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(AP) NewsFlash Martha Stewart found guilty of obstructing justice and lying to the government. Residency in federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison thought not to be a good thing   ( divider line
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19277 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Mar 2004 at 3:06 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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464 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-03-05 05:22:09 PM  
I can sympathize with those who think this is a textbook case of prosecutorial overreaching. But I can't help but think that an extremely wealthy woman risked everything for $50K. Stupidity and greed will fark you everytime.
2004-03-05 05:22:28 PM  
He'll be charged. They're just taking their time building their case. They're not going to "let him go". The Justice Department has a serious hard on to nail this guy.

Ken Lay is going to fall. The Feds are taking it nice and slow to build an airtight case. I would hate for the feds to do a half ass job and him get off.

I expect Mr. lay to take a trip to Europe or Asia and decide to not come home in the next year or two.
2004-03-05 05:23:43 PM  

The Stock Market crash of 1929 did mark the beginning of a worldwide Depression. I said nothing about the actions of the Roosevelt administations after that. I simply pointed out the obvious.

Fair enough. I apologize for jumping all over you. :)

Okay, I'm done for the day. I actually have work to do buoying up the stock market with my amazing productivity. :)
2004-03-05 05:24:17 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-03-05 05:24:44 PM  
"Of course. But anyone selling a stock which they know, from non-public knowledge, is about to tank is committing fraud."

Precisely. I don't think it should be that way (Business, politics and pretty much every other facet of life is based on who you know, what they know and how much it costs you), but the stock market has such a squeaky-clean reputation we can't let this sort of thing tarnish it.

I think it should be the same for everything. Either make any decisions and mergers made off non-public info illegal or allow insider trading. fark the double standard.

But then, that's what makes me a bad American.
2004-03-05 05:26:12 PM  
They should be punished according to whatever is specified in the contract between you and them.

I'm not really sure what your idea of law enforcement is, but things like theft, fraud, etc. are punished by prison sentences, not contractual fines. You're not going to get support from even the most strident laissez fair capitalists by promoting anarchy.
2004-03-05 05:26:13 PM  
It's funny that roy_d_mercer is defending Ken Lay.

Does anyone out there (Repub, Dem or Indy) really think Mr. Lay was ignorant of the bullshiate accounting fiasco that was going on at Enron?

Just to play devil's advocate, as CEO of the company, wouldn't he STILL be responsible for what was happening there, regardless of his direct involvement? Isn't that what the CEO title implies, that he is indeed running the show and would be responsible for its success or failure?
2004-03-05 05:28:06 PM  
Anyone who thinks she did this for the small reward is not thinking this through. She has done this before in my opinion, and got caught in a small transaction. The other thing that drives the rich is their dismissal of the little people, she could have got off with a fine and warning if she didn't think she was smarter than the rest of us and lied about it.
2004-03-05 05:29:42 PM  
Questions of selective prosecution aside, I just can't fathom the psychotic level of greed we've somehow managed to breed in this society. Here is someone with a near-billion dollar net worth who is going through hell over what are in relative terms, mere pennies: a lousy $51K she would have lost if she hadn't made the trade.'s not like anyone was ever going to think of her as an underachiever!
2004-03-05 05:30:01 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-03-05 05:32:33 PM  
I don't think it should be that way (Business, politics and pretty much every other facet of life is based on who you know, what they know and how much it costs you)

As a student of business, then, you should know that the unintended consequences of making insider trading legal will be a sharp decline in public investment, and possibly demand from stock shareholders for access to company proprietary information. And that just isn't going to happen. Good luck bridging the impass...
2004-03-05 05:39:51 PM  
Not to say anyone is more or less guilty than another, but wtf? Of course, the penalty phase has not yet been heard.

Maybe Martha should have tried to extort a state while hiding behind dummy corporations. She might have gotten off with a lighter sentence (former Houston resident).

I only hope that prosecutors pursue other corporate asshats with the same vigor.
2004-03-05 05:40:02 PM's a good thing.
2004-03-05 05:47:29 PM  
This is way late and has probably already been said by plenty of people but enough poor schmucks with a drug problems get farked for like 20 years that some white biatch who actually did something to get like 20 months is nice. Out of the thousands who are farked over cause they are too poor to get a decent lawyer it is nice to see some rich-ass biatch get caught.
2004-03-05 05:47:34 PM  
Hey, you know what would be funny? If someone made a joke about Martha Stewart decorating her prison cell.

