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		Boy, 13, threatens parents with kitchen knife after Dad unplugs his videogame (reuters.com)		196
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14027 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Mar 2004 at 9:04 PM | Favorite | share:

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slavecycle		2004-03-15 11:01:27 PM

Weaver95: Again, your point is taken but fails to counter mine. Like I said, it happened to me, and my parents didn't go overboard with it. I don't even remember being spanked after I was... maybe... 6 or 7 years old. Still happened.

Also: Don't you think 13 is a little too old?

Sage2k		2004-03-15 11:05:46 PM

Hmm.. as much as I love Corporal Punishment (( Gives me a reason to biatch-slap my teachers )) I for one.. can tell you, If you "discipline" a child by hitting them.. It makes them hate and resent the person even more, leading to more widly behavior.

I'm a single child, and my mother has never hit me.. When she rasies her voice I know that I'm being out of line and need to chill out. My grandmother was a big fan of "Corporal Punishment" aka Child Abuse, When she died.. No one gave a shiat.

Sage2k		2004-03-15 11:07:02 PM

Wild Behavior*

Sorry about the typo..

nomales		2004-03-15 11:10:00 PM

Sorry to tell you but spanking does work. Sure you dont beat them till they drop, but a good solid smack on the ass can get across a lot more than words. Anyone who thinks of it in a sexual manner, teh farked up.

Dark Bastion		2004-03-15 11:10:49 PM

I dunno what the "right" age is to stop spanking. I'd say I wasn't spanked after 10. If I farked up in high school, my dad would talk to me like a normal human being and tell me things like, "you know this means no car and no weekends out for x amount of time." But when my little sister was being a snotty litte biatch her Freshman year, yeah, she deserved the giant handprint-inducing smack she got on her face (from my mom). I can't articulate when it's right and wrong with regards to spanking,but I think (most) parents know the difference between spanking and abuse. It worked for me and my siblings. Thankfully, I'm not going to have to worry about raising kids, 'cause I don't want any of the little farkers.

guytoronto		2004-03-15 11:12:04 PM

At 13, this kid deserved one thing. To have his father beat the living s**t out of him for waving the knife around.

And when the cops show up, tell them "my son came at my wife and me with a knife, so I subdued him".

That kid would never pull a stupid stunt like that again.

P.S. Kids shouldn't have video game systems anyway. What a waste of time and money.

Sage2k		2004-03-15 11:12:59 PM

Nomales

A small spanking might be okay when they are young, But 6,7,8 Years of age is total bullshiat.. Thats when it turns into Abuse.

I have friends who remember being spanked/smacked when they were 7 and they all say its effected them in one way or another.

Dark Bastion		2004-03-15 11:14:07 PM

guytoronto

Yeah, screw video games, let's go post on fark!

/the irony ... it is so rich!

Guest		2004-03-15 11:15:41 PM

In my opinion the father should have hit the child a good hard punch and knocked him out.

This had nothing to do with the video game it had to do with a young boy challenging the pecking order and he used violence and actual physical encounter to do it. Therefore that is the level he was challenging.

Now hopefully the father managing to actually restrain him will make the boy realise his order in the family. Sorry he is a boy and he does not have the power or say so of his father.

However, it maybe because his father did not fully show his strength that the boy may know see him as less important and infact foolishly believe that he is higher up the totem pole then he is before.

This is the same thing as when a young dog takes on a more senior dog in a pack.

Millbudda		2004-03-15 11:16:33 PM

This is why there needs to be 3rd world camps set up for these little farktards. Send them to Nigeria for a while and see if they're not farking grateful for every little luxury they get.

/born in 3rd world country and knows better.

nomales		2004-03-15 11:17:05 PM

2004-03-15 11:12:59 PM Sage2k

Nomales

A small spanking might be okay when they are young, But 6,7,8 Years of age is total bullshiat.. Thats when it turns into Abuse.

I have friends who remember being spanked/smacked when they were 7 and they all say its effected them in one way or another.

How many kids do you have?

Girion47		2004-03-15 11:18:16 PM

Millbudda you send em to Nigeria and all they'll do is make the grammar better for those nice guys that want to hold onto our money.

TonySoprano		2004-03-15 11:20:46 PM

Well, unplug the game you get the knife! Parents need to figure it out!

-T

excreationist		2004-03-15 11:20:49 PM

Weaver95 wrote:
"But the basic foundation for discipline still *must* be corporal. It's the only thing that works at that age."

