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(Daily Mail)   Artie Lange arrested for paying tribute to John Belushi   ( dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Fail, Dailymail.com Reporter, EDT  
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5369 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 17 Mar 2017 at 5:20 PM (22 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2017-03-17 04:40:04 PM  
I was gonna submit a headline and make a similar joke with either Belushi or Chris Farley. Fat comedians and speedballs don't mix. He's on the HBO show Crashing playing himself and he hired a guy to make sure he didn't do any drugs.
 
2017-03-17 04:43:49 PM  
To be honest, I kind of just assumed he had already died at some point and I missed it.
 
2017-03-17 05:22:55 PM  
He can still afford heroin and cocaine? Color me surprised.
 
2017-03-17 05:28:13 PM  

Action Replay Nick: To be honest, I kind of just assumed he had already died at some point and I missed it.


I thought he had cleaned up after he almost died a few years back.  If hes using again Im surprised hes alive at 49 and at his weight. Not hating by any means, I hope he cleans up.
 
2017-03-17 05:32:50 PM  
Look at you. You baby gorilla.
 
2017-03-17 05:35:47 PM  
Go Hoboken!

:D
 
2017-03-17 05:38:29 PM  
I'd trade Lange for River Phoenix's skeletal remains.  Phoenix, in present state, is still funnier and more articulate.
 
2017-03-17 05:44:53 PM  

Action Replay Nick: To be honest, I kind of just assumed he had already died at some point and I missed it.


His career certainly did.
 
2017-03-17 05:45:35 PM  
68.media.tumblr.com
 
2017-03-17 05:49:54 PM  
img.fark.net

Very interesting... but stupid!
 
2017-03-17 05:53:57 PM  
how can a heroin and coke addict be so fat?  it doesn't make sense!
 
2017-03-17 06:05:47 PM  

SirDigbyChickenCaesar: how can a heroin and coke addict be so fat?  it doesn't make sense!


marcmyers.typepad.com

It's been done before.
 
2017-03-17 06:12:16 PM  

SirDigbyChickenCaesar: how can a heroin and coke addict be so fat?  it doesn't make sense!


Grandma's broccoli rabe.
 
2017-03-17 06:15:17 PM  
I saw him at a Jim Norton show in AC like a year after his seppuku attempt. It was BAD. He was noticably uncomfortable and in pain. A girl at the end of the show stood up and yelled I LOVE YOU ARTY!!!!

Arty: what's wrong with you you stupid biatch? I'm a disgusting mess (or something extremely similar)

It was his biggest laugh of the night. Sad, but funny.
 
2017-03-17 06:15:22 PM  
CsB

I used to live in that complex, he lived in a building called the Constitution IIRC. I saw him a couple times. He looked terrible, and this was about 10 years ago.
 
2017-03-17 06:17:30 PM  

Action Replay Nick: To be honest, I kind of just assumed he had already died at some point and I missed it.


Its usually the addicts who quit who ended up dying. Their heart can't take the shock.
 
2017-03-17 06:22:47 PM  
asknetworth.com
you naughty girl
 
2017-03-17 06:31:38 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-03-17 06:35:51 PM  
I never knew the back story of why he was on the Stern show.  I remember the first time he appeared, i assumed he was a guy they literally pulled in off the street for the schtick of it.

But thats why it worked. Though, i never found him remotely witty or talented, he was just a real dude.  He never tried to make it about himself, whenever he spoke.  He served the show so i respected him being there.

Hope he gets cleaned up....
 
2017-03-17 06:35:55 PM  
The 49-year-old comedian was found in possession of heroine and cocaine in the parking garage of his apartment complex in Hoboken, New Jersey.

Maybe he had a cold.
 
2017-03-17 06:43:55 PM  
tse1.mm.bing.net
Take it from me, kids - Stay away from drugs.
And don't ever play with guns.
 
2017-03-17 06:51:11 PM  
He rose to fame on The Howard Stern Show in 2009

WRONG.

He started on the show in 2001, after Jackie left.
F Jackie.
 
2017-03-17 07:28:21 PM  

T.rex: I never knew the back story of why he was on the Stern show.  I remember the first time he appeared, i assumed he was a guy they literally pulled in off the street for the schtick of it.

But thats why it worked. Though, i never found him remotely witty or talented, he was just a real dude.  He never tried to make it about himself, whenever he spoke.  He served the show so i respected him being there.

Hope he gets cleaned up....


This.  As Stern turned into "Hampton Howie", Artie was the last blue collar link on the show.  He was famous but low level enough to be the voice of the average fan.   Howard always made me laugh but the Artie years are my faaaavourite.  If he doesn't right himself, I fear we may lose the Baby Gorilla before the year is done.
 
