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(Short List)   Actors who only made movies because of contractual obligations because why else would you make Theodore Rex   (shortlist.com) divider line 31
    More: Interesting, The Italian Job, Edward Norton, humans, Gulliver's Travels, Mike Myers, Keanu Reeves, The Devil Wears, Emily Blunt  
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6556 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 03 Sep 2014 at 11:10 AM (3 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-09-03 08:07:13 AM
Who doesn't love alternate history?

38.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-09-03 11:06:16 AM

upload.wikimedia.org


I was sure Natalie Portman would be on that list, maybe more than once. She was a real drag on the last Thor movie and not so great in the first-- Kat Dennings' supporting character in both movies were about a million times more fun and interesting, and I doubt it was all because of the script.

Yet she is considered a "Good" A-list actress somehow, so I was just thinking she was only in those flicks because the lawyers made her, so she just blandly went through the motions.

That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though. Ugh. Her completely wooden style was almost as annoying as JarJar Binks and was a MAJOR reason the movies fell so far short of fan's hopes. At the time I chalked it up to inexperience, or maybe Lucas was screwing things up by making her to deliver her lines like that.

I just don't get it, though to be fair I don't recall seeing her in other movies. Are there other movies where she shows more energy and screen presence than a dead fish?

Also, I just want to point out I'm not a hater, despite the fact her acting (or lack of acting) did real damage to a few movies I was greatly looking forward to. I think Portman is pretty (though living in a university town I see women who are 10x hotter every day) and until shown credible evidence otherwise I believe she's a very nice person in general.
 
2014-09-03 11:17:39 AM

Riche: That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though.


Do I have to say it, or will someone else?
 
2014-09-03 11:24:20 AM
ecx.images-amazon.com

At first I thought there was some ugly story behind an upcoming film adaptation I wasn't aware of.

"Oh right, Whoopi and that dinosaur movie."
 
2014-09-03 11:25:27 AM

KipKips: Riche: That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though.

Do I have to say it, or will someone else?


I wasn't sure if that was massive editing fail given the nature of the rest of the post or some kind of joke I'm not paying enough attention to get (Farking while bored during a staff meeting at work, yay laptops).
 
2014-09-03 11:26:07 AM
fanart.tv
 
2014-09-03 11:29:50 AM
scrapetv.com

"You pilot a cargo plane?"
"No, I ride in one."
 
2014-09-03 11:36:26 AM

Crotchrocket Slim: KipKips: Riche: That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though.

Do I have to say it, or will someone else?

I wasn't sure if that was massive editing fail given the nature of the rest of the post or some kind of joke I'm not paying enough attention to get (Farking while bored during a staff meeting at work, yay laptops).


I WA taking it as aneeded auto correct... otherwise that loooong post was a truly subtle troll...
 
2014-09-03 11:37:53 AM
Wow, my auto correct failed me as well!
 
2014-09-03 11:40:21 AM
Poor Val:

www.joeydevilla.com
 
2014-09-03 11:41:32 AM
Riche:
I just don't get it, though to be fair I don't recall seeing her in other movies. Are there other movies where she shows more energy and screen presence than a dead fish?

You've not seen Leon?
 
2014-09-03 11:42:51 AM
Who the fark greenlit this film??? What, just because Jurassic Park made money?

The imdb summary. I would put this in 48 font if I could, as a warning to generations to come.


In an alternate futuristic society, a tough female police detective is paired with a talking dinosaur to find the killer of dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals leading them to a mad scientist bent on creating a new Armageddon.
 
2014-09-03 11:52:37 AM

Dull Cow Eyes: Who the fark greenlit this film??? What, just because Jurassic Park made money?

The imdb summary. I would put this in 48 font if I could, as a warning to generations to come.


In an alternate futuristic society, a tough female police detective is paired with a talking dinosaur to find the killer of dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals leading them to a mad scientist bent on creating a new Armageddon.


I do love it when the summary of a bad movie makes the movie look even stupider. Really shows how many bad decisions went into the thing.
 
2014-09-03 11:54:45 AM

KipKips: Riche: That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though.

Do I have to say it, or will someone else?


Awww, shiat.

bottomlineideas.files.wordpress.com

I know better.  Really I do.
 
2014-09-03 11:59:03 AM

Riche: KipKips: Riche: That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though.

Do I have to say it, or will someone else?

Awww, shiat.

[bottomlineideas.files.wordpress.com image 400x235]

I know better.  Really I do.


So that was NOT auto correct?

Trolltastic mistake!
 
2014-09-03 12:00:47 PM

Sgt Otter: [ecx.images-amazon.com image 225x346]

At first I thought there was some ugly story behind an upcoming film adaptation I wasn't aware of.

"Oh right, Whoopi and that dinosaur movie."


Same here. I was momentarily super excited for a movie about Roosevelt. Remember that time he put the Swiss ambassador in a headlock? Good times.
 
