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(Some Guy) Audio Fun Jesus Chainsaw Massacre parody (middle of page) (possibly not safe for work)   (x1023.com) divider line 118
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7975 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Mar 2004 at 1:40 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2004-03-05 01:44:07 PM
I still pee myself every time I see the words "Jesus Chainsaw Massacre"
 
2004-03-05 01:44:08 PM
The movie title parody is teh old and busted.
 
2004-03-05 01:47:38 PM
Farked
 
2004-03-05 01:47:49 PM
Farked already?
 
2004-03-05 01:48:02 PM
The bartender was washing his glasses, and an elderly Irishman came in and with great difficulty, hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, asked for a sip of Irish whiskey.

The Irishman looked down the bar and said, "Is that Jesus down there?" The bartender nodded and the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish whiskey also.

The next patron was an ailing Italian with a hunched back and slowness of movement. He shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of Chianti. He also looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting down there. The bartender nodded and the Italian said to give Him a glass of Chianti, also.

The third patron, a redneck, swaggered in dragging his knuckles on the floor and hollered. "Barkeep, set me up a cold one. Hey, is that God's Boy down there?" The barkeep nodded, and the redneck told him to give Jesus a cold one too.

As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over to the Irishman and touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed!" The Irishman felt the strength come back to his leg, and he got up and danced a jig to the door.

Jesus touched the Italian and said, "For your kindness you are healed!" The Italian felt his back straighten and he raised his hands above his head and did a flip out the door.

Jesus walked toward the redneck, and the redneck jumped back and exclaimed, "Don't touch me, I'm drawing disability!"
 
2004-03-05 01:51:32 PM
Jesus Chainsaw Massacre = not funny
 
2004-03-05 01:52:14 PM
Just About Farked.... Damn Companies And There Low Bandwidth
 
2004-03-05 01:54:57 PM
Heh skinink... Penny for an ex-leper?
 
2004-03-05 01:54:58 PM
CruJones, it may not be funny, but it is so fitting. I was nauseous and had a headache all day last Sunday after tseeing that movie.
 
2004-03-05 01:55:19 PM
CruJones
Jesus Chainsaw Massacre = not funny

Very true. Old fast and unfunny to begin with.
 
2004-03-05 01:56:05 PM
I can see your house.
 
rdr
2004-03-05 02:00:38 PM
Jesus Chainsaw Massacre = not funny

Yes, it is. If Mel wants to spend a few million to fan the flames of religious hysteria at a time when the world really doesn't need it, then those of us who think the entire thing is a quaint fiction based upon an amazingly old and busted meme are darn well going to have a few giggles at his expense.

I firmly believe that every person should follow whatever faith (or not) he or she chooses, and generally try to keep my own opinions to myself. But enough is enough...
 
2004-03-05 02:01:18 PM
Headline is Not Funny. And busted. Did the poster even see the movie? Maybe he just has is in for Catholics.
 
2004-03-05 02:03:48 PM
Making fun of Jesus is fun! Especially if you have no personal integrity, imagination, innovative thought, are completely trite, blase', cliche', and moronic.

Jesus is too easy folks, and of course, not really very funny either.
 
2004-03-05 02:04:30 PM
Farked.

Headline is Funny (macabre)

Life is too important to take seriously.

/Buddhist
 
2004-03-05 02:05:04 PM
I for one welcome our new chainsaw wielding overlords.
 
2004-03-05 02:05:35 PM
rdr: I'm not talking about making fun of the movie, just that particular title. It sucks.

And what did Mel do to fan the flames? He spent his own money to make a movie that originally wasn't even supposed to have subtitles. The media is the one that caused hysteria. Mel didn't even really care if it was widely distributed or not. And by the way, I personally could care less about the movie. I haven't seen it, and probably won't.
 
2004-03-05 02:06:32 PM
AND boobies ala BlackInk
 
2004-03-05 02:07:31 PM
I prefer "I Spit On Your Cross"
 
2004-03-05 02:07:40 PM
'Jesus Chainsaw Massacre' is making fun of the movie. I for one think it's funny. I would venture to guess that those who say it's "old", didn't think it was funny to begin with. For most of them, probably because they find it offensive. Which is fine by me. I still get a little chuckle out of it.
 
2004-03-05 02:07:55 PM
Real easy solution folks, don't go see the movie.

Then, you are supporting it, or giving your money to it.

People who make fun of Buddha, Jesus, Ganesh, Judaism, Hindu, Islam, etc. are pretty weak. The target is too big, too obvious, and too overdone.

Of course, I agree there are no sacred cows in comedy, but, at least be funny.

teh ghey
 
2004-03-05 02:08:56 PM
ooops, aren't supporting it.
 
2004-03-05 02:10:47 PM
jesus chainsaw massacre
it's funny because it's ironic

/discuss
 
2004-03-05 02:11:08 PM
Nameless_One
Headline is Not Funny. And busted. Did the poster even see the movie? Maybe he just has is in for Catholics.

OK, I'll bite. What slight against Catholics did you see in the headline?
 
