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(Jalopnik)   While it's important to stay hydrated, you certainly can't use that defense when you're caught dragging a rainwater collection tank on a broken trailer attached to an unregistered car while under the influence of meth   ( jalopnik.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, Truck, rainwater collection tank, Vehicle, Wheel, rain collection tank, South Australia Police, South Australia, Rock music  
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2362 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Apr 2017 at 4:08 PM (31 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



37 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-04-15 02:37:21 PM  
I'm assuming meth makes you very thirsty.
 
2017-04-15 02:55:02 PM  
Is that normal...?
 
2017-04-15 03:10:03 PM  
I was guessing Colorado.
 
2017-04-15 03:27:21 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-04-15 04:11:47 PM  
It's especially important on meth, and XTC.
 
2017-04-15 04:12:16 PM  

edmo: Is that normal...?


Stealing water tanks is not normal but on Dune it is

cdn.meme.amView Full Size
 
2017-04-15 04:15:13 PM  
i0.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2017-04-15 04:16:27 PM  
All that and not Florida? Amazing
 
2017-04-15 04:26:10 PM  
Ahh tweakers ....If it was in Florida, he would have had a no tooth woman and unbathed children with him.
 
2017-04-15 04:29:03 PM  
I'm sure it seemed like a good idea at the time...
 
2017-04-15 04:33:38 PM  

Truck Fump: I'm sure it seemed like a good idea at the time...


And now a brilliant mistake.
 
2017-04-15 04:52:06 PM  
If dragging a rainwater collection tank on a broken trailer attached to an unregistered car while under the influence of meth is wrong, I don't want to be right.
 
2017-04-15 05:11:52 PM  

NewportBarGuy: I'm assuming meth makes you very thirsty.


It does, actually. It dries out the salivary glands. That (and that meth heads usually drink soda to fight the cotton mouth) is what causes meth mouth.
 
2017-04-15 05:27:59 PM  
This being South Australia it sounds like some pretty normal driving. I am suprised they booked him.
 
2017-04-15 05:33:20 PM  
As a farm boy myself, I have to say the only bad idea in the headline is the meth. There are tons on unlicensed farm vehicles out there, pulling all kinds of equipment. It's how we all get to eat.

Now doing it under the influence, I won't speak ill of the neighbours, but I've seen plenty of bottles behind the barn. But meth is cray-cray for working on farms, with all the blades and heavy equipment and hell, the dehydration involved.

Welcome to reality, Jalopnik. What the fark did you think farm vehicles were doing?
 
433 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2017-04-15 05:41:57 PM  

Bennie Crabtree: As a farm boy myself, I have to say the only bad idea in the headline is the meth. There are tons on unlicensed farm vehicles out there, pulling all kinds of equipment. It's how we all get to eat.

Now doing it under the influence, I won't speak ill of the neighbours, but I've seen plenty of bottles behind the barn. But meth is cray-cray for working on farms, with all the blades and heavy equipment and hell, the dehydration involved.

Welcome to reality, Jalopnik. What the fark did you think farm vehicles were doing?


The trailer was missing a tire and was connected to the tow hook, not  a hitch, and the driver was unable to see behind him.

This isn't the same as crawling a tractor down a farm to market or moving a combine between fields.

Granted, I've seen unsafe-ish operation on the family farm, but this guy isn't even close to that!
 
433 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2017-04-15 05:45:55 PM  
I meant that he was much more of a hazard. S
 
2017-04-15 06:47:52 PM  
That is amateur sheit right there Australia. Step up your game, or STFU!

THIS IS FLORIDA, holder of the title, and what you are up against...

andrikyrychok.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
2017-04-15 07:00:50 PM  
Jonah Takalua has grown up!
 
2017-04-15 07:03:09 PM  

Percise1: That is amateur sheit right there Australia. Step up your game, or STFU!

THIS IS FLORIDA, holder of the title, and what you are up against...

[andrikyrychok.files.wordpress.com image 703x830]


The suspension on my bro's Sierra XR4x4 sat down when he loaded the tools he'd stolen from his army workshop into it.

Does that count?

/Pretty sure the statue of imitations has expired on that.
 
2017-04-15 07:05:00 PM  

Percise1: That is amateur sheit right there Australia. Step up your game, or STFU!

