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(CBC)   Sad: wedding cancelled. Bad: Hotel refuses to refund reception payment. Spiffy: Bride decides to donate food from reception to homeless. All $30,000 worth   ( cbc.ca) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Homelessness, Wedding reception, Wedding, Cummins, Homeless shelter, White wedding, Humanitarian aid, Saint Francis House  
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6000 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jul 2017 at 3:42 PM (13 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-07-16 12:47:17 PM  
I'm certain the father of the bride isn't using this as a charitable deduction on his taxes,
 
2017-07-16 01:22:44 PM  
Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.
 
2017-07-16 01:36:33 PM  

vudukungfu: I'm certain the father of the bride isn't using this as a charitable deduction on his taxes,


Seems the ex-groom was paying for most of it. Worse ways to save the surely fuming family of your ex-bride from losing face and for everyone to get at least some of their money back.

Let's face it---weddings that make Fark rarely end even this well.
 
2017-07-16 01:57:03 PM  

FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.


Well, from the way I read it, the catering is provided by the Ritz Charles (the wedding venue). I doubt the $30K is just food, but also the venue fees as well. At that point, it's not too crazy, especially with 170 guests.
 
2017-07-16 03:46:50 PM  
As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.
 
2017-07-16 03:47:54 PM  

MikeyFuccon: vudukungfu: I'm certain the father of the bride isn't using this as a charitable deduction on his taxes,

Seems the ex-groom was paying for most of it. Worse ways to save the surely fuming family of your ex-bride from losing face and for everyone to get at least some of their money back.

Let's face it---weddings that make Fark rarely end even this well.


Cheaper than a divorce?
 
2017-07-16 03:48:38 PM  

TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.


Why are you assuming she was at fault?
 
2017-07-16 03:49:46 PM  

TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.


My takeaway was that the groom called it off.  Or did something so bozo that she had to call it off.  Either way she's very attractive and has a good career ahead of her, she'll be fine.
 
2017-07-16 03:49:47 PM  

RexTalionis: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

Well, from the way I read it, the catering is provided by the Ritz Charles (the wedding venue). I doubt the $30K is just food, but also the venue fees as well. At that point, it's not too crazy, especially with 170 guests.


And inviting a bunch of homeless people sends a big "FU"  to the Ritz Charles for not making accommodations to the jilted bride.
 
2017-07-16 03:49:58 PM  
I'm sure it was an accidental "Fark You" that she filled up their ritzy joint with the homeless...
 
2017-07-16 03:50:28 PM  

phalamir: TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.

Why are you assuming she was at fault?


I'm not.
 
2017-07-16 03:54:52 PM  
The bride not to be says she's not sure what to do with the wedding dress, that it's too painful to contemplate. I suggest she goes all the way and auction it for charity once she feels better.

Peoples would save a lot of money and aggravation if they reserved the big party for the 25 years anniversary.
 
2017-07-16 03:55:40 PM  
He got off light.
 
2017-07-16 03:55:57 PM  

FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.


I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).
 
2017-07-16 03:56:35 PM  
This is touching. Look at those underfed people!
 
2017-07-16 03:56:50 PM  

FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.


Especially mass-produced wedding food. All made ahead of time and sitting in chafing dishes until it's time to serve. It's essentially buffet / cafeteria food.
 
2017-07-16 03:57:38 PM  
Wedding called off when he found out how much she was spending on it.  $30k just for the reception food?
 
2017-07-16 04:00:53 PM  

phalamir: TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.

Why are you assuming she was at fault?


I don't see anything in Freakshow's post indicating she was at "fault" - just a question about what happened. From the article, it seemed like a mutual decision. FTA "she and her fiancé called off the wedding a week ago. She declined to give a reason " Maybe they realized that getting a divorce a year after getting married was more expensive than cancelling the wedding and forfeiting the payment.

That said, weddings can be a horribly expensive procedure. Keep it simple, people. A couple grand (or less, if you're willing to do a little prep work) for food and booze, and a ceremony in the backyard with a Justice of the Peace should cover it. It's a day, a beginning, not your life. Save your money.
 
2017-07-16 04:03:14 PM  

TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.


