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(Gamespy) Boobies The physics of videogame boobie-jiggle (safe for work)   (gamespy.com) divider line 70
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22906 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jan 2002 at 10:51 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2002-01-04 10:53:21 AM
I definately need to change professions. Either this or start a *boobies* site.
 
2002-01-04 10:54:45 AM
I'm in physics, but oddly enough my work involves boobie-jiggle not in the least. I feel really ripped off right now.
 
2002-01-04 10:58:27 AM
I wish they taught that in physics class. Then maybe I would stay awake in class.
 
2002-01-04 10:58:29 AM
......mmmmmmmmmmmmm boobies.
 
2002-01-04 10:58:50 AM
Gamespy? More like suckspy!
 
2002-01-04 10:58:55 AM
" Now, as she bends down to make her move, you can see several forces being applied to her plump, firm, ripened melons."

Gawd, I love it when they get all technical and stuff!
 
2002-01-04 10:59:05 AM
Cool! Now how about a Photoshop?
 
2002-01-04 10:59:28 AM
New from mircosoft:

Boobie Sumilator!!!!!!!!!!
 
2002-01-04 11:01:13 AM
I think they already did that, Jimmycurn...

 
2002-01-04 11:04:14 AM
That was really damn funny
 
2002-01-04 11:04:51 AM
Breasts are only a mimic of the primate buttock display, anyway.
 
2002-01-04 11:06:36 AM
Ooh-ah ooh-ah!

//scratches self
 
2002-01-04 11:10:15 AM
The guy's from T&A Imagaing...

Hehehehehehehehehehehe
 
2002-01-04 11:10:45 AM
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm primate buttocks.......
 
2002-01-04 11:12:31 AM
damn skippy....it's the only reason i'd buy the game.
 
2002-01-04 11:13:07 AM
The last question is the best:

Fargo: Have you ever touched a girl?

Moore: ...no.
 
2002-01-04 11:15:31 AM
Wow... that was just... mind-bogglingly stupid.
 
2002-01-04 11:16:07 AM
Ha! T & A inc!
 
2002-01-04 11:16:42 AM
I'm a physics major but we don't do any of that. Maybe I should do a research project?
 
2002-01-04 11:18:37 AM
Okay, I'm a dumass. I htought it was a real article at first. I don't think I figured it out until the third question.
 
2002-01-04 11:19:16 AM
FINALLY!!!!!! Something I can relate to.
 
2002-01-04 11:21:07 AM
reminds me of the "Physics of the Underwire Bra" essay.
 
daz
2002-01-04 11:24:42 AM
...like a Zip-loc bag full of delicious chocolate pudding

Mmmm... chocolate pudding.
 
2002-01-04 11:48:55 AM
I like pudding.
 
2002-01-04 11:51:47 AM
A "thought" just occurred to me. How would plastic surgery affect these computations. What are the physics of fake boobies?
 
2002-01-04 11:54:37 AM
2nd order differential equations seem like over kill in this instance.

You'd think they'd also need some kind of coefs. of viscosity and density to acct. for real v. Si.

Why not treat this as the 5th state of matter ...gel?

/cluelessgeek

Does motivate one to reconsider fluid dynamics as an interest.
 
2002-01-04 11:59:41 AM
The first picture in that article where the scientists are examing "the pose" just screams "PHOTOSHOP"!
 
2002-01-04 12:14:38 PM
I didn't realize the nipple was the center of gravity.
 
2002-01-04 12:18:22 PM
We need some webcam farkettes to demonstrate, methinks.
 
2002-01-04 12:27:27 PM
Simple Harmonic Oscillator, E_nazgul. I think they know what they're doing. And Uncle Creamy, the nipple is the center of everything.
 
2002-01-04 12:28:14 PM
Finally, an article that is both nerdy and has boobies! Even if it is a parody, someone has got to actually code some of the "bounce" we see in games. I'd be willing to be he (or she) does "research" to find the best jiggle. Unreal Tournament had excellent Boobie (and ass for that matter) jiggle.
 
2002-01-04 12:28:18 PM
Look carefully Wflu... It already IS a photoshop!
 
2002-01-04 12:39:39 PM
I'm not getting enough boobie-jiggle in my life.
 
2002-01-04 12:40:58 PM
You gotta love their dedication to realism.
Zeus bless them all.
 
2002-01-04 12:46:05 PM
Reminds me of the Crackwhore player model in Quake II. She had a mighty nice jiggle...
 
2002-01-04 12:46:56 PM
Cripes...I played DOA3 last weekend, fun game but difficult to play with those distracting boobies all over the place, CG or not, those fighting girlies are something else!

[kick, kick, punch...pants getting tight...wtf?]
 
2002-01-04 12:47:06 PM
St.Alfonzo
yeah the SHO works for the pendulous breast effect (getting the swing on), but what about the deformation?
But I guess that no one wants to see the "tennisball in the sock" type breasts in a video game. ;-0

Yes, I agree that they know what they're doing, I just don't think it's that simple (neither are we apparently).

Anyway, I'm goofin' except for when I say "I hated DE second only to group theory (Galois blows)."
/overanalysis
 
2002-01-04 12:50:56 PM
bah, there wasn't nearly enough real math in the article.

2nd order DE ARE nifty (even though I can't remember how to work with them for the life of me) but it would have been funnier if they'd actually given us some more specifics for the modelling.

still, any combination of higher maths + b00bies == guaranteed to please this farker.
 
2002-01-04 12:53:01 PM
Jimmycurn wanted a photoshop. Here's a photoshop.



I like bear suns.
 
2002-01-04 12:55:51 PM
OKay... Or it didn't show up at all. Grr. Maybe a second try..
 
2002-01-04 12:56:11 PM
FYI, the piece is a nice take off of the infamous Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Gown (the diagrams are similar). A text version is here.
 
2002-01-04 12:57:33 PM
I think Howard Hughes was the pioneer with this material when he designed a bra for Jane Russell.
 
2002-01-04 01:37:27 PM
That's one of the best articles I've read on here in some time!

but there's no simple way to capture the jauncy bounces of succulent fleshy bits, so ripe and firm you just want to take them in your mouth and suckle 'em like a creamy choc-o-pop.

mmmmmmmmm . . . sounds good!!!!
 
2002-01-04 01:40:58 PM
I wonder if they need any field researchers...
 
2002-01-04 01:42:02 PM
That was a hella funny article!
 
lbo
2002-01-04 02:22:49 PM
Hella!
 
lbo
2002-01-04 02:22:49 PM
Hella!
 
lbo
2002-01-04 02:23:24 PM
Whoa, I didn't mean to submit twice....
 
2002-01-04 02:27:33 PM
doa3: the best reason to buy an xbox
 
2002-01-04 03:21:46 PM
DOA3 is the only game out currently that I would want to play on the xbox. Right now all they have are games I don't care for and a whole bunch of update games like souped up versions of Silent Hill 2 and Onimusha among others. When they get some original games, I might buy. I'm willing to sell my soul to Microsoft if they can make something decent besides DOA3.

Anyway, I'm assuming DOA3 is pretty similar to DOA2, in which the jiggle is not so noticeable. Well at least compared to the original DOA. Has anyone played that game? It has some unrealistic jiggle. Like if you get punched, the boobs will like bounce up to Lei-Fang's face and then all the way down to her waist and back. It was still a pretty good fighting game nonetheless.
 
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