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(US News)   Prosecutor defends man's 22-year sentence for stealing TV remote: After refusing a defense attorney, defendant told judge '[fark] you, go suck my d--- and go [fark] yourself'   ( usnews.com) divider line
    More: Followup, Stealing TV Remote, Steven Nelson, Share link  
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7493 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jan 2017 at 12:20 PM (36 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



112 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2017-01-10 12:15:42 PM  
You probably shouldn't insult a judge in his own courtroom.

/ just sayin'
 
2017-01-10 12:21:47 PM  
Okay,  he's a fick. But 22 years?
 
2017-01-10 12:22:12 PM  

4seasons85!: Okay,  he's a fick. But 22 years?


I meant dick, but whatever.
 
2017-01-10 12:22:32 PM  
Did he call him a "f*ckman-ass cracker"?
 
2017-01-10 12:22:36 PM  
 
2017-01-10 12:23:42 PM  
... so ... Rick?  From Rick and Morty?  When they did that reenactment from State of Georgia vs. Allen?

 
2017-01-10 12:23:44 PM  
Neck tats, shaved head, little scraggly chin beard.

He's just misses his friends in the Brotherhood and wanted to join them for a while.
 
2017-01-10 12:23:59 PM  
And a judge prolly shouldnt be doling out 22 year long sentences cause someone was resentful of being taken to court over a TV remote.

Whats the math on this? Court expenses + cop/ Jailing expenses + 22 years in jail on the taxpayer money dime = 1 judges pride. OH and 1 tv remote.
 
2017-01-10 12:24:10 PM  

hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.


Damn!  You beat me to it by a matter of seconds!
 
2017-01-10 12:24:27 PM  
He ain't Dale Carnegie.
 
2017-01-10 12:24:27 PM  
Hardcore repeat felon. Basically no mitigating factors. Obvious sociopath. Long sentence. Nothing to see here. Move on.
 
2017-01-10 12:24:28 PM  
Didn't we just have a thread that talked about that people who swear a lot are more honest?...

/ no, I don't believe that
 
2017-01-10 12:25:09 PM  

nanim: Didn't we just have a thread that talked about that people who swear a lot are more honest?...

/ no, I don't believe that


Why the fark not?
 
2017-01-10 12:25:12 PM  

hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.


Kegluneq: ... so ... Rick?  From Rick and Morty?  When they did that reenactment from State of Georgia vs. Allen?

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/7vN_PEmeKb0 - 480x270]


Came here to post this. Thanks for doing my light work.

IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS , *PLEASE*, it's WELL worth the watch.
 
2017-01-10 12:25:13 PM  
Wacky, getting access denied.
 
2017-01-10 12:25:29 PM  

Kegluneq: ... so ... Rick?  From Rick and Morty?  When they did that reenactment from State of Georgia vs. Allen?

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/7vN_PEmeKb0 - 480x270]


Came for this, leaving satisfied.
 
2017-01-10 12:25:39 PM  

trickymoo: And a judge prolly shouldnt be doling out 22 year long sentences cause someone was resentful of being taken to court over a TV remote.

Whats the math on this? Court expenses + cop/ Jailing expenses + 22 years in jail on the taxpayer money dime = 1 judges pride. OH and 1 tv remote.


And the little matter of the 60 other break ins he admitted to.
 
2017-01-10 12:26:15 PM  
Bramwell told the judge, "F--k you, go suck my d--k and go f--k yourself,"

His pick-up lines need a little work.
 
2017-01-10 12:26:36 PM  
He's white.  Meh.
 
2017-01-10 12:26:38 PM  
Sounds like a personal problem, dude.

Enjoy your 22-year vacation.
 
2017-01-10 12:27:44 PM  
Immediately made me think of this:


http://abovethelaw.com/2016/07/greatest-transcript-ever-turned-into-g​r​eatest-cartoon-ever/?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=website&utm_content=li​nk


Real court transcript that was turned into a Rick and Morty cartoon, its 100% real and 100% NOT SAFE FOR WORK.

Worth it
 
2017-01-10 12:27:59 PM  
Still nobody has explained how DNA evidence was used, for theft under $25.
I mean I'm sorry but I still don't get it, I thought it was for higher priority cases like murder, rape, etc.
 
2017-01-10 12:28:04 PM  

trickymoo: And a judge prolly shouldnt be doling out 22 year long sentences cause someone was resentful of being taken to court over a TV remote.

