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(ICNetwork)   Naked women, invisible trees and rogue roundabouts have all been cited as the cause of car accidents   ( divider line 62
    More: Obvious  
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8402 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Apr 2004 at 3:22 PM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

62 Comments   (+0 »)

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2004-04-05 10:12:42 AM  
Longtime readers of Fark can think of better examples, such as the kid who swallowed a bee while singing along with uh ... one of the Backstreet kids' songs
2004-04-05 10:50:22 AM  
Notice how nobody wanted to take responsibility for their lousy driving.

"The car in front had better brakes so I was unable to compete with the stopping distance and ended up hitting it."

It's called tailgating, idiot. Don't drive so close.
2004-04-05 11:39:17 AM  
I have a friend who swears to this day that one of his car accidents was caused by a bat in his shoe. I'm still not sure how the bat got there in the first place.
2004-04-05 11:46:08 AM  

Your employer probably doesn't want to hear the one about you, a naked woman, a dead goat, and a chainsaw
2004-04-05 12:39:49 PM  
"Officer, it was his fault, he stopped his car in the middle of the road."

"Yes maam, he is supposed to do that at a red light, and there were cars in front of him that had stopped."

"But he was too close in front of me."

"No maam, you were too close behind him."

"Same thing, he stopped in the middle of the road."

"You should have stopped behind him."

"But, I did."

"Yes maam, after you hit him."

"But if he hadn't been there, I wouldn't have hit him."

"Yes maam, but he was there, and you rear ended him, and my report is going to reflect that you are responsible for the accident."

"But it is his fault. He stopped his car in front of me."

This went for at least 20 minutes. Dumb woman yapping on her cell phone rear-ended a friend of mine, and we had to listen to this drivel long after it stopped being hysterically funny. She honestly had completely discounted the possibility that she was at fault. The cop, who was right next to us when she hit us, was professional, polite, and calm, but you could see him starting to entertain the notion of whacking her with his baton.
2004-04-05 01:41:35 PM  
I'll confess. I once nearly ramped it off of an overpass doing 75 mph because I was fiddling with the radio. My last words would have been (to my friend in the passenger seat) "Judas Priest - Cool, let's crank it up!"

2004-04-05 03:25:10 PM  
But apparently, not dead whales ...
2004-04-05 03:25:42 PM  
it wasn't my fault the street shouldn't have turned that direction.....
2004-04-05 03:25:58 PM  
Do I get to be the first to say repeat?
2004-04-05 03:26:28 PM many things are going to be duplicated today?
2004-04-05 03:26:47 PM  
Welcome to Repeat Day here at Fark.
Welcome to Repeat Day here at Fark.
2004-04-05 03:28:23 PM  
this is the ghey.

this article in one form or another have been around since the begining of e-mail.

Fark the cutting edge of news.
2004-04-05 03:28:36 PM  
This is the second article they've repeated today.

2004-04-05 03:28:48 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-04-05 03:30:18 PM  
My commute to and from work has the temporary concrete construction barriers about 4" from the edge of the roadway. A bad sneeze could cost me a couple grand.
2004-04-05 03:30:20 PM  
Two weeks ago, my gf was stopped at a light, when a car plowed into her car from behind. Her car ended up with $5000 damage, and the car that hit her was totaled. When the police came, they interviewed the driver of the other car, and she said that it wasn't her fault because she was looking down changing CDs at the time. She said that she didn't have intent to hit my gf, so the responsibility for the accident should have been mutual.

The cop shook is head, and laughed. He told my gf and I that it was 100% her fault, and the report will show it. Other driver's dad came to pick her up, and almost had a heart attack when the officer told him that she admitted what she did.

Moral of the story: Some people should just stick to driving in Pole-Position or Bump 'n Jump.
2004-04-05 03:31:26 PM  
It was the invisable naked wemon along the road....Honest Officer
2004-04-05 03:31:50 PM  
So a repeat gets posted while my poor link lays dying!! Damn youse!! Damn youse all ta Helll!!!
2004-04-05 03:32:33 PM  
yes I know it's miss spelled
2004-04-05 03:33:23 PM  
* The driver who blamed his collision on a "bloody woman".
It later transpired she was in her upstairs bedroom window getting undressed and the man was so preoccupied watching her that he crashed his Aston Martin DB7 into a gate pillar on his house.

so she was getting undressed, did she pull out her tampon while this guy was watching?
2004-04-05 03:35:26 PM  
2004-04-05 03:35:49 PM  
The same thing happened to me. Stupid cross-eyed old man!
2004-04-05 03:37:05 PM  
Jeebus, chitownmike, just... jeebus...

