FARK.com: (871319) Tom Cruise fires his publicist for discouraging him to obsess publicly over Scientology

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(New York Daily News)		Tom Cruise fires his publicist for discouraging him to obsess publicly over Scientology (nydailynews.com)		182
		More: Asinine

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12260 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2004 at 4:27 PM | Favorite | share:

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Eat More Possum		2004-03-13 02:25:44 PM

Say what you want about Cruise being a nutbag, he porked Nicole Kidman and none of us poor Farkers will.

OpusSoup		2004-03-13 02:44:52 PM

Can you discourage someone to do something, or do you discourage from?

mizike		2004-03-13 03:49:15 PM

Bumper Sticker:
"Xenu is my co-pilot... and we're out Cruisin' for pussy!"

Have You Met Miss Jones		2004-03-13 04:29:56 PM

L. Ron Hubbard invented a hackneyed religion and all I got was this stupid t-shirt. (And I had to pay Issac Hayes $10 for it!)

samperkinsdog		2004-03-13 04:30:20 PM

my gundam told me to take the role.

it's not a cult!

BLIAD THE IMPALER		2004-03-13 04:33:07 PM

I gave Scientology THIS many million dollars!

El_Swino		2004-03-13 04:33:13 PM

Discourage from.

Encourage to.

ToStupidTooCare		2004-03-13 04:35:28 PM

But Cruise's sister LeeAnne Devette, also a Scientologist,

another unbiased source of information...

ExitKloie		2004-03-13 04:36:04 PM

1. Open a whorehouse in your house.
2. profit.
3. mess with a killerpimp guido
4. lose profit.

Weaver95		2004-03-13 04:36:37 PM

[Cruise, a member of the Church of Scientology for years, has been talking more recently about its controversial beliefs - saying, for instance, "psychiatry should be outlawed."]

Why would he want psychiatry outlawed? I guess crazy people don't like being sane?

Speaking of cults, my free total*fark days are apparently at an end. Seems someone finally got around to reading my email about the subject!

fredsanford		2004-03-13 04:37:04 PM

I blame inspector gadget.

TimeCubeFan		2004-03-13 04:37:09 PM

Tinky Winky fired HIS publicist too

Aesculapius4		2004-03-13 04:37:24 PM

Oooh, Scientology. Kool-Aid anyone?

qburt		2004-03-13 04:38:00 PM

I wish I founded Scientology... I would be a millionare....

Ghastly		2004-03-13 04:38:13 PM

These celebrity scientologists don't seem to realize that their scientology isn't the same scientology as that of the average scietology zombie signed up for a billion years of slave labour.

If I walked into the local scientology recruitment centre do you think I'd be relaxing, getting steak and blowjobs in the Scientology Celebrity Centre? Yeah right. Maybe I'll get to go to the Scientology "Internet Celebrity" Centre. But instead of stead and blowjobs all I'll get are some unsalted soda crackers and a pinch on the bum. I'm already getting that when I go to comic conventions anyways so why bother?

CanadianCommie		2004-03-13 04:38:32 PM

why the hell are celebrities all Scientologists? I have never met anyone with a networth below 5 million dollars that believes in that shiat

holierthanthou		2004-03-13 04:38:57 PM

Can someone explain to me what Scientology is all about, and in 30 words or less? I don't have all day here.

after_berlin		2004-03-13 04:39:35 PM

When psychiatry is outlawed,
only outlaws will, um, be psychiatrized.

or somethin'.

TommyymmoT		2004-03-13 04:39:43 PM

More Possum
Say what you want about Cruise being a nutbag, he porked Nicole Kidman and none of us poor Farkers will.

Oh yeah? Well I porked her twice last night. Then, I woke up.

/Can't imagine why nobody wants to do my laundry.

Sgt Otter		2004-03-13 04:40:14 PM

Say what you want about Cruise being a nutbag, he porked Nicole Kidman and none of us poor Farkers will.

Unless it was an arranged marriage to boost her profile and to help silence those pesky gay rumors that have dogged his career. Remember kids, they adopted.

/i'm just sayin'

Nudyy		2004-03-13 04:41:43 PM

Tom Cruise enjoy's using his last name for a night time sport. Just add a "ing" to the ending. For some reason I think he might be doing the night time activity with men, possibly with John Travolta, or his good old buddy Cuba Gooding Jr. They all have "gay" written in their flamboyancy. Tom Cruise sucks, and not at only acting.

BillCo		2004-03-13 04:41:57 PM

I'm founding a new religion. It's called the "Give me all your money and I will guarantee that you go to heaven" church. Please e-mail me for the address to send your money to.

mylow		2004-03-13 04:42:26 PM

Tom who?

trevian93		2004-03-13 04:43:29 PM

http://www.religioustolerance.org/scientol.htm

everything you wanted to know and more.....

Werbal_Kint		2004-03-13 04:43:34 PM

Newsflash: Tom Cruise has sex with L. Ron Hubbard's cyrogenically frozen colon every night.

Sgt Otter		2004-03-13 04:43:43 PM

Can someone explain to me what Scientology is all about, and in 30 words or less? I don't have all day here.

Billions of years ago, intergalatic warlord Xenu turns earth into interstellar concentration camp and kills billions of his enemies. Ghosts of those enemies possess your brain, making you think bad thoughts.

Scientology exorcises those ghosts (body thetans) from your brain.

