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(The Raw Story)   Alex Jones Custody lawyer : He's not REALLY nuts at all; those rants are just an act. Alex Jones on FB on the way to court: This is 100% real and anyone who says otherwise is part of a globalist plot to destroy me. Lawyer: Can I get paid in cash?   ( rawstory.com) divider line
    More: Followup, Donald Trump, right-wing conspiracy theorist, Character, WWE Raw, Alex Jones, President Donald Trump, Vince McMahon, New World Order  
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8621 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Apr 2017 at 6:16 PM (26 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



153 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2017-04-18 05:18:47 PM  
Here's the thing, even if it's an act Jones can never, EVER drop it.  The paranoid nutjob routine is his meal ticket, he has no other marketable skills.
 
2017-04-18 05:22:22 PM  

Flappyhead: Here's the thing, even if it's an act Jones can never, EVER drop it.  The paranoid nutjob routine is his meal ticket, he has no other marketable skills.


Yep.  He's found himself between a rock and dumb place.
 
2017-04-18 05:29:30 PM  
The most disturbing this about all this is that Alex Jones actually reproduced.
 
2017-04-18 05:37:28 PM  

scottydoesntknow: The most disturbing this about all this is that Alex Jones actually reproduced.


can you imagine his O-face?
 
2017-04-18 05:39:00 PM  

FlashHarry: scottydoesntknow: The most disturbing this about all this is that Alex Jones actually reproduced.

can you imagine his O-face?


I bet you he soils himself and then cries.
 
2017-04-18 05:56:07 PM  

Diogenes: FlashHarry: scottydoesntknow: The most disturbing this about all this is that Alex Jones actually reproduced.

can you imagine his O-face?

I bet you he soils himself and then cries.


media.tenor.co
 
2017-04-18 06:17:56 PM  
He's not crazy, he's just a farking asshole.
 
2017-04-18 06:20:02 PM  

Begoggle: He's not crazy, he's just a farking asshole.


Wait a minute:
img.fark.net
 
2017-04-18 06:21:28 PM  
Imagine for a moment, if you will, how great our country would be if all of Alex Jones' viewers just suddenly died.  Or left.  Or were permanently detained.
 
2017-04-18 06:22:06 PM  

Diogenes: FlashHarry: scottydoesntknow: The most disturbing this about all this is that Alex Jones actually reproduced.

can you imagine his O-face?

I bet you he soils himself and then cries.


Alex Jones becomes a Super Saiyan
Youtube LhqUk28OwHs

I'm also not doubting he's ranting about Obama during saxy times, it helps him climax.
 
2017-04-18 06:22:33 PM  
So, do you think the jury will be shown that video?
 
2017-04-18 06:23:04 PM  
You can't stir up a million full-blown whackjobs and then tell them you were lying, not if you weren't smart enough to do it anonymously. Look at how Beck has been slowly pulling it back. That's about as safely as you can do it.
 
2017-04-18 06:23:56 PM  
He's not a stochastic terrorist, he just plays one on TV!
 
2017-04-18 06:23:59 PM  
This is almost like an MPRE scenario or Professional Responsibility final exam question.
 
2017-04-18 06:24:51 PM  
Good thing judges don't view Fark or Facebook, otherwise Jones' would be screwed.
 
2017-04-18 06:25:28 PM  
Who ?
 
2017-04-18 06:25:53 PM  
Why can't this jagoff do a Brietbart and make the world a better place?
 
2017-04-18 06:26:22 PM  

BenJammin: Good thing judges don't view Fark or Facebook, otherwise Jones' would be screwed.


If I'm his wife's attorney, I am walking into court with that Facebook post printed out on a huge poster board in case the judge doesn't have Facebook.
 
2017-04-18 06:26:56 PM  
We all know that Bill Hicks turned into Alex Jones.
 
2017-04-18 06:27:02 PM  

BenJammin: Good thing judges don't view Fark or Facebook, otherwise Jones' would be screwed.


Lawyers do.  And his ex I bet does too.
 
2017-04-18 06:28:12 PM  

RottenEggs: Who ?


The guy whom the President trusts as a source for facts.
 
2017-04-18 06:28:15 PM  
He's just keeping kayfabe alive

Its still real to me damn it
Youtube V0EZobdiJ4M
 
2017-04-18 06:28:17 PM  
Joe Rogan does his Alex Jones impression
Youtube iTAdcLaOkCI
 
2017-04-18 06:29:00 PM  
Counselor, will you take 125% in Bitcoin?
 