THIS IS FLORIDA, holder of the title, and what you are up against...

[andrikyrychok.files.wordpress.com image 703x830]


Even with a waiver, the store manager of that Home Depot might have had some liability. This goes way beyond "we're not responsible" when they're the ones loading it and watching the car crumple under the weight. When it hit a certain point, they should have stopped and alerted the guy to the fact that they were not just damaging his car, but that he was a danger to EVERYONE ELSE ON THE ROAD. The waiver doesn't relieve them of that liability; only the liability for damage to the vehicle.

IANAL, but I think someone could really have gotten after Home Depot for that.
 
2017-04-15 07:34:08 PM  
The title of the press release: Tank goodness he's off the roads!

Little Aussie humor there I see.


Percise1: That is amateur sheit right there Australia. Step up your game, or STFU!

THIS IS FLORIDA, holder of the title, and what you are up against...

[andrikyrychok.files.wordpress.com image 703x830]


Snopes suggests it was Waldorf, Maryland- and the license plate on the car was Floriduh.
 
2017-04-15 07:41:34 PM  
Well damn, call me surprised. I thought only people from far northern California did shiat like this. In fact, I was behind one such moran yesterday driving a U-haul while towing a tank on a flatbed with no plates. Meth may or may not have been involved. It is that time of year after all.
 
2017-04-15 07:56:15 PM  

iron de havilland: Sierra XR4x4


Sure, but what did he steal, a crescent wrench and a socket set? :P

WilderKWight: Percise1: That is amateur sheit right there Australia. Step up your game, or STFU!

THIS IS FLORIDA, holder of the title, and what you are up against...

[andrikyrychok.files.wordpress.com image 703x830]

Even with a waiver, the store manager of that Home Depot might have had some liability. This goes way beyond "we're not responsible" when they're the ones loading it and watching the car crumple under the weight. When it hit a certain point, they should have stopped and alerted the guy to the fact that they were not just damaging his car, but that he was a danger to EVERYONE ELSE ON THE ROAD. The waiver doesn't relieve them of that liability; only the liability for damage to the vehicle.

IANAL, but I think someone could really have gotten after Home Depot for that.


I'm sure the manager rightfully concluded that rig-a-haulin' wouldn't be making it 1/4 mile at a crawl before something let go, so it was worth the risk to see it happen. Besides, he did everyone a service by disabling the guy's vehicle and setting him up for arrest. If he just told the guy "hell no, get out of here", he would have been back in traffic and a threat to everyone.

maxandgrinch: Snopes suggests it was Waldorf, Maryland- and the license plate on the car was Floriduh.


Agreed, but because of the Floriduh plates I going to let them own it. I mean really, if Floriduh man crosses a state line (or two), isn't it still really a Floriduh story?
 
2017-04-15 08:05:37 PM  

Percise1: iron de havilland: Sierra XR4x4


Sure, but what did he steal, a crescent wrench and a socket set? :P


I resemble that remark.

It was a couple of tons of Britain's finest spanners, FWIW.

But that Sierra was the first car I ever drove, and in the best place to drive a car ever; an airfield attached to an army barracks.

Smell Of Reeves and Mortimer - The way we were
Youtube kokev4e-T-s

 
2017-04-15 08:06:37 PM  
Paddy used to love Reeves and Mortimer.

I mean, he's not dead, I think he still does.
 
2017-04-15 08:22:57 PM  

iron de havilland: Percise1: iron de havilland: Sierra XR4x4


Sure, but what did he steal, a crescent wrench and a socket set? :P

I resemble that remark.

It was a couple of tons of Britain's finest spanners, FWIW.

But that Sierra was the first car I ever drove, and in the best place to drive a car ever; an airfield attached to an army barracks.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/kokev4e-T-s - 480x360]


So you were singing a tender love song while you were doing it, now? To whom?

Your mention of spanners reminds me of a tale an old semen once told me about being in the navy. Seems the harbor he was stationed/working at had a problem with rampant tool theft, so one day the top brass announced that all facilities and quarters would be inspected the next day in search of... inventory. Apparently there were constant splashing noises from the harbor all night long, and his estimation was that by dawn, there was more metal in the bottom of the harbor than floating above it.
Wouldn't surprise me...
 
433 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2017-04-15 08:26:02 PM  

Percise1: Your mention of spanners reminds me of a tale an old semen once told me about being in the navy.