2017-03-17 07:31:11 PM  

gunsmack: SirDigbyChickenCaesar: how can a heroin and coke addict be so fat?  it doesn't make sense!

[marcmyers.typepad.com image 390x262]

It's been done before.


Yeah, but he ate Joni Mitchell.
 
2017-03-17 07:32:11 PM  
I thought the self-righteousness in the comments below the article was bad. Fark is usually better than that. But not today.
 
2017-03-17 07:32:45 PM  
Should have been a sad tag
 
2017-03-17 07:43:59 PM  
i1079.photobucket.com
 
2017-03-17 08:04:31 PM  
so many people who have gifts pay for them dearly. the gods love our tears, they are cruel and unjust.
 
2017-03-17 08:10:36 PM  

Sin_City_Superhero: He can still afford heroin and cocaine? Color me surprised.


Net worth of ~12M will at least get you some.
 
2017-03-17 08:32:29 PM  
Artie Lange looks and sounds like the floor of a very used New York taxicab, but fatter. Much, much fatter.

And no, I never found him funny. Being rude and obscene isn't terribly humorous once you've climbed out of the primordial ooze and evolved a prefrontal cortex.
 
2017-03-17 08:38:17 PM  
Artie fans or former fans know the routine well.  He's always lying and always using.  The only remarkable thing is that he still hasn't died. He's a completely unreliable and often funny performer.  His chief flaw is not so much the drugs (which, yes, will get him dead eventually) but unremitting laziness.  His modus operandi is driving away those who like him, especially fans, whom he respects even less than himself.

So, whatever.

He will be fondly remembered as driving the last era during which the Stern show was funny.  It withered and comedically died within two years of his departure, never to recover.

/never saw him live
/no longer care to
 
2017-03-17 08:42:22 PM  
It's not you. In addition to two unstable versions of Artie Lange's death, there have been five iterations, or cycles, of Artie Lange's death. In each stable iteration, an incarnation of him in St. Louis at the Funnybone has appeared. Artie is the sixth Artie to appear at the Funnybone in St. Louis in this sixth Artie Lange's death iteration.
 
2017-03-17 08:56:46 PM  
That just makes me sad. I met him once. He was sweet and funny and a little pervy (but entirely non-threatening, it was just fun) and I hate to see him struggling. I genuinely like him. :/
 
2017-03-17 09:01:53 PM  
The 49-year-old comedian was found in possession of heroine and cocaine in the parking garage of his apartment complex in Hoboken, New Jersey.


img.fark.net

Watch out for heroine, it kills.
 
2017-03-17 09:25:12 PM  

weirdneighbour: [asknetworth.com image 366x650]
you naughty girl


I should not be getting a semi in a thread about Artie Lange.
 
2017-03-17 09:54:27 PM  

T.rex: I never knew the back story of why he was on the Stern show.  I remember the first time he appeared, i assumed he was a guy they literally pulled in off the street for the schtick of it.

But thats why it worked. Though, i never found him remotely witty or talented, he was just a real dude.  He never tried to make it about himself, whenever he spoke.  He served the show so i respected him being there.

Hope he gets cleaned up....


Artie is friends with Norm McDonald. The both are gamblers. He and Norm were in movies and TV shows together. Once, when Norm was plugging a show, Artie tagged along. Norm told Howard "Hey, I got a buddy who's got great drug stories"

One of Artie's great abilities is that he knows how to tell a funny story.  Howard fell in love with him almost instantly. When Jackie walked off the show, they had contest to see who would fill Jackies seat. Unlike anyone else, Artie had a natural ability to fit the show's flow and to be funny in a blue collar way; something that Stern was increasingly incapable of doing, dating supermodels and hanging out in the Hamptons.

What wasn't known at the time, Artie was a long time fan when he was a teen. He bonded with his father over Howard when they worked together in his Dad's roofing business. One day when Artie was goofing off instead of going to work, his Dad fell off a latter and became paralyzed from the neck down.  Artie always blamed himself. When the family needed money, they asked a lot of local celebrities for something they could auction. Howard Stern was the only one to respond, sending a jacket signed by the gang.  Of course Stern made jokes about how he thought that the listener would be healed by the power of his signature.  That made Artie and his father laughed. Artie was always greatful that the show made his father laugh. His father didn't live very long, and passed away.  So when Artie got the Stern Show, he was overjoyed.

For years Stern and Artie had a great bromance going. Unfortunately Artie kept doing his comedy on the weekends, earning great bank because of his exposure on the Stern Show. The work schedule, the flying and the show, lead him back to heavy drinking and drugs. Stern did everything he could do to help him, but eventually He couldn't take Artie's behavior.

