Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(BBC-US)   Beijing park clamps down on excess toilet roll usage with....*shakes magic 8-ball*... facial recognition   ( bbc.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, toilet paper, Toilet, toilet paper dispensers, loo roll, free toilet paper, toilet paper supply, park, loo roll home  
•       •       •

2437 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2017 at 10:20 AM (21 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-03-20 09:08:08 AM  
Wow, that's pretty sophisticated.  I'm a little impressed they have TP in their toilets based on what I've heard of Chinese toilet habits (or lack thereof)
 
2017-03-20 09:08:29 AM  
show your face to the camera, or a smartphone picture of a face to the camera, or something that vaguely looks like a face to the camera...
 
2017-03-20 09:20:31 AM  
Look, sometimes you don't know how much you need until you're done with the process. How's that going to work?

img.fark.net
 
2017-03-20 09:20:59 AM  
Who would be so cheap as to steal scratchy toilet paper. Some people must be taking the bog roll home instead of buying their own.
 
2017-03-20 10:21:47 AM  
Man, am I glad that said facial.
 
2017-03-20 10:21:49 AM  
Now if they would only do that with concrete. Or fossil fuels.
 
2017-03-20 10:23:14 AM  

quijji: Man, am I glad that said facial.


Yep, I read that the same way.
 
2017-03-20 10:28:06 AM  
Don't they all look alike over there?
 
2017-03-20 10:29:49 AM  
If it's yellow, let it mellow.  If it's brown, arrest it.
 
2017-03-20 10:30:16 AM  
Look, Ming, sometimes after a dinner of General Zho's chicken it takes multiple wipes to feel springtime fresh. Or, would you prefer to shake the bare hand that just wiped my ass?
 
2017-03-20 10:30:54 AM  

sithon: Who would be so cheap as to steal scratchy toilet paper. Some people must be taking the bog roll home instead of buying their own.


This is what was happening in one of the university dorms that I worked at during college.  Several of the Chinese international students were going into the public toilets with trash can, spinning the whole roll into it, placing beside the toilet in their suite, and using that instead of going out and buying some.
/not getting into the students who used the trash can as a toilet (custom) or those who stood on the seat when pooping
 
2017-03-20 10:31:31 AM  

blatz514: quijji: Man, am I glad that said facial.

Yep, I read that the same way.


What did you think it was fecal? Also speaking of public restrooms and facial. Yeah, there's a punch line there some place.
 
2017-03-20 10:38:27 AM  

Ambivalence: Wow, that's pretty sophisticated.  I'm a little impressed they have TP in their toilets based on what I've heard of Chinese toilet habits (or lack thereof)


Yeah, being a former resident of said city, I'm having a hard time imagining anything remotely high tech (forget clean) in their public bathrooms.  I have nightmares about those bathrooms.

One of the more amusing visits was me walking into a public bathroom (typically filthy) there were two squat toliets with absolutely no walls or stalls which was disconcerting.  But even further, the "toliets" were occupied by these two dudes squatting side by side doing their business no more than a foot from each other.  And while taking their collective crap both were yapping to each other like it's lunch or a smoking break.
 
2017-03-20 10:38:52 AM  

ChipNASA: blatz514: quijji: Man, am I glad that said facial.

Yep, I read that the same way.

What did you think it was fecal? Also speaking of public restrooms and facial. Yeah, there's a punch line there some place.


Fecal recognition.  "I don't remember eating corn yesterday."
 
2017-03-20 10:43:42 AM  
The ghost of Chuck Berry says: "Legal bathroom cameras? Why couldn't I have lived a couple more days?"
 
2017-03-20 10:48:23 AM  
I dont have a square to spare.
 
2017-03-20 10:49:24 AM  
What a colossal waste of money.  Facial recognition toilet paper dispensing hardware plus staff on hand to explain the technology versus buying some more toilet paper?  Somebody's brother owns the company that makes such devices.  I usually read 'feces' when I see 'faces' but don't really have a problem with 'facial' becoming 'fecal'.  Too many letter changes needed.
 
