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(Mirror.co.uk)   Britain will soon be facing an onslaught of super-fleas with giant penises. Well... 'giant' relative to Britain, anyway   ( mirror.co.uk) divider line
    More: Creepy, penis two-and-a-half times, ideal breeding conditions, Flea, controllers Basis Prompt, small red spots, British Pest Control, fleas, Bubonic plague  
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3499 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Aug 2017 at 3:03 AM (18 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2017-08-13 03:44:50 AM  
11 votes:

BarkingUnicorn: Is the beginning of summer in the UK?  We're just a bit more than two weeks from it's semi-official ending here in the States.


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2017-08-13 02:20:04 AM  
7 votes:
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2017-08-13 06:38:34 AM  
5 votes:
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2017-08-13 03:48:13 AM  
5 votes:
so 'flea penis' is a compliment? guess i owe my step-mom an apology
2017-08-13 09:48:28 AM  
4 votes:

felching pen: Not British. Probably.
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Said a flea to a fly in a flue,
Said the flea, "oh, what shall we do?"
"Let us fly," said the flea,
"Let us flee," said the fly,
So the flew through a flaw in the flue.
2017-08-13 05:47:42 AM  
4 votes:
If you're going to make fun of the average penis size of another nation, pick a nation that isn't already making fun of our tiny American penises.

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2017-08-13 03:39:41 AM  
4 votes:
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2017-08-13 12:07:14 AM  
3 votes:
Britain has small penises?  This totally explains why their ancestors created a space station the size of a small moon.
2017-08-13 11:45:04 AM  
2 votes:
What my dyslexia got from the headline was "Giant penis fleas"

I like my headline better.
2017-08-13 08:13:08 AM  
2 votes:
I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be making a super-fly joke, or a super-freak joke.
2017-08-13 06:43:37 AM  
2 votes:

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: I Ate Shergar: BarkingUnicorn: Is the beginning of summer in the UK?  We're just a bit more than two weeks from it's semi-official ending here in the States.

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Pssh - internet lies.  Britain is 100% compatible with the shareware version of Summer.  Up to 70% of the temps of regular summer!


And the rain gets warmer, too.
2017-08-13 04:19:03 AM  
2 votes:
Not British. Probably.
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2017-08-13 04:11:45 AM  
2 votes:

I Ate Shergar: BarkingUnicorn: Is the beginning of summer in the UK?  We're just a bit more than two weeks from it's semi-official ending here in the States.

[img.fark.net image 790x591]


Pssh - internet lies.  Britain is 100% compatible with the shareware version of Summer.  Up to 70% of the temps of regular summer!
2017-08-13 11:59:13 AM  
1 vote:
The randy 'super' males are said to pack a penis two-and-a-half times the length of their entire body - the largest genital, relative to size, of any bug on Earth.

Now I feel inadequate. Mine is only half my total body length.
2017-08-13 06:13:06 AM  
1 vote:

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: I Ate Shergar: BarkingUnicorn: Is the beginning of summer in the UK?  We're just a bit more than two weeks from it's semi-official ending here in the States.

[img.fark.net image 790x591]

Pssh - internet lies.  Britain is 100% compatible with the shareware version of Summer.  Up to 70% of the temps of regular summer!


Yeah, but we have to quit and restart summer constantly when we have shareware summer running. Lots of malware too...
2017-08-13 04:27:45 AM  
1 vote:
Flea's penis is still smaller than that sock...
2017-08-13 03:40:40 AM  
1 vote:
Not sure I'm worried about a flea penis, their teeth though- they could do some nasty damage.
2017-08-13 03:33:15 AM  
1 vote:

sex_and_drugs_for_ian: a flea can live 14 days to one year, with the female laying up to 50 eggs a day

.
That doesn't seem like all that many, insect-wise.


It is for a species that doesn't use queens or the like.  Remember, there are rather a lot of female fleas - multiply that X50 - times the amount of females = argh farkin' fleas everywhere.   Usually when you get a bug species that lays a ton of eggs/female it's one that has a pretty small amount of fertile females, or otherwise restricted breeding.  Fleas, unfortunately not so much.  That and their lovely insecticide resistances etc. make for a horde of the little horrors pretty quickly.  About the only thing we ever did that worked seriously in the long term was start spraying the lawn/foliage with nematodes in the spring.  Actually knocked the flea population down and out as long as we kept up with it during their breeding season.

/yes, I'm one of those lucky people that will damn near literally attract every flea in the area fairly instantly
//walked into a house once that had been owned by an old lady with 3 dogs... in about 30 seconds my legs were visibly covered with fleas.  To the point they looked greyish.  Bleah!
///mosquitoes used to love me the same way, fortunately that's toned down a little bit in my old age.  Now I just get bit, not swarmed and bit.  Yay... cough.
2017-08-13 03:09:36 AM  
1 vote:
Yeah which country just elected a fat fascist with a micro-penis as the direct representative of their entire nation again?
2017-08-13 01:13:02 AM  
1 vote:
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