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(SanDiego UnionTribune)   Navy SEAL in trouble for unauthorized repeated deep infiltration and extraction missions   ( sandiegouniontribune.com) divider line
    More: Strange, United States Navy SEALs, Naval Special Warfare, Jade, porn megastar Jewels, Joseph John Schmidt, filming grandpa porn, estate company Schmidt, SEAL  
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9380 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Apr 2017 at 5:23 PM (31 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-04-15 04:02:25 PM  
His wife had some nice flotation devices there. Must come in handy at the office.
 
IP [TotalFark]
2017-04-15 04:30:18 PM  
Seal pr0n.  Sounds kinky.
 
2017-04-15 04:33:27 PM  
So, his wife blew a SEAL?
 
IP [TotalFark]
2017-04-15 04:40:49 PM  

Unobtanium: So, his wife blew a SEAL?


Fix the damn thing, and leave my private life out of it, okay, pal?

/just for the halibut
 
2017-04-15 05:27:05 PM  
That's not a good career move
 
2017-04-15 05:27:30 PM  
SEALed with a kiss?
 
2017-04-15 05:28:13 PM  
Shamu does Snu-Snu.
 
2017-04-15 05:29:31 PM  
So we get SEAL blabbermouths who go all over the media to reveal national security secrets but the brass wants to mess with this guy for laying some pipe on his private time.
 
2017-04-15 05:33:00 PM  
Navy SEAL in trouble for unauthorized repeated deep infiltration and extraction emissions

/fixed for no particular reason
 
2017-04-15 05:33:15 PM  
What makes me sad is that we underpay the most elite of our special forces soldiers, in that they have to moonlight as a porn star to make money. :-/

Who's admiral's wife found out about this anyway after looking through their Internet porn searches!?
 
2017-04-15 05:33:49 PM  
♫ There goes Joseph John Massive-Schlong Schmitt!
 
2017-04-15 05:33:52 PM  
Compare to:

This American Life about testosterone, where there's an interview with a woman who "transitioned" into being a man with the help of colossal doses of testosterone:

Griffin Hansbury: And I've gotten into a lot of arguments with women friends, coworkers who did not know about my past as a female. I call myself a post-feminist. And I had a woman say, you're not a post-feminist. You're a misogynist. And I said, that's impossible. I can't be a misogynist. I couldn't explain to her how I had come to this point in my life. And to her, I was just a misogynist. And that's unfortunate because it's a lot more complicated than that.
Alex Blumberg:[LAUGHTER] I'll say. Wow. Testosterone didn't just turn you into a man. It turned you into Rush Limbaugh.
Griffin Hansbury: I know. That I was not expecting. That I was not expecting. . . .
Alex Blumberg: Or something. Are there other ways- other than the visual and other than the libidinal, are there other ways that you feel like testosterone has altered the way you feel or perceive?
Griffin Hansbury: Something that happened after I started taking testosterone, I became interested in science. I was never interested in science before.
Alex Blumberg: No way. Come on. Are you serious?
Griffin Hansbury: I'm serious. I'm serious.
Alex Blumberg: You're just setting us back a hundred years, sir.
 
2017-04-15 05:34:40 PM  
FTFA: "Strippers Come Home Horny From the Club."

He should have made "Sailors Come Home Horny from Deployment" and had some of his SEAL buddies join in.
 
2017-04-15 05:36:16 PM  
The dude was banging his wife. Get over it, prudes.
 
2017-04-15 05:36:57 PM  
His wife looks like she's been through combat. Ewwww
 
2017-04-15 05:38:40 PM  
What an American morality tale... An underpaid Soldier with more property than he needs sends his wife out to do sex work to support their family as he participates in violent battles on foreign soil.  The man should be praised for doing something non-violent rather than selling his services to a private Mercenary outfit like Blackwater.

Unless he was doing that too.
 
2017-04-15 05:41:18 PM  

Unobtanium: So, his wife blew a SEAL?


