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(IndyStar)   Police investigating case of assault with deadly cheeseburger   ( indystar.com) divider line
    More: Fail, daughter, Passenger, Hamburger, Officer Aaron Hamer, Indianapolis, Death growl, Family, Vinegar  
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4822 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2017 at 7:00 AM (21 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



22 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-03-20 06:25:34 AM  
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2017-03-20 07:03:49 AM  
The alleged weapon is suspected to be a Big Mac10.
 
OOF
2017-03-20 07:06:14 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-03-20 07:11:44 AM  
Slider from White Castle?
 
2017-03-20 07:29:06 AM  
I beet the holidays are a hoot over there
 
2017-03-20 07:36:48 AM  
A cheeseburger is a terrible thing to waste. Next time just shoot the b*tch.
 
2017-03-20 07:48:13 AM  
Nothing deadly subby. It was just a assault. A delicious assault.
 
2017-03-20 08:26:35 AM  
"The victim stated her daughter yelled 'B---h I outta kill you' and hit her in the left side of her face with her hand and the cheeseburger."

And the mom didn't want the daughter staying at her house any more, I wonder why.
 
2017-03-20 08:32:34 AM  
The last few lines were a detailed description of that the police found. Mustard and ketchup on her shirt. Pickles and onions scattered across the interior of the car.

Am I a bad man because that made me laugh? Food fight!

/But no it was a serious assault and I hope the daughter gets some serious intervention
//Not that you really help an asshole like that.
 
2017-03-20 08:45:23 AM  
'See you in hell, Jimmy Buffett!'
 
2017-03-20 08:49:28 AM  
Good thing it wasn't a Taco Bell. The carnage would have been beyond mortal comprehension.
 
2017-03-20 09:00:53 AM  

idrow: "The victim stated her daughter yelled 'B---h I outta kill you' and hit her in the left side of her face with her hand and the cheeseburger."

And the mom didn't want the daughter staying at her house any more, I wonder why.


It also mentions other passengers in the car. Probably the ungrateful biatch's children.
 
2017-03-20 09:09:08 AM  
NSCSB: I once got arrested for accidentally/inadvertently hitting a mall security guard in the face with a french fry. Spent a few hours in the local pokey before the arresting officer called his super and told him they were letting me go. Best child's birthday ever.
 
2017-03-20 09:18:27 AM  

grinding_journalist: NSCSB: I once got arrested for accidentally/inadvertently hitting a mall security guard in the face with a french fry. Spent a few hours in the local pokey before the arresting officer called his super and told him they were letting me go. Best child's birthday ever.


Why's that? Did you let the kid go, too?
 
2017-03-20 09:39:15 AM  

Gyrfalcon: Good thing it wasn't a Taco Bell. The carnage would have been beyond mortal comprehension.


Carnage asada
 
2017-03-20 09:43:40 AM  
The dynamics of that relationship are not lost on me.

SIL and her eldest daughter are a running train wreck of drugs, enabling, obesity, prison, public assistance, out of wedlock babies, mental illness, identity theft, broken down cars, health issues, poor finances, and victims.
 
2017-03-20 09:54:13 AM  
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2017-03-20 09:59:49 AM  

Freakin Rican: Nothing deadly subby. It was just a assault. A delicious assault.


RTFA again. The cheeseburger didn't survive the attack.
 
2017-03-20 11:59:09 AM  
Quarter pounder with cheese
 
2017-03-20 02:37:53 PM  
 
2017-03-21 12:16:56 AM  
Jeez, not ONE mention on how to defend against someone armed withe this? Fark I am disappoint.

/without a gun
//or 16-ton weight.
 
2017-03-21 03:39:22 PM  

People_are_Idiots: Jeez, not ONE mention on how to defend against someone armed withe this? Fark I am disappoint.

/without a gun
//or 16-ton weight.


We'll get to that, but FIRST, how to defend your self from an assailant armed with a banana.  Simple, release the Bengal Tigers!
 
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