I honestly wish I was joking.

TimeCubeFan		2004-03-13 04:44:11 PM

holierthanthou
What is scientology:
"75 million years ago, when Earth was known as Teegeeack, the evil galactic overlord XENU brought billions of space aliens here on DC-8 space planes, and blew them up in volcanos with hydrogen bombs. The spirits of these dead aliens infest our bodies to this day, and are the root cause of all man's problems. And for a price, $cientology can teach you how to get rid of them.

eraser8		2004-03-13 04:44:41 PM

I wonder when he'll start to obsess publicly about the whole "gay" thing.

Nudyy		2004-03-13 04:44:57 PM

fluxrad		2004-03-13 04:46:31 PM

holierthanthou

Scientology is basically a cult founded by L Ron Hubbard (the Sci-Fi author). Basically it's a sham religion for most people (think Dividian), but uses celebrities to promote membership and grab cash. Not much is known about the inner workings of Scientology because they're extremely secretive about shiat.

Knob_Gobbler		2004-03-13 04:48:09 PM

Can someone explain to me what Scientology is all about, and in 30 words or less? I don't have all day here.

Well, it involves, Xenu, an alien who once dealt with the galaxy's overpopulation problem by placing millions of creatures on earth and killing them all with hydrogen bombs. He is now a prisoner on a volcano on some planet. He is heald there with a force field that runs on a never ending battery.

The souls of these people that Xenu killed are called "Thetans". These are in every one of us. Through Scientology, you can become free of Thetans; the point they call "Clear".

I shiat you not. I only know all of these because I'm fascinated by the stupidity of people that follow this crap.

Joey2cool		2004-03-13 04:48:11 PM

BLIAD THE IMPALER: You forgot to say "going to hell now", but then again, whos really going there?

louiedog		2004-03-13 04:48:59 PM

If you search around you can find some of the secrets online. I guess when some of these people wise up after shelling out thousands they figure they'll do everyone a favor and show the stupid stuff that goes on with the religion.

Now, you can't tell me there aren't any scientologist farkers. Someone has to stumble in here and start defending it. I've been around long enough to know anything can turn into a flame war, no matter how stupid it is.

Weaver95		2004-03-13 04:52:21 PM

[If you search around you can find some of the secrets online.]

And if you're really lucky you'll find evidence of the lawsuits and various/sundry harrassment tactics the scientology drones have used to keep thier secret off the web. If nothing else, it's interesting reading.

holierthanthou		2004-03-13 04:52:48 PM

Haha, you're all very funny with the "Xenu" and "Thetan" stuff.

Now seriously, what's it all about?

Cthulus_Toaster		2004-03-13 04:54:01 PM

holierthanthou.

We are not farking kidding you. It is actually that seriously idiotic... They use various tactics of intimidation they are even rumored to have killed people who tried to leave their "Religion".

nytmare		2004-03-13 04:55:15 PM

It only takes talent, luck, and/or looks to be a successful actor. Brains aren't involved.

yotta		2004-03-13 04:55:27 PM

"In earlier years, he didn't talk about Scientology, and everybody said he was keeping it a big mystery. Now, he talks about it and it's wrong. It's damned if you do, damned if you don't."

But still he doesn't take the damned hint.

TimeCubeFan		2004-03-13 04:55:28 PM

holierthanthou
It'a about Xenu and Thetans and stuff. But you don't get to learn all those goodies until you've paid for those "upper level" sooper-sectets

Frostback		2004-03-13 04:57:34 PM

What makes anybody think he farked Nicole Kidman? It's inconceivable.

gopher321		2004-03-13 05:00:49 PM

Resurrected from previous thread...

"Who controls the British pound..."

kona		2004-03-13 05:00:50 PM

But how will I know for sure until I give it a try and send them all my money?

TimeCubeFan		2004-03-13 05:00:59 PM

BLADE THE IMPALER
An alternate caption to your TC image might be:
"Look ma, no cans"

Knob_Gobbler		2004-03-13 05:01:04 PM

holierthanthou

Go to this site. It has a lot of good information on this bullshiat.

www.xenu.net

Non_Bilateral_Symmetry		2004-03-13 05:01:32 PM

I have some theories why a reasonability intelligent actors* would choose $cientology.

Tax scam. -Pay tonnes of money into it for a tax write off then get it kicked back to them in other ways. Nu?

-----

*Most actor are as dumb as a post. Watch celebrity Jeopardy comedians=rule, actors=sad.

One good way to fix $cientology and all other cults is to eliminate ALL tax exempt status on ALL religions.
You pray -You pay!

Vaeric		2004-03-13 05:01:52 PM

Have fun reading:
Operation Clambake

catracho		2004-03-13 05:03:11 PM

The only good thing about Cruise right now is Penelope

yem_tex		2004-03-13 05:04:12 PM

"Can someone explain to me what Scientology is all about, and in 30 words or less? I don't have all day here."

Once you accept "Jesus" you will reach the level of "saved" and live up in the clouds and be happy forever and ever while everyone else will be forced into enternal misery in a sadistic spirtual holocaust.

Wait is that right? I think I'm confusing it with some othe money sucking cult...

Orosian		2004-03-13 05:04:53 PM

I'm founding a new religion. It's called the "Give me all your money and I will guarantee that you go to heaven" church. Please e-mail me for the address to send your money to.

nothing new in that.