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(Mediaite)   "Usually when Trump goes all-in on a loser, it's a casino," Jimmy Kimmel says of the Alabama clusterfark   ( mediaite.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Kimmel, Democratic Party, Jimmy Kimmel, support Luther Strange, President of the United States, Gay, Washington, D.C., United States Congress  
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974 clicks; posted to Politics » on 28 Sep 2017 at 6:11 PM (11 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



54 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2017-09-28 08:50:46 AM  
That's the joke. Alabama still lost because they're still too stupid to not keep electing those racist Pharisees that seem to infest the south like a plague.
 
2017-09-28 09:40:07 AM  
Or Manafort
or Bannon
or Spicer
or Gorka
or Comey
ad nauseam
 
2017-09-28 09:51:49 AM  
How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.
 
2017-09-28 12:55:44 PM  

bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.


Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.
 
2017-09-28 02:58:39 PM  
If we really ran America like a business we'd have shut down the Alabama branch office years ago for being such a money pit.
 
2017-09-28 03:05:55 PM  

tuxq: Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.


Does someone else want to explain it to him because I've gone through it too many times.
 
2017-09-28 03:19:44 PM  

pxlboy: That's the joke. Alabama still lost because they're still too stupid to not keep electing those racist Pharisees that seem to infest the south like a plague.


Glad you got out, eh? ;)
 
2017-09-28 04:54:41 PM  

MaxxLarge: pxlboy: That's the joke. Alabama still lost because they're still too stupid to not keep electing those racist Pharisees that seem to infest the south like a plague.

Glad you got out, eh? ;)


I come from Georgia and have spent enough time in the surround states to have had my fill of those god-bothering assholes and the ones they elect.
 
2017-09-28 05:43:14 PM  

bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.


#1 in STIGGINIT, which is the only thing that counts.
 
2017-09-28 06:16:21 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-09-28 06:18:03 PM  

bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.


Football is for libs.
Cornhole is for the new GOP
 
2017-09-28 06:18:09 PM  

bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.


Thank God they elected those Republicans. If the Democrats were in charge, they'd be 57th in everything.
 
2017-09-28 06:18:11 PM  
Well, this time Trump managed to pick only the second worst possible choice and Alabama Republican voters weren't going to have any of that.
 
2017-09-28 06:20:51 PM  

bdub77: 47th in education


They're just happy not to be forty tenth.
 
2017-09-28 06:22:08 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-09-28 06:25:52 PM  

bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.


Your leaving off the important categories like abortion rank and religious freedom ranking and number of guns.
 
2017-09-28 06:30:14 PM  

Unright: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Your leaving off the important categories like abortion rank and religious freedom ranking and number of guns.


#1 in handgun brandishing by future senators
 
2017-09-28 06:33:47 PM  

pxlboy: That's the joke. Alabama still lost because they're still too stupid to not keep electing those racist Pharisees that seem to infest the south like a plague.


And then they biatch about how government doesn't work
 
2017-09-28 06:36:25 PM  

pxlboy: That's the joke. Alabama still lost because they're still too stupid to not keep electing those racist Pharisees that seem to infest the south like a plague.


It's not a plague, it's opportunity. There's a market for stupid racists, and it's a market that is easy to exploit.
 
2017-09-28 06:36:34 PM  

imauniter: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Football is for libs.
Cornhole is for the new GOP


img.fark.netView Full Size

/Shamelessly stolen from http://www.fark.com/comments/9749154/111303740#c111303740
 
2017-09-28 06:37:32 PM  
in before "Kimmel should stick to being a terrible comedian/celebrity"  whilst sucking the hairs off a reality show host turned president's balls.
 
2017-09-28 06:41:45 PM  

Nuff Said McFarky: imauniter: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Football is for libs.
Cornhole is for the new GOP

[img.fark.net image 629x357]
/Shamelessly stolen from http://www.fark.com/comments/9749154/111303740#c111303740


In the end, the left will get custody of basically everything that doesn't goose step.
 
2017-09-28 06:41:59 PM  

Unright: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Your leaving off the important categories like abortion rank and religious freedom ranking and number of guns.


#3 in misspelling "you're"
 
2017-09-28 06:44:54 PM  
Somehow the guy from Crank Yankers became the next Jon Stewart.
 
2017-09-28 06:46:01 PM  

elkboy: Unright: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Your leaving off the important categories like abortion rank and religious freedom ranking and number of guns.

#3 in misspelling "you're"


4th in incest
 
2017-09-28 06:47:04 PM  

Catlenfell: Crank Yankers


That is a weird way yo spell "The Man Show"
 
2017-09-28 06:49:01 PM  

Mugato: tuxq: Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.

Does someone else want to explain it to him because I've gone through it too many times.


Not it!
 
2017-09-28 07:02:51 PM  

Catlenfell: Somehow the guy from Crank Yankers became the next Jon Stewart.


Somehow that short jewish comedian who was in a bunch of B movies became one of the most respected political observers of our time.
 
2017-09-28 07:08:13 PM  
Also didnt he bang sarah silverman? Id love to do that, lucky bastard.
 
2017-09-28 07:13:16 PM  

bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.


I point shiat like this out to right wingers I know when they biatch about Detroit and Baltimore.  They're Pavlovian response is to scream that it's somehow the federal governments fault.
 
2017-09-28 07:13:27 PM  

STDMan69: Also didnt he bang sarah silverman? Id love to do that, lucky bastard.


Wasn't she farking Matt Damon?
 
2017-09-28 07:14:59 PM  

Bith Set Me Up: STDMan69: Also didnt he bang sarah silverman? Id love to do that, lucky bastard.

Wasn't she farking Matt Damon?


Yeah, so he farked Ben Affleck.
 