2017-03-20 11:05:21 AM  
Surprised they'd do that in China.  A little voice would come on and say "Did someone blink?  Try again to receive 3 squares."
 
2017-03-20 11:20:59 AM  
CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.
 
OOF
2017-03-20 11:23:32 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-03-20 11:27:46 AM  
Read that as fecal recognition.
 
2017-03-20 11:48:25 AM  

maxandgrinch: Read that as fecal recognition.


Now that would make this a gem of a headline!
 
2017-03-20 11:49:30 AM  

Jclark666: To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper.

 
2017-03-20 12:21:23 PM  
Cheaper solution: (not sure if they have any hardened for public loos, however)

img.fark.net
 
2017-03-20 12:39:11 PM  

Jclark666: CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.


I don't get it. What was the problem?
 
2017-03-20 12:43:18 PM  

Ambivalence: Wow, that's pretty sophisticated.  I'm a little impressed they have TP in their toilets based on what I've heard of Chinese toilet habits (or lack thereof)


Been to several parks around Beijing, and most of them I would swear don't have p-traps in their plumbing. Even when they look fairly clean, some of them smell worse than the monkey house at the zoo.
 
2017-03-20 12:43:53 PM  
Why the nine-minute wait to get more?  Do they figure that nine minutes is the minimum time it takes to make a sudden, surprising, supplemental poop?  Did they do a study on this?
 
2017-03-20 12:45:19 PM  

destrip: Cheaper solution: (not sure if they have any hardened for public loos, however)

[img.fark.net image 700x467]


<-doesn't want to know what you did to get a toilet to squirt
 
2017-03-20 01:00:12 PM  

X-Geek: Jclark666: CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.

I don't get it. What was the problem?


I feel like the punchline was forgotten.
 
2017-03-20 01:09:08 PM  

SirEattonHogg: Ambivalence: Wow, that's pretty sophisticated.  I'm a little impressed they have TP in their toilets based on what I've heard of Chinese toilet habits (or lack thereof)

Yeah, being a former resident of said city, I'm having a hard time imagining anything remotely high tech (forget clean) in their public bathrooms.  I have nightmares about those bathrooms.

One of the more amusing visits was me walking into a public bathroom (typically filthy) there were two squat toliets with absolutely no walls or stalls which was disconcerting.  But even further, the "toliets" were occupied by these two dudes squatting side by side doing their business no more than a foot from each other.  And while taking their collective crap both were yapping to each other like it's lunch or a smoking break.


A while back there was a story about a Chinese woman on a plane with her 2 year old and that, rather than take him to the toilet, laid out newspaper on the plane seat for him to defecate on.  In that story I heard all kinds of things about how, in many places in China, it's perfectly okay to drop trow and pop a squat in public, even on the subway and in malls.  People were talking about how that was a point of contention between people from China, mainlanders, and people from Hong Kong because the British put a LOT of effort into breaking Hong Kong residents from that habit and that people from Hong Kong now consider mainlanders kind of barbaric for still doing it.
 
2017-03-20 01:23:30 PM  
tse4.mm.bing.net
Here is your ration citizen. Make it last.
 
2017-03-20 01:25:38 PM  

Ambivalence: SirEattonHogg: Ambivalence: Wow, that's pretty sophisticated.  I'm a little impressed they have TP in their toilets based on what I've heard of Chinese toilet habits (or lack thereof)

Yeah, being a former resident of said city, I'm having a hard time imagining anything remotely high tech (forget clean) in their public bathrooms.  I have nightmares about those bathrooms.

One of the more amusing visits was me walking into a public bathroom (typically filthy) there were two squat toliets with absolutely no walls or stalls which was disconcerting.  But even further, the "toliets" were occupied by these two dudes squatting side by side doing their business no more than a foot from each other.  And while taking their collective crap both were yapping to each other like it's lunch or a smoking break.