Whats the math on this? Court expenses + cop/ Jailing expenses + 22 years in jail on the taxpayer money dime = 1 judges pride. OH and 1 tv remote.


No, he didn't get 22 years for simply stealing a TV remote. It might be for the other 59 burglaries he committed. Also, the whole "career criminal" thing.
 
2017-01-10 12:28:53 PM  
Did he stick it up his butt?
Because I saw a guy do that once.
Stick a Remote up his butt.
 
2017-01-10 12:29:03 PM  

hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.


Damn all of you for beating me to it.
 
2017-01-10 12:30:53 PM  
This wouldn't happen if people were sentenced to hard labor, IMHO.
 
2017-01-10 12:31:42 PM  
Gotta love the bleeding hearts on this one.  The man is a serial burglar and a parasite.  He was officially charged with theft of the remote only because he left DNA in a glove tied to the theft, the prosecutors decided to just pursue that charge since there was DNA, rather than burglary.  He confessed to over 60 area burglariesand still received eight years less than the maximum allowed under law.  He will be eligible for release in 11 years.

If anything he got off light.
 
2017-01-10 12:31:48 PM  

Kegluneq: ... so ... Rick?  From Rick and Morty?  When they did that reenactment from State of Georgia vs. Allen?

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/7vN_PEmeKb0 - 480x270]


IN. FULL. COLOR!!!

 
2017-01-10 12:31:49 PM  
Excessive sentence much?
 
2017-01-10 12:33:20 PM  

Fark It: Gotta love the bleeding hearts on this one.  The man is a serial burglar and a parasite.  He was officially charged with theft of the remote only because he left DNA in a glove tied to the theft, the prosecutors decided to just pursue that charge since there was DNA, rather than burglary.  He confessed to over 60 area burglariesand still received eight years less than the maximum allowed under law.  He will be eligible for release in 11 years.

If anything he got off light.


That's the thing about the law.  You can only be sentenced according to what you are actually charged with, not what the judge THINKS what else you might have done.
 
2017-01-10 12:33:27 PM  

Another Government Employee: .

MelGoesOnTour: .

Farking Rule #4: NEVAR read the article when the headline is trollin

/This. Is. Fark.
 
2017-01-10 12:33:58 PM  

trickymoo: And a judge prolly shouldnt be doling out 22 year long sentences cause someone was resentful of being taken to court over a TV remote.

Whats the math on this? Court expenses + cop/ Jailing expenses + 22 years in jail on the taxpayer money dime = 1 judges pride. OH and 1 tv remote.


What should happen to a chronic recidivist?  He's clearly not going to stop being a kleptomaniac without some sort of treatment, and our system isn't set up to provide tailored psychological help for the incarcerated.  He said he has burgled 60 or so homes in the area, so he's clearly a nuisance.  Given the circumstances, and the lack of likely behavioral change, it seems the best option is to keep him locked up.  Unfortunately, treatment would be best but that's not going to happen without significant reform to our justice system... and that's never going to happen.

#Pessimism
 
2017-01-10 12:34:08 PM  

4seasons85!: 4seasons85!: Okay,  he's a fick. But 22 years?

I meant dick, but whatever.


The article also mentions that he is a career criminal with a huge rap sheet, and confessed to a string of about 60 thefts in recent months.
 
2017-01-10 12:35:29 PM  

hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.


This would also work for a hearing with Goodell or for a Senate confirmation hearing on a Cabinet appointee.
 
2017-01-10 12:36:30 PM  

byteme4321: Still nobody has explained how DNA evidence was used, for theft under $25.
I mean I'm sorry but I still don't get it, I thought it was for higher priority cases like murder, rape, etc.


I'm betting the responding cop didn't like him.  Piss a cop or a prosecutor off and all of a sudden the full resources of the state come crashing down on you.
 
2017-01-10 12:36:39 PM  

hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.


that was...horrible.  I tried to watch it, even gave it well over a minute.  If a mixture of bad comedic timing, sluggishness, and awkwardness is your thing then...I guess?  Seemed like it was made by a preteen with severe acne and no friends.
 
2017-01-10 12:37:38 PM  

The more you eat the more you fart: You can only be sentenced according to what you are actually charged with, not what the judge THINKS what else you might have done.


WRONG.  This was not a case of the judge sentencing someone based on what he/she "THINKS" a criminal did, this was a case of a judge sentencing someone based on what a criminal admitted to.

