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(The New York Times)   Beach-spreading overtakes man-spreading as the latest Jersey Shore craze   ( nytimes.com) divider line
    More: Stupid, New Jersey, beach, annual family beach, Seaside Heights, POINT PLEASANT BEACH, jersey shore, foldable beach chairs, New Jersey shore  
•       •       •

8935 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Aug 2017 at 4:19 PM (14 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2017-08-12 04:31:59 PM  
29 votes:
I farking hate people that play music at the beach. No one wants to listen to your shiatty reggaeton

Listen to the waves, birds and children laughing like a civil person
2017-08-12 04:41:40 PM  
10 votes:
I stay away from the beach on weekends.   And thank   Jeezus I don't live in Jersey
2017-08-12 04:45:13 PM  
9 votes:
Being from a mountain tribe, I've never gotten 'beach culture'.

Laying around getting skin cancer always seemed to be a waste of time to me.

Doing stuff, not so much.
2017-08-12 04:46:01 PM  
8 votes:
translation: A bunch of whiny entitled douches didn't get to the beach early enough and had to deal with all of the other people there. "OMG! OTHER PEOPLE WANT TO USE THE BEACH AT THE SAME TIME I DO! SOMEBODY SHOULD MAKE A LAW!"
if you want space, don't go to the touristy beaches. if you don't want other people, don't go to the touristy beaches. IF YOU WANT PRIVACY, DON'T GO TO A TOURISTY BEACH! there are 95,000 miles of coastline in the US. if their music is too loud, just move further down. The beach my girl and I go to is a state park around 16 miles from the big tourist beach nearby. it's never that crowded, the people are nice, and you don't have to deal with the bullshiat. "waaaahhhhhh, I'm on myrtle beach on july 4th and there are OTHER PEOPLE HERE!!!!!". plan better next time, asshole.
2017-08-12 04:51:37 PM  
7 votes:

Ow! That was my feelings!: Being from a mountain tribe, I've never gotten 'beach culture'.

Laying around getting skin cancer always seemed to be a waste of time to me.

Doing stuff, not so much.


Seriously. You pack up all your shiat, fight traffic and head to the beach already clogged with humanity..

And just lay there.

And that is 'relaxing' to you?

Ok. To each his own.
2017-08-12 06:16:35 PM  
6 votes:

RJReves: nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.

You got offended by a Christie joke?


it's pretty lowbrow, bud.  You want to attack the guy attack his character not his physical appearance.  It's not like he hasn't done enough shady sleazy shiat.  And no, before someone comes in here calling me alt-right saying I'm defending a republican I say the same thing about anyone.  Attack their character not their physical appearance.
2017-08-12 05:52:34 PM  
5 votes:
Hey, this is what Americans want. They want to compete with each other at every possible social level, whether it's "my kid's dressed better than your kid at school" or "my beach toys are bigger and more garish than your beach toys" or "my truck's bigger and louder than your truck" and so on. They want to ignore social niceties like taking into consideration other people, or keeping the noise down to a reasonable level, or not blowing hookah smoke over half the beach, or not getting drunk and picking fights, or not setting up huge goddamned pavilions like they're Tudors vacationing on the Thames. They want to ignore authority and tell anyone who complains to "fark off," because they're loud, they're proud, and they're assholes. They have to be managed like farm animals, because if cops take their eyes off them, they're picking fights, pissing on the boardwalk, stealing shiat from each other, getting injured on the rocks, and drowning in the water.
They're the same folks that complain when the beach is covered in trash, broken glass, cigarette butts, and drug paraphernalia. They're the same folks that wonder why their taxes keep going up to cover the damage they do and the supervision they require. They're the same folks that make the tourists uneasy, then wonder why tourists don't want to show up any more. They're mystified when they discover that Jersey Shore town populations have been steadily shrinking for the last decade - some by 30% or more - because no one wants to live next to loud, obnoxious assholes happy to ruin their farking neighborhood because, hey, they don't live here and it's your job to pay for their assholiness.
2017-08-12 04:58:14 PM  
4 votes:

RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]


Oh man, fat people are so funny.
2017-08-12 06:47:26 PM  
3 votes:

RJReves: Plant Rights Activist: RJReves: nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.