Anytime he gets successful he starts dozing drugs because he can't handle the pressure. It's why he self destructed on Mad TV, it's why he self destructed on Stern show.. And now while his podcasting and new tv gigs are cropping up. It's why he's self destructing again.

If anything, he's punishing himself for not being at work the day his father fell off the ladder. He doesn't feel like he deserves the success.
 
2017-03-17 09:56:46 PM  
Does anyone else remember him from the first season(s?) of Mad TV? It was still good back then, but I was 12 so who really knows. I remember him announcing the cast in the first episode, doing himself last: "And me, the fat guy". I don't know if he quit or was fired, but his replacment (Will Sasso) wasn't as good. He went on to do Dirty Jobs though, two guys from competing Saturday night shows, both probably fired, made a good movie. He also had a shiatty sloshball movie after that, but I have an impression it was kinda funny even though I can't remember any details. Never knew him from Stern, but I hope he cleans it up. I know that's not going to happen...but hey Kieth Ritchards is alive so you never know.
 
2017-03-17 10:09:47 PM  
One day in 2008 or 9 I was coming into work late ,I took the Hoboken ferry to midtown.  On the NY side Artie was there waiting to take the ferry back to 'Boken.  I only knew it was Artie once I walked by him.  Pulling up to the dock I assumed it was an insane homeless guy who was going to ask the passengers for money.

/csb
 
2017-03-17 10:18:48 PM  
I liked him on Mad TV.

Except for that "Babe" sketch, that was disturbing.
 
2017-03-17 10:24:52 PM  

Darth_Lukecash: T.rex: I never knew the back story of why he was on the Stern show.  I remember the first time he appeared, i assumed he was a guy they literally pulled in off the street for the schtick of it.

But thats why it worked. Though, i never found him remotely witty or talented, he was just a real dude.  He never tried to make it about himself, whenever he spoke.  He served the show so i respected him being there.

Hope he gets cleaned up....

Artie is friends with Norm McDonald. The both are gamblers. He and Norm were in movies and TV shows together. Once, when Norm was plugging a show, Artie tagged along. Norm told Howard "Hey, I got a buddy who's got great drug stories"

One of Artie's great abilities is that he knows how to tell a funny story.  Howard fell in love with him almost instantly. When Jackie walked off the show, they had contest to see who would fill Jackies seat. Unlike anyone else, Artie had a natural ability to fit the show's flow and to be funny in a blue collar way; something that Stern was increasingly incapable of doing, dating supermodels and hanging out in the Hamptons.

What wasn't known at the time, Artie was a long time fan when he was a teen. He bonded with his father over Howard when they worked together in his Dad's roofing business. One day when Artie was goofing off instead of going to work, his Dad fell off a latter and became paralyzed from the neck down.  Artie always blamed himself. When the family needed money, they asked a lot of local celebrities for something they could auction. Howard Stern was the only one to respond, sending a jacket signed by the gang.  Of course Stern made jokes about how he thought that the listener would be healed by the power of his signature.  That made Artie and his father laughed. Artie was always greatful that the show made his father laugh. His father didn't live very long, and passed away.  So when Artie got the Stern Show, he was overjoyed.

For years Stern and Artie had a great bromance going. Unfort ...


Good read. I love Howard even now but the Artie years on Sirius are still my fave. Really would hate to see his light go out. But this behavior ain't new and he's been in bad shape for a long time.
 
2017-03-17 10:26:51 PM  

Darth_Lukecash: T.rex: I never knew the back story of why he was on the Stern show.  I remember the first time he appeared, i assumed he was a guy they literally pulled in off the street for the schtick of it.

But thats why it worked. Though, i never found him remotely witty or talented, he was just a real dude.  He never tried to make it about himself, whenever he spoke.  He served the show so i respected him being there.

Hope he gets cleaned up....

Artie is friends with Norm McDonald. The both are gamblers. He and Norm were in movies and TV shows together. Once, when Norm was plugging a show, Artie tagged along. Norm told Howard "Hey, I got a buddy who's got great drug stories"

One of Artie's great abilities is that he knows how to tell a funny story.  Howard fell in love with him almost instantly. When Jackie walked off the show, they had contest to see who would fill Jackies seat. Unlike anyone else, Artie had a natural ability to fit the show's flow and to be funny in a blue collar way; something that Stern was increasingly incapable of doing, dating supermodels and hanging out in the Hamptons.