Remember, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
 
2017-01-10 12:37:48 PM  

Loreweaver: 4seasons85!: 4seasons85!: Okay,  he's a fick. But 22 years?

I meant dick, but whatever.

The article also mentions that he is a career criminal with a huge rap sheet, and confessed to a string of about 60 thefts in recent months.


Yeah read that later. So 22 years seems justified.
 
2017-01-10 12:38:20 PM  

IamAwake: hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.

that was...horrible.  I tried to watch it, even gave it well over a minute.  If a mixture of bad comedic timing, sluggishness, and awkwardness is your thing then...I guess?  Seemed like it was made by a preteen with severe acne and no friends.


It's an actual court transcript.
 
2017-01-10 12:38:31 PM  

Loreweaver: 4seasons85!: 4seasons85!: Okay,  he's a fick. But 22 years?

I meant dick, but whatever.

The article also mentions that he is a career criminal with a huge rap sheet, and confessed to a string of about 60 thefts in recent months.


Yeah, the first 60 thefts is ok in Illinois. It's 61 that gets you 22 years.
 
2017-01-10 12:38:37 PM  

byteme4321: Still nobody has explained how DNA evidence was used, for theft under $25.
I mean I'm sorry but I still don't get it, I thought it was for higher priority cases like murder, rape, etc.


Maybe DNA testing has gotten so cheap and easy it can be used for this?  It's being used to identify whose dog's been pooping on the lawn.
 
2017-01-10 12:39:32 PM  
This is exactly the kind of person who should be locked up for a long time to protect the rest of society. This is why we have prisons.

Protecting us from weed smokers? Waste of money. Holding one-time teenage offenders for 5 years with a bunch of gangsters to "rehabilitate" them? Counter-productive. Holding this guy forever? Fine with me.
 
2017-01-10 12:39:46 PM  

iheartscotch: You probably shouldn't insult a judge in his own courtroom.

/ just sayin'


Probably, but then again, freedom of speech doesn't end at the courtroom doors.

22 years is above and beyond "cruel and unusual punishment" for the crime of being a dick.
 
2017-01-10 12:40:15 PM  

Snarfangel: Bramwell told the judge, "F--k you, go suck my d--k and go f--k yourself,"

His pick-up lines need a little work.


Where he's going those lines might just do the trick.
 
2017-01-10 12:40:55 PM  

trickymoo: And a judge prolly shouldnt be doling out 22 year long sentences cause someone was resentful of being taken to court over a TV remote.

Whats the math on this? Court expenses + cop/ Jailing expenses + 22 years in jail on the taxpayer money dime = 1 judges pride. OH and 1 tv remote.


Regarding the cost, 60 burglaries is not cheap.  In terms of state resources, monetary and time loss for home owners, that's a lot of money.  And then there's the risk.  Sooner or later (and I'm surprised it hasn't been sooner) this guy would have encountered a homeowner or a dog and somebody could have gotten seriously hurt or killed.  So sending this guy away for a (somewhat) long time was more than reasonable.
 
2017-01-10 12:42:07 PM  

drewsfarkthrowaway: iheartscotch: You probably shouldn't insult a judge in his own courtroom.

/ just sayin'

Probably, but then again, freedom of speech doesn't end at the courtroom doors.

22 years is above and beyond "cruel and unusual punishment" for the crime of being a dick.


It's pretty light for a career criminal and serial burglar who admitted to 60 burglaries.
 
2017-01-10 12:43:30 PM  

The Goddamn Batman: IamAwake: hardinparamedic: I thought things like this only happened in Georgia.

In an encounter so hilarious and awe inspiring that the Rick and Morty animators actually animated the entire ordeal.

that was...horrible.  I tried to watch it, even gave it well over a minute.  If a mixture of bad comedic timing, sluggishness, and awkwardness is your thing then...I guess?  Seemed like it was made by a preteen with severe acne and no friends.

It's an actual court transcript.


the transcript http://imgur.com/a/skffp
 
2017-01-10 12:43:38 PM  

dj_bigbird: Wacky, getting access denied.


Kept wanting me to become a twit. Or tweeter. Or some crap.
 
2017-01-10 12:43:54 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-01-10 12:44:12 PM  

4seasons85!: Okay,  he's a fick. But 22 years?


www.chattanoogan.com
 
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