You got offended by a Christie joke?

it's pretty lowbrow, bud.  You want to attack the guy attack his character not his physical appearance.  It's not like he hasn't done enough shady sleazy shiat.  And no, before someone comes in here calling me alt-right saying I'm defending a republican I say the same thing about anyone.  Attack their character not their physical appearance.

In case you didn't realize it: that cartoon was lampooning his 4th of July shiatheel activities.


By calling him a whale.

Also, in case you didn't realize it...

I DIDN'T DRAW THE GODDAM CARTOON!


"If I retweet something that doesn't mean I endorse it!!!!"
2017-08-12 05:54:15 PM  
3 votes:

FormlessOne: Hey, this is what Americans want. They want to compete with each other at every possible social level, whether it's "my kid's dressed better than your kid at school" or "my beach toys are bigger and more garish than your beach toys" or "my truck's bigger and louder than your truck" and so on. They want to ignore social niceties like taking into consideration other people, or keeping the noise down to a reasonable level, or not blowing hookah smoke over half the beach, or not getting drunk and picking fights, or not setting up huge goddamned pavilions like they're Tudors vacationing on the Thames. They want to ignore authority and tell anyone who complains to "fark off," because they're loud, they're proud, and they're assholes. They have to be managed like farm animals, because if cops take their eyes off them, they're picking fights, pissing on the boardwalk, stealing shiat from each other, getting injured on the rocks, and drowning in the water.
They're the same folks that complain when the beach is covered in trash, broken glass, cigarette butts, and drug paraphernalia. They're the same folks that wonder why their taxes keep going up to cover the damage they do and the supervision they require. They're the same folks that make the tourists uneasy, then wonder why tourists don't want to show up any more. They're mystified when they discover that Jersey Shore town populations have been steadily shrinking for the last decade - some by 30% or more - because no one wants to live next to loud, obnoxious assholes happy to ruin their farking neighborhood because, hey, they don't live here and it's your job to pay for their assholiness.


You really need to get out more.  Maybe actually interact with other humans directly.
2017-08-12 05:30:51 PM  
3 votes:
These guys are pros. They practice all winter with chair-saving parking place, which is a gateway drug. Sad little lives, going "down the shore" for a day in the frickin' sun at a washed out crowded beach. The entire neighborhood travels together. So the parking space guard chair to keep the neighbor away -- it's the same neighbor who's at the shore, too, vying for more space.


img.fark.netView Full Size
img.fark.netView Full Size
img.fark.netView Full Size
2017-08-12 05:13:00 PM  
3 votes:

Dead for Tax Reasons: Ow! That was my feelings!: Being from a mountain tribe, I've never gotten 'beach culture'.

Laying around getting skin cancer always seemed to be a waste of time to me.

Doing stuff, not so much.

people in the mountains seem to like hunting and fishing.  that seems excruciatingly boring to me.  to each their own


I like to fish at the beach.  I'm not sure whose side I'm on.
2017-08-12 05:05:08 PM  
3 votes:

Watubi: Meh, I bring a small canopy to the beach now, shades two comfortably.  I remember when I could spend the entire day at the beach with one application of spf 4 sunscreen and not get any change in color.  Nowadays, I'll get red just walking from the car to the beach.


My wife's family goes to the Jersey shore every summer and I guess we're part of the problem. There are 10 of us, all but my SIL of pasty Irish extraction. If we all go to the beach together we end up with five umbrellas lined up across the beach.

No music though. Only douchebags blast their music on the beach.
2017-08-12 04:58:45 PM  
3 votes:

The_Original_Roxtar: translation: A bunch of whiny entitled douches didn't get to the beach early enough and had to deal with all of the other people there. "OMG! OTHER PEOPLE WANT TO USE THE BEACH AT THE SAME TIME I DO! SOMEBODY SHOULD MAKE A LAW!"
if you want space, don't go to the touristy beaches. if you don't want other people, don't go to the touristy beaches. IF YOU WANT PRIVACY, DON'T GO TO A TOURISTY BEACH! there are 95,000 miles of coastline in the US. if their music is too loud, just move further down. The beach my girl and I go to is a state park around 16 miles from the big tourist beach nearby. it's never that crowded, the people are nice, and you don't have to deal with the bullshiat. "waaaahhhhhh, I'm on myrtle beach on july 4th and there are OTHER PEOPLE HERE!!!!!". plan better next time, asshole.