What wasn't known at the time, Artie was a long time fan when he was a teen. He bonded with his father over Howard when they worked together in his Dad's roofing business. One day when Artie was goofing off instead of going to work, his Dad fell off a latter and became paralyzed from the neck down.  Artie always blamed himself. When the family needed money, they asked a lot of local celebrities for something they could auction. Howard Stern was the only one to respond, sending a jacket signed by the gang.  Of course Stern made jokes about how he thought that the listener would be healed by the power of his signature.  That made Artie and his father laughed. Artie was always greatful that the show made his father laugh. His father didn't live very long, and passed away.  So when Artie got the Stern Show, he was overjoyed.

For years Stern and Artie had a great bromance going. Unfortunately Artie kept doing his comedy on the weekends, earning great bank because of his exposure on the Stern Show. The work schedule, the flying and the show, lead him back to heavy drinking and drugs. Stern did everything he could do to help him, but eventually He couldn't take Artie's behavior.

Anytime he gets successful he starts dozing drugs because he can't handle the pressure. It's why he self destructed on Mad TV, it's why he self destructed on Stern show.. And now while his podcasting and new tv gigs are cropping up. It's why he's self destructing again.

If anything, he's punishing himself for not being at work the day his father fell off the ladder. He doesn't feel like he deserves the success.


Mostly true except for the part about Stern giving a shiat if Lange lived or died.  Just as with the wack pack or Kinison he went out of his way to enable his basest extincts and exploit him for the show.  Getting a cot in to mic him sleeping off a drug coma on the air, encouraging drunken rages against staff and employees, playing BS sick calls for laughs, and abetting and glorifying the worst offenses.  It worked well and was sometimes entertaining but it showed no friendship or care.

/not my bro
 
2017-03-17 10:36:44 PM  

Spaceballer: I liked him on Mad TV.{That's my white momma}

I forgot all about that even existing.  In retrospect it was pretty good.
 
2017-03-17 11:11:50 PM  
What happened to his nose?
 
2017-03-18 12:00:48 AM  
I used to listen to Stern a lot before he left terrestrial radio.  My favorite story of his was when he was talking about needing to leave the set of MadTV because he really needed some coke.  The problem was he had a prosthetic pig nose on, that apparently took a long time to put on.  The nose didn't have any holes so he somehow drilled a hole on one side.  Then he was in his car stopped at a red light and decided to do a key bump.  In the middle of doing a bump, a soccer mom pulled up beside him and had the most horrified look on her face that he had ever seen.

/He told the story better.
 
2017-03-18 12:13:01 AM  
like other's said, i thought he was already dead.

Personally, I didn't like him on Stern.  He seemed to interrupt Howard or Robin, with some worthless comment, that threw the dialog off.  On bits, he was good, but in the general conversation I wish they muted his mic.
 
2017-03-18 12:26:04 AM  

Mister Buttons: I used to listen to Stern a lot before he left terrestrial radio.  My favorite story of his was when he was talking about needing to leave the set of MadTV because he really needed some coke.  The problem was he had a prosthetic pig nose on, that apparently took a long time to put on.  The nose didn't have any holes so he somehow drilled a hole on one side.  Then he was in his car stopped at a red light and decided to do a key bump.  In the middle of doing a bump, a soccer mom pulled up beside him and had the most horrified look on her face that he had ever seen.

/He told the story better.


Whenever I think of him that story jumps to mind.
 
2017-03-18 12:38:33 AM  

W.C.fields forever: Mister Buttons: I used to listen to Stern a lot before he left terrestrial radio.  My favorite story of his was when he was talking about needing to leave the set of MadTV because he really needed some coke.  The problem was he had a prosthetic pig nose on, that apparently took a long time to put on.  The nose didn't have any holes so he somehow drilled a hole on one side.  Then he was in his car stopped at a red light and decided to do a key bump.  In the middle of doing a bump, a soccer mom pulled up beside him and had the most horrified look on her face that he had ever seen.

/He told the story better.

Whenever I think of him that story jumps to mind.


I'm overexposed to that story, just like the Carol Burnett Went With the Wind drapes skit.  It's long since lost any humor to me.

He desperately needs new material and unfortunately his favorite way to get it is near death experiences.
 
2017-03-18 12:43:46 AM  
Artie's stand up was just awful, but he was so good on the radio. But for the longest time, he was always a yes man to Stern. That is why I always loved Jackie. He kept everyone wound up on a show that was at its peak when everyone was kibitzing with each other.
 
2017-03-18 01:14:47 AM  
Artie was REALLY good in the 1st couple of episode of Crashing.
 
2017-03-18 02:02:41 AM  
Was never a big Artie fan, but enjoyed him on his recent appearance on Pete Holmes' podcast with Judd Apatow.
 
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