Local news here in Indy reported as "she called it off for reasons she didnt care to discuss".  He probably cheated on her.
 
2017-07-16 04:04:45 PM  

TravelingFreakshow: phalamir: TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.

Why are you assuming she was at fault?

I'm not.


You're just saying that since her wedding was called off, she has have some flaw that makes her unable to do a good act.  Because, otherwise your statement makes no sense whatsoever.  She could have been at fault, true.  But so could the fiance.  Or neither of them.  And even if she were catting about with half of Indiana, it still wouldn't have any bearing on her generosity.
 
2017-07-16 04:04:57 PM  

Unobtanium: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).


Do people not know they can get married at the courthouse with no fanfare, party, or gigantic life-crushing bill?
 
2017-07-16 04:07:55 PM  

Unobtanium: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).


=============================================================

Most weddings are about $30-$40 a head, which is still crazy, but understandable.

This is $175 a head.  That's insanity.

/If I can ever find a woman and I get married... I'll cook food (probably, say, Chicken and Pasta) myself, rent a giant white tent thingy from a family friend, and host the damn thing in my backyard.
//If the wife even thinks about wanting a $30000 reception, I'll call the wedding off and marry someone else.  For a couple hour event, it's stupid.
 
2017-07-16 04:07:56 PM  
Carmel loves big weddings.
 
2017-07-16 04:08:36 PM  

VerifiedPoster: RexTalionis: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

Well, from the way I read it, the catering is provided by the Ritz Charles (the wedding venue). I doubt the $30K is just food, but also the venue fees as well. At that point, it's not too crazy, especially with 170 guests.

And inviting a bunch of homeless people sends a big "FU"  to the Ritz Charles for not making accommodations to the jilted bride.


I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised if this was the prime motivation.  Less, a nice charitable event than, a "u no give my money back?! I flood you with poors!"

I can't imagine the hotel cared one way or another.  The homeless folks were probably less annoying, whiny and destructive than the average wedding guest.
 
2017-07-16 04:10:03 PM  

AquaTatanka: TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.

Local news here in Indy reported as "she called it off for reasons she didnt care to discuss".  He probably cheated on her.


Lucky bastard.   Her pharmacy degree puts her in a risk category that has more than an 80% chance of her initiating divorce later.

He got better sex and avoided the total financial and emotional destruction of family court.   Good on him.
 
2017-07-16 04:10:22 PM  

Monkey: phalamir: TravelingFreakshow: As much as I like this, the cynic in me wonders how an obviously generous person had their wedding called off.

Why are you assuming she was at fault?

I don't see anything in Freakshow's post indicating she was at "fault" - just a question about what happened. From the article, it seemed like a mutual decision. FTA "she and her fiancé called off the wedding a week ago. She declined to give a reason " Maybe they realized that getting a divorce a year after getting married was more expensive than cancelling the wedding and forfeiting the payment.

That said, weddings can be a horribly expensive procedure. Keep it simple, people. A couple grand (or less, if you're willing to do a little prep work) for food and booze, and a ceremony in the backyard with a Justice of the Peace should cover it. It's a day, a beginning, not your life. Save your money.


The statement juxtaposed generosity with marriageability .  If X could not get married, how could X be generous?  Or, alternately, if X is generous, then X should not be involved in a failed wedding.  Her generosity and her marriageability are not linked traits.  If I said "I am cynical how someone who is a redhead cannot have a drivers license", it would have the same causal relationship.
 
2017-07-16 04:11:43 PM  
I should go into wedding planning. People will pay anything.
 
2017-07-16 04:13:31 PM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: I should go into wedding planning. People will pay anything.


Women will pay for anything, and thus drive the consumer economy.
 
2017-07-16 04:17:04 PM  
could you imagine the kind of Fark party we could have for 30k
 
2017-07-16 04:17:41 PM  
 
2017-07-16 04:18:23 PM  
Some people have the conversation late where they realize they're not marrying for the right reasons. Some people are that mature, believe it or not.


/and they be thinkin they better 'n yall
 
2017-07-16 04:21:35 PM  

The Googles Do Nothing: Carmel loves big weddings.


Carmel loves Carmel.  Carmelites are some of the biggest assholes in this state.