I thought that used to be her job.

hola.com
 
2017-04-15 05:44:01 PM  
Being a SEAL makes you hard....get it...hard...yeah..ok...
 
2017-04-15 05:45:35 PM  
Sounds like someone in the Navy is harboring a grudge.
 
2017-04-15 05:54:04 PM  
"Navy officials said Schmidt did not fill out mandatory paperwork to seek clearance from his chain of command for work as a porn actor."

Wow, the military really has a form for everything.
 
2017-04-15 05:56:18 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-04-15 05:57:28 PM  

ChiliBoots: "Navy officials said Schmidt did not fill out mandatory paperwork to seek clearance from his chain of command for work as a porn actor."

Wow, the military really has a form for everything.


It's the C-ME-B469OK filled out in threesome.
 
2017-04-15 06:00:00 PM  

fragMasterFlash: The dude was banging his wife. Get over it, prudes.


Did you miss the sentence immediately after the one that said he mostly banged his wife?  The one that named a couple more pornstars he performed with?

Not that I care either, but the military has (or had) rules about that sort of thing.
 
2017-04-15 06:08:15 PM  
He just needed money for muffins.
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2017-04-15 06:08:39 PM  
That picture evokes Budweiser, cigarettes and Jean Nate
 
drp
2017-04-15 06:09:48 PM  

DarkSoulNoHope: What makes me sad is that we underpay the most elite of our special forces soldiers, in that they have to moonlight as a porn star to make money. :-/


Well ... he did run up $1.8 million in losses with a real estate flipping scheme he kicked off in 2005. Right before the housing crash.

Poor judgement, he has it.

He's got 3 problems
- The UCMJ still has a thing or two to say about adultery, believe it or not, and there's no fine print in there about it being OK if the spouse consents.
- Off duty employment without prior authorization. Moonlighting is limited for lots of reasons, most importantly that the military doesn't want its people rolling off the night shift (anywhere) and walking into work.
- The vague catch-all concerning conduct that reflects poorly on the service. Completely subjective, prone to abuse, and the last refuge of a military prosecutor who can't make a case otherwise.

It's all silly. But the simple fact is that you give up a lot of individual freedoms and rights when you join the military. You play these extracurricular games at your own peril.
 
2017-04-15 06:10:21 PM  
You would think that they'd sweep this one under the rug rather than face the inevitable "do I really have to fill out a form before I sell my home movies" lawsuit, which will likely cause the military to lose standing no matter what the outcome.
 
2017-04-15 06:11:38 PM  

Krieghund: fragMasterFlash: The dude was banging his wife. Get over it, prudes.

Did you miss the sentence immediately after the one that said he mostly banged his wife?  The one that named a couple more pornstars he performed with?

Not that I care either, but the military has (or had) rules about that sort of thing.


They could also have dealt with it quietly. If it's such a big f*cking deal just give him an honorable discharge and let him go on with his life.
 
2017-04-15 06:16:58 PM  

fragMasterFlash: The dude was banging his wife. Get over it, prudes.


They're both skanky scumbags. Marriage has nothing to do with it.
 
2017-04-15 06:21:07 PM  

macadamnut: fragMasterFlash: The dude was banging his wife. Get over it, prudes.

They're both skanky scumbags. Marriage has nothing to do with it.


Scumbags? From whence comes your high horse?
 
2017-04-15 06:22:20 PM  
So killing innocents okay but do some porn and we have a problem with it?
 
2017-04-15 06:23:10 PM  

Unobtanium: So, his wife blew a SEAL?


"No, it's ice cream."
 
2017-04-15 06:26:30 PM  
Getting laid  as a hobby shouldn't be an issue.

He just films it and the rest of us do it without the camera and pay.
 
2017-04-15 06:28:51 PM  

DarkSoulNoHope: What makes me sad is that we underpay the most elite of our special forces soldiers, in that they have to moonlight as a porn star to make money. :-/

Who's admiral's wife found out about this anyway after looking through their Internet porn searches!?


notsureifserious.jpg

I couldn't find an exact pay scale for his rank. but teh Googles tells me SEALs average about $54,000/yr with higher ranks earning considerably more.

