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(Politico)   John Kelly finds out why his phone is acting weird   ( politico.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, President of the United States, White House, staff John Kelly, Mobile phone, President Donald Trump, Donald Trump, White House chief, personal cell phone  
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10681 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Oct 2017 at 4:55 AM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



89 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2017-10-06 02:29:38 AM  
I'm glad that my phone is totally unhacked.

Россия потрясающая.  путин - человек
Posted from my Lenovo Laptop
 
2017-10-06 02:33:23 AM  
And he's supposed to be one of the "adults". We are so boned.
 
2017-10-06 03:47:35 AM  
They're leaking unflattering stuff about Kelly? Friday news dump here we come.
 
2017-10-06 04:56:54 AM  
The Fappening 3: The West Wing Edition.
 
2017-10-06 05:00:36 AM  
As I have said elsewhere on the intarwebs, the rest of the world is either laughing at us or shaking their heads at us. All of us, every US citizen. I live overseas now, and I have personal experience to show for this.
 
2017-10-06 05:03:04 AM  

Tanqueray: They're leaking unflattering stuff about Kelly? Friday news dump here we come.


But his emails. He's gone.
 
2017-10-06 05:06:18 AM  
Why are personal phones allowed near anything classified? We weren't allowed to take them into the datacentre I used to work in.
 
2017-10-06 05:10:00 AM  
Attached is important info about President Trump, just click on the attachment called thisisnotahackbutcompromisingintel.exe.zip
 
2017-10-06 05:13:36 AM  
How farking incompetent are these chucklekfarks???

"Hey I'm a big Mr Somebody with a big job in a big country with lots of big enemies, my primary source of communication with my other Mr Somebodies has been acting really really strange lately, must be nothing important"

Seriously??? What was the farking holdup? He still had a year on his contract before he could upgrade???

Every time, E V E R Y god damn time I say to  my self "you know BBQ, these clowns can't possibly have any more chuckles left in their bag" I'm proven wrong.
 
2017-10-06 05:13:53 AM  

irvingsmiley: As I have said elsewhere on the intarwebs, the rest of the world is either laughing at us or shaking their heads at us. All of us, every US citizen. I live overseas now, and I have personal experience to show for this.


This is too true. It also gets tedious having to answer questions about this idiot's behavior on a weekly basis.

Safe to say the Japanese are solidly in the "Fark this guy camp." It's easy to see why.
 
2017-10-06 05:14:56 AM  
An administration that can't even enact routine IT security.
 
2017-10-06 05:16:58 AM  

irvingsmiley: As I have said elsewhere on the intarwebs, the rest of the world is either laughing at us or shaking their heads at us. All of us, every US citizen. I live overseas now, and I have personal experience to show for this.


I'm a foreigner. All 7.2 billion of us got together behind your backs and we pretty much all agree you guys are crazy.

Seriously, Trump doesn't command a lot of respect. He doesn't respect any previous deals and doesn't get that you can't shake up the international order like an etch-a-sketch without garnering resentment. The rest of the world seems to have decided to work around him and wait him out until the pendulum swings back into sanity-ville.
 
2017-10-06 05:21:38 AM  
Is there anything this administration can not totally fark up?
 
2017-10-06 05:31:47 AM  

wax_on: Is there anything this administration can not totally fark up?


grifting
 
2017-10-06 05:35:35 AM  

lucksi: wax_on: Is there anything this administration can not totally fark up?

grifting


Hell they've probably boned that, too.
 
2017-10-06 05:39:12 AM  
Someone totally stole all of his Farmville cash!
 
2017-10-06 05:39:36 AM  

lucksi: wax_on: Is there anything this administration can not totally fark up?

grifting


Nah, they are farking that up, too.
 
2017-10-06 05:40:14 AM  

puffy999: lucksi: wax_on: Is there anything this administration can not totally fark up?

grifting

Hell they've probably boned that, too.


Rats, beat me to it.  8-)
 
2017-10-06 05:41:49 AM  

thisispete: irvingsmiley: As I have said elsewhere on the intarwebs, the rest of the world is either laughing at us or shaking their heads at us. All of us, every US citizen. I live overseas now, and I have personal experience to show for this.

I'm a foreigner. All 7.2 billion of us got together behind your backs and we pretty much all agree you guys are crazy.

Seriously, Trump doesn't command a lot of respect. He doesn't respect any previous deals and doesn't get that you can't shake up the international order like an etch-a-sketch without garnering resentment. The rest of the world seems to have decided to work around him and wait him out until the pendulum swings back into sanity-ville.


I don't know. I don't think we can trust you with the keys to the world anymore. First you crash the worlds economy then the nice mechanic you hire to fix it can't do anything because you tie his hands because you can't get over that he is a black man telling you what to do. It's finally working again and you hand it over to the tweaker that says he can make it goes fast by unhooking the brakes and loosening the wheels . Now he's screaming from the hood like the Fury Road guitarist as you careen down the road about to crash into Korea town or the Pita Pit.
 
