Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(USA Today)   You know, Putin, I doubt STALIN ever had to issue a press release the day after delivering one of HIS threats, saying that even if he did say what he was reported to say it was "taken out of context." I'm just sayin'   (usatoday.com) divider line 82
    More: Followup, President Vladimir Putin, Kremlins, Kiev, Manuel Barroso, Organization for Security, EU Commission, Cooperation in Europe, Itar-Tass  
•       •       •

3237 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Sep 2014 at 2:14 PM (42 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



82 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-09-02 01:00:54 PM  
I doubt Stalin ever stated his soldiers were on vacation either.
 
2014-09-02 02:16:47 PM  
Checkmate, NATO.
 
2014-09-02 02:18:57 PM  
Stalin never made threats; Stalin delivered on promises.
 
2014-09-02 02:19:38 PM  
Maybe he's just. . . . . stallin' for time

media.twirlit.com
 
2014-09-02 02:20:06 PM  

Prey4reign: Stalin never made threats; Stalin delivered on promises.


He counted the votes, too.
 
2014-09-02 02:20:33 PM  

Prey4reign: Stalin never made threats; Stalin delivered on promises.


Stalin didn't feel any need to talk to his enemies. They were just erased.
 
2014-09-02 02:21:39 PM  
Barroso:  Hello my Putin, what are you wearing?
Putin:  Silly question Barro, I am shirtless and wearing the skin of a freshly slaughtered goat as a kilt
B:  I can take no more of this teasing!
P:  I can be in Kiev in two weeks be patient my love
 
2014-09-02 02:22:04 PM  
FTA:In Moscow, Russia's Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov on Tuesday urged the United States to use its influence in Ukraine to encourage efforts to reach a political settlement. "It's necessary to restrain the party of war in Kiev, and only the United States can do it," he said at a briefing.

Only the US? I was told the US needed to back off it's world police schtick.
 
2014-09-02 02:22:15 PM  
The EU Commission president! How many divisions has he got?
 
2014-09-02 02:22:38 PM  
We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.
 
2014-09-02 02:23:58 PM  
What Soviet/Russian leader prior to Putin ever bothered with threats? I assumed they just did whatever they wanted.
 
2014-09-02 02:24:32 PM  
I think the entire phone call will be featured on a next new episode of Crank Yankers....with Special Ed talking with Putin.

Ed: I like to make poo-snowballs and throw them at Russian people YAAAAAAAAYYY!

Putin: I will kill you just like I kill moose and squirrel
 
2014-09-02 02:26:37 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.


You wanna know why the Ukrainian army went from "inept" to "steadily advancing with tactical discipline" in a matter of weeks?   I personally suspect it's because there are a whole lot of new officers and Advisers with the Ukrainian Army, and all of them just happen to have last names that end in  "-ski"


Polan has already seen this movie once or twice, and they never like the ending.      and Poland provides a convenient cut -out between the west and Ukraine
 
2014-09-02 02:26:57 PM  
Another victory by The Shirtless Chessmaster.  While Fartbozo says stuff like "um" and "duh", this Slavic Adonis crafts memos as carefully constructed as the handiwork that went into constructing the rippling pectoral muscles of this man's man.

How I'd like for him to be our president or perhaps for just a casual one-nighter all to myself.

Checkmate, Obozo.
Bingo, Fartbonger.
Yahtzee, 0bummer.
 
2014-09-02 02:27:57 PM  
Yeah, but Stalin was Georgian.
 
2014-09-02 02:29:36 PM  

Nightsweat: Yeah, but Stalin was Georgian.


Does he chant?
 
2014-09-02 02:32:38 PM  
" this quote was taken out of context and had a very different meaning."

He meant 'take Kiev'... out to a ball game, or to the park, somewhere nice. They could talk; have some dinner, and then maybe a nice walk down the banks of the Dnieper.
 
2014-09-02 02:33:02 PM  

Rapmaster2000: Another victory by The Shirtless Chessmaster.  While Fartbozo says stuff like "um" and "duh", this Slavic Adonis crafts memos as carefully constructed as the handiwork that went into constructing the rippling pectoral muscles of this man's man.

How I'd like for him to be our president or perhaps for just a casual one-nighter all to myself.

Checkmate, Obozo.
Bingo, Fartbonger.
Yahtzee, 0bummer.


Your biting satire creates an excellent straw man. Have at him and don't hold anything back. We're counting on you. Do it for your country.
 
2014-09-02 02:35:09 PM  
anneladyem.files.wordpress.com

Stalin was known to revise press releases.
 
2014-09-02 02:36:07 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.