2004-04-05 03:37:23 PM  
The admins must be in the middle of a shift change.

When the cops in my town are changing shifts, riots break out.
2004-04-05 03:38:00 PM  
Fantastic repeat, right down to the html error...
2004-04-05 03:38:21 PM  
anyone know anything about a dead whale?
2004-04-05 03:41:20 PM  
anyone know anything about a dead whale?

Well, rumor has it, and I'm not sure about this, that Vientamese people worship them.
2004-04-05 03:42:47 PM  
Deja Vu?
2004-04-05 03:45:20 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-04-05 03:45:38 PM  
Good evening. Tonight on 'It's the Mind', we examine the phenomenon of deja vu. That strange feeling we sometimes get that we've lived through something before, that what is happening now has already happened
2004-04-05 03:46:02 PM  
Who gets a DB7 as a company lieves headache and eases insomnia. It can be applied full strength to burns, rashes or psoriasis.
2004-04-05 03:46:27 PM  
I rember this one time, I was reading this thread on about people complaining about repeats. But I didn't finish reading all the comments, because I was hungry, so I stuck my $2 bill in my pocket, and went down to Taco Bell..
2004-04-05 03:47:58 PM  
From now on you'll have no identifying marks of any kind. You'll not stand out in any way. Your entire image is crafted to leave no lasting memory with anyone you encounter. You're a rumor, recognizable only as deja vu and dismissed just as quickly. You don't exist; you were never even born. Anonymity is your name.
2004-04-05 03:51:29 PM  
My sister was dating this Fark admin and they were getting very serious. My father never liked him at all and I could never figure out why. I thought it was cuz he repeated himself all the time. Well it turns out his father was the District Attorney!!
2004-04-05 03:51:44 PM  
Persons interested in learning more are advised to enroll in a program and to study a good manual.
2004-04-05 03:51:47 PM  
A guy driving a DB7 crashed because of a woman? Was it James Bond?
Seriously, there's a utility pole that nearly became accessorized by my 1988 Cavalier because Marianne was out washing her car while wearing a bikini.
2004-04-05 03:53:17 PM  
Jasper Carrot did a sketch about this sort of thing once, reading reports from Australian insurance companies. One of my favourites was (cue Aussie accent):
"I saw the face of a sad, slow-moving old gentleman as he bounced off the bonnet of my car."
2004-04-05 03:54:03 PM  
"I swerved to hit a tree that wasn't there." p"The horse came out of nowhere and landed on my car."

I don't remember seeing that 'p' before...what's it there for?
2004-04-05 03:54:49 PM  
deja vu

this was submitted earlier w/an equally unamusing headline
2004-04-05 03:55:01 PM  
what do you mean this is a repea lieves headache and eases insomnia. It can be applied full strength to burns, rashes or psoriasis
2004-04-05 03:55:47 PM  
My commute to and from work has the temporary concrete construction barriers about 4" from the edge of the roadway. A bad sneeze could cost me a couple grand.

same thing here...except a sneeze combined with sun glare did cause a couple grand in damage. I do however take responsibility, should have remembered my sun glasses.
2004-04-05 03:56:04 PM  
squirrelsarebitingyou, It's the Day of Spelling Errors. No whut I meen?
2004-04-05 03:56:11 PM  
Good evening. Tonight on 'It's the Mind', we examine the phenomenon of deja vu. That strange feeling we sometimes get that we've lived through something before, that what is happening now has already happened.

(How could I resist?)
2004-04-05 03:56:25 PM  
"Bloody" = British English for "Freakin'".

I'm torn. On the one hand, I love the idea of women undressing in front of windows. On the other hand, I am horrified by the idea of an Aston Martin being harmed outside of a Bond flick.
2004-04-05 03:58:38 PM  
how bout them n lemons?
2004-04-05 04:01:41 PM  
I know, I know! Still hard to believe...
2004-04-05 04:02:47 PM  
That article changed gears way to quick. No new paragraph or anything.
2004-04-05 04:05:35 PM  
When we were kids my mother backed her car into my father's car while he was pulling in the driveway. They blamed eachother for years. I think I'll bring it up to next time I see them.
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2004-04-05 04:07:19 PM  

Was she naked?
2004-04-05 04:10:27 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
A serious disturbance in the Fark Space-Time continuum, has cause up to be down left to be right, and previously posted news stories to repeat themselves this afternoon. Also known as a brain fart, or click happy admin.
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