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(Digital Spy)   Supreme Leader Snoke isn't the real villain of the last Jedi. It's--you guessed it--Jar Jar Binks. [Warning: Potential Spoilers]   ( digitalspy.com) divider line
    More: PSA, Star Wars, Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Force Awakens, Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back, Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Snoke, JJ Abrams  
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4006 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 29 Sep 2017 at 11:34 PM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2017-09-29 07:45:09 PM  
19 votes:
The real villain of the prequels is George Lucas.
2017-09-29 08:36:04 PM  
13 votes:
The plot of the original movie is hilariously unoriginal. The reason is worked is because it had a perfect blend of just enough novelty in concepts, excellent chemistry with the cast, and a brilliant score, combined with lesser amounts of awesome in terms of dialogue, effects, design, and so on. It was like any other space opera serial, except it did everything right, and happened to be a full-length movie, instead of a series of 22 min. radio shows.

I loved Rogue One, but Episode VII was crap. Almost pure garbage with the exception of how the leads performed.

The plot? Episode IV but "BIGGER" and "COOLER". The villain? Pfft. The plot twist? Oh, wait, there wasn't one. Killing Han? Who didn't see it a mile away?

They had a chance to do something awesome and original and unexpected, but they didn't. If they wanted to impress us, then we should have seen something like Kylo watching Han get killed by stormtroopers, and then deciding "Screw this, I'm going back to the light." Instead we saw Han die for basically no reason, and everyone acts like f*cking caricatures, just going through the motions of what they would obviously do based on what we already knew about them.

And then R2 suddenly and conveniently awakens to provide Luke's location. What a load of contrived, deus ex machina horsesh*t.

And I swear Abrams was screwing with the genuine fans on purpose, going out of his way to. Perfect example? Han using a bowcaster. It f*cked with the real fans and added nothing to the plot.

I keep trying to think back to things I liked about Ep. VII, but every single time I think I've thought of something I realize it's actually from Rogue One.
2017-09-29 10:37:34 PM  
9 votes:
Hey a Star Wars thread, time for everyone to take time out of their busy schedule to shiat on it. Right on schedule. You know it's been 18 years since Jar Jar's had any more than five lines? Isn't there a statute of limitations on this shiat?

Anyway, having Luke being the bad guy would be a big mistake.
2017-09-29 11:41:43 PM  
7 votes:

Mugato: Hey a Star Wars thread, time for everyone to take time out of their busy schedule to shiat on it. Right on schedule. You know it's been 18 years since Jar Jar's had any more than five lines? Isn't there a statute of limitations on this shiat?

Anyway, having Luke being the bad guy would be a big mistake.


Jar Jar wasn't even the worst thing in Phantom Menace, not by a long shot. And the rat bastard actually redeemed himself a little in the Clone Wars series, so I can't really fuss.

And I've never really understood the hatred for those blood thirsty mini-wookies either.
2017-09-29 08:20:01 PM  
6 votes:
img.fark.netView Full Size
2017-09-30 07:21:43 AM  
5 votes:
True villain of the entire Star Wars enterprise:
img.fark.netView Full Size

/So obvious!
2017-09-30 05:04:41 AM  
5 votes:
Think about that. Why would JJ Abrams and his Force Awakens team be so secretive about the Supreme Leader, if there wasn't something to hide?

Because as usual he's just making this shiat up as he goes?
2017-09-30 08:17:28 AM  
4 votes:
Leia makes the most sense as the villain. She lost her brother and her son then later her husband. She's force sensitive but has no training so she's susceptible to the dark side. She adopts the Snoke persona to keep tabs on Kylo Ren. She sticks with the Resistance to quietly sabotage them. Plus the overall lack of evil female characters in the movies.

C'mon Disney....dooo eeet.
2017-09-30 02:15:19 AM  
4 votes:
I am really sick of fan theories in general.  I'd rather wait and just enjoy the ride.
2017-09-29 10:10:18 PM  
3 votes:

Sid_6.7: The plot of the original movie is hilariously unoriginal. The reason is worked is because it had a perfect blend of just enough novelty in concepts, excellent chemistry with the cast, and a brilliant score, combined with lesser amounts of awesome in terms of dialogue, effects, design, and so on. It was like any other space opera serial, except it did everything right, and happened to be a full-length movie, instead of a series of 22 min. radio shows.