You may want to enter "seaman" into your native auto-correct before you tell this story again...
 
2017-04-15 08:26:50 PM  

Percise1: iron de havilland: Percise1: iron de havilland: Sierra XR4x4


Sure, but what did he steal, a crescent wrench and a socket set? :P

I resemble that remark.

It was a couple of tons of Britain's finest spanners, FWIW.

But that Sierra was the first car I ever drove, and in the best place to drive a car ever; an airfield attached to an army barracks.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/kokev4e-T-s - 480x360]

So you were singing a tender love song while you were doing it, now? To whom?

Your mention of spanners reminds me of a tale an old semen once told me about being in the navy. Seems the harbor he was stationed/working at had a problem with rampant tool theft, so one day the top brass announced that all facilities and quarters would be inspected the next day in search of... inventory. Apparently there were constant splashing noises from the harbor all night long, and his estimation was that by dawn, there was more metal in the bottom of the harbor than floating above it.
Wouldn't surprise me...


It's always difficult to find out what's going on when you have suspicious semen.
 
2017-04-15 08:29:25 PM  

433: Percise1: Your mention of spanners reminds me of a tale an old semen once told me about being in the navy.

You may want to enter "seaman" into your native auto-correct before you tell this story again...


Stop spoiling our fun, you bogan :P
 
2017-04-15 08:36:04 PM  

Percise1: iron de havilland: Percise1: iron de havilland: Sierra XR4x4


Sure, but what did he steal, a crescent wrench and a socket set? :P

I resemble that remark.

It was a couple of tons of Britain's finest spanners, FWIW.

But that Sierra was the first car I ever drove, and in the best place to drive a car ever; an airfield attached to an army barracks.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/kokev4e-T-s - 480x360]

So you were singing a tender love song while you were doing it, now? To whom?

Your mention of spanners reminds me of a tale an old semen once told me about being in the navy. Seems the harbor he was stationed/working at had a problem with rampant tool theft, so one day the top brass announced that all facilities and quarters would be inspected the next day in search of... inventory. Apparently there were constant splashing noises from the harbor all night long, and his estimation was that by dawn, there was more metal in the bottom of the harbor than floating above it.
Wouldn't surprise me...


Was it a crusty semen?
 
2017-04-15 08:43:19 PM  

And for all of you haters sending me bad thoughts, suck my carpets.

Bobby "Carpets" Mortimer hates laminate flooring
Youtube DMp8EY_I6X8



CARPETS!
 
433 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2017-04-15 08:59:07 PM  

iron de havilland: And for all of you haters sending me bad thoughts, suck my carpets.

[YouTube video]

CARPETS!


I loved that more than I should have - eapescially when he strums the roll of carpet like a guitar. What a strange room full of strange people.
 
2017-04-15 09:03:07 PM  

433: iron de havilland: And for all of you haters sending me bad thoughts, suck my carpets.

[YouTube video]

CARPETS!

I loved that more than I should have - eapescially when he strums the roll of carpet like a guitar. What a strange room full of strange people.


Thanks. Bobby's comedy partner, Jim, is perhaps more committed to the dadaist ideal, but Bob clearly just loves being paid for being an idiot.

And that's why it's so f*cking hilarious.
 
2017-04-15 09:06:22 PM  
I just ordered a couple of sets of The Smell of Reeves and Mortimer DVDs.

Because the internet doesn't have the John Lovejoy interview.

It's Bob with pen all over his face talking about his spiderman costume, apple theft, and corpsing badly.

It is most likely the most amusing thing I've ever seen.
 
2017-04-15 09:16:02 PM  

433: Percise1: Your mention of spanners reminds me of a tale an old semen once told me about being in the navy.

You may want to enter "seaman" into your native auto-correct before you tell this story again...


Why? They are pronounced the same. Not like it is tomato/tomato or something controversial. *shrug*

iron de havilland: It's always difficult to find out what's going on when you have suspicious semen.


Suspicious, perhaps... Disreputable, infamous and sordid for certain.

phlegmmo: Was it a crusty semen?


Definitely aged and a bit dehydrated, kind of leathery actually, but I think crusty would be a reach.
 
2017-04-15 09:43:37 PM  
I kinda admire the crackhead's gumption.
 
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