2014-09-03 12:43:17 PM

Marquis de Sod: Riche:
I just don't get it, though to be fair I don't recall seeing her in other movies. Are there other movies where she shows more energy and screen presence than a dead fish?

You've not seen Leon?


She's only 12 Dude. 12.
 
2014-09-03 04:52:36 PM

Riche: [upload.wikimedia.org image 369x472]
I was sure Natalie Portman would be on that list, maybe more than once. She was a real drag on the last Thor movie and not so great in the first-- Kat Dennings' supporting character in both movies were about a million times more fun and interesting, and I doubt it was all because of the script.

Yet she is considered a "Good" A-list actress somehow, so I was just thinking she was only in those flicks because the lawyers made her, so she just blandly went through the motions.

That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though. Ugh. Her completely wooden style was almost as annoying as JarJar Binks and was a MAJOR reason the movies fell so far short of fan's hopes. At the time I chalked it up to inexperience, or maybe Lucas was screwing things up by making her to deliver her lines like that.

I just don't get it, though to be fair I don't recall seeing her in other movies. Are there other movies where she shows more energy and screen presence than a dead fish?

Also, I just want to point out I'm not a hater, despite the fact her acting (or lack of acting) did real damage to a few movies I was greatly looking forward to. I think Portman is pretty (though living in a university town I see women who are 10x hotter every day) and until shown credible evidence otherwise I believe she's a very nice person in general.


I'm going to ignore the fact that you called it Star Trek since I'm assuming that's a typo.  However, my understanding was that she actually was trying to get out of the Star Wars prequels after the first one.  She wanted to go to college, had been accepted to Harvard, and had no interest in being in the rest of the movies.  Unfortunately she was already contractually obligated to finish the series so she couldn't get out of them and instead provided one of the worst performances ever seen in a major motion AAA movie.

I will disagree with you on the hot thing though.  I think she's one of the most gorgeous women alive, but that's just a personal opinion.
 
2014-09-03 05:44:48 PM
Michael Caine on Jaws: The Revenge:
"I have never seen it, but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific."
 
2014-09-03 05:53:18 PM
Back in the post-Austin Powers haze when Mike Myers was still seen as a bankable box office presence, he was offered $20 million to play his SNL character Dieter on the big screen. But when the script came in, Myers wasn't happy and refused to go forward as he felt that moviegoers would be cheated.

TFA fails to mention that MYERS ACTUALLY CO-WROTE THE FUQKING SCRIPT.

/"You couldn't pay me enough to act in this turkey - and I wrote it!"

//Oh, and CitH Producer Brian Grazer denied that Myers was cast as a settlement for cancelling "Dieter"
 
2014-09-03 06:40:39 PM

PillsHere: Riche: [upload.wikimedia.org image 369x472]
I was sure Natalie Portman would be on that list, maybe more than once. She was a real drag on the last Thor movie and not so great in the first-- Kat Dennings' supporting character in both movies were about a million times more fun and interesting, and I doubt it was all because of the script.

Yet she is considered a "Good" A-list actress somehow, so I was just thinking she was only in those flicks because the lawyers made her, so she just blandly went through the motions.

That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though. Ugh. Her completely wooden style was almost as annoying as JarJar Binks and was a MAJOR reason the movies fell so far short of fan's hopes. At the time I chalked it up to inexperience, or maybe Lucas was screwing things up by making her to deliver her lines like that.

I just don't get it, though to be fair I don't recall seeing her in other movies. Are there other movies where she shows more energy and screen presence than a dead fish?

Also, I just want to point out I'm not a hater, despite the fact her acting (or lack of acting) did real damage to a few movies I was greatly looking forward to. I think Portman is pretty (though living in a university town I see women who are 10x hotter every day) and until shown credible evidence otherwise I believe she's a very nice person in general.

I'm going to ignore the fact that you called it Star Trek since I'm assuming that's a typo.  However, my understanding was that she actually was trying to get out of the Star Wars prequels after the first one.  She wanted to go to college, had been accepted to Harvard, and had no interest in being in the rest of the movies.  Unfortunately she was already contractually obligated to finish the series so she couldn't get out of them and instead provided one of the worst performances ever seen in a major motion AAA movie.

I will disagree with you on the hot thing though.  I think she's one of the most gorgeous women ...


That most of the actors in the prequels are either phoning it in or just rubbish tells you more about the directing and writing than the acting.

Portman has shown she is a great actress but was as wooden as Keanu Reeves, McGregor is again a great actor and even he can't make the dialogue sound good and the rest of the cast are the same.

It just felt like the prequels were 90% their but just missed the mark. Give the dialogue a bit of a polish, tone down Binks and give all the Gunguns less of a silly accent, add in a director or assistant director that can deal with actors and lengthen Anakin's fall and they would be truley great films.
 