That's not what the article was about at all

Enjoy arguing with the strawman in your head though
2017-08-12 07:46:38 PM  
2 votes:

Shazam999: FormlessOne: Hey, this is what Americans want. They want to compete with each other at every possible social level, whether it's "my kid's dressed better than your kid at school" or "my beach toys are bigger and more garish than your beach toys" or "my truck's bigger and louder than your truck" and so on. They want to ignore social niceties like taking into consideration other people, or keeping the noise down to a reasonable level, or not blowing hookah smoke over half the beach, or not getting drunk and picking fights, or not setting up huge goddamned pavilions like they're Tudors vacationing on the Thames. They want to ignore authority and tell anyone who complains to "fark off," because they're loud, they're proud, and they're assholes. They have to be managed like farm animals, because if cops take their eyes off them, they're picking fights, pissing on the boardwalk, stealing shiat from each other, getting injured on the rocks, and drowning in the water.
They're the same folks that complain when the beach is covered in trash, broken glass, cigarette butts, and drug paraphernalia. They're the same folks that wonder why their taxes keep going up to cover the damage they do and the supervision they require. They're the same folks that make the tourists uneasy, then wonder why tourists don't want to show up any more. They're mystified when they discover that Jersey Shore town populations have been steadily shrinking for the last decade - some by 30% or more - because no one wants to live next to loud, obnoxious assholes happy to ruin their farking neighborhood because, hey, they don't live here and it's your job to pay for their assholiness.

You really need to get out more.  Maybe actually interact with other humans directly.


Speaking for other humans everywhere, no thanks, they can stay at home.
2017-08-12 06:40:36 PM  
2 votes:

Plant Rights Activist: RJReves: nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.

You got offended by a Christie joke?

it's pretty lowbrow, bud.  You want to attack the guy attack his character not his physical appearance.  It's not like he hasn't done enough shady sleazy shiat.  And no, before someone comes in here calling me alt-right saying I'm defending a republican I say the same thing about anyone.  Attack their character not their physical appearance.


In case you didn't realize it: that cartoon was lampooning his 4th of July shiatheel activities.

Also, in case you didn't realize it...

I DIDN'T DRAW THE GODDAM CARTOON!
2017-08-12 05:32:12 PM  
2 votes:
Decades of IT'S THE SUN EVERYBODY PANIC BECAUSE DEATH BY MELANOMA IS COMING FOR YOUR CHILDREN, and now that people take the advice to heart and bring a bit of shelter, in addition to slathering their kids with so much sunscreen they look like ears of Mexican street corn...they're the bad guys?

Okay.
2017-08-12 05:32:07 PM  
2 votes:

nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.


You got offended by a Christie joke?
2017-08-12 05:09:59 PM  
2 votes:

Ow! That was my feelings!: Being from a mountain tribe, I've never gotten 'beach culture'.

Laying around getting skin cancer always seemed to be a waste of time to me.

Doing stuff, not so much.


people in the mountains seem to like hunting and fishing.  that seems excruciatingly boring to me.  to each their own
2017-08-12 05:05:08 PM  
2 votes:
Meh.  It's one thing if two people try to set up a ranch house on the beach, but this appeared to be several dozen people, doing it for one day a year.  Do Not Care.
2017-08-12 02:35:41 PM  
2 votes:
Is this a Chris Christie thread?
2017-08-13 11:18:14 AM  
1 vote:

Plant Rights Activist: RJReves: nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.

You got offended by a Christie joke?

it's pretty lowbrow, bud.  You want to attack the guy attack his character not his physical appearance.  It's not like he hasn't done enough shady sleazy shiat.  And no, before someone comes in here calling me alt-right saying I'm defending a republican I say the same thing about anyone.  Attack their character not their physical appearance.


His physical appearance is part of his character. His character doesn't have the self control to put a fork down. His character has the audacity to claim "pot smokers" have no self control and are drug addicts. Who's the one with the real addiction? Pot smokers or this fat fark who can't stop eating.

BTW, you sound farking fat.
2017-08-13 02:34:15 AM  
1 vote:

RJReves: nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.

