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(The Smoking Gun)   Florida Man and Florida Woman having sex in public at 3 AM were not happy to be caught in act by cop   ( thesmokinggun.com) divider line
    More: Florida, Meet Tabatha Lehman, Sexual intercourse, Craig Schultheis, Human sexual behavior, Officer Logan Ward, Criminal law, Legal terms, Complaint  
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6383 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jul 2017 at 7:08 PM (14 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-07-11 04:13:25 PM  
Yup. They look exactly like what you'd expect 2 Florida people having sex at 3am in public to look like.
 
2017-07-11 04:49:34 PM  
Been my observation that the kid of people who have sex in public are the kind of people you'd prefer not to see naked, to say nothing of watching them have sex.
 
2017-07-11 05:15:46 PM  
He: "I was just trying to get a piece of ass."

She: "I was getting my pussy eaten."

Such sweetness.  Such tenderness.  Moments like these make living worth the bother.
 
2017-07-11 05:26:11 PM  
If you're having sex in public, I don't think you get to be real picky about who sees you.

And given how those two look.....
 
2017-07-11 07:09:45 PM  
I question just how public 3am actually is.
 
2017-07-11 07:13:35 PM  

dj_bigbird: Yup. They look exactly like what you'd expect 2 Florida people having sex at 3am in public to look like.


Happy?
 
2017-07-11 07:14:46 PM  
In unrelated news, a police car was set ablaze behind the police station.
 
2017-07-11 07:15:31 PM  
i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2017-07-11 07:16:10 PM  
I saw the guy dancing in the AW commercial below and thought it was part of the story. Then the whole family joined in.
Woooooo get'n some!
 
2017-07-11 07:19:50 PM  
My methed-out sister moved to Florida. Every time I see the Florida tag I secretly hope it's her.
 
2017-07-11 07:24:59 PM  
At least there was no mention of vaginal odor this time.

What's wrong with a little good, clean fun?
 
2017-07-11 07:25:07 PM  
45 & 46?

Yeah, in dog years maybe.

/shudder
 
2017-07-11 07:25:22 PM  

dj_bigbird: Yup. They look exactly like what you'd expect 2 Florida people having sex at 3am in public to look like.


Really huh?

Who amongst us hasn't had sex in a technically public place when no one else is around?  They could have looked like anyone.
 
2017-07-11 07:25:56 PM  
Romance isn't Dead!  What a lovely couple.
 
2017-07-11 07:29:25 PM  
I bet he chased a rabbit or two (or other types of critters) out of her bush.  Beside, give the girl a break, I'm sure it's been a while since some dude did that to her.  A girl has needs...
 
2017-07-11 07:32:54 PM  
I read that as Wonder Woman for some reason.

I was really disappointed in that story after realizing my mistake.
 
2017-07-11 07:42:37 PM  

Prey4reign: He: "I was just trying to get a piece of ass."

She: "I was getting my pussy eaten."

Such sweetness.  Such tenderness.  Moments like these make living worth the bother.


I love pussy, but not so much that I'd eat that pussy.  I'm getting sores in my mouth just thinking about it.  He's a better man than me.
 
2017-07-11 07:46:28 PM  

NASAM: 45 & 46?

Yeah, in dog years maybe.

/shudder


"It's not the years, it's the mileage."

Likely both are heavy drinkers/smokers with an excellent chance of the occasional white powder snorted into the mix.
 
2017-07-11 07:47:33 PM  
Men placed in an "alpha male" position (politicians, police, family leaders, religious leaders, etc.) have this almost instinctive urge to control "whose boning who" among their social/family group.

This is common behaviour to many animal social groups where the leading male wants to ensure his DNA gets passed on and interlopers are mostly kept out of the gene pool.

The human race clearly still has a lot of evolving to do.
 
2017-07-11 07:52:31 PM  
Come on baby can't you see?  They're guilty of love in the first degree.
 
2017-07-11 07:55:03 PM  

JohnAnnArbor: In unrelated news, a police car was set ablaze behind the police station.

was that before or after the chlorine bath it took, with the officer still inside ?
 
2017-07-11 08:19:51 PM  
I feel so much safer now.
 
2017-07-11 08:32:54 PM  
They were being spontaneous.
 
2017-07-11 08:44:10 PM  
Well she sure seemed ok with it.

/doesn't care had sex.
 
2017-07-11 08:48:38 PM  

Combustion: My methed-out sister moved to Florida. Every time I see the Florida tag I secretly hope it's her.


Yep - one of my relatives moved to a retirement community down there and married a local. Fulfills every Florida stereotype I can think of.

/It takes a special kind of 60 year old to drive around in a lowered El Dorado and to brag about setting off all the other car alarms in the retirement community when she turns Hatebreed on full blast.

//really wish I was kidding
 
2017-07-11 08:50:21 PM  

common sense is an oxymoron: At least there was no mention of vaginal odor this time.

What's wrong with a little good, clean fun?


Holy shiat. That's the most disgusting thing I've read in a loooooong time.

Thanks!
 
2017-07-11 08:52:26 PM  
You get arrested for this? I thought the cop just shined their flashlight on you and told you to move it along. Is there like an ugliness clause or something?  Like they consider it an affront to their senses if you are too ugly to be showing that off?  Like "God dammit I am going to be seeing that for days! I am definitely running you in for making me see that." If so, they need to publish some clear guidelines. I mean, I don't think I am over the line yet, but how am I supposed to know?
 
2017-07-11 09:08:13 PM  
tse2.mm.bing.net
 
2017-07-11 09:23:53 PM  
Pretty judgemental on here.let's what you all look like with the lights on. I know you're shy and masturbate with the lights off.
 
2017-07-11 09:51:01 PM  

Big_Doofus: common sense is an oxymoron: At least there was no mention of vaginal odor this time.

What's wrong with a little good, clean fun?

Holy shiat. That's the most disgusting thing I've read in a loooooong time.

Thanks!


There were not one, but two Fark threads about it.

Enjoy.
 
2017-07-11 09:51:45 PM  
Did anyone complain about it?
If not who gives a fark let them get their sex on.
 
2017-07-11 10:21:10 PM  
Ianal but if they kept each other's organs in their mouths then aren't they technically not exposed? Would it be entrapment if they had to then expose them to answer an officer's questions?
 
2017-07-11 10:23:48 PM  

Frankly Speaking: I feel so much safer cleaner now.


FTFY
 
2017-07-11 10:25:06 PM  

stringbad: Ianal but if they kept each other's organs in their mouths then aren't they technically not exposed? Would it be entrapment if they had to then expose them to answer an officer's questions?


Mama always told us it was impolite to talk with food in our mouth
 
2017-07-11 10:28:40 PM  
img.fark.net
img.fark.net
 
2017-07-12 03:06:24 AM  
Combined with the photographs there was way too much information in that news report, way, way too much information.
 
2017-07-12 08:19:41 AM  
The real question here is, did he finish?
 
2017-07-12 08:36:54 AM  
Younger version of the guy:

img.fark.net
 
2017-07-12 10:36:03 AM  

MSBFDffpm: [img.fark.net image 465x290]
[img.fark.net image 259x194]


MAN!  That dude is buzzed out of his mind.  Look at those eyes!

/would not eat that pussy
 
2017-07-12 10:37:46 AM  
Unless No Fixed Address is that new condo complex, they look like they're used to doing everything in public.
 
2017-07-12 02:43:32 PM  
Oh, come *on*, farkers. What would you look like, and your, ahhhh, companion look like, at 03:00 on a night out?

Yeah, I know, scares the horses (no it doesn't, esp. since there were no horses around). Shoulda left them alone.
 
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