I disagree. I suspect that you and your friends just don't know how to discipline young kids without using physical punishment.

If you have an open mind I recommend you read "Discipline Without Shouting or Spanking: Practical Solutions to the Most Common Preschool Behavior Problems" by Jerry L. Wyckoff and Barbara C. Undell.

Or at least check out the customer reviews here:
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0743228545/
That link also lets you look inside the book by clicking on the book's cover. Note that its advice is fairly complicated and partly talks about prevention. i.e. it's approach is more than just "do whatever you normally do - just don't spank them".

Walljasper		2004-03-15 11:22:08 PM

Uh, here's a headline for a followup story if that were my kid.

"Boy Found With computer game DVD stuffed up his ass"

slavecycle		2004-03-15 11:22:09 PM

I love how the people that disagree with me don't have a point except to say "you're wrong" or "you're farked up."

Sorry people, that doesn't cut it. This is one of those times where you're going to have to use your brain instead of your fist.

slavecycle		2004-03-15 11:24:23 PM

excreationist: It's complicated. Spankers are generally too stupid to understand complicated books (or many books at all, besides maybe the Bible... although usually it's other people explaining it to them. I'm getting off the subject now.)

I wish some sort of nuclear space anomaly would hit Earth sterilize everyone.

Pimpb0t3000		2004-03-15 11:25:58 PM

I'm glad spanking worked out for some of ya'all, but sometimes it really screws everything over. Me and my brother were both spanked, and while I don't really feel it did anything to me, my brother didn't take well to it. He would get smacked, get pissed, try harder, get smacked, get pissed, try even harder. The cycle never stopped, and all it did was lead to a beating that wasn't gonna change his mind. If the child is submissive by nature spanking works, well. But if the kid is headstrong it just pisses them off to the point where they wanna try harder. Using a general approach on humans never works, different kids are gonna react differently to different situations. Saying that one way is the best way only leads to ignorance and conflict. I know this is the fark forums and all, but how about everyone takes a step back and realizes there's more than one way to get the job done. Me personally, I wouldn't spank unless the kid did something worth being spanked over (stole, beat some other kid, vandalised something).

slavecycle		2004-03-15 11:25:58 PM

Here's a test. A 13 year old GIRL is spanked by her mother. You honestly have no sexual feelings about that at all? Even if you watched it?

Crabby Appleton		2004-03-15 11:26:59 PM

I'm not Chinese, so take this with a gain of salt, but it was my impression that corporal punishment is pretty standard in HK Chinese families. Back in grad school, a close friend from Hong Kong told me she used to live in fear of the "American-made feather duster." (Not the feathers, the shaft... so to speak.) Apparently the eldest brother is generally authorized to correct his younger siblings in this manner. I'll always treasure the look she gave me when I asked her about that; apparently, gweilos aren't supposed to know this stuff :-)

Also, I seriously doubt that disciplinary spankings in childhood induce the spanking fetish. Consider how many people were spanked and don't have that fetish. (E.g., just about everybody in the southern U.S.)

But just in case it does, we should definitely keep on spanking. How sad it would be if there were no more spankos :-(

slavecycle		2004-03-15 11:28:03 PM

Crabby: I live in the South.

nomales		2004-03-15 11:33:38 PM

2004-03-15 11:25:58 PM slavecycle

Here's a test. A 13 year old GIRL is spanked by her mother. You honestly have no sexual feelings about that at all? Even if you watched it?

Nope, perhaps you have deep issues with your mommy. A good spanking gets the point across. Never done in anger, only to correct behavior. My parents did, and I dont think about spanking 13 yo girls.

freakemart		2004-03-15 11:34:08 PM

NO! I WAS ON THE EIGHTEENTH HOLE!

/hopes somebody got that

Ghastly		2004-03-15 11:35:12 PM

2004-03-15 11:25:58 PM slavecycle

Here's a test. A 13 year old GIRL is spanked by her mother. You honestly have no sexual feelings about that at all? Even if you watched it?

Where's the website? Was this posted to Fark?

What?! What!?

I'm just askin'.

Was she hot?

psyxologos		2004-03-15 11:35:25 PM

guys, I need your help.

How do we call this "theorem" that after sufficient time in highly debated matters on fark.com someone throws the "nazi" word and automatically loses the debate ?

It has a name. and there was also a link. could you please post it here ?

Guest		2004-03-15 11:37:04 PM

I think this is a different situation then normal discipline. I think this is a boy taking on the man.

