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(Nerve)   New chocolate gives people orgasms. "When I bite into a York Peppermint Patty, I get the sensation that I'm coming like a racehorse"   (nerve.com) divider line 108
    More: Interesting  
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50293 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 May 2004 at 7:30 AM (10 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2004-05-17 09:07:45 PM  
Now that's funny. Let's see how badly I've dated myself.
 
2004-05-17 09:11:44 PM  
Good headline
 
2004-05-17 09:21:56 PM  
nah, newmoon you did not date yourself.

not to me at least.

BUT! it was known before this that there is a reaction to chocolate, a brain reaction, that is very very similar to that of an orgasm. don't need a special chocolate.
 
2004-05-17 09:22:44 PM  
read: marketing scam!
 
2004-05-17 09:30:01 PM  
Now that's comedy!
 
2004-05-17 10:16:16 PM  
I'm getting a sensation... in my pants...

/my first TotalFark post, give me a break
 
2004-05-17 10:42:58 PM  
one_eyed_willie
Welcome to TF.
 
2004-05-17 11:10:15 PM  
Cause when I cum, I want it to feel like i'm pissing so hard that there's that layer of foam bubbles on top of the water in the bowl.
 
2004-05-17 11:43:41 PM  
I think I saw that video. German, I believe.
 
jbc [TotalFark]
2004-05-18 01:07:23 AM  


What's this I hear about biting into Peppermint Patty and causing orgasms?
 
2004-05-18 01:17:16 AM  
newmoonpuppyhead
Now that's funny. Let's see how badly I've dated myself.

Nope. But if you know what an Orgasmatron is, then you've dated yourself.

/like me..
 
2004-05-18 01:18:17 AM  
jbc, and to think that i couldn't stop laughing before your post...

gonna have to stop before i hyperventilllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
 
2004-05-18 03:55:49 AM  
Zabbadizzat:
Is that the one where it zooms in at the end and you go "EWWWWWWWW!!?," because that's one quality video.
 
2004-05-18 07:36:09 AM  
What happens to the poster when he bites into a 'Baby Ruth' bar?
 
2004-05-18 07:38:01 AM  
Does the chocolate come in Jimmy Choo flavor?!?!?!
 
2004-05-18 07:39:47 AM  
That's funny, because when I bite into a Creme Egg I get the sensation like a racehorse just came in my mouth.
 
2004-05-18 07:42:05 AM  
Bullshiat
 
2004-05-18 07:42:46 AM  
'Coming like a racehorse'? Is that a phrase? If so, I don't want to meet the one who coined it. oO
 
2004-05-18 07:44:06 AM  
"I'll pay 50 dollas for one!"

/pip
 
2004-05-18 07:45:22 AM  
i believe Robert Schimmel coined the phrase "coming like a racehorse"... i could be wrong though
 
2004-05-18 07:46:36 AM  
Still no cure for cancer.

Probably causes cancer.
 
2004-05-18 07:46:49 AM  
Like a racehorse on a flat rock?
 
2004-05-18 07:49:23 AM  
Finally we have a reason to actually buy chocolate on Valentine's Day.. got a headache sweetie? Here, eat this!
 
2004-05-18 07:53:53 AM  
djeyeless - i believe Robert Schimmel coined the phrase "coming like a racehorse"... i could be wrong though

I was thinking Catherine the Great......


/could've been the horsegag.mpg gal
 
2004-05-18 07:54:11 AM  
"reports The Sun"

nuff said?

sLoB
 
2004-05-18 07:59:42 AM  
Feh.

Legalize drugs and lace your chocolate with cocaine, why dontcha.

/likes achieving orgasms the old-fashioned way, thank-you
 
2004-05-18 07:59:45 AM  
Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't?

/nothin
 
2004-05-18 07:59:53 AM  
The York Peppermint ice cream flavored Klondike bars are the shiat. Try em.
 
2004-05-18 08:00:10 AM  
Funny headline. Stupid product idea. And that website... what the hell was that?
 
2004-05-18 08:05:09 AM  
Nerve.com's hilarious.

Read the "I did it for Science" section.
 
2004-05-18 08:07:02 AM  
Great headline...spit out my coffee!
 
2004-05-18 08:07:31 AM  
So now eating chocolate not only gives you EVIL EVIL carbs, but you kill a kitten with every bite. Life sucks.
 
2004-05-18 08:07:48 AM  
Where do I sign??
 
2004-05-18 08:10:49 AM  
your telling me, some ppl ignore studies from like a decade ago??

chocolate might have the same chemicals, but becuase its not directly released into the blood stream it has no effect on you.

if they make a chocalate that can keep the chemicals from going thru the digestive system and then being released into your blood, well thats another story

and pls dont try injecting chocolate into yourself
 
2004-05-18 08:12:17 AM  
I clicked on the "more..." button at the bottom of the article and you get to see a picture of the chocolate. It doesn't come in any of the shapes I was expecting. It's like a regular candy bar.
 