2004-03-05 05:47:49 PM  
I can't believe she tried to cover it up. If she had admitted to it in the very beginning, no doubt a slap on the wrist would have followed. But the more she lied and proclaimed her innocence - the more trouble she got in.

She's still acting innocent. My God - the evidence was so obvious (from what i've read). The difference between OJ getting off and Martha's conviction was the Jury. If the cops had a videotape of OJ wiping off a bloody knife outside Nicole's apartment, the jury still would have acquitted. No winning that case.

If Martha's jury had been pretensious, white, middle-aged women from the Hamptons, I'm sure she could have walked too.
2004-03-05 05:48:17 PM  
...I like to tenderize that old fat biatch cow

now that is funny
2004-03-05 05:50:25 PM  
I'd say she made a poor choice.

Saved herself about 60k when she sold that stock.

Proceded to lose about half of her total worth in the following months as her stock plumeted.

2004-03-05 05:51:12 PM  
I am trying to figure out what kind of crime a guy has to commit to serve time with Pam Grier in one of those 70s women in prison flicks like "The Big Doll House." Unfortunately I think you have to be a Filipina to qualify or be willing to be castrated in an Attica-style break out.
2004-03-05 05:51:22 PM  
Martha was stupid to cover this up and lie about it, and she should be punished accordingly. But dammit, what she did was in relation to her own personal finances. She didn't bring down a corporation and ruin the lives of thousands of employees. In the grand scheme of things, what she did was a drop in the bucket compared to Enron and WorldCom. This was a total witch hunt from the get-go. I suppose she should have made a hasty million-dollar contribution to the RNC at the beginning of her troubles, and they would have all magically gone away.
2004-03-05 05:57:11 PM  
Couldn't have happened to a more evil and lying biatch.
2004-03-05 06:02:28 PM  
Thanks, now I have to clean my keyboard and monitor.
2004-03-05 06:02:57 PM  
Po Matha
2004-03-05 06:09:23 PM  
Anyone remember that Aussie womens' prison show from the '70's, Prisoner: Cell Block H? Definitely of the so bad it's good variety.

Man would these hellcats be waiting for Martha. They'd rip her to shreds. At first. She'd soon make a key ally and would soon be running the joint.
2004-03-05 06:10:17 PM  
Can anyone identify one single person who was harmed by the "crimes" of Sam Waksal, Peter Bacanovic or Martha Stewar?

The people who bought the stock she sold?

If you sell someone a car you know is going to fall apart the next day and don't tell the buyer, that's a crime under the Lemon Laws.

It's a similar principle. She sold pricy shares of stock to an unwitting buyer knowing full well the value would plummet the next day.
2004-03-05 06:15:35 PM  

OMG..I used to love that show. It came on an hour before the Bozo hour on WGN. The last show before summer vacation was over someone had put ground glass in Bea's tea and I never found out what happened....
2004-03-05 06:18:18 PM  
"Welcome to Hell, here's your accordian."

[image from too old to be available]
2004-03-05 06:27:19 PM  
I'd completely forgotten about til all this talk of women's prisons... I used to get a big laugh out of Lizzie Birdsworth, what a hag! And what about Franky Doyle!

And anyone who'd put glass in Bea's tea sure has balls. She was one tough mama.

This show was on before Bozo??? Wow. It used to run late night on a Detroit station when I saw it.
2004-03-05 06:41:21 PM  
look at the silly monkey!

anyhow, i think this is BS. politicians steal more money than that on a regular basis, and mr enron puts those figures to shame

they should sentence Ken Lay to death or maybe just labotomize him as a warning. sooner or later people are going to get fed up and we're going to have alot of anticorporate crazies running around with bombs.
2004-03-05 06:44:56 PM  
Man she got convicted of a federal crime that means she will be going to a
"Pound you in the ass Federal penitentiary"
Watch your cornhole Martha!!!
2004-03-05 06:52:16 PM  
It's only because libs don't like strong successful women.
2004-03-05 06:52:32 PM  
Do you think there has ever been a time in America where pumping sewage upstream from your neighbor has been legal? If you think so, you've haven't been reading the laws right.