/least considerate drivers
 
2017-07-16 04:22:10 PM  

AquaTatanka: Unobtanium: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).

Do people not know they can get married at the courthouse with no fanfare, party, or gigantic life-crushing bill?


Mainline social thought seems to be that weddings as an ostentatious display of wealth is the norm. I've heard stories from people who had courthouse weddings whose families were livid that they were "denied" the pomp and fanfare of an extravaganza.

Seems like a social ill to me, taking the legal stamp for socially acceptable cohabitation and using it to flaunt one's status.
 
2017-07-16 04:23:45 PM  
"Let them eat [wedding] cake."
 
2017-07-16 04:24:18 PM  

karlandtanya: Can't believe nobody's posted this one yet

"8"Then he said to his servants, 'The wedding banquet is ready, but those I invited did not deserve to come. 9So go to the street corners and invite to the banquet anyone you find.' 10So the servants went out into the streets and gathered all the people they could find, the bad as well as the good, and the wedding hall was filled with guests."

Unfortunately it only works out of context, it's actually pretty terrible if you read the whole thing.


Some bridezillas do seem to act with the wrath of old testament Jehovah when they are pressed.
 
2017-07-16 04:28:41 PM  

karlandtanya: Can't believe nobody's posted this one yet

"8"Then he said to his servants, 'The wedding banquet is ready, but those I invited did not deserve to come. 9So go to the street corners and invite to the banquet anyone you find.' 10So the servants went out into the streets and gathered all the people they could find, the bad as well as the good, and the wedding hall was filled with guests."

Unfortunately it only works out of context, it's actually pretty terrible if you read the whole thing.


Do you mean the whole parable or the whole bible?

Used to read the bible all the time.

/until I was miraculously healed of my faith.
// not sure who to thank
 
2017-07-16 04:29:45 PM  

Pope Poutrage VI: This is touching. Look at those underfed people!


i.imgur.com
 
2017-07-16 04:31:34 PM  

ifky: could you imagine the kind of Fark party we could have for 30k


img.fark.net
 
2017-07-16 04:34:58 PM  

VerifiedPoster: RexTalionis: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

Well, from the way I read it, the catering is provided by the Ritz Charles (the wedding venue). I doubt the $30K is just food, but also the venue fees as well. At that point, it's not too crazy, especially with 170 guests.

And inviting a bunch of homeless people sends a big "FU"  to the Ritz Charles for not making accommodations to the jilted bride.


That's my takeaway as well. If she wanted to take the food to others, homeless or not, that's one thing. To bring people there, when the Ritz Charles did no wrong in this situation, is a malicious gesture. The couple made the arrangements, they knew if it was a pay or play deal.
 
2017-07-16 04:35:03 PM  

Notorious C.A.W.: AquaTatanka: Unobtanium: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).

Do people not know they can get married at the courthouse with no fanfare, party, or gigantic life-crushing bill?

Mainline social thought seems to be that weddings as an ostentatious display of wealth is the norm. I've heard stories from people who had courthouse weddings whose families were livid that they were "denied" the pomp and fanfare of an extravaganza.

Seems like a social ill to me, taking the legal stamp for socially acceptable cohabitation and using it to flaunt one's status.


For socially acceptable cohabitation purposes, you can make it what you want it.  It can be a religious deal like the Catholic ceremony, that's actually joining the couple, to the community, to god.  It can be a party.  It can be a flaunting.  It can be about exchanging goats.

Even the legal stamp is a bit silly, requiring a Justice of the Peace and a goofy ceremony.  Seems like if you want the legal benefits of marriage, you should be able to fill in the paperwork and leave it at that.
 
2017-07-16 04:36:19 PM  
One of the rare good things GOT has given us.
 
2017-07-16 04:40:05 PM  
If the homeless folks get to keep the outfits that will be way better than a meal, a nice or even just not awful sports jacket and tie has gotten a lot of men I know a job and I am assuming a decent dress works the same for women.

/I donate my old but good stuff to a local group that helps vets
//My wife does the same
///I like to think that the pants I am too fat for can help someone get a job
 
2017-07-16 04:47:32 PM  
Give the homeless a wedding reception meal, they eat for a day

Teach them to cook a wedding reception meal, they eat for a lifetime.
 
