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(The Atlantic)   Eighty years after its release, a look back at one of the most infamous boring books of all time that really needed a good editor to tighten it up   ( theatlantic.com) divider line
    More: Followup, little Bilbo, multibillion-dollar media franchise, The Lord of the Rings, sword-and-sandal epic scale, George R.R. Martin, World War, Donald Trump, Bilbo Baggins  
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6825 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Sep 2017 at 10:06 PM (11 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-09-24 06:07:28 PM  
Are you sure you're not confusing The Hobbit with The Lord of the Rings, subby?
 
2017-09-24 06:20:00 PM  
My first fantasy book. And it really hooked me. The only things I didn't like were the singing (which I thought the first Hobbit movie fixed for me) and the mountains fighting. That scene in the book is brief, but seemed pointless. The movie keeping it was stupid.

Still. The riddle game. The ring that made him invisible. Just an incredible story for a 10 year old.
 
2017-09-24 06:35:52 PM  
Hobbit Hater.
 
2017-09-24 06:48:58 PM  
The Princess Bride by S. Morgenstern.
 
2017-09-24 07:03:15 PM  
Nah. That one's not too bad. It only takes 80 or so pages to get going.

LotR takes f*cking ages. And by the time it gets going the hobbits spend like another 100 pages travelling aimlessly in the wrong direction.
 
2017-09-24 07:09:27 PM  
It's no "The Eye of Argon".
 
2017-09-24 07:09:58 PM  

Shostie: Nah. That one's not too bad. It only takes 80 or so pages to get going.

LotR takes f*cking ages. And by the time it gets going the hobbits spend like another 100 pages travelling aimlessly in the wrong direction.


Some anime suffer from this
 
2017-09-24 07:33:52 PM  

mutterfark: The Princess Bride by S. Morgenstern.


The hat chapter was the best part. I can't believe Goldstein cut it out.
 
2017-09-24 07:39:43 PM  
Rowan Atkinson - funny Shakespear
Youtube DKXQbIBt9C8
 
2017-09-24 07:49:04 PM  
Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.
 
2017-09-24 07:56:37 PM  

fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.


Something fishy?
 
2017-09-24 08:22:12 PM  
Atlas Shrugged?

No wait, that needed a really good grease, vodka and cigarette fire (presumably with the author passed out drunk after flicking one out to a rape fantasy)
 
2017-09-24 08:32:48 PM  

Nadie_AZ: My first fantasy book. And it really hooked me. The only things I didn't like were the singing (which I thought the first Hobbit movie fixed for me) and the mountains fighting. That scene in the book is brief, but seemed pointless. The movie keeping it was stupid.

Still. The riddle game. The ring that made him invisible. Just an incredible story for a 10 year old.


It was my first real fantasy book, too. I was 15, a friend's older brother turned us on to it.
 
2017-09-24 08:33:06 PM  
Mein Kampf?
 
2017-09-24 08:34:24 PM  

fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.


It's been a while, but I saw plenty of threads with comments get nuked in TFD.
 
2017-09-24 08:35:03 PM  
* I didn't see the thread you're referring to, though.
 
2017-09-24 09:13:17 PM  

fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.


I never saw that thread.

I have seen threads disappear, with comments and all.

The "Teen Vogue Guide to Butt Sex" thread did that.

It did get rather raunchy. And inappropriate.

Was funny as hell, but.....
 
2017-09-24 09:28:56 PM  

RJReves: fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.

I never saw that thread.

I have seen threads disappear, with comments and all.

The "Teen Vogue Guide to Butt Sex" thread did that.

It did get rather raunchy. And inappropriate.

Was funny as hell, but.....


img.fark.netView Full Size


Took a screenie before it went away.
 
2017-09-24 09:29:46 PM  
Finnegans Wake is only 78.

There was a time when I was young and pretentious enough to plow through any work: Ulysses Grant's Memoirs, Boswell's Life of Johnson, Faust, Paradise Lost, the Pilgrim's Progress, The Sickness Unto Death. A lot of them I even enjoyed, in places.

Finnegans Wake broke me before I made it 5 pages.
 
2017-09-24 09:37:51 PM  

fusillade762: RJReves: fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.

I never saw that thread.

I have seen threads disappear, with comments and all.

The "Teen Vogue Guide to Butt Sex" thread did that.

It did get rather raunchy. And inappropriate.

Was funny as hell, but.....

[Link][img.fark.net image 664x308]

Took a screenie before it went away.


I think the Teen Vogue one said we weren't adult enough for Teen Vogue. LOL.
 
2017-09-24 10:12:05 PM  

Shostie: Nah. That one's not too bad. It only takes 80 or so pages to get going.

LotR takes f*cking ages. And by the time it gets going the hobbits spend like another 100 pages travelling aimlessly in the wrong direction.


At least with LOTR you know it's going to pay off.  It's a really slow start, but that full trilogy is totally worth it.
 
