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(C|Net)   Army may draft gamers   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
•       •       •

21455 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 May 2004 at 3:55 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

154 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-05-14 04:04:40 PM  
I have only one thing to say about this.....
[image from too old to be available]
2004-05-14 04:04:46 PM  
No way, I bet those terrorists use Game Sharks or some other cheats.
2004-05-14 04:05:31 PM  
If the game is Dance Dance Revolution, I'll be a Colonel.

/gay, asian teenager at the mall
2004-05-14 04:05:48 PM  
So if you pick up backpacks/healthkits/armour you get better right? How will I incorporate my wallhack and aimbot into this?
2004-05-14 04:06:15 PM  
Isn't this alot like saying that people who play Dungeons and Dragons would make good spies because of their role playing skills though?
2004-05-14 04:06:40 PM  
Man, the part Bobby's really going to hate is when they stick his head in that machine so he has that matching "pyramid-style".
2004-05-14 04:06:56 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-05-14 04:06:56 PM  
mykie - funny post, disturbing, but funny

CatPorn - for cannon fodder it don't matter, healthy or not.

Obdicut - true and funny.
2004-05-14 04:08:24 PM  
Thank you, Bill Lumbergh. I will definitely start using "That's your penis talking, son. Says he's proud of ya." in conversations.
2004-05-14 04:08:44 PM  
i agree that twitch games increase eye/hand coordination but an M4A1 weighs alot more than an optical mouse.
2004-05-14 04:08:50 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-05-14 04:09:33 PM  
I wonder if people will start breaking thier thumbs to get out of the draft?
2004-05-14 04:09:38 PM  
I can just see someone calling the terrorists, "Camping Noobs!"

/probably only funny much much after the fact
2004-05-14 04:09:45 PM  
Uhoh, I've done pretty good in the America's Army game. I need to log on for a few days and do a ton of team killing to dodge the draft.
2004-05-14 04:09:49 PM  
Captain: You are awarded with this Army Achievement Medal.
Soldier: But...I singlehandedly infiltrated and destroyed this entire regiment of enemy troops! Here are the papers you asked for!
Captain:Yes, thank you. But you didn't retrieve the golden Ankh of Anubis or collect any holy items or use Painkiller only or survive with no armor or find any of the secrets! Drink water and drive on!
Soldier: I wonder if the Navy is hiring...
2004-05-14 04:09:51 PM  
Darn you, Bill Lumbergh! I was putting that strip in my Photobucket account so I could post it here. Guess I'm too slow on the draw, thus making me a poor soldier. :p
2004-05-14 04:10:23 PM  
I only play chess. I'm f*cked.
2004-05-14 04:12:02 PM  
Will I be able to run around a maze, avoiding technacolor ghosts, while eating some little pills?
2004-05-14 04:12:07 PM  
Wizzin You must mean "Inexperienced Players Using Tactics"
2004-05-14 04:13:02 PM  
*grenade falls into the soldier's trench*

soldier: They set us up the bomb!!

*soldier blows up*

terrorist: All your base are belong to us!
2004-05-14 04:13:28 PM  
well they did retrofit all those bradleys and mounted missile arrays with off-the-shelf PS2 controllers...

/not a joke
2004-05-14 04:13:39 PM  
Everyone knows that General Discussion is superior in every way.
2004-05-14 04:13:44 PM  
"Man, this game sucks, you only get one life"
2004-05-14 04:13:55 PM  
"Wizzin You must mean "Inexperienced Players Using Tactics""

Damn campers.

2004-05-14 04:14:04 PM  
Yvan eht nioj.
2004-05-14 04:14:32 PM  
"...the terrorists are nubs"

-leet haxor circa 2002 a.d.
2004-05-14 04:14:39 PM  
Oh, and I play XCom alot.
Guess that means I'm headed for command school.

/make room andrew wiggin, you pussy.
2004-05-14 04:14:42 PM  
Hold on! I gotta pause to get another Mountain Dew!
2004-05-14 04:14:56 PM  

Way Joke.
2004-05-14 04:15:22 PM  
Its actually a pretty fun game and less jackholes than Counterstrike.

Some of the training is downright HI-larious. To be able to play a medic in the game you have to actually have your character sit in a series of classes that teach basic real-world first aid (how to properly dress wounds, make tourniquets, etc), then you have to pass a test afterwards. The absolute best thing though is if you walk around the hospital between the classes and listen to the idle chit-chat of the army nurses. They totally glorify the benefits of being in the Army ("I'm going to the PX to buy a new TV after my shift", "Those prices can't be beat!" and such).
2004-05-14 04:16:02 PM  
Not only is this story ancient, but the submitter is forgetting one thing...there currently is NO DRAFT in America.

C'mon, folks, a little basic research here...
2004-05-14 04:16:10 PM  
What do you mean the enemy is to poor to support head sets?

I'm out.
2004-05-14 04:16:19 PM  
Well no-one goes for the other liquid generation 'gotchas' anymore ;p
2004-05-14 04:16:37 PM  
Hey, I'll join.

When they give me my Yamamoto gun.
2004-05-14 04:17:52 PM  
Fark may repeat articles
2004-05-14 04:17:52 PM  
Just as marshmallows pwn chesnuts, so does R&R pwn general....
[image from too old to be available]
2004-05-14 04:19:02 PM  
Oh wait, it was the Yamamoto cannon.

Haven't played that game in a long time.
2004-05-14 04:19:44 PM  
I second the motion to take the weird guy off the personals there. He's been there for like 3 days. very creepy.
2004-05-14 04:20:09 PM  
Ready to server. Time to put them Unreal Tournament skilz to work.
2004-05-14 04:20:31 PM  
2004-05-14 04:19:44 PM Extreme_Lukewarm

Yeah is is freaking me out too. Can't the mods change this to a farkette?
2004-05-14 04:22:41 PM  
AA used to filter the word "camp", it was changed to "use tactics"

so if i typed in, "Hey, lets play Insurgent Camp" it would come up "Hey, lets play Insurgent use tactics"
2004-05-14 04:23:36 PM  
Before battle... do we get to take some time to swap mp3z and pr0n with the opponents? Oh wait - they don't have mp3z or pr0n... onto the killin!
2004-05-14 04:25:33 PM  
may the video game gods smite me for my error.

the proper quote is;

"somebody set up us the bomb."
2004-05-14 04:25:33 PM  

I wish I hadn't, but yes I watched the video. I think sawing is the word I would use to describe it. It didn't look to me like this was the first decapitation these scumbags had been a part of.
2004-05-14 04:25:35 PM  
And when the platoon full of gamers gets wiped out, the generals will say "DMN N00BZ!!11!!"
2004-05-14 04:26:54 PM  
Good ref with "The Last Starfighter." I saw that movie so many times... Have you ever made yourself hoarse after trying to imitate Grig's laugh?
/child of the 80's
2004-05-14 04:27:40 PM  
no Zerg rush?
2004-05-14 04:27:45 PM  
You mean I get to blow shiat up for real...dude, sign me up.

/not a gamer + I'm really old

2004-05-14 04:27:55 PM  
Find in this Page: draft
The text you entered was not found.

Hrm... imagine that.
2004-05-14 04:28:19 PM  
Wouldn't pass the physicals.
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