes:
Ah, avocados. When ripe, they're the perfect topper for toast...

Right. I see where this is going.
2017-10-06 11:22:38 AM  
5 votes:

weiserfireman: They can pick what they need for their orders, and leave the rest hanging on the tree.


Must be in an area with no squirrels.  I have an avocado tree, and the little bastards knock down almost all of them before they can grow to full size.

/am otherwise okay with squirrels.
//was not trying to insult their parents.
///I'm sure they all come from proper marriages.
2017-10-06 04:10:21 PM  
4 votes:
fitbottomedeats.com
2017-10-06 12:35:08 PM  
4 votes:

RJReves: demaL-demaL-yeH: hlehmann: bainsguy: Eddie Adams from Torrance: When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!

you can just leave the pit in, too. it also works if you drop the pit into your bowl/tupperware/whatever of guac until it's time to use it.

Leaving the pit in the bowl of guacamole only protects the spot where the pit lies, because it seals it from oxygen.  You can put a billiard ball or a light bulb in the guacamole and get the same results.  To protect the rest of the bowl you need to seal it from oxygen (plastic wrap pressed down against the surface of the guacamole, or add some type of browning inhibitor.  When I make a batch I usually add a smashed up vitamin C tablet; it stops the browning without making it taste too limey.

Too limey?

The prefer to be called Imperialist British Swine.


I'm watching you.
2017-10-06 12:17:22 PM  
4 votes:

OOF: [img.fark.net image 320x240]


That's the bastard.  Right there.  Must have ruined about 100 avocados for me this season.
2017-10-06 12:11:40 PM  
4 votes:

demaL-demaL-yeH: hlehmann: bainsguy: Eddie Adams from Torrance: When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!

you can just leave the pit in, too. it also works if you drop the pit into your bowl/tupperware/whatever of guac until it's time to use it.

Leaving the pit in the bowl of guacamole only protects the spot where the pit lies, because it seals it from oxygen.  You can put a billiard ball or a light bulb in the guacamole and get the same results.  To protect the rest of the bowl you need to seal it from oxygen (plastic wrap pressed down against the surface of the guacamole, or add some type of browning inhibitor.  When I make a batch I usually add a smashed up vitamin C tablet; it stops the browning without making it taste too limey.

Too limey?


The prefer to be called Imperialist British Swine.
2017-10-06 11:26:48 AM  
4 votes:
Here is where I decided I disliked the author:

As an avocado aficionado (and, ahem, brunch-going millennial), I decided to put this claim to the test. A taste test, that is. I nabbed a pouch from the store and gave it a try. Here's what you need to know.

Also, she didn't know what citric or ascorbic acid was? Brunch-going millennial please!
2017-10-06 11:06:11 AM  
4 votes:

loonatic112358: sounds like it might be useful for making shiatty NYC recipes for guacamole


New York City?
That really chaps my hide!
2017-10-06 11:03:38 AM  
4 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: It takes 10 seconds to split, pit, and scoop an avocado.


...but you could be using those 10 seconds to post on InstaTwit about how your lifehack saved you so much time you can finally get a second job to afford to live in SoHo.
2017-10-06 10:56:07 AM  
4 votes:
Why would I buy a frozen version of Satan's Ass Spackle which I assume tastes like Avocados do.
OOF
2017-10-06 12:13:11 PM  
3 votes:
img.fark.net
2017-10-06 11:46:10 AM  
3 votes:

RJReves: loonatic112358: sounds like it might be useful for making shiatty NYC recipes for guacamole

New York City?
That really chaps my hide!


Pace Picante Commercial (1994)
Youtube ooPBXfnIpYI
2017-10-06 11:16:12 AM  
3 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: It takes 10 seconds to split, pit, and scoop an avocado.


You forgot the week before you have to wait for them to ripen after buying them at the store.

/a week and 5 minutes if you prefer a stringy brown mess
2017-10-06 11:05:31 AM  
3 votes:

Opacity: AverageAmericanGuy: It takes 10 seconds to split, pit, and scoop an avocado.

...but you could be using those 10 seconds to post on InstaTwit about how your lifehack saved you so much time you can finally get a second job to afford to live in SoHo.


I live stream the process on Periscope.
2017-10-06 03:29:19 PM  
2 votes:

RJReves: Lady J: RJReves: demaL-demaL-yeH: hlehmann: bainsguy: Eddie Adams from Torrance: When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!

you can just leave the pit in, too. it also works if you drop the pit into your bowl/tupperware/whatever of guac until it's time to use it.

Leaving the pit in the bowl of guacamole only protects the spot where the pit lies, because it seals it from oxygen.  You can put a billiard ball or a light bulb in the guacamole and get the same results.  To protect the rest of the bowl you need to seal it from oxygen (plastic wrap pressed down against the surface of the guacamole, or add some type of browning inhibitor.  When I make a batch I usually add a smashed up vitamin C tablet; it stops the browning without making it taste too limey.