"NATO Weighs Rapid Response Force for Eastern Europe"
 
2014-09-02 02:37:00 PM  

Abuse Liability: Rapmaster2000: Another victory by The Shirtless Chessmaster.  While Fartbozo says stuff like "um" and "duh", this Slavic Adonis crafts memos as carefully constructed as the handiwork that went into constructing the rippling pectoral muscles of this man's man.

How I'd like for him to be our president or perhaps for just a casual one-nighter all to myself.

Checkmate, Obozo.
Bingo, Fartbonger.
Yahtzee, 0bummer.

Your biting satire creates an excellent straw man. Have at him and don't hold anything back. We're counting on you. Do it for your country.


Hey - didn't I go to med school with you?
 
2014-09-02 02:37:13 PM  

Abuse Liability: FTA:In Moscow, Russia's Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov on Tuesday urged the United States to use its influence in Ukraine to encourage efforts to reach a political settlement. "It's necessary to restrain the party of war in Kiev, and only the United States can do it," he said at a briefing.

Only the US? I was told the US needed to back off it's world police schtick.


It's part of the Russian narrative; see, Ukraine didn't kick out the last guy because he was a corrupt shiat embezzling billions and blatantly taking bribes from Russia.  No no, it was because of American agents wanting to install a Nazi worshiping regime!
 
2014-09-02 02:37:45 PM  

This text is now purple: [anneladyem.files.wordpress.com image 373x500]

Stalin was known to revise press releases.


i.onfinite.com
 
2014-09-02 02:38:25 PM  
I'll bet he's getting tired of that...

"Vlad, you may be the hotshot evil dictator now, but you're no Stalin."
 
2014-09-02 02:38:42 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.


Shouldn't Europe do something then? Why would we have to do anything?
 
2014-09-02 02:39:28 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.


Pretty sure that historians give Chamberlain more praise these days since it's been determined that he was basically stalling for time while England prepared for war.
 
2014-09-02 02:40:27 PM  

This text is now purple: [anneladyem.files.wordpress.com image 373x500]

Stalin was known to revise press releases.


That looks shopped.  I can tell by the pixels photo grain...
 
2014-09-02 02:41:50 PM  

fireclown: Maybe he's just. . . . . stallin' for time

[media.twirlit.com image 296x170]


Lenin diplomacy takes time
 
2014-09-02 02:41:51 PM  

Hector Remarkable: " this quote was taken out of context and had a very different meaning."

He meant 'take Kiev'... out to a ball game, or to the park, somewhere nice. They could talk; have some dinner, and then maybe a nice walk down the banks of the Dnieper.


Or perhaps he meant he'd take Kiev hard in the night with the ferocity of a shirtless stallion rippling with the muscles of a Siberian lumberjack but the gentleness of fresh fallen snow from the heart of Moscow during winter.
 
2014-09-02 02:44:19 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.


This is quite possibly the stupidest thing ever posted on the Internets.
 
2014-09-02 02:44:49 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.


Some interesting revisionist history you've got here.

Chamberlain's appeasement had nothing to do with the war, which was inevitable long before Hitler issued his demands regarding the Sudetenland. There was literally nothing the British and the French could have done in the late 1930s to prevent it; the best they could hope for was to forestall the inevitable long enough to mobilize their own militaries.

I also find it very interesting that your proposed idea to avoid "fighting later" is to fight now.
 
2014-09-02 02:46:33 PM  

karnal: Abuse Liability: Rapmaster2000: Another victory by The Shirtless Chessmaster.  While Fartbozo says stuff like "um" and "duh", this Slavic Adonis crafts memos as carefully constructed as the handiwork that went into constructing the rippling pectoral muscles of this man's man.

How I'd like for him to be our president or perhaps for just a casual one-nighter all to myself.

Checkmate, Obozo.
Bingo, Fartbonger.
Yahtzee, 0bummer.

Your biting satire creates an excellent straw man. Have at him and don't hold anything back. We're counting on you. Do it for your country.

Hey - didn't I go to med school with you?


I took medical pharmacology/ physiology with the med students to get my PhD. Also, my brother is a resident in general surgery. Probably thinking of him.
 
2014-09-02 02:51:03 PM  
Stalin didn't have to put up with the liberal mainstream MSM media.

Just saying'.
 
2014-09-02 02:52:24 PM  

Prey4reign: Stalin never made threats; Stalin delivered on promises.


Tito called him out though. Then made a better vodka.
 
2014-09-02 02:54:37 PM  
Never fear...Obama is sure to issue a press release or give a stirring speech on this matter shortly.
 
2014-09-02 02:54:46 PM  
The Larch:  liberal mainstream MSM media.


oi61.tinypic.com
 
2014-09-02 02:56:18 PM  

CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.