I loved Rogue One, but Episode VII was crap. Almost pure garbage with the exception of how the leads performed.

The plot? Episode IV but "BIGGER" and "COOLER". The villain? Pfft. The plot twist? Oh, wait, there wasn't one. Killing Han? Who didn't see it a mile away?

They had a chance to do something awesome and original and unexpected, but they didn't. If they wanted to impress us, then we should have seen something like Kylo watching Han get killed by stormtroopers, and then deciding "Screw this, I'm going back to the light." Instead we saw Han die for basically no reason, and everyone acts like f*cking caricatures, just going through the motions of what they would obviously do based on what we already knew about them.

And then R2 suddenly and conveniently awakens to provide Luke's location. What a load of contrived, deus ex machina horsesh*t.

And I swear Abrams was screwing with the genuine fans on purpose, going out of his way to. Perfect example? Han using a bowcaster. It f*cked with the real fans and added nothing to the plot.

I keep trying to think back to things I liked about Ep. VII, but every single time I think I've thought of something I realize it's actually from Rogue One.


Rogue One is now my measure. I grew up with the original threequle. But I really only want to explore Lucas' galaxy with "A Star Wars Story" movies.
2017-09-29 08:15:14 PM  
3 votes:
I'm sorry, but did this article just say that we got a glimpse of The Emperor in A New Hope? Was this thin procedurally generated?
2017-09-30 02:48:41 PM  
2 votes:

TheMarchHare: What would Luke's motivation even be for turning to the dark side? Luke saw the cost it had on his father why would he go down that road also?


It's the type of cheap, gimmicky twist that seems to have become common in movies lately.
2017-09-30 10:21:24 AM  
2 votes:

AaronSynn: A glimpse of the Emperor in New Hope?

DID LUCAS PUT OUT ANOTHER NEW VERSION I DON'T KNOW ABOUT?


There are new scenes every time you watch. It can only be a matter of time.
2017-09-30 09:58:44 AM  
2 votes:
A glimpse of the Emperor in New Hope?

DID LUCAS PUT OUT ANOTHER NEW VERSION I DON'T KNOW ABOUT?
2017-09-30 08:49:40 AM  
2 votes:
Jar Jar is a farking street clown on Naboo. There, mystery solved. And yes, it's canon so farkING DEAL WITH IR.
2017-09-30 07:06:36 AM  
2 votes:
Spoiler alert? More like speculation alert.

As for the theory, it could be really good if they pull it off right. The Gray-Jedi 'way of balance' thing would probably be the best way to go with it, since I don't think there will ever be a Dark Luke story as good as the one from Dark Empire.

If Abrams were still directing, I'd say it would probably end up being some lame bullshiat like 'Luke was actually Snoke the whole time,' or something equally dumb and over the top and a total screw-you to Luke's character. But it's important to remember that Rian Johnson is the guy who directed some of the best episodes of Breaking Bad; he knows how to put emotional weight to a scene.
2017-09-30 06:30:32 AM  
2 votes:

Sid_6.7: The plot of the original movie is hilariously unoriginal. The reason is worked is because it had a perfect blend of just enough novelty in concepts, excellent chemistry with the cast, and a brilliant score, combined with lesser amounts of awesome in terms of dialogue, effects, design, and so on. It was like any other space opera serial, except it did everything right, and happened to be a full-length movie, instead of a series of 22 min. radio shows.

I loved Rogue One, but Episode VII was crap. Almost pure garbage with the exception of how the leads performed.

The plot? Episode IV but "BIGGER" and "COOLER". The villain? Pfft. The plot twist? Oh, wait, there wasn't one. Killing Han? Who didn't see it a mile away?

They had a chance to do something awesome and original and unexpected, but they didn't. If they wanted to impress us, then we should have seen something like Kylo watching Han get killed by stormtroopers, and then deciding "Screw this, I'm going back to the light." Instead we saw Han die for basically no reason, and everyone acts like f*cking caricatures, just going through the motions of what they would obviously do based on what we already knew about them.

And then R2 suddenly and conveniently awakens to provide Luke's location. What a load of contrived, deus ex machina horsesh*t.

And I swear Abrams was screwing with the genuine fans on purpose, going out of his way to. Perfect example? Han using a bowcaster. It f*cked with the real fans and added nothing to the plot.