That is why I think the father should have hit him.

As said before it had nothing to do with the game
It had nothing to do with being told no
It had to do with the boy deciding he was higher up the totem pole and the reason the father should have used violence is that is the weapon of choice the boy used.

This was b/w boy and man not between child and parent.

GuinnessDrinker		2004-03-15 11:37:27 PM

This is a good example of why spankings are an effective management tool.

Um...no. Maybe the kid is violent because the father acts violently toward him on a regular basis? Violence doesn't curtail violence, it encourages it. I hope you're not a parent.

RockIsDead		2004-03-15 11:37:35 PM

I have friends who remember being spanked/smacked when they were 7 and they all say its effected them in one way or another.

Wasn't that it's point?

Ghastly		2004-03-15 11:39:27 PM

2004-03-15 09:10:29 PM ununcle
This is a good example of why spankings are an effective management tool.

I don't recall it mentioning anywhere in the article the kid wasn't spanked.

Considering that some parents who have been murdered by their children also spanked their children as a form of discipline I find this one article hardly proof that if you spank your children they won't pull a knife on you.

Hell, prisons are chock full o' people who were spanked regularily by their parents as a form of discipline.

Crabby Appleton		2004-03-15 11:43:56 PM

slavecycle: Crabby: I live in the South.

I don't see your point. Are you saying that a significant fraction of the Southern population are spankos? If so, I'm moving back down there.

Manifest		2004-03-15 11:45:41 PM

Rans for mod.

GuinnessDrinker		2004-03-15 11:48:05 PM

If this were my child the following would happen

1- He would be banished to his room until an uspescified date. Said room would be stripped of everything except a bed, 1 pillow, 1 blanket, and books.

2- He would lose the video game FOREVER. He would not be allowed to turn on the telelvision without permission and when he did turn it on he would only be allowed to watch pbs, the history channel, and a&e. He would be banished to his room when I felt like playing the video game and I would pump it up really loud so that he could hear me playing with it.

3- The only thing he would be allowed to do is school work, Sports if he is into that ( to keep him in shape ) or play a musical instrument if he is into that.

The only way to break kids is to take away everything that is important to them so that they realize that you own their very happyness, and to behave in such a manner is to lose it.

Pav: not too bad. Although I feel that playing the video game loudly and flaunting it in his face is a bit much, I think most of the other ideas there (directing the kid to learn useful information and having him participate in positive activities) are a pretty sound way of managing the situation. Having said that though, I think it's pretty obvious that this kid, and probably the whole family, is pretty farked up. It's too late to do anything about it when he's pulling a knife on his dad. Probably learned it from watching his dad pull a knife on his mom. These asshats saying "beat the shiat out of the kid" are hypocrites of the first order; it's alright for a dad to punch, kick and knock his son's teeth out, but when the kid does the same thing back it's wrong. How is a father beating his son any better than a son pulling a knife on his dad? I sense a double standard here. Violence encourages violence. If the kid hadn't grown up in a screwed up home to begin with, he wouldn't have done this. The only solutions I can see at this point, unfortunately, are either putting the entire family behind bars or getting them some pretty heavy counseling.

smitty112485		2004-03-15 11:49:02 PM

"Plug it back in, father, or you're ass is chop suey!"

/obligatory
/ducks flames
/aware that chop suey is an American invention.

Brewski_OR		2004-03-15 11:50:28 PM

As the father of three preteen boys, my fists are already cocked to unload on the one who first decides to physically challange my role as alpha. Not the typical challange to authority, but the in your face, what you gonna do about it challange.

I won't hurt him badly and it will be over quick, but he will remember the day. Hopefully it doesn't happen but I'm sure at least one will try.

I imagine this happens more than most people would care to know. Kids will test a parent's authority in every manner they think might be effective, until proven wrong.

Oh, the artilcle, I threaten my kids with a knife if they interrupt my gaming. Leave me the Fark alone, I don't care if you are hungry.

GuinnessDrinker		2004-03-15 11:55:43 PM

I was spanked as a kid.

I was also beaten by my Dad.

There is a big difference... the spankings helped train me.
The beatings give me nightmares to this day.

Not as black and white as knee-jerk liberals like to put it.