2017-04-18 06:30:01 PM  
What the heck is "globalism" and why am I never privy to all these grand sweeping conspiracies that I'm supposedly part of?
 
2017-04-18 06:30:48 PM  
Ok, here's an actual strategy he may be employing here:

1. He's a crazy derpshiat public figure, but his lawyer tells the judge that he is simply acting

2. To prove this, Jones writes up a script of him ranting and hands this script to the judge

3. Following day, Jones reads this script verbatim into a camera and broadcasts to his followers

4. QED

5. The Aristocrats.
 
2017-04-18 06:31:14 PM  
His hardcore supporters will swear that THEY got to him!

STUDY IT OUT, SHEEPLE!  AND BUY GOLD!
 
2017-04-18 06:31:24 PM  

lennavan: Imagine for a moment, if you will, how great our country would be if all of Alex Jones' viewers just suddenly died.  Or left.  Or were permanently detained.


Wait, what if you watch it because it's like a train wreck and you can't wait to see what he'll come up with next? Same reason I watch the Jim Bakker stuff, so I can see what Vic Berger is gonna have to work with next.
 
2017-04-18 06:31:30 PM  

Flappyhead: Here's the thing, even if it's an act Jones can never, EVER drop it.  The paranoid nutjob routine is his meal ticket, he has no other marketable skills.


This. The cynical side of me (ie. both sides of me) says it's his shtick. Of course with some most of the stuff he says, you'd have to be so stupid you'd have difficulty remembering to breathe.  So, it seems like it must be an act.
 
2017-04-18 06:33:22 PM  
By releasing this video is just proves that Alex Jones values fleecing the gullible out of their money with his conspiracy theories and store full of placebos over seeing his kids. And he'll go on rants as soon as he is back on the air calling other people "heathens" without any shame.
 
2017-04-18 06:33:45 PM  

scottydoesntknow: The most disturbing this about all this is that Alex Jones actually reproduced.


This. How come perfectly nice people have problems with fertility, while giant douchebags seem to reproduce with ease? Is there something about assholery that gives extra motility to sperm or something?
 
2017-04-18 06:34:03 PM  
the big question:  Is he really 43?  He doesn't look a day under 55
 
2017-04-18 06:34:21 PM  

ThatBillmanGuy: lennavan: Imagine for a moment, if you will, how great our country would be if all of Alex Jones' viewers just suddenly died.  Or left.  Or were permanently detained.

Wait, what if you watch it because it's like a train wreck and you can't wait to see what he'll come up with next? Same reason I watch the Jim Bakker stuff, so I can see what Vic Berger is gonna have to work with next.


I suppose I could be convinced to change "viewers" to "supporters."
 
2017-04-18 06:35:05 PM  

Feel_the_velvet: the big question:  Is he really 43?  He doesn't look a day under 55


Came to say this. Can't believe that man is only a year older than I am.
 
2017-04-18 06:35:52 PM  

Obscure Login: By releasing this video is just proves that Alex Jones values fleecing the gullible out of their money with his conspiracy theories and store full of placebos over seeing his kids. And he'll go on rants as soon as he is back on the air calling other people "heathens" without any shame.


Actually, it looks like it's been deleted. I really hope someone captured that. XD
 
2017-04-18 06:37:20 PM  

nytmare: What the heck is "globalism" and why am I never privy to all these grand sweeping conspiracies that I'm supposedly part of?


Code word for the "liberal Jewish conspiracy."

"Globalists" is code for "Jews." See also "mainstream media" and "New York bankers."
 
2017-04-18 06:37:38 PM  

scottydoesntknow:  Veiny Volcacanoface actually reproduced.


Oh god no... ohmy GAWD NO! OH GOD NO.
Say it in Quagmire's voice.
 
2017-04-18 06:38:14 PM  

lennavan: Imagine for a moment, if you will, how great our country would be if all of Alex Jones' viewers just suddenly died.  Or left.  Or were permanently detained.


No shiat.
 
2017-04-18 06:39:01 PM  

Nick Nostril: This. The cynical side of me (ie. both sides of me) says it's his shtick. Of course with some most of the stuff he says, you'd have to be so stupid you'd have difficulty remembering to breathe.  So, it seems like it must be an act.