That's completely not what Chamberlain did. Hitler went into the Rhineland in 1936, and Britain said, "Eh, France, it's IN Germany, you want to fight them, you're on your own." Hitler went into Austria in 1938, and everyone said, "Eh, who cares, they're all Krauts, anyway." Hitler threatened to invade Czechoslovakia later in 1938, and Britain said, "Ah, crap, we are COMPLETELY unprepared to stop this because we failed to build up our air force in response to Germany's buildup. Well, nothing we can do but give in; after all, the Sudetenland is all Krauts, too. But this, and no farther." Hitler went into Poland in 1939, and Britain and France declared war. The FIRST "Don't cross this line" was Poland, and they backed their commitment. The failure was not in diplomacy, it was in military preparedness; failing to respond to Germany's military buildup.

Situation today would be as if Hitler had a MUCH smaller, less capable military than the equivalent of Britain and France in 1938. So, not similar at all. Also, we've done what we said we would do if he crossed the lines he's crossed, which is hit Russia with ever-growing sanctions. NATO was never intended to be an expeditionary force to protect Russia's non-aligned neighbors, although it looks like they're moving in that direction.
 
2014-09-02 03:00:13 PM  
Stalin had thousands of men as "military advisors" in the Spanish Civil War, where Hitler had his own "volunteer" army. Of course, both of these groups were manning heavy tanks, artillery pieces, and modern warplanes that they took with them. They were fighting each other directly but officially they were not at war. The grand daddy of covert warfare was probably Mao, who had one million men fighting as volunteers in the Korean war against the US, without war declared between the two parties.

I could also mention numerous military interventions by the US in the name of fighting terrorism.

Putin is only doing what others had already done many times in modern history.
 
2014-09-02 03:01:21 PM  

LazyMedia: That's completely not what Chamberlain did. Hitler went into the Rhineland in 1936, and Britain said, "Eh, France, it's IN Germany, you want to fight them, you're on your own." Hitler went into Austria in 1938, and everyone said, "Eh, who cares, they're all Krauts, anyway." Hitler threatened to invade Czechoslovakia later in 1938, and Britain said, "Ah, crap, we are COMPLETELY unprepared to stop this because we failed to build up our air force in response to Germany's buildup. Well, nothing we can do but give in; after all, the Sudetenland is all Krauts, too. But this, and no farther." Hitler went into Poland in 1939, and Britain and France declared war. The FIRST "Don't cross this line" was Poland, and they backed their commitment. The failure was not in diplomacy, it was in military preparedness; failing to respond to Germany's military buildup.

Situation today would be as if Hitler had a MUCH smaller, less capable military than the equivalent of Britain and France in 1938. So, not similar at all. Also, we've done what we said we would do if he crossed the lines he's crossed, which is hit Russia with ever-growing sanctions. NATO was never intended to be an expeditionary force to protect Russia's non-aligned neighbors, although it looks like they're moving in that direction.


There's also the argument that the British military was WAY behind the times.  Army, Navy, Air Force, all branches.  A lot of people forget that Chamberlain was responsible for a massive modernization program of the British armed forces; it's not that he really thought Hitler could be "appeased," he just didn't think he had the military to back things up.
 
2014-09-02 03:04:39 PM  
FTFA: In Moscow, Russia's Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov on Tuesday urged the United States to use its influence in Ukraine to encourage efforts to reach a political settlement. "It's necessary to restrain the party of war in Kiev, and only the United States can do it," he said at a briefing.

Lavrov also said that "compromise" is the only way to resolve the crisis and accused the West of supporting Kiev and undermining the peace process.


Translation:
We screwed this up. We are in too deep with no way out. Please, please, please come up with something to save us before Putin is driven from the Kremlin like a plagued rat.

Sadly, for the Russians, there isn't anything NATO or the West or the USA can do. This is a war between Ukraine and Russia now. They will be fighting all winter long.
 
2014-09-02 03:06:25 PM  

p the boiler: CleanAndPure: We need troops in Eastern Europe pronto to call his bluff.

Chamberlain played the pacifist to Hitler and kept saying.

"Don't cross this line... oh you did... but don't cross this line"

He kept giving in to Hitler until it made war inevitable.


We need to stop a future disasterous war now by sending troops before this escalates and Russia takes half of Europe again whilst Obama says:

"Don't cross this line"


We've got to be strong now so we don't have to fight later.

Shouldn't Europe do something then? Why would we have to do anything?


We would be NATO in this case not just the US.


So yes... the US and a few token European troops.
 
2014-09-02 03:08:36 PM  
lolwut?  I didn't understand the headline.  Let me see if the article makes more sense.

Nope - it doesn't.

Putin's still an asshole though.  I'm pretty sure I've got that much right.
 
2014-09-02 03:18:05 PM  
So what is this guy's deal?
 