/ moderate liberal

That might be true...I was given both also, and I consider it a pretty traumatic experience. I don't know how different I would have turned out if I was only "spanked", but I tend to put it all in the same picture. It is NOT, however, only "knee-jerk liberals" that have a problem with this sort of thing. I am moderately conservative and I think that hitting your children is wrong. People who label others as "liberal" or "conservative" based on their views of child discipline are the ones black-and-whiting the issue.

my_morning_jacket		2004-03-15 11:56:29 PM

I wish the mom had called the police so they could have shot him dead(like the retard who got wasted for holding a knife about a week ago.. that turned into a nasty flame war).

loogel		2004-03-16 12:02:35 AM

sounds like how my brother used to be. got out of the phase......thank god.

GuinnessDrinker		2004-03-16 12:04:17 AM

Oh yeah, and the whole "spanking" thing:

Me, older and younger sister, and younger brother: spanked. Honor roll, varsity, college, great relationship with parents.

Cousins and parent's friends that didn't spank: drug addictions, drop outs, unplanned pregnancies, kids hate their parents.

Not saying it works for everyone, but you can't argue with results.

Dark Bastion:

Me: spanked.

Honor roll, Mensa member, 1/2 scholarship to college, aspiring psychologist, no major drug addictions.

Also, post-traumatic stress disorder (recurring nightmares about the incidents), 2 suicide attempts, on anti-depressants for life.

The items in the first category didn't come about as a result of me being spanked; they're a consequence of my natural abilities and character.

See what happens when you jump to conclusions?

Also, sorry about the repetitive posting everyone. It's late at night and I've been reading the thread and posting to different replies as I go along. Just thought that I had to make a point; I'll cool it now for a while.

No_One_Special		2004-03-16 12:05:53 AM

I feel sorry for the ones in here who are saying spanking is "violent".

Just as an example, (boring life story shiat, feel free to pass) after my parents split, I lived with Dad, my brother lived with Mom. Dad was a softy. Mom, on the other hand, was quite generous with the spanking. According to your reasoning, I should be a well-adjusted and enlightened being with an inate sense of ethics and a higher mode of thinking, and my brother should be an emotionally crippled, violent outcast with constant nightmares.

In reality:
I turned into a stoner in high school and slacked off for a few years afterward before getting my head straight and going to college, and am now doing fine.

My brother graduated high school at the top of his class, and went straight to some hoity-toity Ivy-league college on a full scholarship.

We're both doing fine now, but I had to learn from the school of hard knocks what he was taught at home. I'm going to spank my kids, and he is going to spank his. Our mother is very proud of both of us.

Emperor-Jay		2004-03-16 12:17:37 AM

Some farkers here are saying 13 is too old to spank. Well then instead of spanking the kid, maybe his parents could have pimped him out to the nearest gay BDSM club.

freakemart		2004-03-16 12:23:22 AM

GuinnessDrinker

It looks like, to me, you're getting "spanking" and "beating" confused. Spankings were purely disciplinary for me and were enough to let me know what would happen the next time I was out of line. They are pretty necessary to make sure your kids keep some respect for you and to let them know they can't just do whatever and the worst that will happen is they'll be sent to their room where they would be playing anyway. No child is going to behave if all that happens every time they do something wrong is that Mom or Dad will tell them to play in their room for a little while.

I guess my point is that spanking is essential to raising children assuming it isn't done unneccessarily nor to excess.

Memoryalpha		2004-03-16 12:29:20 AM

No, I wont feed the troll by laughing openly at his admission of psychological/emotional disturbance. If it turns you on, get help dude. If you think it turns others on, get help dude. I have, One sister, Four brothers, all of us were hellions. A peach tree switch worked wonders on our behavior and none of us have scars to show from it. Remember this, you are not dealing with a human being, you are dealing with a wild animal, a cunning, amoral monster is the best youll end up with if you dont get their attention quickly and keep it. Give one chance to obey. If refused, then you ask how many additional swats they want to receive. Make it very clear that they arent avoiding the first swat they've earned, they are avoiding more. The problem with the linked story is simply that it should never have come to the child pulling a knife on his parent. His parents have already failed him. He may be salvageable, but somehow I doubt it with the level of media coverage this has gotten. "Arent you the one who tried to stab your dad over a video game?" Oh and as to the ones who just couldnt spank a child, look at the world that not spanking them has brought about. Judicious discipline works, and there is a huge difference between discipline and sexual abuse. Discipline is about removing SOME of the wild animal from the child, but not all of it. Just enough to make them manageable in a family environment but still strong enough to survive in the world as it is today. Take it all away and you get some neurotic little nothing that really cant survive outside of a sheltered environment. A hothouse flower so to speak. One chill breeze and it dies. Its all about balance and always has been. On the other hand, sexual abuse is generally a result of the abuser having been abused his or herself and wanting to find someone they can take it out on, or worse, relive it through.

