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(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)   Actual headline: Accused thief hits 18 unlocked vehicles in Lititz, makes off with (among other things) Tic Tacs, dog treats and wet wipes   ( fox43.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, Lititz Borough Police, County, New York City, Crime, New York, Lancaster, Pennsylvania, overnight theft spree, Connecticut  
•       •       •

1421 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jun 2017 at 9:02 AM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



42 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-06-29 08:25:10 AM  
No mousetraps?
 
2017-06-29 09:06:00 AM  
Is it okay to judge him and to think he looks like a cross between a redneck, a bro, and a genetically deformed retard?

/and by chance his actions support my judgement

img.fark.net
 
2017-06-29 09:07:47 AM  
No covfefe?
 
2017-06-29 09:12:17 AM  
Le Tits?
 
2017-06-29 09:16:08 AM  
Lit tits?

img.fark.net
 
2017-06-29 09:18:22 AM  
Found camera footage:

img.fark.net
 
2017-06-29 09:21:34 AM  
"Bonjour! Je m'appelle Gui LaDouche! J'habite à Le Tits! Comment allez-vous?"
 
2017-06-29 09:31:04 AM  
According to the arrest affidavit, the items Bishop is accused of stealing include:

One brown wallet
One gray wallet
One vehicle insurance card
An expired PA driver's license, a PA vehicle registration card and a PA voter registration card
Seven lighters
Five sets of vehicle keys
One woman's bracelet
Six knives
Two keychains (without keys)
One Nikon camera
Three packs of Tic-Tacs
One pair of binoculars
Two flashlights
One can of pepper spray
One small tape measure
One pack of mini red cups
One roll of used electrical tape
One multi-colored glass smoking device
One black Otter mobile phone cover
One pair of headphones
One transmitter
Four USB charging devices
One small baggie full of pens
Two packs of wet wipes
27 CD/DVDs
Two small screwdriver and socket tools
One Wendy's gift card (amount unknown)
One GameStop gift card (amount unknown)
One Toys R Us gift card (amount unknown)
One Fulton Bank Visa card
$29.94 in loose change
One men's shirt, with $50 price tag attached
Seven pieces of Bully Nugget dog treats

img.fark.net
 
2017-06-29 09:37:42 AM  

wxboy: Le Tits?


Is that French for The Tits?
 
2017-06-29 09:39:40 AM  

Yellow Beard: No covfefe?


Why would he have covfefe?

Yeah, I took the bait...
 
2017-06-29 09:47:36 AM  

Cdr.Murdock: Yellow Beard: No covfefe?

Why would he have covfefe?

Yeah, I took the bait...


How should I know? I don't even know what covfefe is.
 
2017-06-29 09:49:34 AM  

Yellow Beard: Cdr.Murdock: Yellow Beard: No covfefe?

Why would he have covfefe?

Yeah, I took the bait...

How should I know? I don't even know what covfefe is.


Your asking if he had it is defacto proof you have an idea (abstract or otherwise) what "it" is.

How can you ask if someone had something, if you don't know what it is?
 
2017-06-29 09:50:32 AM  
13252-presscdn-0-94.pagely.netdna-cdn.com
Which part(s) are "Le Titz"?
 
2017-06-29 09:50:59 AM  
One multi-colored glass smoking device


hahahahahahahaha
 
2017-06-29 09:52:40 AM  

Loaf's Tray: [13252-presscdn-0-94.pagely.netdna-cdn.com image 850x566]
Which part(s) are "Le Titz"?


The parts with the high beams.
 
2017-06-29 10:00:36 AM  
40.media.tumblr.com
 
2017-06-29 10:03:30 AM  

asciibaron: One multi-colored glass smoking device


hahahahahahahaha


Which added an additional charge:
"He was arrested and charged with ... one count of possession of drug paraphernalia."
 
2017-06-29 10:08:13 AM  
This kind of thoroughness is rare in a petty thief.  I feel like he could do well in a minimum wage job with this can-do attitude.
 
2017-06-29 10:09:43 AM  
Hopefully if he was in Lititz he stopped at Sturgis pretzel shop! A jem of central PA.
 
2017-06-29 10:16:47 AM  
Around here, at least one Responsible Gun Owner(tm) a week gets their gun stolen out of their unlocked vehicle.

/SMRT
 
2017-06-29 10:20:08 AM  
What's up with the crime spree in Lititz?  A while back it was rooftop farming; now we have a one-man B&E wave.
 
2017-06-29 10:26:37 AM  

El Dudereno: Around here, at least one Responsible Gun Owner(tm) a week gets their gun stolen out of their unlocked vehicle.

/SMRT


Where I live, that person is a cop and the gun getting stolen out of his unlocked car is just one of the many many things he has done that should have been enough to fire him over but he keeps winning union arbitration and gets reinstated.
 
2017-06-29 10:30:52 AM  

Yellow Beard: wxboy: Le Tits?

Is that French for The Tits?


This is the French version
wallpapersdsc.net
 
2017-06-29 10:59:25 AM  

asciibaron: One multi-colored glass smoking device


hahahahahahahaha


Double extra haha if that's what got him the drug paraphernalia charge.
 
2017-06-29 11:00:54 AM  

Loaf's Tray: [13252-presscdn-0-94.pagely.netdna-cdn.com image 850x566]
Which part(s) are "Le Titz"?