2017-09-24 10:15:55 PM  
My favorite part was where the sun came up and subby turned into stone.
 
2017-09-24 10:16:27 PM  
It is one of my favorite books.

Though I say that as a person who did not care for "Lord of the Rings".
 
2017-09-24 10:22:54 PM  
It's telling that someone making fun of a book in a headline can't use correct grammer to do so.
 
2017-09-24 10:28:46 PM  
Subby isn't wrong- for all the things that Tolkien got right in his books, pacing wasn't one of them. He could create memorable characters in interesting situations for increasingly higher stakes, but then he'd go and put a three-page song or an entire chapter about how this time the main characters were running instead of walking in there. It may have served a purpose from a myth-building perspective, but it did not suit the novel medium.
 
2017-09-24 10:31:46 PM  

Garza and the Supermutants: Finnegans Wake is only 78.

There was a time when I was young and pretentious enough to plow through any work: Ulysses Grant's Memoirs, Boswell's Life of Johnson, Faust, Paradise Lost, the Pilgrim's Progress, The Sickness Unto Death. A lot of them I even enjoyed, in places.

Finnegans Wake broke me before I made it 5 pages.


Finnegan's Wake is the gold standard in fiction. Trouble is, no one has any idea what that standard is for or means.

But we can all agree that whatever it is, it's good at it
 
2017-09-24 10:32:54 PM  
Perhaps coloring books are more subby's speed. It's not like trying to read the freaking Silmarillion.
 
2017-09-24 10:34:02 PM  
Anything by Dickens?

/much longer ago than 80 years
 
2017-09-24 10:45:24 PM  
I actually just read The Hobbit for the first time on vacation last week.  Having a difficult time understanding how Peter Jackson got 3 movies out this.  Or even 2 for that matter.  I was purposely waiting to watch them until I'd finally gotten around to the book.

Now I have to wonder - is the "I'm a shark, suck my dick" meme based on Smaug?  Because that's what he seems like.  Goes around telling everyone what a fire-breathing badass he is, then gets killed by Some Dude who doesn't even have magic or good weapons.
 
2017-09-24 10:58:40 PM  

Nadie_AZ: My first fantasy book. And it really hooked me. The only things I didn't like were the singing (which I thought the first Hobbit movie fixed for me) and the mountains fighting. That scene in the book is brief, but seemed pointless. The movie keeping it was stupid.

Still. The riddle game. The ring that made him invisible. Just an incredible story for a 10 year old.


The Hobbit
The Chronicles of Narnia
The Chronicles of Prydain
 
2017-09-24 11:02:50 PM  
The Bible was released longer than that.
Dear, God. Please provide a decent editor next time you release a book.
 
2017-09-24 11:05:32 PM  

shroom: I actually just read The Hobbit for the first time on vacation last week.  Having a difficult time understanding how Peter Jackson got 3 movies out this.  Or even 2 for that matter.  I was purposely waiting to watch them until I'd finally gotten around to the book.

Now I have to wonder - is the "I'm a shark, suck my dick" meme based on Smaug?  Because that's what he seems like.  Goes around telling everyone what a fire-breathing badass he is, then gets killed by Some Dude who doesn't even have magic or good weapons.


Jackson did a very piss-poor job with The Hobbit. Bard the Bowman was sort of Aragorn v0.5; descended from kings of old. Also, he had the one place on Smaug's belly that was missing a scale pointed out to him by the thrush. So, it was the 'Luke Skywalker' shot of it's day.
 
2017-09-24 11:06:07 PM  
Just like the director of the movies.
 
2017-09-24 11:06:33 PM  

Catlenfell: The Bible was released longer than that.
Dear, God. Please provide a decent editor next time you release a book.


I'd settle for some better commandments.
 
2017-09-24 11:15:10 PM  

Znuh: Perhaps coloring books are more subby's speed. It's not like trying to read the freaking Silmarillion.


I've been told that it's got all the awesome stories I it but it's like reading the begats books of the Old Testament.
 
2017-09-24 11:15:42 PM  

Uncle Eazy: Anything by Dickens?

/much longer ago than 80 years


Dickens wrote like he was paid by the word.

And he was.
 
2017-09-24 11:16:50 PM  

RoyFokker'sGhost: shroom: I actually just read The Hobbit for the first time on vacation last week.  Having a difficult time understanding how Peter Jackson got 3 movies out this.  Or even 2 for that matter.  I was purposely waiting to watch them until I'd finally gotten around to the book.

Now I have to wonder - is the "I'm a shark, suck my dick" meme based on Smaug?  Because that's what he seems like.  Goes around telling everyone what a fire-breathing badass he is, then gets killed by Some Dude who doesn't even have magic or good weapons.

Jackson did a very piss-poor job with The Hobbit. Bard the Bowman was sort of Aragorn v0.5; descended from kings of old. Also, he had the one place on Smaug's belly that was missing a scale pointed out to him by the thrush. So, it was the 'Luke Skywalker' shot of it's day.