susansto-helit		2004-03-16 12:35:39 AM

Well, I was spanked as a kid and I've personally not been negatively affected by it. Despite being childfree from a very early age, I do like kids and I'm a certified baby sitter. I've never had to spank a child, thankfully. Time outs work just fine. But I can tell you, in all honesty, that stuff didn't work with me. I was one stubborn little b*tch and literally the only thing that worked with me was a swift swat to the arse. I even had to go through this multiple times as a little kid because, again, I was just that farking stubborn.

I'm just glad that the whole parental threat "you'll get yours when you have kids" thing will never apply to me. I can't imagine how stubborn offspring of mine would be.

Ghastly		2004-03-16 12:39:50 AM

Nearly any transgression in my house resulted in a spanking. All this resulted in was me hating my father to the point where I would pray for him to be killed in a car accident. It also resulted in my rationalizing "if people don't do what you want them to, then hit them until they do" which is why I was a bullying asshole to my younger brother and sister.

Seemed like a natural extention to me. I do something dad doesn't like, dad whips my ass with an extension chord. My little brother and sister do something I don't like. I beat on them until they do what I want them to. That's the way the world works.

It took me a long time to figure out that's not the way the world should work.

I don't spank my kids. They're disciplined, you can bet. They know that when a line is crossed they fear me like I was god almighty calling down thunder upon their asses. I'm strict and I don't put up with a lot of crap. But I've never needed to beat my kids (and spanking is just a euphimism for beating) in order to get them to capitulate to my demands.

My kids are very well behaved. They're creative and bright. They're consistantly in the top two percentile. Their teachers describe them as gifted. Although they certainly get into fights now and then there's absolutely no bullying between them like there was with me and my younger siblings when I was a kid.

My children also love me far more than I ever did, or am even capable of loving my own father. They've not once screamed at me "I wish you were dead" as I had at my own father many times after a beating (and I truly wished it).

That, above anything else, was the reason why I decided long before I had children that I would take the time and effort to learn and employ non-violent discipline on my children. It would truly break my heart for my children to wish me dead.

If you're a dull parent then perhaps spanking is the best you can come up with to discipline your children. It was in my dad's case. But that doesn't mean that spanking is the best form of discipline. Violence is only justified in self defence. It's not justifiable as discipline.

Jeese Louise. I served in my country's armed forces. I was trained to be violent. I was trained to kill. But even those training me to do so did not use violence to discipline me. They'd make me run, they'd make me do push-ups, they'd make me do all manner of demeaning and humiliating things but not one single NCO or officer ever raised a hand against me in violence as an act of discipline. If the army was able to discipline me without laying a beating on me then I think I should be able to discipline my children without having to resort to violence as well.

Ghastly		2004-03-16 12:41:30 AM

Oh... incidently, I'm not saying I don't spank.

I'm just saying I don't spank my kids.

All my spankings are reserved for my wife and they're of the "hurts so good" variety.

GraphicAddiction		2004-03-16 12:47:51 AM

Wife Beater.

Ghastly		2004-03-16 12:49:37 AM

2004-03-16 12:47:51 AM GraphicAddiction

Wife Beater.

No no. She's not my wife when I spank her. She's Monique, my saucy french maid and she's just spilled my custard tart.

KidneyStone		2004-03-16 12:53:00 AM

A few years ago I dated a woman with a four year old kid. The kid was getting really mouthy about something and I said I would spank her if she didn't stop. The mom told me to go ahead and spank her. Never having spanked a kid before I had not a clue what I was doing. I gave her a few smacks on the butt and the kid turns her head, looks me in the farking eye, and says....get this..."Mommy hits harder."

try to keep a straight face after something like that.....

ps: slavecycle - don't be playing spanky wanky after reading this....

KidneyStone		2004-03-16 12:55:18 AM

Ghastly - yer killin me........ :D

Ghastly		2004-03-16 12:56:07 AM

2004-03-16 12:53:00 AM KidneyStone

A few years ago I dated a woman with a four year old kid. The kid was getting really mouthy about something and I said I would spank her if she didn't stop. The mom told me to go ahead and spank her.

At this point I'd be thinking "Damn! I gotta start dating me some women with teenage daughters."

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