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(Guardian)   "Anything to declare?" "Si, two bicycles, four tires, and a new motor for my Chevy"   (theguardian.com ) divider line
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3164 clicks; posted to Politics » on 01 Sep 2014 at 3:08 PM (1 year ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



47 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-09-01 01:50:59 PM  
Everything I know about Cuba I learned from Guys and Dolls. Thanks to Zombie Castro outliving and defying 11 presidential administrations, I can no longer just take a date on a bet to a casino in Havana. Because Communists, can't have good things.
 
2014-09-01 02:45:19 PM  
My cousin can get what ever you want.
img.fark.net
 
2014-09-01 03:38:03 PM  
Chebby?
 
2014-09-01 03:38:07 PM  
I'd rather have an embargo on China than Cuba.
 
2014-09-01 03:45:34 PM  
Ah, but China has imports we want.  Cuba has.......Cubans.
 
2014-09-01 03:56:53 PM  
If you're riding in your chevy and you feel something heavy
 
2014-09-01 04:04:58 PM  
"We have nothing to declare!" - "Except a cello! ...ello ...ello"

www.maestronet.com
 
2014-09-01 04:18:03 PM  
And a new hat for Coach Landry.
 
2014-09-01 04:22:11 PM  
FTFA:  Hundreds of thousands of Cubans and Cuban-Americans fly to and from the island each year thanks to the easing of travel restrictions by the US and Cuban governments over the past five years.

Aren't I supposed to be OUTRAGED about this because a tiny minority of people have their panties in a bunch over some things that happened 60 years ago?  THANKS OBCASTRO!
 
2014-09-01 04:35:07 PM  
Apparently, you don't have to declare that you like peanut butter and jelly sammiches.
 
2014-09-01 04:37:25 PM  
Obama should step up to the plate and open talks with Cuba.
 
2014-09-01 04:38:58 PM  

xanadian: FTFA:  Hundreds of thousands of Cubans and Cuban-Americans fly to and from the island each year thanks to the easing of travel restrictions by the US and Cuban governments over the past five years.

Aren't I supposed to be OUTRAGED about this because a tiny minority of people have their panties in a bunch over some things that happened 60 years ago?  THANKS OBCASTRO!


If I remember correctly, part of that reticence was Cuban ex-pats telling us that Castro was trying to infiltrate the US with sleeper cells, or something.
 
2014-09-01 05:04:51 PM  
i.imgur.com

problem solved
 
2014-09-01 05:04:53 PM  
 
2014-09-01 05:08:49 PM  
Dear Cuba:

Will you take back Rafael Eduardo? If you do maybe we can start a petition to lift the embargo completely.

The American Public
 
2014-09-01 05:16:23 PM  
And what happens to the goods that they don't allow into the country? Do they just dump them in the ocean?
 
2014-09-01 05:25:11 PM  

fusillade762: And what happens to the goods that they don't allow into the country? Do they just dump them in the ocean?


Same thing that happens in the US. They become government property and get sold at auction.
 
2014-09-01 05:32:11 PM  

johnphantom: Obama should step up to the plate and open talks with Cuba.


Agreed. The embargo just looks stupider and stupider every year it stays in place.

Is there some sort of unofficial rule here that we all have to wait for Castro to die before that process can begin or what?
 
2014-09-01 06:03:05 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-09-01 06:08:19 PM  

BalugaJoe: And a new hat for Coach Landry.


That always reminds me of the rendition of "Battle of New Orleans" made for the Cowboys-Dolphins Super Bowl.

/yes, it was a parody of a parody
 
2014-09-01 06:33:21 PM  

Rixel: Ah, but China has imports we want.  Cuba has.......Cubans.


What's wrong with rum and cigars? I would mention a third thing but that would violate the new Fark guidelines.
 
2014-09-01 06:38:15 PM  
Cuban chicks?
 
2014-09-01 06:45:22 PM  
Can't have the Cuban people get a taste of material wealth, now.  They might get all sorts of ideas about freedom and human rights, and that would be bad for the wealthy elites who run the country.
 
2014-09-01 07:36:29 PM  

quatchi: johnphantom: Obama should step up to the plate and open talks with Cuba.

Agreed. The embargo just looks stupider and stupider every year it stays in place.

Is there some sort of unofficial rule here that we all have to wait for Castro to die before that process can begin or what?


There is in fact a very official rule that says the US won't deal with Cuba until Feidel AND his brother Raouel are gone.

That's holding a grudge an Irishman would say is a bit much
 
2014-09-01 07:39:52 PM  

nyseattitude: I'd rather have an embargo on China Saudi Arabia than Cuba.


Not disagreeing with your opinion, which I share, but to me this version is even more to the point. Of course, there's no way we would ever do anything to offend the pushers who supply us with all that delicious light, sweet crude.
 
2014-09-01 07:54:16 PM  
How many Obama t-shirts can be brought in at one time?
 
