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(Some Guy)   How to behave like an American, a short illustrated guide for the rest of the world   (modernhumorist.com) divider line 319
    More: Satire  
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11522 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jan 2002 at 12:28 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



319 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2002-01-11 12:29:20 AM
Heheh.
 
2002-01-11 12:29:41 AM
OK, I concede. That was good comedy. But still, it's not a photoshop, now is it?
 
2002-01-11 12:30:18 AM
man that sucks why didn't people let me know that the sensors change certain words you write
 
2002-01-11 12:30:26 AM
No sir, it is not.
 
43%
2002-01-11 12:30:37 AM
BOO, i have already seen this. enjoy,newBIES
 
43%
2002-01-11 12:30:57 AM
i am stupid.
 
2002-01-11 12:31:33 AM
Ok, even Americans will have a good laugh at this one.
 
2002-01-11 12:31:38 AM
agreed
 
2002-01-11 12:32:21 AM
I haven't read this yet but I'm pretty sure it involves lots of lawyers.
 
2002-01-11 12:32:21 AM
damn straight
 
2002-01-11 12:32:57 AM
Spiced meat wands...
 
2002-01-11 12:33:14 AM
crap, I've seen this.
 
2002-01-11 12:33:32 AM
Monroeski: If they didn't, they wouldn't be called "censors." They'd be called "guys."
 
2002-01-11 12:34:29 AM
Pretty funny stuff there.
 
2002-01-11 12:34:53 AM
its funny cause its true
 
2002-01-11 12:36:05 AM
America's sex industry is the biggest and best in the world. As Americans like to say, "Bite it, Sweden!"

Dude, where's my car?
 
2002-01-11 12:37:03 AM
Heh heh. The Swedes make a car called a Vulva.
 
2002-01-11 12:37:15 AM
OOOH OOOOOH RENDEZ-VIEW IS ON!!!!!!!!!
 
2002-01-11 12:37:51 AM
"Many large cities have "fifties"-themed diners, where you can be transported back in time to a more innocent era where hamburgers cost nine dollars."
 
2002-01-11 12:39:29 AM
hehe, not a bad summary of the good OL USA
 
2002-01-11 12:40:10 AM
I will not be satisfied until everyone has a screen name that ends in 'ski'.
 
2002-01-11 12:41:08 AM
Ok, Korzeniowski...have you ever seen the movie Hooper? The name from that movie will be mine
 
2002-01-11 12:41:17 AM



Oh, it's not another america-bashing thing, either.
 
2002-01-11 12:43:11 AM
GirlyGirl, wow new pic, maybe you aren't a man ;)
 
2002-01-11 12:44:45 AM
Best damn country on the planet!
 
2002-01-11 12:45:43 AM
Hmm. She is rather attractive, if that's really her. You can never be sure in the internot.
 
2002-01-11 12:45:45 AM
RageX: I ain't buying it until she explains how her previous pic pulled a RedX a few days ago, and why the pic is hosted by a network hardware reseller.
 
2002-01-11 12:46:06 AM
Hmm...not really funny. The fifties-diner thing made me laugh, so did the TV lingo translation. But the rest was just American stereotype stuff. I've heard that all before, it is old and only maybe 10% accurate. If this was written by an American about another country (say, Canada or Britain), it would be all "ignorant Americans" comments in here.

Was this page written by an American or is it from some other country?
 
2002-01-11 12:47:22 AM
Well I've always been told my standards are low but based on two photos I'll believe she is an attractive girl.
 
2002-01-11 12:48:24 AM
GirlyGirl: You make me wish I was straight.
 
2002-01-11 12:52:10 AM
Why did they focus on Minnesota?
 
2002-01-11 12:53:27 AM
hey, don't forget to read the other chapters! There's a link at the very bottom.
 
2002-01-11 12:54:53 AM
Please Hytes Xian could you stop bringing up your homo'ness? I mean I cant really ogle over good looking girls when I know your sitting there at your comp waiting for the next "weeners" link so you can drool over potential poop shoot stuffers.
 
2002-01-11 12:55:04 AM
Jebediah, ModernHumorist is an American organization. It looks like they're based in New York.

farking ignorant Americans! (myself included)
 
2002-01-11 12:56:03 AM
yeah I guess there's some books out on philadelphiasomethingerother too. I just went to check it out.
 
2002-01-11 12:56:21 AM
Freak is a closet case. You probably look through porn sites hoping to see gay sex banners.
 
2002-01-11 12:57:55 AM
lol Hytes Xian the fisrt time i have heard that one :)

and MOJO the reason it is hosted by a network hardware reseller is because that is what i do. that is my Business,
need a used router by chance? :P
 
2002-01-11 12:59:30 AM
Its funny 'cause its true!
 
2002-01-11 01:00:59 AM
Spiffy, she's a potential nerd, too. The world needs more hot female nerds, because it would make sitting through those Computer Science lectures oh so much easier.
 
2002-01-11 01:03:56 AM
Think about what it's like for me, Freak.
 
2002-01-11 01:04:00 AM
If Americans can't poke fun of themselves using good old fashioned sarcasm then I give up. Hilarious.
 
2002-01-11 01:06:46 AM
Its really funny how your natural defense mechanism is to accuse me of being a closet case, thereby using homo'ness as an insult. If I were making fun of you I wouldn't call you a hetero pretending to be a homo, I would call you a homo.
 
2002-01-11 01:07:12 AM
01-11-02 12:30:37 AM 43%
BOO, i have already seen this. enjoy,newBIES


How thoughtful. Thanks.
 
2002-01-11 01:09:57 AM
I dont have anything against you Hytes Xian and I would rather avoid a flame war if I could since I know I would be the one who ended up being banned or whatever. I just snapped after seeing countless coments from you in various threads exclaiming on how this or that guy was hot. Just as you are secure in your homo-sexuality I'm very secure in my hetero-sexuality. I dont have any need to look at gay-porn, I find regular donkey porn enough of a turn on thank you. So dont accuse me of being a "closet case".
 
2002-01-11 01:11:28 AM
you guys would argue with signposts.
 
2002-01-11 01:11:30 AM
Freak, I'm not sure if I went over your head, but I was saying you're homosexual, and trying desperately to appear heterosexual.

Whatever floats your boat man, it's nobody's business but your own.

I've found that the most militant anti-gay people I know are basing their opinions on a bit of their own "sexual confusion."
 
2002-01-11 01:12:35 AM
nevermind, Freak. I misunderstood your earlier comment, and needn't biatch at you.
 
2002-01-11 01:15:01 AM
Damn, now I really need to apologize to Hytes Xian, my above comment in response to the "closet homo" attack was addressed to b>Holmes, I just wrote the wrong name for some reason.
 
2002-01-11 01:16:03 AM
I'm straight, freak -- not that it matters anyway

i'm getting away from fark now
 
2002-01-11 01:17:02 AM
Sheesh, haven't I made this point already Holmes? I would just love to see you march into a KKK meeting and tell them to hold hands and explore their sexuality. If someones opposed to Homosexuality, which I am not necessarily, it doesn't mean that they are "confused".
 
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