2017-10-06 05:42:45 AM  

irvingsmiley: puffy999: lucksi: wax_on: Is there anything this administration can not totally fark up?

grifting

Hell they've probably boned that, too.

Rats, beat me to it.  8-)


Hey if there is an administration that knows about boners, this is it.
 
2017-10-06 05:46:32 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-10-06 05:46:39 AM  
Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.
 
2017-10-06 05:49:32 AM  

Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.


Jesus, what did that strawman do to you that you had to beat it like that?
 
2017-10-06 05:53:00 AM  

dracos31: Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.

Jesus, what did that strawman do to you that you had to beat it like that?


You know "straw man" means something other than "argument I can't refute", yes?
 
2017-10-06 06:04:55 AM  
Oh for fuksakè, someone please rescue us from this perdition.

I want to know who had access to his phone... There is no doubt in my mind that Russian operatives are running amok in Trump's White House.
 
2017-10-06 06:15:25 AM  
Android, I'm assuming? Given the fact that every other app in the Android store seems to have been created by someone with a name like Xiong Liaopiaddong, isn't it safe to say nearly every Android phone is chock-full-o-malware?
 
2017-10-06 06:15:41 AM  

backhand.slap.of.reason: Oh for fuksakè, someone please rescue us from this perdition.

I want to know who had access to his phone... There is no doubt in my mind that Russian operatives are running amok in Trump's White House.


The Russians are having a secret occupation in plain site, basically.
 
2017-10-06 06:16:23 AM  

Tanqueray: They're leaking unflattering stuff about Kelly? Friday news dump here we come.


I would be surprised if he makes it to Sunday without "stepping down". I think Trump is getting sick of his Babysitter being too strict with him. Unfortunately, that means we're all boned.
 
2017-10-06 06:18:21 AM  

thisispete: The rest of the world seems to have decided to work around him and wait him out until the pendulum swings back into sanity-ville.


Unfortunately, Obama ain't coming out of retirement. Mores the pity...
 
2017-10-06 06:21:50 AM  
It would be the height of stupidity if he had to pay extra data charges because the phone was constantly videoing/audio recording everything and sending it back to China/Russia.

/so that's probably what happened too
 
2017-10-06 06:22:32 AM  

Next week's Tom Sawyer: dracos31: Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.

Jesus, what did that strawman do to you that you had to beat it like that?

You know "straw man" means something other than "argument I can't refute", yes?


Maybe to someone with a lick of common sense.  You on the other hand...
 
2017-10-06 06:23:20 AM  

Summoner101: An administration that can't even enact routine IT security.


who knew hacking could be so complicated?
 
2017-10-06 06:28:21 AM  
"My cellphone often asks me to speak up.  Strange thing I wasn't using my cellphone.  I always spoke up."

This made-up quote probably isn't far from reality.
 
2017-10-06 06:31:47 AM  

Guybird: Next week's Tom Sawyer: dracos31: Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.

Jesus, what did that strawman do to you that you had to beat it like that?

You know "straw man" means something other than "argument I can't refute", yes?

Maybe to someone with a lick of common sense.  You on the other hand...


Right, I'm the only one not jumping on the "hurrr durrr incompetence" bandwagon because I know a thing or two about mobile security and how personal devices not used for government business are completely out of the purview of government security policies. I also seem to be the only one who read the article which says while several administration personnel have a problem with using personal email for government business, Kelley isn't one of them.

But hey, facts you know. Don't let them get in the way. And attack anyone who brings them up, right? Christ, where did all the smart farkers go?
 
2017-10-06 06:31:50 AM  
Should have gotten an iPhone.

COME AT ME BRO!
 
2017-10-06 06:33:44 AM  

puffy999: [img.fark.net image 302x357]


Serious question:

Anyone know if that gif is an original comic panel or if it's been altered?
 
2017-10-06 06:35:30 AM  

dracos31: Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.

Jesus, what did that strawman do to you that you had to beat it like that?


Excuse me, but you missed how that strawman was toting a tu quoque.
 
2017-10-06 06:35:49 AM  

backhand.slap.of.reason: Oh for fuksakè, someone please rescue us from this perdition.

I want to know who had access to his phone... There is no doubt in my mind that Russian operatives are running amok in Trump's White House.


img.fark.netYou never fail...
 
2017-10-06 06:38:15 AM  

The Soupman Cumeth: Should have gotten an iPhone.

COME AT ME BRO!


No point in coming after you. Your iPhone is too slow to keep up with today's Androids, anyway. hell, my mid-range LG G6 could stomp all over any iPhone.

Sad.
 
2017-10-06 06:40:25 AM  
Staffers reviewed the cellphone for several days and tried to decipher what had happened to it, the officials said. Many functions on the phone were not working.  The IT department concluded the phone had been compromised and should not be used further, according to the memo.

This sounds like a Geek Squad diagnosis.  "We don't know why many functions aren't functioning so you must have been hacked."

Pretty sure state-sponsored hackers avoid leaving such obvious evidence that something's not right.
 
