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(MassLive)   'I'm going to hit you in the head,' woman named Miracle Crimes tells Springfield cop before kicking him in groin. "I never said which one"   ( masslive.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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8316 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jun 2017 at 6:50 PM (14 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-06-18 05:18:19 PM  
Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health.

Jesus christ was a mess this woman is. You know if a tiny fraction of the money that is now being spent to deal with this shiat show was spent supporting her and her mom in her first years this would not be happening.

This is true right across the board, you want to see a decrease in this sort of time consuming, costly, and unpleasant crap then start providing real support for moms and their babies.
 
2017-06-18 05:33:36 PM  
"I'm going to kill you so call your kids and tell them goodbye," she said

She sounds lovely.
 
2017-06-18 06:01:48 PM  
Quick Google search brings up http://fox61.com/2014/07/23/woman-named-miracle-crimes-charged-with-un​authorized-use-of-vehicle/
 
2017-06-18 06:18:46 PM  

Barfmaker: Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health.

Jesus christ was a mess this woman is. You know if a tiny fraction of the money that is now being spent to deal with this shiat show was spent supporting her and her mom in her first years this would not be happening.

This is true right across the board, you want to see a decrease in this sort of time consuming, costly, and unpleasant crap then start providing real support for moms and their babies.


 It's Massachusetts. We take care of our less fortunate here.
 
2017-06-18 06:29:24 PM  
Miracle Chimes?
Any relation to Reality Winner?

I feel like I've wandered into a Dick Tracy cartoon by mistake.
 
2017-06-18 06:56:03 PM  
 
2017-06-18 06:56:53 PM  
Miracle Crimes is my new Christian rock band name.
 
2017-06-18 06:59:22 PM  
Lucky for her she wasn't being confronted by Springfield officer Impervious Balls.
 
2017-06-18 07:04:52 PM  

bloobeary: Miracle Chimes?
Any relation to Reality Winner?

I feel like I've wandered into a Dick Tracy cartoon by mistake.


The 2018 Name of the Year bracket is going to be fierce.
 
2017-06-18 07:05:18 PM  
Thirty seconds later....
i498.photobucket.com
 
2017-06-18 07:08:23 PM  
She kicked him in the brain.
 
2017-06-18 07:09:46 PM  
linapps.s3.amazonaws.com
 
2017-06-18 07:10:33 PM  
i.ytimg.com
 
2017-06-18 07:12:12 PM  
Her sister's name is Heinous Crimes. They're kin to Victimless Crimes and Vic's father Blue Collar Crimes.
 
2017-06-18 07:17:04 PM  

fappomatic: Her sister's name is Heinous Crimes. They're kin to Victimless Crimes and Vic's father Blue Collar Crimes.


And the youngest brother "War," who met some new friends online and traveled overseas, and hasn't been heard from in a few years.
 
2017-06-18 07:18:10 PM  

Billy Liar: Thirty seconds later....
[i498.photobucket.com image 640x400]


I came here for Wiggum, Lou, and that other guy....and I leave satisfied.
 
2017-06-18 07:19:02 PM  
It's pronounced "Cree-mess".
 
Oak
2017-06-18 07:23:47 PM  

The_Sponge: Billy Liar: Thirty seconds later....
[i498.photobucket.com image 640x400]

I came here for Wiggum, Lou, and that other guy....and I leave satisfied.


Eddie.
 
2017-06-18 07:24:56 PM  
This is a case study in not naming your kid a "positive" name. See also: Winner and Loser Lane. I guess Miracle Crimes could have evened out, but her middle name was
 
2017-06-18 07:25:27 PM  
From TFA:
"Her arraignment was eventually postponed to allow Crimes to undergo a 20-day psychiatric evaluation.
On Friday, she returned to court and pleaded not guilty to the charges."


This woman needs help.  If incarceration is the only way to keep her on her meds, then that's what they must do.  Also from TFA:
"Boyle granted the prosecutor's bail requests and also revoked Crimes' release in her open case, effectively jailing her for up to 120 days. The judge also continued the new charges for a pretrial hearing next month."
If the effect of all this is to keep her on her meds, they have a couple of months with her stabilized to work out what to do between her lawyers and the prosecution.

Her lawyers' plaint,
"Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health."
hopefully is false.  Criminal incarceration can be coordinated with Department of Mental Health care, if necessary by holding her in a DMH lockup instead of county criminal lockup facilities.