2017-09-28 07:15:36 PM  

HighOnCraic: Mugato: tuxq: Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.

Does someone else want to explain it to him because I've gone through it too many times.

Not it!


Here it comes to save the day...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_strategy
 
2017-09-28 07:19:30 PM  
Kimmel is inviting Trump's scorn.
Good for him. Like Nixon, being on Trump's enemies list is a badge of honor.
 
2017-09-28 07:23:06 PM  

DrD'isInfotainment: Kimmel is inviting Trump's scorn.
Good for him. Like Nixon, being on Trump's enemies list is a badge of honor.


to be fair, over 2/3 of this country is already on that list.   the remaining 1/3 are on borrowed time.
 
2017-09-28 07:26:48 PM  

HedlessChickn: HighOnCraic: Mugato: tuxq: Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.

Does someone else want to explain it to him because I've gone through it too many times.

Not it!

Here it comes to save the day...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_strategy


I suspect he would rather reference this:

http://www.conservapedia.com/Southern_strategy
 
2017-09-28 07:28:44 PM  

Emposter: HedlessChickn: HighOnCraic: Mugato: tuxq: Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.

Does someone else want to explain it to him because I've gone through it too many times.

Not it!

Here it comes to save the day...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_strategy

I suspect he would rather reference this:

http://www.conservapedia.com/Southern_strategy


Jeebus, the first two paragraphs...
 
2017-09-28 07:29:03 PM  

Bith Set Me Up: STDMan69: Also didnt he bang sarah silverman? Id love to do that, lucky bastard.

Wasn't she farking Matt Damon?


I'd hate to do that
 
2017-09-28 07:32:01 PM  
That's pretty good, but submitter left out the best jokes:

"The guy who won, Roy Moore, got his big endorsement from Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty," Kimmel said, "in case you worried America wasn't officially a reality show yet."

Kimmel called Moore a "terrible person" for calling the 9/11 attacks a "divine intervention" and that he "hates gay people so much," there is "literally no way he isn't one of them."

He also mocked Strange, who he said is "back to work trying to kill Superman."

As we've mentioned before, Baby Donald deliberately runs his casinos into the ground. That's how money laundering works, apparently. Unless he's shiatty at that, too, and it wouldn't surprise me.
 
2017-09-28 07:34:15 PM  
Stick around for the second portion of the video. Jimmy solution is saying Trump should be made King, no power just KING Trump the Last.
 
2017-09-28 07:37:41 PM  
I've never cared much for Kimmel but I may have to change my opinion of him.

If we could just get 50 more comics making fun of every Trump mistake, maybe he'd pop his cork and croak in mid-twitter. All "Castle of Aaargh..." like.
 
2017-09-28 07:39:21 PM  

KiwDaWabbit: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Thank God they elected those Republicans. If the Democrats were in charge, they'd be 57th in everything.


Also #57 in arithmetic
 
2017-09-28 07:49:30 PM  
There HAS to be a way to somehow flood Alabama or nuke it, dig a huge sinkhole under it. The just has to be a way!
 
2017-09-28 07:57:58 PM  

BetterMetalSnake: KiwDaWabbit: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Thank God they elected those Republicans. If the Democrats were in charge, they'd be 57th in everything.

Also #57 in arithmetic


But they would tell you they are #1 in Jesus and that is all that counts well that and Roll Tide.
 
2017-09-28 08:10:03 PM  
Flappyhead: http://www.conservapedia.com/Southern_strategy
Jeebus, the first two paragraphs...


These are the same assholes who are trying to write a conservative version of the Bible because God's Word is too liberal for them. I wish I was kidding.
 
2017-09-28 08:13:04 PM  

STDMan69: elkboy: Unright: bdub77: How's all that electing Republicans working out for you Alabama? Let's run the numbers:

dead last in infant mortality
2nd most obese state in the country
3rd worst business environment in the country
47th in education
47th in healthcare
45th in economy
42nd in crime
42nd in government
40th in overall opportunity

Oh but #1 in football. That's all that counts. So the thing you're best at is dominated by black people.

Your leaving off the important categories like abortion rank and religious freedom ranking and number of guns.

#3 in misspelling "you're"

4th in incest


What? They passed Missouri??
 
2017-09-28 08:15:26 PM  

Ed Grubermann: Flappyhead: http://www.conservapedia.com/Southern_strategy
Jeebus, the first two paragraphs...

These are the same assholes who are trying to write a conservative version of the Bible because God's Word is too liberal for them. I wish I was kidding.


Are they going to work with Metapedia to make sure ancient Jerusalem is whiter than Utah?
 
2017-09-28 08:24:44 PM  
Kimmel should stick to being a terrible comedian/celebrity. Now if you'll excuse me I need to use some Trump Dental Floss.
 
2017-09-28 08:28:07 PM  

Emposter: HedlessChickn: HighOnCraic: Mugato: tuxq: Well they're not too keen on Democrats because of that whole slavery and segregation thing they were so fond of.

Does someone else want to explain it to him because I've gone through it too many times.

Not it!

Here it comes to save the day...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_strategy

I suspect he would rather reference this:

http://www.conservapedia.com/Southern_strategy


LOL!

"The reality is that liberals have always played the racist card far more often than Republicans do.
See also
Liberals and racism: the historical racist support the Democratic Party had."

I can't even.
 
2017-09-28 08:32:42 PM  

Ed Grubermann: Flappyhead: http://www.conservapedia.com/Southern_strategy
Jeebus, the first two paragraphs...

These are the same assholes who are trying to write a conservative version of the Bible because God's Word is too liberal for them. I wish I was kidding.


It's why they hated Jimmy Carter. Carter was somebody who walked the walk and talked the talk about Jesus' ideals.
 
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