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2017-06-29 11:01:41 AM  

FrancoFile: [40.media.tumblr.com image 500x518]


Came for this, well done
 
2017-06-29 11:02:53 AM  

El Dudereno: Around here, at least one Responsible Gun Owner(tm) a week gets their gun stolen out of their unlocked vehicle.

/SMRT


Why the hostility?

Did he kill your dog, grill it for dinner, and get shot by the husband of the wife he was farking?
 
2017-06-29 11:05:26 AM  
Didn't think this was newsworthy? Perhaps I'm unimpressed because my car got hit by a similar person.
They took my 10 year old street directory, and a clip-in cup holder. Mine was one of 20 or so cars in one street. People are idiots.
 
2017-06-29 11:45:51 AM  

Cdr.Murdock: Yellow Beard: Cdr.Murdock: Yellow Beard: No covfefe?

Why would he have covfefe?

Yeah, I took the bait...

How should I know? I don't even know what covfefe is.

Your asking if he had it is defacto proof you have an idea (abstract or otherwise) what "it" is.

How can you ask if someone had something, if you don't know what it is?


Would Scotch tape work?
 
2017-06-29 11:51:45 AM  
Why did I read that as "wet treats and dog wipes"?
 
OOF
2017-06-29 11:53:10 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-06-29 12:04:05 PM  
He's more Bird-In-Hand than Intercourse.
 
2017-06-29 12:16:39 PM  
Getting a kick since this happened in front of my house while I was away.
 
2017-06-29 12:18:02 PM  

Tyler Perry's Tyler Perry Fark Account: Hopefully if he was in Lititz he stopped at Sturgis pretzel shop! A jem of central PA.


They're truly outrageous.
 
2017-06-29 12:23:20 PM  

BitwiseShift: According to the arrest affidavit, the items Bishop is accused of stealing include:

One brown wallet
One gray wallet
One vehicle insurance card
An expired PA driver's license, a PA vehicle registration card and a PA voter registration card
Seven lighters
Five sets of vehicle keys
One woman's bracelet
Six knives
Two keychains (without keys)
One Nikon camera
Three packs of Tic-Tacs
One pair of binoculars
Two flashlights
One can of pepper spray
One small tape measure
One pack of mini red cups
One roll of used electrical tape
One multi-colored glass smoking device
One black Otter mobile phone cover
One pair of headphones
One transmitter
Four USB charging devices
One small baggie full of pens
Two packs of wet wipes
27 CD/DVDs
Two small screwdriver and socket tools
One Wendy's gift card (amount unknown)
One GameStop gift card (amount unknown)
One Toys R Us gift card (amount unknown)
One Fulton Bank Visa card
$29.94 in loose change
One men's shirt, with $50 price tag attached
Seven pieces of Bully Nugget dog treats

[img.fark.net image 550x309]


Also would "steal pretty much anything that wasn't nailed down."

img.fark.net
 
2017-06-29 12:59:28 PM  

poorjon: Cdr.Murdock: Yellow Beard: Cdr.Murdock: Yellow Beard: No covfefe?

Why would he have covfefe?

Yeah, I took the bait...

How should I know? I don't even know what covfefe is.

Your asking if he had it is defacto proof you have an idea (abstract or otherwise) what "it" is.

How can you ask if someone had something, if you don't know what it is?

Would Scotch tape work?


More my speed...
 
2017-06-29 01:32:23 PM  

Cdr.Murdock: El Dudereno: Around here, at least one Responsible Gun Owner(tm) a week gets their gun stolen out of their unlocked vehicle.

/SMRT

Why the hostility?

Did he kill your dog, grill it for dinner, and get shot by the husband of the wife he was farking?


Maybe he's hostile because stolen guns are more likely to be used in crimes. These people who claim to be responsible are actually arming criminals.
 
2017-06-29 03:15:49 PM  

Yellow Beard: El Dudereno: Around here, at least one Responsible Gun Owner(tm) a week gets their gun stolen out of their unlocked vehicle.

/SMRT

Where I live, that person is a cop and the gun getting stolen out of his unlocked car is just one of the many many things he has done that should have been enough to fire him over but he keeps winning union arbitration and gets reinstated.


We should all have such a powerful union.

At least those of us who don't carry guns and have the ability to ruin peoples' lives and get away with murder.
 
2017-06-29 03:18:59 PM  

Cdr.Murdock: El Dudereno: Around here, at least one Responsible Gun Owner(tm) a week gets their gun stolen out of their unlocked vehicle.

/SMRT

Why the hostility?

Did he kill your dog, grill it for dinner, and get shot by the husband of the wife he was farking?


The news report didn't say.

Stolen guns are great tools for criminals though, because the guy who buys it from the thief doesn't have to jump through any legal obstacles, or risk having it traced back to him.
 
2017-06-29 03:32:08 PM  
I use to live in Lititz.  I depends on what side of the tracks they hit.  Some people have tic tacs and some others have Altoids
 
2017-06-29 07:28:38 PM  
"One roll of used electrical tape"

What exactly is, and why would anyone have that?
 
2017-06-29 08:40:13 PM  

ozman: "One roll of used electrical tape"

What exactly is, and why would anyone have that?


Came here to ask a similar question. If it's used how can it be considered 'a roll of electrical tape'? Wouldn't it just be a 'wad of electrical tape'?
 
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