2017-10-06 06:40:58 AM  

Wyalt Derp: Why are personal phones allowed near anything classified? We weren't allowed to take them into the datacentre I used to work in.


Years ago when they started to put cameras in phones the account I was working at made us put them in our cars or supervisors desk. And they were not even a security firm, they were a non profit.
 
2017-10-06 06:42:40 AM  

MmmmBacon: The Soupman Cumeth: Should have gotten an iPhone.

COME AT ME BRO!

No point in coming after you. Your iPhone is too slow to keep up with today's Androids, anyway. hell, my mid-range LG G6 could stomp all over any iPhone.

Sad.


You missed the Fark-centric sarcasm.

Though, in honesty-iPhones are indeed much more secure by design.
 
2017-10-06 06:44:58 AM  

BarkingUnicorn: Staffers reviewed the cellphone for several days and tried to decipher what had happened to it, the officials said. Many functions on the phone were not working.  The IT department concluded the phone had been compromised and should not be used further, according to the memo.

This sounds like a Geek Squad diagnosis.  "We don't know why many functions aren't functioning so you must have been hacked."

Pretty sure state-sponsored hackers avoid leaving such obvious evidence that something's not right.


I thought that was weird too. FBI is just a few blocks down the street. Why not have someone there look at it instead?
 
2017-10-06 06:47:34 AM  
I expect nothing less with this administration.
 
2017-10-06 06:51:39 AM  

Next week's Tom Sawyer: Guybird: Next week's Tom Sawyer: dracos31: Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.

Jesus, what did that strawman do to you that you had to beat it like that?

You know "straw man" means something other than "argument I can't refute", yes?

Maybe to someone with a lick of common sense.  You on the other hand...

Right, I'm the only one not jumping on the "hurrr durrr incompetence" bandwagon because I know a thing or two about mobile security and how personal devices not used for government business are completely out of the purview of government security policies. I also seem to be the only one who read the article which says while several administration personnel have a problem with using personal email for government business, Kelley isn't one of them.

But hey, facts you know. Don't let them get in the way. And attack anyone who brings them up, right? Christ, where did all the smart farkers go?


You act like 90% of government officials don't just do whatever the hell they want and tell their lackeys to deal with it. All of them like to use their own private email systems and a large number of them prefer their own particular cell phone over a blackberry. Just because we know that it's all bad security practices doesn't mean they don't have the clout to ignore it.
 
2017-10-06 06:54:50 AM  

The Soupman Cumeth: backhand.slap.of.reason: Oh for fuksakè, someone please rescue us from this perdition.

I want to know who had access to his phone... There is no doubt in my mind that Russian operatives are running amok in Trump's White House.

[img.fark.net image 425x288]You never fail...


It's hard to disagree with the idea that those responsible for breaching security of a high ranking political figure in the USA are Russian operatives.

Have you paid attention to what they've been doing, or have you just swept it all aside by saying anyone raising concerns over Russian activities are just crazy trying to ascribe all issues to Russia? If so go ahead and tag me as Everything is Russia as well, because since the election last year it's been looking a lot like everything has been Russia. Although I'll leave the door open for it being Chinese, or Israeli's, or Merkel. But it's likely Russia. They've compromised everything, it seems.
 
2017-10-06 06:55:38 AM  

Next week's Tom Sawyer: I also seem to be the only one who read the article which says while several administration personnel have a problem with using personal email for government business, Kelley isn't one of them.


TFA didn't say that.  It said, "A White House official told Politico that Kelly used his government-issued phone for most communications since he joined the administration as Trump's secretary of homeland security. Kelly became chief of staff in July.
The details surrounding when, where, or how the phone was compromised, and what information might have been accessed, are all unclear,Politico reported."

I'm sure you didn't mean to lie about that and instead it was just your misunderstanding which led you to state untruths as facts just now.
 
2017-10-06 07:20:38 AM  

The Envoy: Next week's Tom Sawyer: I also seem to be the only one who read the article which says while several administration personnel have a problem with using personal email for government business, Kelley isn't one of them.

TFA didn't say that.  It said, "A White House official told Politico that Kelly used his government-issued phone for most communications since he joined the administration as Trump's secretary of homeland security. Kelly became chief of staff in July.
The details surrounding when, where, or how the phone was compromised, and what information might have been accessed, are all unclear,Politico reported."

I'm sure you didn't mean to lie about that and instead it was just your misunderstanding which led you to state untruths as facts just now.


But those Farklibs sure done got it stugg to 'em!
 
2017-10-06 07:26:37 AM  

Next week's Tom Sawyer: Its his personal phone, which he doesn't use much or even at all since being issued a government phone. And there's no reason to believe he had anything work-related on the phone or kept the phone at his office in the White House.

Great big nothingburger. But please do tell us how this couldn't or wouldn't have happened under an Obama or Clinton administration so we can laugh in your face.


Lol, not sure if trolling, or typical Trump supporter...7/10.

/well
//oiled
///machine
 
2017-10-06 07:29:57 AM  

Next week's Tom Sawyer: personal devices not used for government business


I think I found the flaw in your analysis :)
 
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