2014-09-01 07:55:57 PM  
www.beamdog.com
 
2014-09-01 08:10:25 PM  

Kevin72: Everything I know about Cuba I learned from Guys and Dolls. Thanks to Zombie Castro outliving and defying 11 presidential administrations, I can no longer just take a date on a bet to a casino in Havana. Because Communists, can't have good things.


Sure you can. Go to Jamaica and find a boat taking European tourists to Cuba. Bribe them with a couple hundred bucks to not stamp your passport on the way in or out, and boom. Have fun on warm sandy beaches without all the annoying American tourists.

/My mom's boyfriend went to the Caribbean with some people who did this for part of the trip
//That was a few years ago, of course
///Tempted to try it if I ever go back to Jamaica
 
2014-09-01 08:56:58 PM  

IamTomJoad: quatchi: johnphantom: Obama should step up to the plate and open talks with Cuba.

Agreed. The embargo just looks stupider and stupider every year it stays in place.

Is there some sort of unofficial rule here that we all have to wait for Castro to die before that process can begin or what?

There is in fact a very official rule that says the US won't deal with Cuba until Feidel AND his brother Raouel are gone.

That's holding a grudge an Irishman would say is a bit much


As long as Florida is a swing state, we will never have relations with Cuba.
 
2014-09-01 09:07:51 PM  

glmorrs1: Kevin72: Everything I know about Cuba I learned from Guys and Dolls. Thanks to Zombie Castro outliving and defying 11 presidential administrations, I can no longer just take a date on a bet to a casino in Havana. Because Communists, can't have good things.

Sure you can. Go to Jamaica and find a boat taking European tourists to Cuba. Bribe them with a couple hundred bucks to not stamp your passport on the way in or out, and boom. Have fun on warm sandy beaches without all the annoying American tourists.

/My mom's boyfriend went to the Caribbean with some people who did this for part of the trip
//That was a few years ago, of course
///Tempted to try it if I ever go back to Jamaica


Or you could just pay $15 for a tourist visa

Buy a direct flight from Montego Bay to Havanna.

No muss no fuss.
 
2014-09-01 10:29:12 PM  

dustman81: IamTomJoad: quatchi: johnphantom: Obama should step up to the plate and open talks with Cuba.

Agreed. The embargo just looks stupider and stupider every year it stays in place.

Is there some sort of unofficial rule here that we all have to wait for Castro to die before that process can begin or what?

There is in fact a very official rule that says the US won't deal with Cuba until Feidel AND his brother Raouel are gone.

That's holding a grudge an Irishman would say is a bit much

As long as Florida is a swing state, we will never have relations with Cuba.


Phrasing!
 
2014-09-01 11:35:15 PM  

xanadian: FTFA:  Hundreds of thousands of Cubans and Cuban-Americans fly to and from the island each year thanks to the easing of travel restrictions by the US and Cuban governments over the past five years.

Aren't I supposed to be OUTRAGED about this because a tiny minority of people have their panties in a bunch over some things that happened 60 years ago?  THANKS OBCASTRO!


No we should be overjoyed that relaxing restrictions on Cuba are normalizing relations and leading to greater freedom there, as these new regs are illustrating.
 
2014-09-01 11:40:09 PM  

State_College_Arsonist: Can't have the Cuban people get a taste of material wealth, now.  They might get all sorts of ideas about freedom and human rights, and that would be bad for the wealthy elites who run the country.


As I was reading the story, I was wondering what shows a Cuban has to watch on his big flat screen? I assume theyre importing DVDs as well, cuz I can't imagine the Cuban government producing anything better than hagiographic documentaries on the Castro brothers.
 
2014-09-01 11:55:04 PM  

jjorsett: State_College_Arsonist: Can't have the Cuban people get a taste of material wealth, now.  They might get all sorts of ideas about freedom and human rights, and that would be bad for the wealthy elites who run the country.

As I was reading the story, I was wondering what shows a Cuban has to watch on his big flat screen? I assume theyre importing DVDs as well, cuz I can't imagine the Cuban government producing anything better than hagiographic documentaries on the Castro brothers.


Actually, they have non-political programming, like soap operas, nature documentaries, arts and humanities, and a shiat-ton of imported programming from the USA, Central and South America, and Europe. Limited channel options, but it is essentially Cuban Fox (cable, not Fox News), Cuban ABC, Cuban NPR, Cuban other NPR, and Cuban Telemundo.
 
2014-09-02 12:29:04 AM  

dustman81: IamTomJoad: quatchi: johnphantom: Obama should step up to the plate and open talks with Cuba.

Agreed. The embargo just looks stupider and stupider every year it stays in place.

Is there some sort of unofficial rule here that we all have to wait for Castro to die before that process can begin or what?

There is in fact a very official rule that says the US won't deal with Cuba until Feidel AND his brother Raouel are gone.

That's holding a grudge an Irishman would say is a bit much

As long as Florida is a swing state, we will never have relations with Cuba.


