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(The Sun)   Jamie Oliver cooks pot roast for wife in the nude, ends up roasting his weenie. The Sun is there   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 186
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31141 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Apr 2004 at 2:43 PM (10 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2004-04-06 11:17:26 AM  
Who ordered the well done tube steak?
 
2004-04-06 12:34:44 PM  
Well, I hope that he gave it even, diamond-shaped grill marks. He is a professional chef, after all. I'm sure Jools expects nothing less.

Jamie, whose catchphrase is 'pukka', recently revealed he is packing up his kitchen gear to move to America.

Nooo! Stay the fark away, you hyperactive mushmouth.
 
2004-04-06 01:05:11 PM  
Dear England,

We do not accept Jamie Oliver unless you take Emeril Lagasse. Additionally, we would like to negotiate for Keira Knightley. We are willing to trade Winona Ryder plus a second-round draft pick.

America
 
2004-04-06 01:06:54 PM  
This can't be the first time this has happened to the "Naked Chef".
 
2004-04-06 01:11:52 PM  
I think you'd probably rather trade Emeril for Nigella Lawson, Unfreakable.
 
2004-04-06 01:21:36 PM  
I would happily eat anything Nigella prepares for me, if you know what I mean, wink wink, nudge nudge.
 
2004-04-06 02:16:13 PM  
England isn't that stupid, Smokahontas. There's no way they'll take that deal unless we include cash to help their salary cap.
 
2004-04-06 02:46:45 PM  
Agree that Nigella is teh hot. As far as Jamie's sausage:

 
2004-04-06 02:46:46 PM  
Screw the cash, let's just give them Hugh Grant and Rod Stewart back.

Chances are better they'd take the cash, though.
 
2004-04-06 02:46:48 PM  
Do not cook in the nude; is that is tip for the day, or did he lose his tip in the accident ?
 
2004-04-06 02:47:34 PM  
Is anyone else sick of these "The ____ is there" headlines?
 
2004-04-06 02:47:51 PM  
is it just me? or does that guy's tongue seem to be to big for his mouth?
 
2004-04-06 02:48:11 PM  
* gets popcorn, awaits horde of Oliver haters that are bound to appear *

Say what you want about Jamie, he is rather odd, but his recipes work.
 
2004-04-06 02:48:51 PM  
He wants to relocate while his daughters Poppy Honey, two, and 11-month-old Daisy Boo, are young.

He named his children that on purposeAND he burns his penis while cooking in the nude? I think he needs to save the money he spends on his maid and invest it for his children's upcoming mental health bills.
 
2004-04-06 02:49:00 PM  
Can't we just stick him on a rowboat with no oars and tow him to International waters?
 
2004-04-06 02:49:01 PM  
Can i get one Weenie with krout, mustard, and onions?

and give me a diet Coke.
 
2004-04-06 02:49:41 PM  
He wants to relocate while his daughters Poppy Honey, two, and 11-month-old Daisy Boo, are young.


No thanks, we have enough idiots naming their kids dumb names here stateside.

Thank you,
Timberland Mercedes Nike, III
 
2004-04-06 02:51:08 PM  
"...singed his prime cut"
Great. Now I know he's circumsized.

Notes to Jamie:
Ovens are hot.
You shared this information...why?
 
2004-04-06 02:51:17 PM  
Combustable...it's not just you, it's me too.
 
2004-04-06 02:51:46 PM  
He said: "Jools is obsessed with cleaning but I'm very bad at it. As soon as we could afford it, we hired a maid. It's our only luxury and I love it.

"I even leave the towels on the floor when Ive been in the bathroom."


What a farking ass.
 
2004-04-06 02:52:45 PM  
guess he never got around to making the Hot Cross Buns.

-try the veal, or shoot me, whichever...
 
2004-04-06 02:53:09 PM  
Serves him right for cooking in the nude.

can't get most mother f**ker's to wash their hands after using the bathroom, the last thing I'd want to see is some twit cooking in the nude.

I can't think of any person who'd find that sexy...
 
2004-04-06 02:53:22 PM  
I think he would be of great use cooking food in Iraq.

/mmmmm.Nigella
 
2004-04-06 02:53:40 PM  
yeah, the phrase "bulldog chewing a wasp" springs to mind, Banjoman
 
2004-04-06 02:53:50 PM  
The show is unwatchable and he is practically unintelligible.
 
2004-04-06 02:54:38 PM  
Jamie, whose catchphrase is 'pukka', recently revealed he is packing up his kitchen gear to move to America.