I think it starts as an act for a lot of them, as a grift to make money.  The thing is, once you start to make a lot of money doing it, it's easy for people to reverse rationalize that as proof that what they're saying is true:

"A lot of people are giving me a lot of money for this.  That must mean that what I'm saying is valuable, because a lot of people are telling me it is.  Therefore what I'm saying is valuable and true.  And not just a little bit, but clearly I am some kind of actual prophet.  I mean, if I weren't, then I wouldn't be making so much more money every time I say something crazier than last time."
 
2017-04-18 06:39:17 PM  

nytmare: What the heck is "globalism" and why am I never privy to all these grand sweeping conspiracies that I'm supposedly part of?


Basically, according to Jones, it's an extremely elaborate plot for the UN to take over everything and form one world government. That's when the mandatory gay turtle marriages and abortions start. And nothing will have any value except all of this lovely GOOOOOLD; despite its utter uselessness for anything other than being a malleable dust collecting semi-conductor.

/ yeah, let me just chip off $10 worth of this 82 lb gold bar....
 
2017-04-18 06:39:49 PM  

skyotter: So, do you think the jury will be shown that video?


Well, according to the Buzzfeed reporter live Tweeting the hearing, the judge was to decide if that particular video was made in violation of a gag order... but it seems the video has disappeared.

I think I'm more disturbed that Alex Jones disrobed during a family therapy session with the ex and kids in attendance.
 
2017-04-18 06:40:03 PM  
The lawyer had his business card all screwed up:

s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2017-04-18 06:40:24 PM  

nytmare: What the heck is "globalism" and why am I never privy to all these grand sweeping conspiracies that I'm supposedly part of?


It's code for the Jews.

Anytime anyone starts ranting about globalists, they're really talking about the Jewish Conspiracy.
 
2017-04-18 06:40:28 PM  
What kind of a lawyer looks at that walking dumpster fire and thinks "yea.... that's what I want to tie myself to, that's the hill I want to die on"?

It's like a contractor doing work for Donald Trump at this point. The history's established. You know you're gambling with a bad hand. Why the fark would you go all in on it?
 
2017-04-18 06:43:02 PM  

Dave, Harbinger of Madness: Obscure Login: By releasing this video is just proves that Alex Jones values fleecing the gullible out of their money with his conspiracy theories and store full of placebos over seeing his kids. And he'll go on rants as soon as he is back on the air calling other people "heathens" without any shame.

Actually, it looks like it's been deleted. I really hope someone captured that. XD


I'm sure people have, and I'm sure they are willingly sending it to his ex's lawyer for free.
 
2017-04-18 06:43:18 PM  

skozlaw: What kind of a lawyer looks at that walking dumpster fire and thinks "yea.... that's what I want to tie myself to, that's the hill I want to die on"?

It's like a contractor doing work for Donald Trump at this point. The history's established. You know you're gambling with a bad hand. Why the fark would you go all in on it?


Sadly that walking dumpster fire is full of dumpster money given to him by people that like the sound of a fire roaring in a dumpster.

Money can buy you a defense. And I'm betting he's already getting paid for his work, none of that "you don't pay if we don't win" guarantee.
 
2017-04-18 06:45:16 PM  
That guy is the Hindenburg of rationality, the Titanic of reason, the shuttle Columbia of credibility, the Hood of accountability... What I'm saying is that I wish he would explode and sink out of sight.
 
2017-04-18 06:46:37 PM  
What a shameless farking charlatan
 
2017-04-18 06:46:38 PM  

skozlaw: What kind of a lawyer looks at that walking dumpster fire and thinks "yea.... that's what I want to tie myself to, that's the hill I want to die on"?

It's like a contractor doing work for Donald Trump at this point. The history's established. You know you're gambling with a bad hand. Why the fark would you go all in on it?


A really stupid one who thinks he/she can hogwash any sane, thinking judge and jury.

...okay, that was a real stretch on the "jury" part, but yeah...
 
2017-04-18 06:46:59 PM  

stoli n coke: nytmare: What the heck is "globalism" and why am I never privy to all these grand sweeping conspiracies that I'm supposedly part of?

Code word for the "liberal Jewish conspiracy."

"Globalists" is code for "Jews." See also "mainstream media" and "New York bankers."


Despite Jones having "debates" with David Duke; he's all (at least during his show) "I support Israel".

/ HRC, Obama and anyone to the left of Reagan is a "globalist"
 
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