2014-09-03 07:15:18 PM
In case you wonder why movie stars don't just quit, Kim Basigner was sued into bankruptcy for pulling out of "Boxing Helena."

It's a movie about a mad surgeon who stalks a woman, cuts off her arms and legs so she can't escape, and keeps her in a box, waiting for her to fall in love with him.
 
2014-09-03 08:00:22 PM

mcreadyblue: energy and screen presence


She had it. 12 or not
 
2014-09-03 08:10:02 PM

Sgt Otter: In case you wonder why movie stars don't just quit, Kim Basigner was sued into bankruptcy for pulling out of "Boxing Helena."

It's a movie about a mad surgeon who stalks a woman, cuts off her arms and legs so she can't escape, and keeps her in a box, waiting for her to fall in love with him.


I'd heard of this movie, but didn't know anything about it and now I have to watch it.  Holy crap that's messed up.  I like weird/bad farked up movies.  I even enjoyed "I Know Who Killed Me."
 
2014-09-03 09:25:50 PM

puckrock2000: Back in the post-Austin Powers haze when Mike Myers was still seen as a bankable box office presence, he was offered $20 million to play his SNL character Dieter on the big screen. But when the script came in, Myers wasn't happy and refused to go forward as he felt that moviegoers would be cheated.

TFA fails to mention that MYERS ACTUALLY CO-WROTE THE FUQKING SCRIPT.

/"You couldn't pay me enough to act in this turkey - and I wrote it!"

//Oh, and CitH Producer Brian Grazer denied that Myers was cast as a settlement for cancelling "Dieter"


Yeah, a lot of these are stretching the truth. It's easier to save face that way.
 
2014-09-03 09:54:46 PM
From the Edward Norton entry

The film, however, remains a surprisingly effective remake

No it doesn't.  It was a farking car commercial masquerading as a shiatty remake.
 
2014-09-03 10:48:35 PM

Sgt Otter: In case you wonder why movie stars don't just quit, Kim Basigner was sued into bankruptcy for pulling out of "Boxing Helena."

It's a movie about a mad surgeon who stalks a woman, cuts off her arms and legs so she can't escape, and keeps her in a box, waiting for her to fall in love with him.


How do you pronounce her name?
 
2014-09-03 11:42:06 PM

Riche: KipKips: Riche: That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though.

Do I have to say it, or will someone else?

Awww, shiat.

[bottomlineideas.files.wordpress.com image 400x235]

I know better.  Really I do.


If you FARK don't drink and if you drink don't FARK.
 
2014-09-04 12:41:49 AM

impaler: Dull Cow Eyes: Who the fark greenlit this film??? What, just because Jurassic Park made money?

The imdb summary. I would put this in 48 font if I could, as a warning to generations to come.


In an alternate futuristic society, a tough female police detective is paired with a talking dinosaur to find the killer of dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals leading them to a mad scientist bent on creating a new Armageddon.

I do love it when the summary of a bad movie makes the movie look even stupider. Really shows how many bad decisions went into the thing.


Stuff like that is probably why we can't have new ideas anymore.
 
2014-09-04 04:57:42 AM

Riche: [upload.wikimedia.org image 369x472]
I was sure Natalie Portman would be on that list, maybe more than once. She was a real drag on the last Thor movie and not so great in the first-- Kat Dennings' supporting character in both movies were about a million times more fun and interesting, and I doubt it was all because of the script.

Yet she is considered a "Good" A-list actress somehow, so I was just thinking she was only in those flicks because the lawyers made her, so she just blandly went through the motions.

That wouldn't explain the Star Trek prequels, though. Ugh. Her completely wooden style was almost as annoying as JarJar Binks and was a MAJOR reason the movies fell so far short of fan's hopes. At the time I chalked it up to inexperience, or maybe Lucas was screwing things up by making her to deliver her lines like that.

I just don't get it, though to be fair I don't recall seeing her in other movies. Are there other movies where she shows more energy and screen presence than a dead fish?

Also, I just want to point out I'm not a hater, despite the fact her acting (or lack of acting) did real damage to a few movies I was greatly looking forward to. I think Portman is pretty (though living in a university town I see women who are 10x hotter every day) and until shown credible evidence otherwise I believe she's a very nice person in general.


I thought she did pretty good in "V for Vendetta"
 
2014-09-04 01:06:29 PM
Sgt Otter In case you wonder why movie stars don't just quit, Kim Basigner was sued into bankruptcy for pulling out of "Boxing Helena."
It's a movie about a mad surgeon who stalks a woman, cuts off her arms and legs so she can't escape, and keeps her in a box, waiting for her to fall in love with him.

my buddy's CSB: I'd heard Whoopi told anybody who'd listen on the "Theodore Rex" set it was crap & she was only doing it so she wouldn't wind up like Basinger...the "Boxing Helena" case jacked up Basuinger's development of Braselton, GA completely
 
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