You got offended by a Christie joke?


Sounds fat.
2017-08-13 12:15:24 AM  
1 vote:
img.fark.netView Full Size

They got it wrong. GTLB..Gym Tan Laundry Beating
2017-08-12 11:21:52 PM  
1 vote:

Plant Rights Activist: RJReves: nicoffeine: RJReves: WickerNipple: Is this a Chris Christie thread?

[image.cagle.com image 850x490]

Oh man, fat people are so funny.

You got offended by a Christie joke?

it's pretty lowbrow, bud.  You want to attack the guy attack his character not his physical appearance.  It's not like he hasn't done enough shady sleazy shiat.  And no, before someone comes in here calling me alt-right saying I'm defending a republican I say the same thing about anyone.  Attack their character not their physical appearance.


It is perfectly acceptable to do both, which is what that cartoon did.
2017-08-12 09:20:46 PM  
1 vote:

smunns: Is it a law in Jersey to get a trashy tattoo? Can't the photographer take pictures of normal people at the beach and not the extras from weeds?


It's even worse in the South.
2017-08-12 07:36:08 PM  
1 vote:

Shazam999: FormlessOne: Hey, this is what Americans want. They want to compete with each other at every possible social level, whether it's "my kid's dressed better than your kid at school" or "my beach toys are bigger and more garish than your beach toys" or "my truck's bigger and louder than your truck" and so on. They want to ignore social niceties like taking into consideration other people, or keeping the noise down to a reasonable level, or not blowing hookah smoke over half the beach, or not getting drunk and picking fights, or not setting up huge goddamned pavilions like they're Tudors vacationing on the Thames. They want to ignore authority and tell anyone who complains to "fark off," because they're loud, they're proud, and they're assholes. They have to be managed like farm animals, because if cops take their eyes off them, they're picking fights, pissing on the boardwalk, stealing shiat from each other, getting injured on the rocks, and drowning in the water.
They're the same folks that complain when the beach is covered in trash, broken glass, cigarette butts, and drug paraphernalia. They're the same folks that wonder why their taxes keep going up to cover the damage they do and the supervision they require. They're the same folks that make the tourists uneasy, then wonder why tourists don't want to show up any more. They're mystified when they discover that Jersey Shore town populations have been steadily shrinking for the last decade - some by 30% or more - because no one wants to live next to loud, obnoxious assholes happy to ruin their farking neighborhood because, hey, they don't live here and it's your job to pay for their assholiness.

You really need to get out more.  Maybe actually interact with other humans directly.


I am actually against him doing this. I do not want to interact with him.
2017-08-12 05:27:14 PM  
1 vote:

Ow! That was my feelings!: Ow! That was my feelings!: Being from a mountain tribe, I've never gotten 'beach culture'.

Laying around getting skin cancer always seemed to be a waste of time to me.

Doing stuff, not so much.

Seriously. You pack up all your shiat, fight traffic and head to the beach already clogged with humanity..

And just lay there.

And that is 'relaxing' to you?

Ok. To each his own.


90% 0f us blacks agree. If I'm near a body of water just sitting there, it would be a rod and reel in my hands.
/I had a Polish ex who asked me "Why don't you come to the beach and tan with me?"
//I gave her a look that could crush a diamond
2017-08-12 05:26:24 PM  
1 vote:
a.spirited.mediaView Full Size

/ next time just rent a dumpster
2017-08-12 05:11:17 PM  
1 vote:
Is it a law in Jersey to get a trashy tattoo? Can't the photographer take pictures of normal people at the beach and not the extras from weeds?
2017-08-12 05:02:06 PM  
1 vote:

nicoffeine: People are enjoying themselves. Call the police.


Don't sit so
Don't sit so
Don't sit so close to me
2017-08-12 04:56:41 PM  
1 vote:
required items to go to the beach:  towel

optional items:  bottle of water

but then again i am there for the sun and the water, not to bring all the amenities of home along with me

it is the jersey shore, so it is to be expected at a lot of the beaches.  just got to go to some of the less popular ones
2017-08-12 04:48:18 PM  
1 vote:
The Dead Milkmen - Beach Song
Youtube 6KIVbsnW0is
 
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