RDS
2004-03-05 02:11:16 PM
Funny how The Passion of the Christ has been given the 'nic': "Jesus Chainsaw Massacre" on Fark...not appreciated...one has to wonder if you would have thought up a derogatory title for a movie like 'The Pianist' or 'Schindler's List'...
 
2004-03-05 02:11:51 PM
Not liking the Passion or Narnia means your aren't Christianically Correct.
 
2004-03-05 02:12:58 PM
It's a commercial venture. Due some parody. If Gibson was serious about conveying a message, he would done this for free. Maybe to save souls, not increase savings.
 
2004-03-05 02:26:34 PM
Making fun of tEh Jebus is easy if you are not superstitious.
The Jebus hangs out with the Easter Bunny, and keeps him as a pet ...
 
2004-03-05 02:26:39 PM
The nickname is funny, and not because it makes fun of Jesus or Christians. I laugh at it because THE PASSION is many more times violent than any other movie I have seen (that is not a criticism, just an observation -- I don't mind violence in movies), yet some of the same people who complain that there is too much violence in movies, music, and video games have no trouble taking their young'uns to see it. Again, that doesn't bother me at all, but the nickname just points out the hypocrisy of the situation.

And that, Mrs. Foxboro, is what Jesus Chainsaw Massacre means to me. Do I get an A?

3Col
 
2004-03-05 02:27:25 PM
I prefer the title "Jesus Christ: Chainsaw Masacre" because it brings to light "Jesus Christ: Superstar" but that's just me.

Wait...how is Jesus Chainsaw Masacre offensive?

It's making fun of a movie...not Jeebus.
 
2004-03-05 02:28:23 PM
RDS:

Save your energy. No doubt the porn industry will make their own version of "The Passion of Christ". After all, they did film something called "Shaving Ryan's Privates", etc.
 
2004-03-05 02:33:39 PM
"Wait...how is Jesus Chainsaw Masacre offensive?"

this is fark. you'll always find somebody who's offended.
 
2004-03-05 02:34:37 PM
The Pianist... (snicker) pianist... pianist...
 
RDS
2004-03-05 02:34:57 PM
Well...the movie's violence doesn't justify the overuse of this particular title. I was disturbed by innocent human beings being casually shot in the head during The Pianist...but I wouldn't have thought it appropriate to dream up a title to coincide with the violence.
 
2004-03-05 02:36:46 PM
For the sake of being on-topic:

"Jesus Chainsaw Massacre" refers to the filmmaking approach, not the religion.

Now the real reason I wanted to post:

Triskaidekaacronecroxenobozophobia

Thirteen, heights, death, foreigners, idiots. Cookie?
 
rdr
2004-03-05 02:37:01 PM
And what did Mel do to fan the flames?

Sorry, Cru, I guess I let too much of my middle-aged cynic out in that statement. I can't believe that a man who has made it to the relative top of the Hollywood heap, and stayed there reasonably well, over twenty-plus years is such a babe-in-the-woods as to *not* have been fully aware that this project would end up being like tossing gasoline into a large fireplace that already had a log or two burning.

A downside to practicing atheism and pragmatism, I suppose...
 
2004-03-05 02:39:50 PM
Jesus Chainsaw Masacre?

Which Christ-killer came up with that?

/fans embers
 
2004-03-05 02:40:51 PM
I still think Jesus should not have been a white man in the movie.

If Jesus had been cast as someone closer to his actual ethnicity, I think I may have actually respected the project.
 
2004-03-05 02:43:26 PM
Folks, everytime I see an even moderately incendiary headline, whether it be about religion, politics or whatever, my first thought is, "hmm...poster must be trying to see if he can get a reaction out of the masses." Be damned if it doesn't work every time. Why do you keep taking the bait?
 
2004-03-05 02:45:26 PM
MajorRoss
But who would go to see the movie if it starred some Yassir Arafat look-a-like as Jesus. Clearly there are business requirements that must be met before Gospel accuracy.
 
2004-03-05 02:45:47 PM
helper_monkey:

Because some of us thrive on religious and political flamewars. I personally love them. I'm not being baited, it's what I have a fark account for.
 
2004-03-05 02:46:25 PM
Gospel accuracy.

Oxymoron.
 
2004-03-05 02:48:46 PM
I'm offended that people are offended by the headline. Me being offended only shows the kind of offence people can take by other people saying they are offended when others are offended - and that sir, i find highly offensive.
 
2004-03-05 02:49:35 PM
Insulting other peoples beliefs or culture for your own personal amusement = Ignorant Bigotry
 
2004-03-05 02:50:45 PM
People who don't understand stereotypical humor without malice = whiney asshats.
 
2004-03-05 02:51:09 PM
OsirisOTheDead
A good point. I should have said "... business requirements that must be met before being faithful to the novel"
 
2004-03-05 02:52:22 PM
GreekFool
You have not established why it can't be "Learned Bigotry".
 
2004-03-05 02:53:05 PM
Boobies?

/Boobies
 
RDS
2004-03-05 02:53:37 PM
It's okay...Christianity seems to be the last religion you can openly bash without having an anti-defamation suit slapped on you or being labelled a bigot.

Biggotry comes in a lot of forms ladies and gents.
 
2004-03-05 02:54:03 PM
Mirror anyone? Getting a good 350 bytes/sec
 
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