It's not so absolute; the laws are just weakened. One of the first things George Bush did was to increase the acceptable amount (ppm) of arsenic pollution...
2004-03-05 06:52:58 PM  
Since her opinion was that she was innocent, how can they say she lied? Her opinion was that she was innocent. Someone's opinion can't be a lie unless they say their opinion is different than their opinion. Then they lied about their opinion. Pass the Jim Beam, I'm thinking too much like a lawyer.
2004-03-05 06:55:34 PM  
INSIDER TIP, Sell now Martha!!!

bwah ha ha ha..

2004-03-05 06:57:32 PM  
Hey, wait, wait, how about this one. . .

Next on Martha Stewart's Living . . How to bake a file in a cake. . . .

2004-03-05 07:19:08 PM  
finally, disorganized absent-minded slobs like me have a decent bid for world domination...
2004-03-05 07:21:48 PM  
CROWD: Burn her! Burn! Burn her!...
BEDEVERE: Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
CROWD: Tell us! Tell us!...
BEDEVERE: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
CROWD: Burn! Burn them up! Burn!...
BEDEVERE: And what do you burn apart from witches?
VILLAGER #1: More witches!
VILLAGER #2: Wood!
BEDEVERE: So, why do witches burn?
VILLAGER #3: B--... 'cause they're made of... wood?
BEDEVERE: So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood?
VILLAGER #1: Build a bridge out of her!
BEDEVERE: Does wood sink in water?
VILLAGER #2: No, it floats! It floats!
VILLAGER #1: Throw her into the pond!
CROWD: The pond! Throw her into the pond!
2004-03-05 07:33:07 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-03-05 08:00:20 PM  
Martha my dear though I spend my days in conversation
Remember me Martha my love
Don't forget me Martha my dear

Hold your head up you silly girl look what you've done
When you find yourself in the thick of it
Help yourself to a bit of what is all around you
Silly Girl.....

/[Psychic] Beatles, of course.
2004-03-05 08:10:53 PM  

[image from too old to be available]

2004-03-05 08:16:39 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

My image, feel free to download it for your own purposes.

2004-03-05 08:21:12 PM  
"As a student of business, then, you should know that the unintended consequences of making insider trading legal will be a sharp decline in public investment, and possibly demand from stock shareholders for access to company proprietary information. And that just isn't going to happen. Good luck bridging the impass..."

I suppose that's one way of looking at it, but it depends on how many people have access to this insdier info. It's possible many do and are sitting on it for fear of ending up like Martha if they act on it.

Or maybe you're right. It's pure speculation to assume, though.
2004-03-05 08:43:05 PM  

Thoughts on appeal strategies, and chances?

/always appreciate your insight and analysis. thanks
2004-03-05 09:36:17 PM  
18 months in federal pound you in bla bla bla i bet. she aint gonna get a club fed membership.
2004-03-05 09:43:07 PM  

Here's the reason she deserves to suffer. Someone bought those shares she dumped. They bought damaged goods from someone who knew of the defect. Just because it's stock in a market it's still a "product" that someone is selling and someone is buying.

Oh and Emperor-Jay has a good grasp of reality as well. Martha Stewart was/is a big time suck up to the Clintons. Bad timing.


Let this be a lesson to anyone who wants to commit stockmarket fraud: Make sure you're a member of the current reigning political party first.

2004-03-05 09:57:48 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2004-03-05 10:14:33 PM  
I never can understand why people defend rich people when they get caught for breaking the law. Is it because some of you harbor this notion that someday you will be rich and then all the rich people will be your friends because you were always nice to them or something?

If you have any doubts regarding what kind of a person Stewart is, cruise over to the smoking gun and search the archives, my favorite is the gardner she tried to run over with her van when she was afraid that he was on her property, but thats just me.
2004-03-05 10:22:06 PM  
There we go, down 22%.
2004-03-05 10:22:23 PM  
*wonders if there will be a prison cam?*
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2004-03-05 10:22:57 PM  
I looked up the offenses in the sentencing guidelines. Base offense level 14 for the most serious charge (obstructing agency investigation, 18 USC 1505), no obvious adjustments up or down, no criminal history = 15-21 month sentence. If she had been convicted only of making false statements she would have been eligible for probation.
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