2014-09-02 03:21:05 PM  
Oh come on pooty poot the western press would never misquote you, lie us into war sure, but not misquote you. /s
 
2014-09-02 03:24:02 PM  

Satanic_Hamster: LazyMedia: That's completely not what Chamberlain did. Hitler went into the Rhineland in 1936, and Britain said, "Eh, France, it's IN Germany, you want to fight them, you're on your own." Hitler went into Austria in 1938, and everyone said, "Eh, who cares, they're all Krauts, anyway." Hitler threatened to invade Czechoslovakia later in 1938, and Britain said, "Ah, crap, we are COMPLETELY unprepared to stop this because we failed to build up our air force in response to Germany's buildup. Well, nothing we can do but give in; after all, the Sudetenland is all Krauts, too. But this, and no farther." Hitler went into Poland in 1939, and Britain and France declared war. The FIRST "Don't cross this line" was Poland, and they backed their commitment. The failure was not in diplomacy, it was in military preparedness; failing to respond to Germany's military buildup.

Situation today would be as if Hitler had a MUCH smaller, less capable military than the equivalent of Britain and France in 1938. So, not similar at all. Also, we've done what we said we would do if he crossed the lines he's crossed, which is hit Russia with ever-growing sanctions. NATO was never intended to be an expeditionary force to protect Russia's non-aligned neighbors, although it looks like they're moving in that direction.

There's also the argument that the British military was WAY behind the times.  Army, Navy, Air Force, all branches.  A lot of people forget that Chamberlain was responsible for a massive modernization program of the British armed forces; it's not that he really thought Hitler could be "appeased," he just didn't think he had the military to back things up.


Churchill was supportive of Chamberlain's diplomacy; he didn't think it was feasible or worth fighting over the Sudetenland, either. Where he differed from the government was in calling for a military buildup in 1934, three years before everyone else realized that was necessary.

This is what's so dumb about making Munich comparisons. The combined military power of NATO is FAR greater than Russia's. Nobody but Jammacain thinks Ukraine is worth fighting Russia over, and that's his response to EVERYTHING.
 
2014-09-02 03:24:29 PM  

Abuse Liability: karnal: Abuse Liability: Rapmaster2000: Another victory by The Shirtless Chessmaster.  While Fartbozo says stuff like "um" and "duh", this Slavic Adonis crafts memos as carefully constructed as the handiwork that went into constructing the rippling pectoral muscles of this man's man.

How I'd like for him to be our president or perhaps for just a casual one-nighter all to myself.

Checkmate, Obozo.
Bingo, Fartbonger.
Yahtzee, 0bummer.

Your biting satire creates an excellent straw man. Have at him and don't hold anything back. We're counting on you. Do it for your country.

Hey - didn't I go to med school with you?

I took medical pharmacology/ physiology with the med students to get my PhD. Also, my brother is a resident in general surgery. Probably thinking of him.


Probably - it was in N.O. years ago
 
2014-09-02 03:32:58 PM  

karnal: Abuse Liability: karnal: Abuse Liability: Rapmaster2000: Another victory by The Shirtless Chessmaster.  While Fartbozo says stuff like "um" and "duh", this Slavic Adonis crafts memos as carefully constructed as the handiwork that went into constructing the rippling pectoral muscles of this man's man.

How I'd like for him to be our president or perhaps for just a casual one-nighter all to myself.

Checkmate, Obozo.
Bingo, Fartbonger.
Yahtzee, 0bummer.

Your biting satire creates an excellent straw man. Have at him and don't hold anything back. We're counting on you. Do it for your country.

Hey - didn't I go to med school with you?

I took medical pharmacology/ physiology with the med students to get my PhD. Also, my brother is a resident in general surgery. Probably thinking of him.

Probably - it was in N.O. years ago


Well I was in graduate school (classes at least) from 2006 - 2008.  My brother was  in LSUHSC classes from 2009 - 2013 I think.   But yeah, we both definitely went to LSU Health Sciences Center in New Orleans.
 
2014-09-02 03:33:23 PM  
i.imgur.com

"Vladimir, your invasion of Ukraine will be gauged along with a rating of one to ten on your style, which will be judged solely by me and my vast expertise of military incursion techniques."
 
2014-09-02 03:44:54 PM  
Russia raised the stakes Tuesday over a disputed phone call between Russian President Vladimir Putin and head of the EU Commission president by threatening to go public with the conversation that the Kremlin said misquoted the Russian leader as saying he could be in Kiev within two weeks if he wanted.


You know, at the InterContinental. The rooms are lovely, and the service is crisp and professional. He recommends it to all of his friends.
 
2014-09-02 03:46:02 PM  

skinink: What Soviet/Russian leader prior to Putin ever bothered with threats? I assumed they just did whatever they wanted.


It's a good thing that this isn't true. 

"We will bury you." -- Nikita Khrushchev
 
Displayed 50 of 82 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report