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(Twitter)   Ken Burns presents the Derp War   ( twitter.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Tweet location history, Twitter, Twitter Developer Agreement, New York Yankees, favorite waifu pillow, Crying, tweet thread, Love  
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7302 clicks; posted to Politics » on 19 Aug 2017 at 10:31 PM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



104 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2017-08-19 06:32:11 PM  
Yes. Oh yes
 
2017-08-19 06:50:51 PM  
LOL
 
2017-08-19 06:53:36 PM  
They need to add a Pulitzer Prize for twitter and give this one immediately!
 
2017-08-19 07:06:02 PM  
That was excellent. Also, how broken does a dude have to be to carry one of those waifu pillows around in public? I mean, I just...

I dunno.
 
2017-08-19 07:07:54 PM  
From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

My Dearest, Tammy-Ann
Youtube I7OVNahZZdY
 
2017-08-19 07:12:54 PM  
Brilliant!!
 
2017-08-19 07:16:36 PM  

blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I7OVNahZZdY - 480x270]


Goddamnit, that's glorious. I have him Farkied as 'funny guy', and he does not disappoint.
 
2017-08-19 07:40:46 PM  
If I should fall on the field of battle, tell my dearest mother that I loved her & that she mustn't look through my browser history.

Awesome.
 
2017-08-19 07:51:18 PM  
totally not a bookmark so I can find it easily when I can watch videos
 
2017-08-19 08:07:26 PM  
I loved the comment about the rations and being limited to 6,000 calories
 
2017-08-19 08:09:00 PM  
Nicely done. Liked the one with the narration added.
 
2017-08-19 08:45:23 PM  
I wonder how Civil War re-enactors feel about these cosplayers?  You know, the type of guys that take the time to make their outfits historically accurate and actually know and could communicate the heritage of the battles they recreate?
 
2017-08-19 09:34:51 PM  

Karac: I wonder how Civil War re-enactors feel about these cosplayers?  You know, the type of guys that take the time to make their outfits historically accurate and actually know and could communicate the heritage of the battles they recreate?


A lot of the re-enactors buy pretty hard into the Lost Cause mythology.
 
2017-08-19 10:32:52 PM  
That's a thing of beauty.  Also, that lady is awesome.
 
2017-08-19 10:37:09 PM  

Poor guy. He was having flashbacks from all the times he would fark up as a kid, and his father would give him two middle fingers to his face as a response. "Learn from your mistakes, son, or this is what the world will keep showing you!"


img.fark.netView Full Size

 
2017-08-19 10:37:29 PM  

blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I7OVNahZZdY - 480x270]


"lost his nethers to the 'beetus."

Holy crap....someone please crowdfund this.  If "Fight Club" can start off as a short story then this needs to become a feature length film.
 
2017-08-19 10:37:46 PM  
I'd like to find the person who came up with Twitters post layout format and punch them in the balls.
 
2017-08-19 10:38:22 PM  

blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[YouTube video]


Much funnier
 
2017-08-19 10:41:24 PM  
Open a new tab, go to YouTube, play "Ashokan Farewell" in the background. Then read.
 
2017-08-19 10:42:01 PM  
I guess that's one way to describe Vietnam.  Less than a month away.

/a real Ken Burns film
 
2017-08-19 10:42:17 PM  

Skarekrough: blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I7OVNahZZdY - 480x270]

"lost his nethers to the 'beetus."

Holy crap....someone please crowdfund this.  If "Fight Club" can start off as a short story then this needs to become a feature length film.


I'd donate to that. Mike Judge should write it.
 
2017-08-19 10:42:36 PM  
Or the last image does exactly that, and I just have Twitter muted.
 
2017-08-19 10:53:01 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-08-19 10:53:24 PM  
What the...
I don't...
the Hell...
 
2017-08-19 10:53:56 PM  
"Mom, make the mean lady go away"
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-08-19 10:57:45 PM  

skinink: Poor guy. He was having flashbacks from all the times he would fark up as a kid, and his father would give him two middle fingers to his face as a response. "Learn from your mistakes, son, or this is what the world will keep showing you!"
[img.fark.net image 850x533]


Sadly, that is the closest he ever got to a woman.
 
2017-08-19 10:57:52 PM  
No idea who that woman is, but I'd like to buy her a beer and shake her hand.
 
2017-08-19 11:00:40 PM  
Honestly I enjoyed the Weenerss, but then hearing them in the style of Ken Burns was just amazing.  Usually you click on these links and it is "meh", this one really was great (although I am sure you have to be old enough to have watched the documentary).
 