Somebody who knows Massachusetts DMA and criminal procedure tell us that this isn't all just to get her back on her meds and work out a plan for the future.
 
2017-06-18 07:25:46 PM  

Oak: The_Sponge: Billy Liar: Thirty seconds later....
[i498.photobucket.com image 640x400]

I came here for Wiggum, Lou, and that other guy....and I leave satisfied.

Eddie.


Ah....thanks.
 
2017-06-18 07:28:48 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-06-18 07:30:53 PM  
If a woman named Miracle tells me something, I know it's true because
 
2017-06-18 07:31:56 PM  
So she is needlessly violent and disrespectful, and thinks she has the right to act like that? Are they sending her to jail or hiring her for the police force?
 
2017-06-18 07:34:47 PM  

sardonicobserver: Her lawyers' plaint,
"Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health."
hopefully is false.  Criminal incarceration can be coordinated with Department of Mental Health care, if necessary by holding her in a DMH lockup instead of county criminal lockup facilities.

Somebody who knows Massachusetts DMA and criminal procedure tell us that this isn't all just to get her back on her meds and work out a plan for the future.


It's likely true. For example, I know of a case in Mass. where a guy claimed to be a vampire and was convicted of murdering his grandmother, and he only started getting meds after he shanked a prison guard for trying to steal his spinal fluid. The prison was telling the prosecutors, "something's not right with this guy," long before they were going to do anything about it.
Additionally, the only crazy-person lockup in Mass. is Bridgewater, and it's terrible. This woman likely does have better access to mental health services on the outside.
 
2017-06-18 07:36:12 PM  

bingethinker: So she is needlessly violent and disrespectful, and thinks she has the right to act like that? Are they sending her to jail or hiring her for the police force?


Zing!

/but she failed to shout "stop resisting"
 
2017-06-18 07:43:30 PM  
Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health.

They might need to re-evaluate those services, they're obviously not working.
 
2017-06-18 07:51:25 PM  
Her parents should have named her Fashion.
 
2017-06-18 07:52:18 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-06-18 07:58:51 PM  

BigNumber12: And the youngest brother "War," who met some new friends online and traveled overseas, and hasn't been heard from in a few years.


She, of course, hyphenated her name.

fappomatic: Her sister's name is Heinous Crimes. They're kin to Victimless Crimes and Vic's father Blue Collar Crimes.


War and Heinous are family names.

War is named after his great grandfather. Named after her grandfather, War Crimes III
And Heinous is named after her great grandmother, Heinous Onhumanity

Heinous Onhumanity married War Crimes III and hyphenated her name to become 'Heinous Crimes Onhumanity'
 
2017-06-18 08:05:58 PM  
A man came up to me and said
"I'd like to change your mind
By hitting it with a rock, " he said,
"Though I am not unkind."
We laughed at his little joke
And then I happily walked away
And hit my head on the wall of the jail
Where the two of us live today.
 
2017-06-18 08:08:08 PM  
FTFA "It all started with a tray of donughts".

Too farking funny
 
2017-06-18 08:12:30 PM  

KingBiefWhistle: A man came up to me and said
"I'd like to change your mind
By hitting it with a rock, " he said,
"Though I am not unkind."
We laughed at his little joke
And then I happily walked away
And hit my head on the wall of the jail
Where the two of us live today.


You're just whistling in the dark.
 
2017-06-18 08:15:46 PM  
Bake her away toys.
 
2017-06-18 08:21:44 PM  
and yet...she's not dead.  makes you wonder why some perps are arrested and some people are just shot in cold blood.
 
2017-06-18 08:22:03 PM  
img.fark.net

any relation?
 
2017-06-18 08:22:57 PM  

Theaetetus: sardonicobserver: Her lawyers' plaint,
"Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health."
hopefully is false.  Criminal incarceration can be coordinated with Department of Mental Health care, if necessary by holding her in a DMH lockup instead of county criminal lockup facilities.

Somebody who knows Massachusetts DMA and criminal procedure tell us that this isn't all just to get her back on her meds and work out a plan for the future.

It's likely true. For example, I know of a case in Mass. where a guy claimed to be a vampire and was convicted of murdering his grandmother, and he only started getting meds after he shanked a prison guard for trying to steal his spinal fluid. The prison was telling the prosecutors, "something's not right with this guy," long before they were going to do anything about it.
Additionally, the only crazy-person lockup in Mass. is Bridgewater, and it's terrible. This woman likely does have better access to mental health services on the outside.