Too limey?

The prefer to be called Imperialist British Swine.

I'm watching you.

Should I wiggle my butt?


img.fark.net
2017-10-06 11:39:30 AM  
2 votes:

Robo Beat: Avocadoes can be frustrating.  You get like a 15-minute-long window of deliciousness between "inedible green rock" and "nasty brown gunk."


I can store them for up to a week in the "window of ripeness". What part of "put them in the 'fridge when they are ready" is incomprehensible? (hint: it works for other fruit too)

Dr.Fey: weiserfireman: They can pick what they need for their orders, and leave the rest hanging on the tree.

Must be in an area with no squirrels.  I have an avocado tree, and the little bastards knock down almost all of them before they can grow to full size.

/am otherwise okay with squirrels.
//was not trying to insult their parents.
///I'm sure they all come from proper marriages.


Must be SoCal... It gets just a little too cold here for them to survive. I'm jealous...

red5ish: Also, she didn't know what citric or ascorbic acid was? Brunch-going millennial please!


*coughed up coffee*
*sneezed*
*scared cat*
*wiped off the desk*
2017-10-06 11:10:57 AM  
2 votes:

Percise1: The bumpy-skinned fruit has seen a surge in popularity over the past decade.

Really? Did hipster douches figure out what they were, or something?
I've been eating them year round since the 1970s. WTF is new about avocados?

The packaging promised perfectly ripe avocados-something that's certainly a feat to find fresh-that are hand-cut. Ordinarily, fresh avocados have a small window for ripeness. Wait a day too long, and the firm green flesh turns a mushy brown.

Feat to find fresh? Small window for ripeness? What is wrong with this person?
I'd hate so see what happens if this moran came up against something challenging, like peeling a banana...


Probably brags about having discovered that EVERYONE PEELS BANANAS WRONG!
2017-10-06 11:07:30 AM  
2 votes:

WyDave: Marcus Aurelius: Dr.Fey: There is never a need for frozen avocados; they are available year round (at least in the U.S.) from countries south and more equator-ly positioned.

My grocery store carries them year round.  And a couple of times a year, they actually sell ripe ones that you can eat.

We've given up on making our own guacamole.  Simply CANNOT get avocados that taste like anything other than green wallpaper paste.  I hate to admit it, but Holy Guacamole is a best way for us to get something remotely edible.


Speaking of wallpaper paste

www.unloathe.com
2017-10-06 10:20:48 AM  
2 votes:
When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!
2017-10-06 05:11:14 PM  
1 vote:

CoysOdie: [img.fark.net image 337x450]


Even worse, the bathroom in my 70s-built childhood home had avocado fixtures. And pink and gold wallpaper.
c8.alamy.comThis isn't far off.
2017-10-06 12:39:35 PM  
1 vote:

Lady J: RJReves: demaL-demaL-yeH: hlehmann: bainsguy: Eddie Adams from Torrance: When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!

you can just leave the pit in, too. it also works if you drop the pit into your bowl/tupperware/whatever of guac until it's time to use it.

Leaving the pit in the bowl of guacamole only protects the spot where the pit lies, because it seals it from oxygen.  You can put a billiard ball or a light bulb in the guacamole and get the same results.  To protect the rest of the bowl you need to seal it from oxygen (plastic wrap pressed down against the surface of the guacamole, or add some type of browning inhibitor.  When I make a batch I usually add a smashed up vitamin C tablet; it stops the browning without making it taste too limey.

Too limey?

The prefer to be called Imperialist British Swine.

I'm watching you.


Should I wiggle my butt?
2017-10-06 12:19:43 PM  
1 vote:
Chemical-like ingredients always prompt a good Google session.

Here's the breakdown. Citric acid is the acid that occurs naturally in citrus fruits like lemons or limes. It's often used as a preservative or to add a sour taste to sodas and food. And ascorbic acid? It's another name for vitamin C.


/I feel smarter every day
//at this rate I'll be considered borderline genius by 2020
2017-10-06 12:10:30 PM  
1 vote:

Mr.Poops: *Pro-tip: If you have a Mexican grocery store, they typically stock avocados at half the price or even cheaper than any other grocery store I've been to. I can get three for a dollar at the one near me.


Shush!!!  Don't ruin it for us.

Love my local Mexican grocery.  I can load the cart UP with produce for under $15.
2017-10-06 12:03:14 PM  
1 vote:

hlehmann: bainsguy: Eddie Adams from Torrance: When we had an avocado tree, we used to freeze them once in a while. They'd generally turn to mush, but they were OK for guac or avocado sauce.

The Taste of Home Test Kitchen taught me an easy trick to help keep avocados green: Squeeze lemon (or lime!) juice onto the flesh of the avocado before refrigerating

What sort of wizardry is this?