I keep trying to think back to things I liked about Ep. VII, but every single time I think I've thought of something I realize it's actually from Rogue One.


Not smart at all. The effects in the original were like nothing ever seen before.
2017-09-30 03:08:25 AM  
2 votes:
I'm torn between not wanting Luke to go dark side, but also wanting the sequel trilogy to go completely apeshiat crazy.
2017-09-30 02:24:39 AM  
2 votes:

Sid_6.7: The plot of the original movie is hilariously unoriginal. The reason is worked is because it had a perfect blend of just enough novelty in concepts, excellent chemistry with the cast, and a brilliant score, combined with lesser amounts of awesome in terms of dialogue, effects, design, and so on. It was like any other space opera serial, except it did everything right, and happened to be a full-length movie, instead of a series of 22 min. radio shows.

I loved Rogue One, but Episode VII was crap. Almost pure garbage with the exception of how the leads performed.

The plot? Episode IV but "BIGGER" and "COOLER". The villain? Pfft. The plot twist? Oh, wait, there wasn't one. Killing Han? Who didn't see it a mile away?

They had a chance to do something awesome and original and unexpected, but they didn't. If they wanted to impress us, then we should have seen something like Kylo watching Han get killed by stormtroopers, and then deciding "Screw this, I'm going back to the light." Instead we saw Han die for basically no reason, and everyone acts like f*cking caricatures, just going through the motions of what they would obviously do based on what we already knew about them.

And then R2 suddenly and conveniently awakens to provide Luke's location. What a load of contrived, deus ex machina horsesh*t.

And I swear Abrams was screwing with the genuine fans on purpose, going out of his way to. Perfect example? Han using a bowcaster. It f*cked with the real fans and added nothing to the plot.

I keep trying to think back to things I liked about Ep. VII, but every single time I think I've thought of something I realize it's actually from Rogue One.


Hey kids! I'm being cool because I hate SW 7. Look how cool I am.
2017-09-30 02:06:03 PM  
1 vote:
FTA " In A New Hope, we got just a tantalising glimpse of the Emperor. "

and author instantly loses all credibility, going from potentially wild speculation to, hasn't got a fooking clue.
2017-09-30 02:01:42 PM  
1 vote:

jayphat: Jar Jar is a farking street clown on Naboo. There, mystery solved. And yes, it's canon so farkING DEAL WITH IR.


Yep. He's a street clown desperately going through his slapstick schtick to try and get people to like him again, but they all avoid and despise him because they blame him for Palpatine's rise to power. 

Gotta love Chuck Wendig.
2017-09-30 06:24:42 AM  
1 vote:

kronicfeld: I'm sorry, but did this article just say that we got a glimpse of The Emperor in A New Hope? Was this thin procedurally generated?


Yeah, stopped reading right there.  If this "author" (or more likely shiatty algorithm) is that unaware, there's no reason to waste any more time reading that nonsense.
2017-09-30 01:48:27 AM  
1 vote:

kronicfeld: I'm sorry, but did this article just say that we got a glimpse of The Emperor in A New Hope? Was this thin procedurally generated?


Author also apparently thinks Kylo Ren's birth name is "Ben Kenobi". /facepalm
2017-09-30 01:07:44 AM  
1 vote:
If Luke is the bad guy it's in the name of balance in the force.  That could be a little righteous, but that's the Jedi way.  It also plays into the name of the film, since the rumor has always been that Luke was going to embrace the "gray jedi" middleground that brings its own balance.  That makes him a "bad guy", but not the evil guy. I believe that Luke will be a rebel to the end.  The guy is still pissed about missing out on Tosche Station, so he's only going to do what he wants from now on
2017-09-30 12:53:31 AM  
1 vote:
I thought we all agreed Smoke was Scrappy-doo in disguise.
2017-09-29 11:41:26 PM  
1 vote:
I'm not going to RTFA if it's another dumb rehash of the Darth Jar-Jar theory.
2017-09-29 09:14:15 PM  
1 vote:
Barry Hines' classic novel A Kestrel for a Knave was adapted to film by Ken Loach as Kes. The novel's title refers to the historical practice of certain raptors being allowed only to certain classes of society.

The kestrel dies at the end.
2017-09-29 09:04:54 PM  
1 vote:
In The Crying Game, one of the characters had a penis.

I forget which one.
 
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