$54k is about the median household salary. Ought to be able to live comfortably if not lavishly. I would guess it is as likely as not these two were earning very nice incomes but still living way beyond their means.
 
2017-04-15 06:31:46 PM  

mrlewish: So killing innocents okay but do some porn and we have a problem with it?


Innocents?  I see that the annoying SJWs have arrived.
 
2017-04-15 06:33:53 PM  

Unobtanium: So, his wife blew a SEAL?


Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

img.fark.net

[Deep Breath]

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
 
2017-04-15 06:40:13 PM  
With porn and multiple guys "writing" books claiming to be the REAL killer of Osama bin laden perhaps we should rename the SEALs as "the ARISTOCRATS".
 
2017-04-15 06:41:02 PM  

Bslim: So we get SEAL blabbermouths who go all over the media to reveal national security secrets but the brass wants to mess with this guy for laying some pipe on his private time.


In fairness, most of the SEAL blabbermouths who go on TV were never actually in in SEALs.  It is a lot easier to pretend you were a member of a semi-secretive elite military group, then to actually get on one.
 
2017-04-15 06:42:20 PM  
"The armed forces punished the women with involuntary discharges"

I bet they did.
 
2017-04-15 06:43:39 PM  
Jay Voom? Really? Come on now, a SEAL should call himself something a little more manly, like Carlos Danger.
 
2017-04-15 06:45:04 PM  

zeppo_shemp: $54k is about the median household salary


Is housing and health insurance included in that?
 
2017-04-15 06:45:41 PM  
You can't go after the military men doing gay porn without going after this guy too, I imagine.
 
2017-04-15 06:46:57 PM  

The_Sponge: mrlewish: So killing innocents okay but do some porn and we have a problem with it?

Innocents?  I see that the annoying SJWs have arrived.


You know, I would not have thought that someone would decide that what this story needs is yet another person fellating the military.  And yet here we are.

Believe it or not, there are people that don't consider collateral damage such as weddings, hospitals, and churches 'acceptable' regardless of modern doctrine on the subject.  I don't entirely agree, while I find it regrettable, well, regrettable is pretty much the entire nature of war.  With that said, if I had to pick someone to label 'annoying', it'd be the hoorah jizzfactories who try to whitewash that at the merest mention.
 
2017-04-15 06:48:59 PM  

Bslim: So we get SEAL blabbermouths who go all over the media to reveal national security secrets but the brass wants to mess with this guy for laying some pipe on his private time.


Exactly.
 
2017-04-15 06:51:10 PM  
*checks pictures*

EW. That's nasty looking folk.
 
2017-04-15 06:52:54 PM  

zeppo_shemp: DarkSoulNoHope: What makes me sad is that we underpay the most elite of our special forces soldiers, in that they have to moonlight as a porn star to make money. :-/

Who's admiral's wife found out about this anyway after looking through their Internet porn searches!?

notsureifserious.jpg

I couldn't find an exact pay scale for his rank. but teh Googles tells me SEALs average about $54,000/yr with higher ranks earning considerably more.

$54k is about the median household salary. Ought to be able to live comfortably if not lavishly. I would guess it is as likely as not these two were earning very nice incomes but still living way beyond their means.


In San Diego, that'll "buy" you a place to put your tent in some shady industrial area.
 
2017-04-15 06:54:15 PM  
Penny Benjamin?
 
2017-04-15 06:58:13 PM  
All you need to know is, what would GI Joe do?
cdn.meme.am
 
2017-04-15 07:04:45 PM  
He should have filled out the form with "pipe-fitter'
 
2017-04-15 07:05:34 PM  
FTFA: Schmidt is also Jay Voom, the actor in at least 29 porn flicks during the past seven years, from "Apple Smashing Lap Dance" to "Strippers Come Home Horny From the Club."

img.fark.net
Nominated for nine Academy Awards!
 
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