/lime!

you can just leave the pit in, too. it also works if you drop the pit into your bowl/tupperware/whatever of guac until it's time to use it.

Leaving the pit in the bowl of guacamole only protects the spot where the pit lies, because it seals it from oxygen.  You can put a billiard ball or a light bulb in the guacamole and get the same results.  To protect the rest of the bowl you need to seal it from oxygen (plastic wrap pressed down against the surface of the guacamole, or add some type of browning inhibitor.  When I make a batch I usually add a smashed up vitamin C tablet; it stops the browning without making it taste too limey.


Too limey?
2017-10-06 11:53:59 AM  
1 vote:

Vaginosilicosis: Schmerd1948: Kinda what I was thinking. "Hey, guys...citric acid comes from citric fruit! Who knew?".

From Wikipedia:
In 1917, American food chemist James Currie discovered certain strains of the mold Aspergillus niger could be efficient citric acid producers, and the pharmaceutical company Pfizer began industrial-level production using this technique two years later, followed by Citrique Belge in 1929. In this production technique, which is still the major industrial route to citric acid used today, cultures of A. nigerare fed on a sucrose or glucose-containing medium to produce citric acid. The source of sugar is corn steep liquor, molasses, hydrolyzed corn starch or other inexpensive sugary solutions.[10] After the mold is filtered out of the resulting solution, citric acid is isolated by precipitating it with calcium hydroxide to yield calcium citrate salt, from which citric acid is regenerated by treatment with sulfuric acid, as in the direct extraction from citrus fruit juice.
In 1977, a patent was granted to Lever Brothers for the chemical synthesis of citric acid starting either from aconitic or isocitrate/alloisocitrate calcium salts under high pressure conditions. This produced citric acid in near quantitative conversion under what appeared to be a reverse non-enzymatic Krebs cycle reaction.[11]
In 2007, worldwide annual production stood at approximately 1,600,000 tons.[12] More than 50% of this volume was produced in China. More than 50% was used as acidity regulator in beverages, some 20% in other food applications, 20% for detergent applications and 10% for related applications other than food, such as cosmetics, pharmaceutics and in the chemical industry.


Yum.
2017-10-06 11:49:37 AM  
1 vote:

robodog: Schmerd1948: red5ish: Here is where I decided I disliked the author:

As an avocado aficionado (and, ahem, brunch-going millennial), I decided to put this claim to the test. A taste test, that is. I nabbed a pouch from the store and gave it a try. Here's what you need to know.

Also, she didn't know what citric or ascorbic acid was? Brunch-going millennial please!

Kinda what I was thinking. "Hey, guys...citric acid comes from citric fruit! Who knew?".
Lime juice on the flesh, then Saran Wrap. None of this is hard.

Forget Saran Wrap, use a vacuum sealer, that and the acid means guac now lasts days in my 34 degree fridge instead of hours.


Uh, I dint have a vacuum sealer. I'm very sorry.
(Sob)
2017-10-06 11:48:01 AM  
1 vote:

Smelly Pirate Hooker: Those vacuum-sealed ones in the refrigerator/deli section also suck. Big time. YMMV but I found them tasteless.

And avocados have a taste. Delicious, delicious taste.


The taste is subtle, and that's why the stupids don't like them.
2017-10-06 11:41:33 AM  
1 vote:

Mr.Poops: *Pro-tip: If you have a Mexican grocery store, they typically stock avocados at half the price or even cheaper than any other grocery store I've been to. I can get three for a dollar at the one near me.


And while you are there, get some superior tortillas, and ask mamasita if she does tamales.
2017-10-06 11:36:21 AM  
1 vote:

red5ish: Also, she didn't know what citric or ascorbic acid was? Brunch-going millennial please!


Worse, when she looked it up she actually believed it was derived from citrus fruit.   When you find it as an ingredient in food like that its nearly 100% of the time derived from a factory using corn syrup fed mold, likely from China, which sounds a lot less cuddly and foodie than lime juice.
2017-10-06 11:22:27 AM  
1 vote:
Avocadoes can be frustrating.  You get like a 15-minute-long window of deliciousness between "inedible green rock" and "nasty brown gunk."
2017-10-06 11:07:16 AM  
1 vote:
The bumpy-skinned fruit has seen a surge in popularity over the past decade.

Really? Did hipster douches figure out what they were, or something?
I've been eating them year round since the 1970s. WTF is new about avocados?

The packaging promised perfectly ripe avocados-something that's certainly a feat to find fresh-that are hand-cut. Ordinarily, fresh avocados have a small window for ripeness. Wait a day too long, and the firm green flesh turns a mushy brown.

Feat to find fresh? Small window for ripeness? What is wrong with this person?
I'd hate so see what happens if this moran came up against something challenging, like peeling a banana...
2017-10-06 09:17:48 AM  
1 vote:
You didn't have to try them.  I could have told you that would have tasted like shiat.
 
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