That can be arranged...

gifs.gifbin.com
 
2014-09-02 12:33:43 AM  

dustman81: As long as Florida is a swing state, we will never have relations with Cuba.


In fairness, Cuba could do a bit more to assist rectifying the issue. Yes?
I love to blame FL for just about anything I can, but on this issue, there is more to the story.
 
2014-09-02 01:12:36 AM  

Madame Ovary: Good read.  http://www.amazon.com/Havana-Nocturne-Owned-Cuba-Revolution/dp/006171 2 744/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1409605430&sr=1-4&keywords=havana


I suppose the Mob thought they could get something back from Cuba if they helped Castro with his little problem in Dallas. That is, if you believe the Mob helped with that little problem in Dallas.

I read The Deserters. It tells the story of Allied deserters in WWII Europe and Africa. It's amazing how much the Mob influenced the Italian campaigns.

Then there was the story that a Mob employee was a pilot for one of the Allied bigwigs in supply for Normandy. The pilot shot his commanding officer in the head, landed the plane in France and took off for Italy to run the blackmarket on the docks.

Weird stuff.
 
2014-09-02 01:47:14 AM  

Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: Madame Ovary: Good read.  http://www.amazon.com/Havana-Nocturne-Owned-Cuba-Revolution/dp/006171 2 744/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1409605430&sr=1-4&keywords=havana
I suppose the Mob thought they could get something back from Cuba if they helped Castro with his little problem in Dallas. That is, if you believe the Mob helped with that little problem in Dallas.
I read The Deserters. It tells the story of Allied deserters in WWII Europe and Africa. It's amazing how much the Mob influenced the Italian campaigns.
Then there was the story that a Mob employee was a pilot for one of the Allied bigwigs in supply for Normandy. The pilot shot his commanding officer in the head, landed the plane in France and took off for Italy to run the blackmarket on the docks.
Weird stuff.



The operative phrase being "Then there was the story.........."

No really big deal, but our world has just become such a haven of people who are so inclined to say "this is what the XXYYZZZ" does not want you to know (and so many turn out to be quacks), I just shut down with unproven stories of conspiracy.

Yes, I am sure it happened to some or whatever degree. However, I also think there are a bunch of huckters out there peddling the story using the "one that got away" meme to sell more books, audio tapes and maps that lead to nowhere.
 
2014-09-02 02:12:14 AM  

homelessdude: [i.imgur.com image 248x138]

problem solved


A Walmart in Havana?  That would finish off Cuban industry in a few years.
 
2014-09-02 02:19:49 AM  

Alphax: homelessdude: [i.imgur.com image 248x138]

problem solved

A Walmart in Havana?  That would finish off Cuban industry in a few years.


Yeah but everybody would WORK there.
 
2014-09-02 02:24:57 AM  

whidbey: Alphax: homelessdude: [i.imgur.com image 248x138]

problem solved

A Walmart in Havana?  That would finish off Cuban industry in a few years.

Yeah but everybody would WORK there.


The Cuban government would have to set up Soviet style bread lines to feed them lunch.
 
2014-09-02 02:27:50 AM  

Alphax: whidbey: Alphax: homelessdude: [i.imgur.com image 248x138]

problem solved

A Walmart in Havana?  That would finish off Cuban industry in a few years.

Yeah but everybody would WORK there.

The Cuban government would have to set up Soviet style bread lines to feed them lunch.


Let them eat cheeseballs.

goodteethbadteeth.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-09-02 03:05:42 AM  

whidbey: Let them eat cheeseballs.

[goodteethbadteeth.files.wordpress.com image 275x300]


Utz brand cheese balls? There's a  My Cousin Vinny joke in there somewhere, but I'm too exhausted to go looking for it.
 
2014-09-02 03:08:51 AM  

jjorsett: State_College_Arsonist: Can't have the Cuban people get a taste of material wealth, now.  They might get all sorts of ideas about freedom and human rights, and that would be bad for the wealthy elites who run the country.

As I was reading the story, I was wondering what shows a Cuban has to watch on his big flat screen?


"I Love Lucy" reruns?
 
2014-09-02 03:17:06 AM  

fusillade762: jjorsett: State_College_Arsonist: Can't have the Cuban people get a taste of material wealth, now.  They might get all sorts of ideas about freedom and human rights, and that would be bad for the wealthy elites who run the country.

As I was reading the story, I was wondering what shows a Cuban has to watch on his big flat screen?

"I Love Lucy" reruns?


According to the Wiki, Cubans get a variety of locally produced news and information programs, locally produced educational channels, and locally produced telenovelas and similar entertainment programming. a channel that features a variety of international programs (programming from the National Geographic Channel, for instance), and a channel which features current American entertainment programming and sports.
 
2014-09-02 09:59:59 AM  
 
2014-09-02 04:15:00 PM  
With all of the free trade I keep hearing about, I'm surprised they can't just order through Amazon.
 
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