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(Aint-It-Cool-News)   AICN gets review of "stinking festering pile of worthlessness" known as "The Scorpion King."   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
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2873 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Jan 2002 at 8:46 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

16 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-01-07 09:01:03 AM  
You sir, are a crappy writer.
2002-01-07 09:20:46 AM  
I hate to criticize, for as Godard said, "Those who are afraid to step into the abyss should not criticize those who aren't afraid" (I'm paraphrasing) But since I too am a filmmaker in training...

Take it from me a wanna be douche bag film maker... Christ isn't everyone an 'armchair quarterback' these days?
2002-01-07 09:26:03 AM  
You were expecting great art?
2002-01-07 09:52:11 AM  
Godard also said: "All you need to make a movie is a girl and a gun." Hollywoods seems to take this seriously
2002-01-07 09:58:14 AM  
Saw the trailer when I finally got to see LOTR last night with my wife. Can we talk about that instead?

I have to say it: I was so afraid LOTR wouldn't live up to the hype, which I tried to shield myself from, but could not. The movie was far better than I had expected or even could have hoped for. Thank god.

Three comments in particular I'd like to make:

1. Peter Jackson: Best Director. End of story.

2. Great casting. Hugo Weaving is a kickass motherfarker. Ethan Hawke good. Liv Tyler good (hope we see more of her, tho I suspect we won't). Vyggo whatsisface was excellent. Ian MacKellan, great. John Rhys-Davies was buried under a mountain of makeup, and was digitally shortened about a foot, but managed to get some good exposure. Ian Holm as Bilbo: great choice. Don't know who all the individuals were cast as the other three Hobbits (Sam,Merry,Pippin) but they seemed familiar, and did a good job of playing up the carefree nature of the Hobbits torn by circumstance and rising to the challenge, without going over the top with cuteness (a la Ewoks)

3. Great Setting Choosing NZ as the location was a great idea.
2002-01-07 09:59:31 AM  
2002-01-07 10:17:03 AM  
...steaming, festering pile of worthlesness...

Are we sure this guy's not reviewing Harry?
2002-01-07 10:17:55 AM  
I'm not usually one to nit-pit, but shouldn't this headline really read:

AICN gets review BY "stinking festering pile of worthlessness" known as "The Harry Knowles."
2002-01-07 12:04:03 PM  
I bet the people who did Scorpion King didn't invite him on the set. He only gives good reviews if the movie-makers invite him on the set and wine and dine him.

Harry Knowles is a star-struck tool. He would have sucked John Travolta's wang if they had invited him onto the set of Battlefield: Earth.
2002-01-07 12:30:47 PM  
Shemp; Don't you mean nit - PICK?
2002-01-07 01:17:07 PM  
Define Irony- being nit-picky about someone misspelling nit-pick

No, I'm not sure it's irony and I don't give a damn
2002-01-07 01:37:12 PM  
No way man. This film will make everyone forget about
LOTR, right about the point where The Rock says "I've
come for the girl...and your HEAD!"
2002-01-07 02:37:21 PM  
Do you smell what my ass is cookin'?
2002-01-07 02:38:14 PM  
Dllsgrlz, you are absolutely correct - that's what I get for farking before noon.

Regardless, I still can't stand Harry's reviews - he's such a whore. There's nothing necessarily wrong with being a whore, but he so vehemently denies being a whore, and that makes it sad and pathetic.
2002-01-07 02:39:51 PM  
Wait, I actually read the 1st paragraph of this "story."

This guy actually wants another Conan movie made. Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha​hahahahh ahahahaha!
2002-01-07 02:59:37 PM  
i bet henry smells really bad. he looks like he would. most fat loads never bother with hygiene. i think once you get that disgustingly fat, you figure, "why bother?" or maybe the soap can't keep up with river of sweat and crumbs
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