2017-08-19 11:01:00 PM  

blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I7OVNahZZdY - 480x270]


The best Ken Burns spoof of all time has to be NASSA, the Negro Space Program:

Documentary film: Black Astronauts & NASSA
Youtube bq7gkQ7UkzI
 
2017-08-19 11:01:07 PM  

The Bunyip: No idea who that woman is, but I'd like to buy her a beer and shake her hand.


Lara Rogers.
 
2017-08-19 11:07:07 PM  
What a typical North Ender, shootin' middle fingers every which way like that.

/wipes tear of joy
 
2017-08-19 11:07:42 PM  
Damn, that is an amazing image.  I don't know if Cpt. Cartman is on some stairs that make him look taller, but the fact that she looks a foot shorter, is half his girth, and he's obviously afraid of an actual confrontation while she isn't, after all the bravado from these confederate KKK WP Nazi farks... is just beautiful.

fark these Nazi/KKK/Confederate/WP/whatever assholes.  Goddamn reprehensible cowards.
 
2017-08-19 11:09:26 PM  
*plays Ashokan Farewell plaintively on fiddle*
 
2017-08-19 11:10:50 PM  

fusillade762: If I should fall on the field of battle, tell my dearest mother that I loved her & that she mustn't look through my browser history.

Awesome.


That's my favorite one.
 
2017-08-19 11:15:32 PM  
You people are easily amused.

/you people.
 
2017-08-19 11:16:30 PM  

cgraves67: fusillade762: If I should fall on the field of battle, tell my dearest mother that I loved her & that she mustn't look through my browser history.

Awesome.

That's my favorite one.


My favorite, too. Funny, but without the discomfort of being amused by fat jokes.
 
2017-08-19 11:34:04 PM  
 NOT how to touch a boobie.
 
2017-08-19 11:37:49 PM  

skinink: Poor guy. He was having flashbacks from all the times he would fark up as a kid, and his father would give him two middle fingers to his face as a response. "Learn from your mistakes, son, or this is what the world will keep showing you!"
[img.fark.net image 850x533]


I'd like to buy her a beer, and that poor fat kid is going to drown his sorrows in a ravaging of ding-dongs (take that as you wish).
 
2017-08-19 11:38:29 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-08-19 11:43:12 PM  

blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I7OVNahZZdY - 480x270]

Please ensure our sons Dale, Earnhardt, Three and Intimidator learn of this day that Freedom died.


Oh my God, pure gold...
 
2017-08-19 11:43:25 PM  
That poor, stupid, delusional bastard is going to get doxxed, sure as shiat.

By Monday, everyone will know his name.

By Tuesday, he'll have no job.

By Wednesday, his few friends will have turned on him and most of his family will have disowned him, all except his dear mother.

On Thursday, realizing he has little money and no prospects for working again this decade, he'll try to sell his sperm, but the sperm bank will turn him away, the employees laughing as he gallumphs out the door. Someone will mimic the Price Is Right sad trombone sound as his feet touch the curb.

On Friday, he'll try to enroll at the local community college, only to find classes have already started. The only course he will be able to take is a Saturday 7:00 AM class - History 221: The Civil War and Reconstruction, taught by Professor Tarkeesha X Shabazz. Dejected, and finding himself in a vipers nest of liberals and race traitors, he'll waddle off campus and take the bus home.

And on Saturday, he will break down, sobbing, lamenting how terrible his life has become in just a single week, all because of the girl with the "digits seen 'round the world." His mother will console him, in the darkness of the basement, whispering softly in his ear, "Shhh... there, there darling... Both sides *are* bad... you had no choice... and her emails... and that black man who dirtied up the White House... of course you had to make a stand... don't worry, the mine will open again soon, you'll see... until then, just stay down here... I'll bring you some Ring Dings and Funyuns. Rest now." The sounds of her footsteps resounding on the boards as she climbs the stairs will drown out her voice as she mutters, "I should have just blown his father..."

And then, his phone will emit the Twitter sound.
And he will once again find himself face to face with...

Her.
 
2017-08-19 11:43:40 PM  

Don't Troll Me Bro!: Damn, that is an amazing image.  I don't know if Cpt. Cartman is on some stairs that make him look taller, but the fact that she looks a foot shorter, is half his girth, and he's obviously afraid of an actual confrontation while she isn't, after all the bravado from these confederate KKK WP Nazi farks... is just beautiful.

fark these Nazi/KKK/Confederate/WP/whatever assholes.  Goddamn reprehensible cowards.