2004-05-18 08:13:10 AM  
Chocolate or kind woman, no contest.
 
2004-05-18 08:13:46 AM  
When I read that headline I laughed so hard milk came out of my nose.

/wish I had been drinking milk at the time.
 
2004-05-18 08:14:30 AM  
First they bring us pills to feel horny and loose weight... and now chocolat that makes us have orgasms...

I cant wait for the next post.

Pizza that makes you blond?
Donuts that make you longer?
...
 
2004-05-18 08:16:11 AM  
You could call 'em "Dongnuts"!
 
2004-05-18 08:20:49 AM  
AHHHH hahaha. This thread is shaping up to be the most hilarious in a while!
 
2004-05-18 08:24:58 AM  
everyday chocolate does have something in common with orgasms(chemicals/workings of the brain). it's really just a cheap ploy, much like many herbal suppliments.
scenario:
lets say the body normally has .20mg of a chemical in the bloodstream.
you then take an herb or piece of chocolate and the chemical in the bloodstream is boosted to .215mg.
this very tiny difference usually has no bearing at all on how you feel. because there is an increase, even just a ridiculously small one, the product is produced and word spreads that it is good for this, or it does that.
but look on the container of many products like this and find misleading or stupid things like, "may help to...." or "some studies show increases....". it's usually a good indicator of a snake oil.
the everyday chocolate and it's assossiation with good feelings because of chemicals/ reactions is bogus as far as having any noticable feelings of bliss/happiness, even to a third party.
to prove the point,a single serving salami contains 100x the level of the same "orgasm" chemicals found in a chocolate bar.
go ahead, i know someone is dying to comment on the fact that 'salami' and 'orgasm' are in the same sentence.
these new bars just seem like more snake oil, only with more crap floating around in it.
 
2004-05-18 08:25:54 AM  
Obligatory Matrix cheesecake joke.
 
2004-05-18 08:27:08 AM  
I read the article and found it rather weird, actually. I didn't think that phenylethylamine (the chemical they're doping this chocolate with in higher quantities) was supposed to exert this effect without an MAO-B inhibitor (example: selegiline), as this chemical tends not to last very long in the human body otherwise. Someone want to help me out here?
 
2004-05-18 08:28:12 AM  
There are many people here who owe me a new keyboard.
 
2004-05-18 08:30:32 AM  
Elsewhere in the article:

She also claimed that robotic prostitutes are set to be developed and predicted under-the-skin microchips which tell if someone has been unfaithful.

They could record bodily temperature changes, revealing whether partners had been steamy with someone else.


"I have not been unfaithful Niles! I was merely using my Thor 2000 again."

"But Pamela, that's twelve times this week, and it's only Wednesday!"

I think if your relationship has gotten to the point you have to have a chip implanted to prove your fidelity, it's time to get out the court papers and get the divorce done.

On the other hand I can see both men and women being brow beaten into having such a thing done. At that point you have two options: dog collar (might as well be honest) or assertiveness training.

--h
 
2004-05-18 08:31:47 AM  
"Of the 28 phenylethylamines recognized as such by HHS, there are eight which have neither been scheduled in the United States nor recommended for scheduling by the World Health Organization (WHO). Yet the Expert Committee on Drug Abuse of WHO has reviewed the abuse potential of all 28."

Phenylethylamines are a class of drugs very simular to PMA and MDMA I don't know exactily what is in that cholate, but their is a good chance its banned in the states.
 
2004-05-18 08:35:10 AM  
lhaeh:

That chocolate has the chemical PEA (phenylethylamine) in spades. It's not going to be banned in the US anytime soon, seeing as it's an endogenous neuromodulator that's pretty omnipresent and all. Those other phenylethylamines that you're referring to, PMA and MDMA, are banned for other reasons (some of which include Alexander Shulgin), and are able to exert their effects because of their similarity to PEA.
 
2004-05-18 08:36:56 AM  
hdhale

How about a modern-day equivalent of the Bedouin puzzle-ring. They were intricately designed to be impossible to remove from a woman's finger without being disassembled, and very difficult to put back together except for the person who knew the unique construction of that ring. Only today, we have enough technology to place a temperature+conductivity+heart-rate-monitor+break-beam-dectection logging device into a wedding ring, so that if it is ever taken off it will be known, and it will also monitor the wearer's current level of excitement. Someday the wedding ring will symbolize more than a sacred vow...though it's interesting the technology appeared at a time when most people don't give a shiat anymore.
 
2004-05-18 08:37:28 AM  
"natural chemicals that heighten bodily sensations and thus allow for easier orgasm. "

Like I need help speeding up my orgasm.
 
2004-05-18 08:41:14 AM  
Thanks for the article... I was wondering what the next flood of Spam was going to be about. Here it comes in 3... 2... 1....


CHOC.ol4t3 0rgas.M fr33 0v.rN1TE sh1pp1ng!
 
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