2017-07-16 04:51:48 PM  
Anti Coulter.
 
2017-07-16 04:53:58 PM  

AquaTatanka: Do people not know they can get married at the courthouse with no fanfare, party, or gigantic life-crushing bill?


It's a syndrome. I think they know, but the idea seems to be to have an extravagant party. I've been to several weddings of friend's or family's kids in the last several years. Most of them have some kind of "blowout" aspect to them, I think only one didn't have a plated dinner reception... well, two, if you count the cosplay wedding with local BBQ food in a local "community center" Most had an open bar, too. 

jake3988: =============================================================

Most weddings are about $30-$40 a head, which is still crazy, but understandable.

This is $175 a head.  That's insanity.


Yeah, I agree that $175 a head is outrageous. A plated dinner in a "fancy" steakhouse can be had for under $100 a head (I know, I just arranged one last month for a work event).
 
2017-07-16 04:57:34 PM  
Cummins had booked for the reception in Carmel

Gee, nobody could have predicted this wouldn't work out.

img.fark.netimg.fark.net
 
2017-07-16 05:06:32 PM  

Unobtanium: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).


Place I booked was a plated, sit-down meal. $37 per person after tax and tip. Minimum seating 40. Open bar was extra, didn't bother. We paid a deposit of a couple hundred bucks, none of this "all up front and no refund" crap. Restaurant banquet room. Had a stage, so we hired a band for a couple hundred bucks.

It was really nice of her, but that $30,000 could have funded 3 apartments for those people for a year instead of one meal for 170 of them. That venue is farking evil.
 
2017-07-16 05:08:33 PM  

jake3988: Unobtanium: FlyingLizardOfDoom: Seven bridesmaids? Isn't that a bit excessive?  And who pays 30k for food? The wedding must have cost the same as a house.

I haven't priced weddings lately, but back when we got married, wedding venues had one of two pricing models: (1) a line-item charge for EVERYTHING, each napkin, table cloth, chair, fork, knife, plate, glass, etc. (2) A per-person price, and usually a minimum food order amount. These places had a separate cake charge, and you paid it whether their baker supplied the cake, or you contracted the cake out.
Alcohol could be open bar, cash bar, or a mix (open wine or open wine and beer, cash bar for liquor).
We still didn't spend $175 a head in today's dollars, but we didn't have a plated, sit-down meal, which seems to be the norm these days (the last several weddings for freind's or family's kids I have been to).

=============================================================

Most weddings are about $30-$40 a head, which is still crazy, but understandable.

This is $175 a head.  That's insanity.

/If I can ever find a woman and I get married... I'll cook food (probably, say, Chicken and Pasta) myself, rent a giant white tent thingy from a family friend, and host the damn thing in my backyard.
//If the wife even thinks about wanting a $30000 reception, I'll call the wedding off and marry someone else.  For a couple hour event, it's stupid.


$40 a head wedding? Gotta love that Dennys wedding.
$170 per is reasonable
 
2017-07-16 05:14:55 PM  

MikeyFuccon: vudukungfu: I'm certain the father of the bride isn't using this as a charitable deduction on his taxes,

Seems the ex-groom was paying for most of it. Worse ways to save the surely fuming family of your ex-bride from losing face and for everyone to get at least some of their money back.

Let's face it---weddings that make Fark rarely end even this well.


The problem with marriages with lavish weddings, is that they generally indicate that the people involved don't want a marriage, they want a wedding.  They want a day where everyone makes them feel Disney-special.

Then after it's over, they realize they didn't actually want to be married, so they get a divorce.  Then at least one of them gets married again, because wasn't that wedding just special?
 
2017-07-16 05:15:38 PM  

Ker_Thwap: Even the legal stamp is a bit silly, requiring a Justice of the Peace and a goofy ceremony.  Seems like if you want the legal benefits of marriage, you should be able to fill in the paperwork and leave it at that.


My wife's sister got ordained by the Universal Life Church for free and paid $40 to register with the state as a minister. No JP required. The marriage certificate cost $71.
 
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