Not even half. I bet she weighs about 1/3rd of what he does and he can't even meet her gaze. She's staring him down and winning.
 
2017-08-19 11:44:14 PM  
I have no idea how to embed tweets/video in Fark...

https://twitter.com/Reetae27/status/899018562647375872
 
2017-08-19 11:44:36 PM  

blastoh: From Four years ago.
Based on a fark comment

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I7OVNahZZdY - 480x270]


That's the very post that I favorited Mr. Coffee Nerves for and one of my favourite posts ever on fark - his farky is still "Ken Burns - Teabaggers".  I came to this thread to make sure that it was represented, good job.
 
2017-08-19 11:51:45 PM  

jdawg3k: I have no idea how to embed tweets/video in Fark...

https://twitter.com/Reetae27/status/899018562647375872


32pm UhlGUqAMDYo
Youtube 7rKrfFQTiJ0
 
2017-08-19 11:54:20 PM  

DemonEater: That's the very post that I favorited Mr. Coffee Nerves for and one of my favourite posts ever on fark - his farky is still "Ken Burns - Teabaggers".  I came to this thread to make sure that it was represented, good job.


That's still one of my all-time favorite posts, right up there with SatanicHamster's "I was at the conception of Strom Thurmond's last child" masterpiece.
 
2017-08-19 11:57:30 PM  
Seems a lot of people were thinking the same thing on this pic
https://twitter.com/dickfundy/status/898987117472174080
 
2017-08-19 11:59:31 PM  

pxlboy: That was excellent. Also, how broken does a dude have to be to carry one of those waifu pillows around in public? I mean, I just...

I dunno.


It's somewhere in Germany, there's a sign for Nordsee, a fast food seafood place, in the background.
 
2017-08-20 12:09:38 AM  

DeadPhelps: That poor, stupid, delusional bastard is going to get doxxed, sure as shiat.

By Monday, everyone will know his name.

By Tuesday, he'll have no job.

By Wednesday, his few friends will have turned on him and most of his family will have disowned him, all except his dear mother.

On Thursday, realizing he has little money and no prospects for working again this decade, he'll try to sell his sperm, but the sperm bank will turn him away, the employees laughing as he gallumphs out the door. Someone will mimic the Price Is Right sad trombone sound as his feet touch the curb.

On Friday, he'll try to enroll at the local community college, only to find classes have already started. The only course he will be able to take is a Saturday 7:00 AM class - History 221: The Civil War and Reconstruction, taught by Professor Tarkeesha X Shabazz. Dejected, and finding himself in a vipers nest of liberals and race traitors, he'll waddle off campus and take the bus home.

And on Saturday, he will break down, sobbing, lamenting how terrible his life has become in just a single week, all because of the girl with the "digits seen 'round the world." His mother will console him, in the darkness of the basement, whispering softly in his ear, "Shhh... there, there darling... Both sides *are* bad... you had no choice... and her emails... and that black man who dirtied up the White House... of course you had to make a stand... don't worry, the mine will open again soon, you'll see... until then, just stay down here... I'll bring you some Ring Dings and Funyuns. Rest now." The sounds of her footsteps resounding on the boards as she climbs the stairs will drown out her voice as she mutters, "I should have just blown his father..."

And then, his phone will emit the Twitter sound.
And he will once again find himself face to face with...

Her.


Even your timeline was too conservative - he's already been doxxed, he's already been kicked out of Pensacola Christian College where he was studying AND working (so two birds with one stone, there), and someone already created a GoFundMe account that got up to ~$2500 before being canceled.

Allen Armentrout
 
2017-08-20 12:10:26 AM  

dv-ous: Karac: I wonder how Civil War re-enactors feel about these cosplayers?  You know, the type of guys that take the time to make their outfits historically accurate and actually know and could communicate the heritage of the battles they recreate?

A lot of the re-enactors buy pretty hard into the Lost Cause mythology.


Ken Burns has some (some) responsibility for the pervasiveness of Lost Cause bullshiat.

Shelby Foote, too.

http://cwmemory.com/2015/08/31/the-split-personality-of-ken-burnss-th​e​-civil-war/

The Lost Cause: When Grown Adults Lack the Character and Humility to Admit They Were Wrong.

Kind of like now and Trump supporters.
 
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