This guy's smurfed.

Hmm.. does the Chewbacca defense have a new rival?

Hmm.. does the Chewbacca defense have a new rival?

If the smurf talks sh-t, you must acquit.

I did a GIS for "evil smurf" as in the purple Ganap! Ganap! episode but got this instead:



WTF!

"so then she started smurfin me in the parkin lot"
"no smurfin way!"

anyway, this guy is pure gold in the courtroom

though i do find it kinda farked that he never fired a shot yet is getting those 5 charges as first degree.

ummmm oookay!

I knew them smurfs were bad a influence...Just imagine what the Telatubies generations going to be like...The world is coming to an end!

a4dzac,
"Ganap! Ganap!"

Damn straight! Glad somebody else remembers that.

Wait..

I thought the only thing armed robbers want is cash. Everything was supposed to be okay and insurance would replace the lost cash.

/starts pouring gasoline

It is my opinion that any criminal who commits a crime immediately after hitting the LSD or Crystal Meth and whose defense later on is "I don't know" or "I don't remember" should be sentenced to having a hole drilled in their skull and having Muratic acid piped in until they do remember. If they die in the process, then they are cremated and the family is notified that they died in a fiery wreck while recieving gratification from a male in the passenger's seat. That would be a great deterrent.

That cry of "Ganap Ganap!" made me pee a little with fear.

IS IT A NEWS AGENCY OR IS IT A SHORT STORY WEBSITE!?!!

Why the hell do reporters feel the urge to turn news into something that resembles fiction?!?!?! It's cool when they pull it off, but so many of them are such farking terrible writers that it just ruins the story completely.

Morons.

lol King of Toast

not a farkin bad idea at all

"Sandoval gave a two-hour deposition late Monday in the murder trial of his half-brother, Gargamel Rodriguez."

Well, there you go.

These are the survivors. It really was a smurf.

"It is my opinion that any criminal who commits a crime immediately after hitting the LSD or Crystal Meth and whose defense later on is "I don't know" or "I don't remember" should be sentenced to having a hole drilled in their skull and having Muratic acid piped in until they do remember. If they die in the process, then they are cremated and the family is notified that they died in a fiery wreck while recieving gratification from a male in the passenger's seat. That would be a great deterrent."

They're going to think about this before they drop the acid, or after?

Back when I was an acid takin' youngun all I ever got to see was some lousy tracers and stuff. No smurf, no carebears, nuthin'. I feel cheated.

You never took enough. 2000 mics would be cartoon world for most folks.

perisoft: they would think about it before. That way, the info is lodged in their reptilian cortex, and will stay there no matter how high Lucy makes them soar. This will ensure that acid is all they do, and not crimes. It's a flawless plan!

That was no smurf, that was a leprechaun!

GIS for "ganap":

Leprechaun to Ralph Wiggum: You've done grand laddy! Now you know what you have to do! Burn the house down! BURN 'EM ALL!

Smurffette was a loose little biatch!

/I'll go back to my box/cubicle

GIS for "purple smurf"

Damn smurfs will get to you every time.

CougarJeff I'd smurf fark it!

stick-er-n-liquor: Are you sure that's not the Blue Man Group talking to a smurf?

How do we confirm smurfs are asexual?

Look closely. No camel toes or bulgy bits. Going to use some mental floss now...

You couldn't find it because it's gnapp, not ganap.

One mans Smurf is another mans Freedom fighter

What the heck is "gnapp", anyway?

VideoVader

Some insect bit a smurf, he turned purple and mean, and he bit other smurfs in the tail or sumthin' and it spread. Once they turned "evil", they would hop around and say "Gnapp Gnapp".

I remmeber that episode.

I thought he was saying 'g'nat'

It was a rather disturbing episode.. i rather thought it was about AIDS since the virus from the gnap bug could only be transmitted via salavia and bloog.

BTW, since the smurfs were french, does gnap mean anything in french?

Best story in weeks....

2004-02-25 02:34:45 PM mryoop789


"Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That's what's so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What's the point of living if you don't have a dick?"
********************
My GF loves the farking things and if I remember correctly there is a "female" smurf, Smurfette. All the other smurfs went gaga over her when she first showed up. Either it was the long blonde hair (becasue they were all gay and were facinated by it and wanted to style it) or they males reacting to girl for the first time. Take your pick.

It wasnt me talking crap to that psycho. Dude just crazy. Need to lock him the Smurf up before he kills someone.

I think my image of the smurfs was slightly scarred after the SNL TV funhouse episode where smurfette was Anna Nicole. Search Kazaa, damn funny.

The King of Toast

Muratic Acid you say? Nitrates or more poisonous..how about nitric acid?

:-p

Dammit, Clockwork Smurf was the only robot I remember. Then when that one meddling bastard smurf pulled out his innards and then rammed them unceremoniously back into his carcass, he went berserk and painted a line across everything in the smurf town.

As I recall, there were a large number of knockout drops on the show too. That one where they drugged the smurf who built the rocket in hopes of getting to another planet, and then colored themselves green and said they were "Wooks" or something, and he awoke from his slumber and sustained extensive mental trauma. Poor confused, conflicted 80's kids...on the one hand we had Nancy Reagan, the War on Drugs, D.A.R.E., and after-school specials, and on the other we had the Smurfs and Rainbow Brite (R.B. was a vintage China White hallucination; there can be no mistake about that). No wonder we all grew into sarcastic, embittered individuals.


/Just looked over what I wrote, and didn't realize I had such strong feelings about the Smurfs. There really was no reason to write a thesis.

"Nitrates or more poisonous.."

More poisonous, but are they more corrosive? I was going for the corrosion on that one.

I for one welcome our new Smurf Overlords

If smurfs are asexual, where did the baby smurfs come from?

Nitric acid and muratic acid (hydrochloric acid) are both Strong acids, meaning they both ionize 100%

It's been awhile, but wasn't Smurfette a robot created by Gargamel?

I hate myself because I know this.

Smurfette was a kind of golem, magically created using blue clay so that she could infiltrate the smurfs and use her feminine wiles to bring about their destruction (which doesn't make any sense, since sex appeal should be completely useless against sexless smurfs). However, the pure goodness of the smurfs (yeesh, I'm gagging just typing this) made her change from evil to good. When she transformed into a good person, her dark hair turned blonde, which apparently means that blonde women are morally superior to brunettes.

Speaking as someone who got undiluted hydrochloric acid in his eye once ... it hurts.

//freak accident (accident that happened to a freak)