A while back there was a story about a Chinese woman on a plane with her 2 year old and that, rather than take him to the toilet, laid out newspaper on the plane seat for him to defecate on.  In that story I heard all kinds of things about how, in many places in China, it's perfectly okay to drop trow and pop a squat in public, even on the subway and in malls.  People were talking about how that was a point of contention between people from China, mainlanders, and people from Hong Kong because the British put a LOT of effort into breaking Hong Kong residents from that habit and that people from Hong Kong now consider mainlanders kind of barbaric for still doing it.


Unfortunately I've seen the public pooping a few times.  The parents spread the newspaper in the middle of a very busy outdoor public mall.  They pull the pants down on the kid and the kid poops in full of all the walking past pedestrians.  And often these aren't toodlers but maybe primary school age kids.

I've heard the British made a big effort of stopping public spitting and getting people to queue up... so much so that Hong Kongers are fanatical about lining up and its rare to see anyone spitting (unless they are mainlanders) and it's socially frowned upon. Never heard about public pooping being an issue.  I suppose that may have been an issue, but I'd guess that would be something back in the 60's and and maybe earlier when a lot of infrastructure was still being built to meet the needs of a rapidly increasing population.
 
2017-03-20 01:31:42 PM  
I visited Beijing for work last year and spent a lot of time in "local" places - factories and public areas rather than Western hotels or restaurants.

Public restroom conditions range from questionable to horrid, and the hole in the tile is difficult to hit while squatting, but it can be done. The smell of sewage and amonia can be overwhelming. Sometimes there's paper, and sometimes there's not. Unless you're visiting modern facilities, I suggest bringing your own paper.
 
2017-03-20 01:57:56 PM  
MILITARY Butt Wiping.

 
2017-03-20 02:16:49 PM  

wingedkat: X-Geek: Jclark666: CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.

I don't get it. What was the problem?

I feel like the punchline was forgotten.


Phone typing sucks and punctuation and spelling went out the window along halves of sentences that included helpful phrases like "...in a basket next to the toilet." and "...with a huge grin on his face." Sigh. Let me tldr; it for you:

Due to a cultural misunderstanding, my asshole boss wiped his ass with used toilet paper, never realized it, and was so favorably impressed by the experience that he commented aloud on it.

(I actually think the Chinese might have been more worried about him having flushed toilet paper than his admirable dedication to recycling. I saw a couple concerned-looking maintenance guys head in there a few minutes later.)
 
2017-03-20 02:23:43 PM  

X-Geek: Jclark666: CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.

I don't get it. What was the problem?


His boss was using used toilet paper to wipe his ass. He thought those little bundles of to were set out as a courtesy. In reality that was used to rapped up to cut down on the smell
 
2017-03-20 02:26:50 PM  

sithon: X-Geek: Jclark666: CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.

I don't get it. What was the problem?

His boss was using used toilet paper to wipe his ass. He thought those little bundles of to were set out as a courtesy. In reality that was used to rapped up to cut down on the smell


Damn autocorrect. TP not To
 
2017-03-20 02:29:03 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-03-20 02:42:36 PM  

bighairyguy: If it's yellow, let it mellow.  If it's brown, arrest it.


That's racist?
 
2017-03-20 02:57:11 PM  

ChipNASA: MILITARY Butt Wiping.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/JofDuTmFpL8 - 480x360]


The way I was told, the "Ranger Wipe" uses the napkin from an MRE which is folded in half and a little piece from the middle is ripped out to get under your fingernail after.  Haven't tried it myself, but then again we stay in hotels with lots and lots of TP...darn.
 
2017-03-20 03:01:37 PM  

Oreminer: sithon: Who would be so cheap as to steal scratchy toilet paper. Some people must be taking the bog roll home instead of buying their own.