Plus there is the famous line about Black Arrow
 
2017-09-24 11:18:55 PM  
Although I was directly in the LOTR's wheelhouse - shy, nerdy kid, loved Dungeons & Dragons - I couldn't get anywhere with that trilogy. I hated the hobbits. I get that they're anti-heroes, or literally non-heroes, but I hated that. I hated that they futz around for dozens of pages doing nothing and then there's an inn with a bunch of weird hippies. I never got any further.

I keep waiting to try it again in old age, but I didn't even like the movies, which I think are goofy.
 
2017-09-24 11:20:25 PM  
I read that book for the first time about a year ago and did so to my son as a bedtime story. It was quite enjoyable for both of us. Then we watched the LOTR movies. And then he wanted to be Frodo for Halloween that year. I was so proud.
 
2017-09-24 11:22:53 PM  
Bros. Karamazov?
 
2017-09-24 11:27:42 PM  
Mary Shelley's Frankenstein - a lot of it read like a travelogue, like a lot of The Hobbit does.

Still like both books. On The Road I couldn't finish.
 
2017-09-24 11:30:01 PM  

fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"?


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-09-24 11:30:53 PM  
I was raised by super hippies who were obsessed with the Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings. The books were presented to me as if they were the bible, a holy book to be read with reverence. And I went along with it because I was a kid and didn't know any better.

Reading them as an adult, I found them full of interesting but badly executed ideas.

/Never cared about Tom Bombadil
//wanted more Barrow Wights
///three rings for elven kings
 
2017-09-24 11:39:11 PM  

fusillade762: Did anyone try commenting on the "What gynecologists are thinking thread"? I've seen articles get redlit, but I've never seen a comment thread get completely nuked when it had comments in it. Now I'm really curious to know WTF happened.


I'm assuming something went down that showed the mods in a hypocritical light, so they shut the whole thing down?  That tends to be what happens lately.

/This post may self-destruct in 3..2..1....
 
2017-09-24 11:53:33 PM  

Fano: Znuh: Perhaps coloring books are more subby's speed. It's not like trying to read the freaking Silmarillion.

I've been told that it's got all the awesome stories I it but it's like reading the begats books of the Old Testament.


The Old Testament also has all the awesome stories buried in between the begats.  Silmarillion is best understood as an amalgam of interrelated texts (like the OT), so it's not polished or always consistent.  But if you're interested in the history and origin stories of groups you encountered in LOTR, it's indispensable. Also a good source of trading cards.
 
2017-09-25 12:08:10 AM  

Xanadone: Are you sure you're not confusing The Hobbit with The Lord of the Rings, subby?


This. The Hobbit was fine, LOTR was the one that needed an editor.

Also, since we're talking Lord of the Rings now, allow me to once again rant about how Rohan got screwed.  They did most of the heavy lifting in the War of the Ring: won Helm's Deep almost singlehandedly, did the lion's share in Pelennor Fields, and was a major participant in Morannon.  And all that Numenorean elitist Aragorn did was to renew their existing land grant.  He should have given Rohan the whole western kingdom.
 
2017-09-25 12:13:32 AM  
Literally just got into an hour long argument with the girl Im seeing about how Ive never read or seen any of the Hobbit, LotR, or Harry Potter stuff.

Tried to read LotR once in high school and found it tedious. She might break up with me over this and Im ok with that,

/Give me some Starship Troopers or Foundation any day of the week.
 
2017-09-25 12:21:14 AM  

aerojockey: Xanadone: Are you sure you're not confusing The Hobbit with The Lord of the Rings, subby?

This. The Hobbit was fine, LOTR was the one that needed an editor.

Also, since we're talking Lord of the Rings now, allow me to once again rant about how Rohan got screwed.  They did most of the heavy lifting in the War of the Ring: won Helm's Deep almost singlehandedly, did the lion's share in Pelennor Fields, and was a major participant in Morannon.  And all that Numenorean elitist Aragorn did was to renew their existing land grant.  He should have given Rohan the whole western kingdom.


That does not a King make. For instance, Aragorn son of Arathorn, 'asn't got shiat on him.
 
2017-09-25 12:22:31 AM  

evilchode: Literally just got into an hour long argument with the girl Im seeing about how Ive never read or seen any of the Hobbit, LotR, or Harry Potter stuff.

Tried to read LotR once in high school and found it tedious. She might break up with me over this and Im ok with that,

/Give me some Starship Troopers or Foundation any day of the week.


Just as long as you understand sci-fi is a subset of fantasy, just with particular rules.
 
2017-09-25 12:23:24 AM  
In 4th or 5th grade, The Hobbit was the first book I ever checked out of a library on my own.

/A year or two earlier I was one of a few students who got a free book and I picked Phantom Tollbooth
 
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