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(Gizmodo)   Ten deep sea creatures that make you glad we don't venture far below the surface. Bonus: At least one is a Farker   ( gizmodo.com) divider line
    More: Creepy, Shark, Eel, Spooky fact, Deep sea fish, Elopomorpha, gulper eel, lifestyle, goblin shark  
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3389 clicks; posted to Geek » on 17 Apr 2017 at 6:14 PM (27 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-04-17 04:29:07 PM  
They are all delicious.
 
2017-04-17 04:40:45 PM  
is highly amused by your list:
faculty.montgomerycollege.edu
 
2017-04-17 05:31:56 PM  
I've seen many black swallowers.
 
2017-04-17 05:33:24 PM  
img.fark.net

And one terrifying surface one which will make you wish you lived down there
 
2017-04-17 05:41:05 PM  
socawlege.com
 
2017-04-17 05:45:18 PM  

DammitIForgotMyLogin: [img.fark.net image 425x512]

And one terrifying surface one which will make you wish you lived down there


The ferret wearing cheeto faced shiatgibbonfish is usually found in shallower waters, and seems particularly attracted to golf course water hazards.
 
2017-04-17 06:10:56 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-04-17 06:30:59 PM  
img.fark.net

O HAI GUYZ!!
 
2017-04-17 07:12:37 PM  
The only deep sea dweller that matters is Cthulhu.
 
2017-04-17 07:17:29 PM  
Ugh. Thanks for the nightmare fuel.
 
2017-04-17 07:30:58 PM  
I was haunted by the deep sea angler fish since I was a child; then on a visit to the Monterey Aquarium, I was told they are about the size of my thumb!
 
2017-04-17 07:38:10 PM  
img.fark.net
They haunt your dreams.
 
2017-04-17 07:41:15 PM  
From #2:

Because these monsters live so deep, food is scarce, so they often resort to eating creatures much larger than them. Sometimes, these farking geniuses eat things so big their stomach ruptures and they die in the least dignified way ever.

Wait, so the reason you find it so scary is that it'll eat things far larger than it (which it looked pretty damn small in the picture), thus killing itself if it's too big...? Just how terrified of everything are you people at Gizmodo?
 
2017-04-17 07:42:03 PM  
Goblin Shark: neat living fossil, shows how some of the more successful predatory fish turned into sharks after discarding the "heavier armor and thicker, sharper jaws" arms race they'd been in previously. I'm sure medieval Japanese fishermen thought they were being pranked when they caught one.

Dumbo Octopus: looks like a Pokemon.

Giant Isopod: Get that thing the hell away from me. Arthropods have no business being that big outside the WETA workshop. I don't care if it's tasty. If I see one, I'm getting a blunt instrument.

Anglerfish: I had no idea they were as horrific as they look, especially in terms of reproduction. Still chuckling at "They're like a rainbow... of ugly!"

Viperfish: Looks like a horror movie effect. Why does everything that lives below 100 meters or so look like a horror movie effect?

Ghost Shark: That's not a rare shark. That's the actual undead spectre of a shark that died a horrible death. And it wants revenge...

Gulper Eel: Looks like a horror movie effect. Yet again.

Vampire Squid: While I do agree that eating the dead micro-carcasses in marine "snow" is on-brand for something with the word "vampire" in its name, how does one evolve from something as specialized to be a pelagic predator as a squid - what with the speedy water jets, enormous eyes, and highly adapted arms to catch fish - to basically filter-feeding? Seems like a weird direction for a critter to take.

Black Swallower: Looks photoshopped. Like an illustration meant to go with a Creepypasta. Which would nobody would read due to it being unfortunately buried in the Google search results for all the porn that comes up under "Black Swallower"...

Frilled Shark: Looks photoshopped. By someone with a phallic obsession. Adult male narcissist, female nymphomaniac, or 13-year old boy, I'd guess.
 
2017-04-17 07:52:32 PM  
And I guarantee that every one of them has been sampled by a Japanese person at some point.

It's a bit disconcerting to be standing in an aquarium at Japan, marveling at the strange and wondrous beauty that nature can create, and then overhearing the muttering of the people next to you trying to figure out its flavor profile from its appearance.
 
2017-04-17 08:03:32 PM  

Kurohone: And I guarantee that every one of them has been sampled by a Japanese person at some point.

It's a bit disconcerting to be standing in an aquarium at Japan, marveling at the strange and wondrous beauty that nature can create, and then overhearing the muttering of the people next to you trying to figure out its flavor profile from its appearance.


At least they're honest about it.
 
2017-04-17 08:29:56 PM  
Bonus: At least one is a Farker

img.fark.net

Indeed
 
2017-04-17 09:04:08 PM  
Mr. Bungle - Chemical Marriage
Youtube bnrPLxY1cII
 
2017-04-17 09:08:38 PM  
His name is Bob, submitter
 
2017-04-17 09:12:20 PM  
I think the underwater worms are far more terrifying than anything on that list. Those things just look wrong and they are venomous.
 
2017-04-17 09:19:08 PM  
Hey, who you callin' a dumbo octopus?
 
2017-04-17 09:29:05 PM  
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
The dumbo octopus made the list but phronima didn't? They make their homes from the hollowed out body of another creature.
 
2017-04-17 09:48:13 PM  
Where the hell is Gulper_Eel?

Also, isopods are icky.

media.treehugger.com

s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2017-04-18 02:42:26 AM  

Parthenogenetic: Where the hell is Gulper_Eel?

Also, isopods are icky.

[media.treehugger.com image 450x600]

[s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com image 570x603]


Meanwhile, these are expensive delicacies:

velvetescape.com

www.factzoo.com

And, though not a crustacean, here's another delicious ocean invertebrate. Those blue spots are eyes, incidentally.

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2017-04-18 04:30:10 AM  

TheOtherGuy: Gulper Eel: Looks like a horror movie effect. Yet again.


I get a lot of that.
 
2017-04-18 09:35:07 AM  
"Black Swallower"?

1.bp.blogspot.com

"Challenge accepted!"
 
2017-04-18 04:37:30 PM  
#1 The dreaded sea penis
 
2017-04-18 08:01:54 PM  

WordsnCollision: [img.fark.net image 696x426]

O HAI GUYZ!!


I wonder, do they look like that underwater, or do they just get all distended and blob-like when under only 1atm pressure?  To a deep seas fish, that may as well be hard vacuum, y'know?

/well, aside from the water boiling off
 
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