This is what was happening in one of the university dorms that I worked at during college.  Several of the Chinese international students were going into the public toilets with trash can, spinning the whole roll into it, placing beside the toilet in their suite, and using that instead of going out and buying some.
/not getting into the students who used the trash can as a toilet (custom) or those who stood on the seat when pooping


jeez why would they go through all that trouble? It's so easy to just break into the things and grab the whole roll

/I was a very cheap college student
//thats what you get for setting up the female co ops with jobs that pay less
 
2017-03-20 03:01:42 PM  
How am I supposed to properly wipe my ass now?

s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2017-03-20 03:03:07 PM  

bighairyguy: If it's yellow, let it mellow.  If it's brown, arrest it.


media.cagle.com
 
2017-03-20 03:14:18 PM  
Oh thank god, I was looking for a fart thread. So it hit me all of a sudden and I was rushing up the stairs to the bathroom - when the farts just started coming out, uninvited. That was bad enough, but then I realized the stairwell was an echo chamber of Yuuuuge proportions.  So now I'm trying to navigate stairs as my ass explodes while looking around at the same time hoping nobody heard me! It's a god damn miracle I didn't fall down the stairs. Somebody's knocking, gotta go!
 
2017-03-20 03:20:18 PM  

Jclark666: I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole


Showoff
 
2017-03-20 03:25:51 PM  

trappedspirit: What a colossal waste of money.  Facial recognition toilet paper dispensing hardware plus staff on hand to explain the technology versus buying some more toilet paper?  Somebody's brother owns the company that makes such devices.  I usually read 'feces' when I see 'faces' but don't really have a problem with 'facial' becoming 'fecal'.  Too many letter changes needed.


My reading of TFA is, they probably already have it all over the place anyway, and are looking for an excuse to sneak it into the bathroom.
 
2017-03-20 03:34:08 PM  
Loo-ee loo-ee, we gotta go. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah...
 
2017-03-20 04:40:29 PM  

Jclark666: wingedkat: X-Geek: Jclark666: CSB: The sewage infrastructure in many Chinese cities has not kept pace with growth. As a result, the sewage systems are overloaded, and citizens are prohibited from even putting toilet paper in the toilet. To encourage this, public toilets have the toilet paper near the door and baskets in the stalls four the paper. To avoid everything smelling like shiat, people would wrap their used sheets in the middle of some fresh sheets. I was at one of our plants in Xiamen with my incredible asshole of a boss, when he went into the bathroom, and comes out a few minutes later. Not only was there a Western toilet in there, but instead of a roll, they provide a stack of neatly folded bundles of paper in a basket! Watching the ashen look spread from the translator's face to the rest of the Chinese , and the back and forth glances ad they decided not to say anything, was one of the greatest experiences of my life. I kept my mouth shut, too, but I was dying inside. I wish I'd told him during my exit interview.

I don't get it. What was the problem?

I feel like the punchline was forgotten.

Phone typing sucks and punctuation and spelling went out the window along halves of sentences that included helpful phrases like "...in a basket next to the toilet." and "...with a huge grin on his face." Sigh. Let me tldr; it for you:

Due to a cultural misunderstanding, my asshole boss wiped his ass with used toilet paper, never realized it, and was so favorably impressed by the experience that he commented aloud on it.

(I actually think the Chinese might have been more worried about him having flushed toilet paper than his admirable dedication to recycling. I saw a couple concerned-looking maintenance guys head in there a few minutes later.)


Oh, wow.  That's... amazing.
 
2017-03-20 09:12:21 PM  

chuckdelux: Public restroom conditions range from questionable to horrid, and the hole in the tile is difficult to hit while squatting, but it can be done. The smell of sewage and amonia can be overwhelming. Sometimes there's paper, and sometimes there's not. Unless you're visiting modern facilities, I suggest bringing your own paper.


And in many high volume places you'll find an old woman outside the toilets selling packets of toilet paper.
 
Displayed 49 of 49 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.

In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report