Ouch!  That's a lot worse than I expected.  Ideally they would have some way of ensuring that she stays on her meds long enough to adjust and help with planning her future.

Next time I'm going to go for a Limerick instead of trying to solve the problem.
 
2017-06-18 08:25:25 PM  
A seventh charge was added the next day, after Crimes allegedly spit in the face of a court officer before her appearance in Springfield District Court.

I think she wants to go to prison.
 
2017-06-18 08:30:08 PM  

Barfmaker: Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health.

Jesus christ was a mess this woman is. You know if a tiny fraction of the money that is now being spent to deal with this shiat show was spent supporting her and her mom in her first years this would not be happening.

This is true right across the board, you want to see a decrease in this sort of time consuming, costly, and unpleasant crap then start providing real support for moms and their babies.


img.fark.net
 
2017-06-18 08:45:30 PM  
It's a little known fact that people with mental issues often have superpowers. The cops are lucky she didn't transform into a 10 foot high Godzilla, barfing out flames and stomping everything in sight.
 
2017-06-18 08:45:35 PM  
Face it Her life was crap the moment she was named.
 
2017-06-18 08:47:03 PM  

WelldeadLink: [img.fark.net image 325x220]


That single kick looks like it was filmed in three locations with at least two stunt doubles. Or Chuck's kick was so powerful it obscured his face, changed the shadows, and greened up the grass.
 
2017-06-18 08:49:04 PM  

sardonicobserver: From TFA:
"Her arraignment was eventually postponed to allow Crimes to undergo a 20-day psychiatric evaluation.
On Friday, she returned to court and pleaded not guilty to the charges."

This woman needs help.  If incarceration is the only way to keep her on her meds, then that's what they must do.  Also from TFA:
"Boyle granted the prosecutor's bail requests and also revoked Crimes' release in her open case, effectively jailing her for up to 120 days. The judge also continued the new charges for a pretrial hearing next month."
If the effect of all this is to keep her on her meds, they have a couple of months with her stabilized to work out what to do between her lawyers and the prosecution.

Her lawyers' plaint,
"Jailing her, Keller said, would interrupt the services she is receiving from the Department of Mental Health."
hopefully is false.  Criminal incarceration can be coordinated with Department of Mental Health care, if necessary by holding her in a DMH lockup instead of county criminal lockup facilities.

Somebody who knows Massachusetts DMA and criminal procedure tell us that this isn't all just to get her back on her meds and work out a plan for the future.


I thought inmates couldn't get needed psychotropics in prison, don't they just lock 'em up in solitary confinement or strap them to a chair for a few hours when having an episode?
 
2017-06-18 08:59:49 PM  
But let's go ahead and blame Trump for this
 
2017-06-18 09:01:53 PM  

UsikFark: WelldeadLink: [img.fark.net image 325x220]

That single kick looks like it was filmed in three locations with at least two stunt doubles. Or Chuck's kick was so powerful it obscured his face, changed the shadows, and greened up the grass.


That's not Chuck Norris. That's Tom Laughlin in Billy Jack
 
2017-06-18 09:03:07 PM  

RJReves: UsikFark: WelldeadLink: [img.fark.net image 325x220]

That single kick looks like it was filmed in three locations with at least two stunt doubles. Or Chuck's kick was so powerful it obscured his face, changed the shadows, and greened up the grass.

That's not Chuck Norris. That's Tom Laughlin in Billy Jack


Oops, forgot the picture.s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com
 
2017-06-18 09:07:16 PM  
Put her in a cell with the guy in the "related story."  Only one will emerge.
 
fek [TotalFark]
2017-06-18 09:08:07 PM  
dem comments...
 
2017-06-18 09:28:33 PM  

RJReves: RJReves: UsikFark: WelldeadLink: [img.fark.net image 325x220]

That single kick looks like it was filmed in three locations with at least two stunt doubles. Or Chuck's kick was so powerful it obscured his face, changed the shadows, and greened up the grass.

That's not Chuck Norris. That's Tom Laughlin in Billy Jack

Oops, forgot the picture.[s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com image 391x530]


Dammit. It looked like a Chuck Norris kick, although I guess it wasn't roundhouse or flying so I should have known better. There's nearly always an edit (or two) in the middle of Chuck's kicks.
 
2017-06-18 09:38:09 PM  

fappomatic: Her sister's name is Heinous Crimes. They're kin to Victimless Crimes and Vic's father Blue Collar Crimes.


You forgot their hippie cousin Haight.
 
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