What the hell is a pukka and why would anyone want it as a catch phrase. Motherpukka might be a better one.
 
2004-04-06 02:55:04 PM  
OMGOMGOMG!!! He was cooking in the NUDE!?!!11!!eleven!?!

Also, I demand atleast one penis-scorching article a day, and two on Sundays. These are my demands, and I think you will see they are reasonable.
 
2004-04-06 02:57:25 PM  
ALTON BROWN RULES, LONG LIVE GOOD EATS

A pox on:
-Jamie
-Emril
-Those two asshats on "Best of"

I toss one in Rachel Ray, but I'd have to tape her mouth shut (or somehow keep it stuffed).
 
2004-04-06 02:57:43 PM  
This reminds me of the end of The Cook, the Thief, his Wife, and her Lover...
 
2004-04-06 02:57:46 PM  
He named a CHILD "Daisy Boo"?? Why couldn't he burn the dang thing off so he won't have any more kids to visit such torture on?
 
2004-04-06 02:58:43 PM  
"Jools is obsessed with cleaning but I'm very bad at it. ...

"I even leave the towels on the floor when I've been in the bathroom."


It's one thing to be bad at cleaning, but he just sounds like a lazy slob. Bet he doesn't bother flushing either.
 
2004-04-06 02:59:31 PM  
He wants to relocate while his daughters Poppy Honey, two, and 11-month-old Daisy Boo, are young.

Personally, he should be hung (no pun intended) for doing that to his children. I see drugs in their future.
 
2004-04-06 02:59:32 PM  
burnt sausage

 
2004-04-06 02:59:49 PM  
I would cook a meal for Rachael Ray... In the nude....

/Perky..
 
2004-04-06 03:02:33 PM  
72Booger:

I freaking love Rachael Ray. I likes my women with a bit of junk in the trunk.

I bet shes a squealer too.
 
2004-04-06 03:04:26 PM  
Jebus. He might as well named his child Jermajesty.
 
2004-04-06 03:04:29 PM  
Java_Drinker

Yay! I love Good Eats. Now I can feel like less of a loser when I enjoy watching it. Maybe. Ok, not really.
 
2004-04-06 03:04:57 PM  
His kid's names are Dingle Poop and Cockle Skunk????
 
2004-04-06 03:05:07 PM  
I'm still hung up on Martha Stewart, I likes me women with a dark side.....
 
2004-04-06 03:05:29 PM  
2004-04-06 02:59:49 PM 72Booger


I would cook a meal for Rachael Ray... In the nude....

/Perky..


It would have to be pasta, since that seems to be all she ever farking cooks.

She is cute, though, and okay to watch.

Emeril, on the other hand, is a neanderthal who can't cook for shiat. And Doc Gibb is the worst bandleader in the history of television.
 
2004-04-06 03:07:14 PM  
Caulk,

I have a weird Martha fetish too. Then again I have a think for sexy pre WWII germanic libarians with big spanking paddles.
 
2004-04-06 03:09:03 PM  
Yep..
I also like that other chick on Food TV.. I'm not sure her name, but the show is called something like "Simple Italian" I think..
Oh Yeah..
That would be a good day..
 
2004-04-06 03:09:36 PM  
This goon would spit and lisp all over your food as he made it....also, I don't believe he has a "wife". I hate this guy so bad! He made "spotted dick" for his "mates" on one show....
 
2004-04-06 03:12:50 PM  
Hey Brits: 2 Things:

1) Get outta Ireland

and

2) Get a farking life
 
2004-04-06 03:13:00 PM  
Big-tongued freak.
 
2004-04-06 03:13:03 PM  
And what's everyone got against Emeril anyway?
 
2004-04-06 03:13:14 PM  
I am sure that spit on English food is more common that one might think. I think be considered a flavor enhncer.

For teh record, he's a wanker. He should stay in England.
 
2004-04-06 03:14:48 PM  
Somebody_Someone


This goon would spit and lisp all over your food as he made it....also, I don't believe he has a "wife". I hate this guy so bad! He made "spotted dick" for his "mates" on one show....


At least he doesn't put his face two inches above the food like Emeril does.
 
2004-04-06 03:15:10 PM  
For some reason, y'all are giving me the giggles
 
2004-04-06 03:15:28 PM  
Jamie hot? Nah, I'll pass. I'd have to say that old southern guy who pretty much drank the whole bottle of wine before the meal was halfway done...you know who I'm refering to? I think his suspenders were attached to his body...can't remember his name. He was yummy.
 
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