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(NJ.com)   Man using chainsaw in tree falls 30 feet, sticks the landing on a metal fence post   (nj.com ) divider line
    More: Sad  
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4858 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Aug 2014 at 8:20 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



44 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-08-26 12:08:09 AM  
That is a badass way to die
 
2014-08-26 12:11:24 AM  
I'd post the Cannibal Holocaust nsfw pic, but I'm still on the fence about it.
 
2014-08-26 12:13:03 AM  
The Vlad, never use the Vlad.
 
2014-08-26 12:17:09 AM  
When Wojtach arrived, he found Cross impaled on a 1.5 inch upright galvanized metal chain link fence post, Wilsusen said.

Fence was designed to keep out....NOTHING!
 
2014-08-26 12:26:50 AM  

mikaloyd: That is a badass way to die


It impales by comparison
 
2014-08-26 02:28:10 AM  
They always told us that those who remain on the fence are bound to be impaled by it.  It seems he took that lesson to heart.  No doubt at a high rate of speed.
 
2014-08-26 04:20:59 AM  
Shame this article wasn't from the New York Post.
 
2014-08-26 08:21:42 AM  
Jesus, Cross was impaled.
 
2014-08-26 08:23:04 AM  

I_Am_Weasel: Jesus, Cross was impaled.


Came to see this stuck up on the page.
 
2014-08-26 08:23:56 AM  

Kuroboom: Shame this article wasn't from the New York Post.


His last words were...
*dons shades*
"Last post:
 
2014-08-26 08:29:18 AM  
Did he forget the cardinal rule of standing between the chainsaw and the tree trunk?
 
2014-08-26 08:29:36 AM  
Robert FrostOwnd
 
2014-08-26 08:30:07 AM  
www.avsforum.com
 
2014-08-26 08:31:20 AM  

Archie Goodwin: Did he forget the cardinal rule of standing between the chainsaw and the tree trunk?


Maybe he never studied law.
 
2014-08-26 08:39:25 AM  
It had to be an elaborate suicide designed too look like an accident.  No one is dumb/crazy enough to stand in a tree 30' up with a running chainsaw without a safety harness.
 
2014-08-26 08:39:40 AM  
Farking safety harnesses. How do they work?
 
2014-08-26 08:44:00 AM  
This makes me wish that '1000 Ways To Die' was still around. This and many other articles on here would be another 5 seasons worth of material.
 
2014-08-26 08:44:39 AM  

abhorrent1: Farking safety harnesses. How do they work?


I'm going to go out on a limb and say he would have probably hung himself instead if he was using one.
 
2014-08-26 08:45:15 AM  
no need to even climb the tree at all, you can rent a cherry picker for like 80-100 bucks a day.
 
2014-08-26 08:51:57 AM  

Raider_dad: Archie Goodwin: Did he forget the cardinal rule of standing between the chainsaw and the tree trunk?

Maybe he never studied law.


He couldn't pass the bar...

/I'm here all week
//Try the veal
 
2014-08-26 08:52:24 AM  

berylman: It had to be an elaborate suicide designed too look like an accident.  No one is dumb/crazy enough to stand in a tree 30' up with a running chainsaw without a safety harness.


Bets?  I was actually looking for two other videos I couldn't find: there are a lot of even stupider things than this.
 
2014-08-26 08:54:09 AM  

kling_klang_bed: This makes me wish that '1000 Ways To Die' was still around. This and many other articles on here would be another 5 seasons worth of material.


Dear god, the one with the at-home liposuction using a shopvac freaked me out for some reason.
 
2014-08-26 08:54:17 AM  

berylman: It had to be an elaborate suicide designed too look like an accident.  No one is dumb/crazy enough to stand in a tree 30' up with a running chainsaw without a safety harness.


Head on over to livelink and there's plenty of footage to prove that wrong.
 
2014-08-26 08:59:01 AM  

Headso: no need to even climb the tree at all, you can rent a cherry picker for like 80-100 bucks a day.


Yeah but this way, you save the $80, spend $20 on a case of Schlitz, and make an afternoon out if it! You're already ahead $60! Now hold my beer and watch this...
 
2014-08-26 09:02:13 AM  

rebelyell2006: kling_klang_bed: This makes me wish that '1000 Ways To Die' was still around. This and many other articles on here would be another 5 seasons worth of material.

Dear god, the one with the at-home liposuction using a shopvac freaked me out for some reason.


It tickled me to no end!!!! "GET IT OUT, YOU IDIOT!!!!!!"
 
2014-08-26 09:06:12 AM  
Why Sad tag?  This sounds more like a story custom made for the Dumbass tag.

Sears would like everyone to know the chainsaw survived the fall and is operable.  Widow will either post it for sale on ebay or bury it with Cross in the casket.
 
2014-08-26 09:07:16 AM  
I saw a case once:  The guy was drinking on a second floor deck at a house warming party.  This being a new house, there were freshly planted trees and shrubs in the yard. Just off the deck was a new tree held upright by several metal fence posts strategically staked around it.  For some reason, the guy jumped off the deck.  He landed arse first on a fence post.  It impaled him and the exit was through his abdomen.  His drunk buddies did the right thing and  pulled the post out of the ground and not out of the poor bastard that had acquired it.  It took a bit of surgery to repair the guy but he was eventually OK.
 
2014-08-26 09:27:19 AM  

pissnmoan: I saw a case once:  The guy was drinking on a second floor deck at a house warming party.  This being a new house, there were freshly planted trees and shrubs in the yard. Just off the deck was a new tree held upright by several metal fence posts strategically staked around it.  For some reason, the guy jumped off the deck.  He landed arse first on a fence post.  It impaled him and the exit was through his abdomen.  His drunk buddies did the right thing and  pulled the post out of the ground and not out of the poor bastard that had acquired it.  It took a bit of surgery to repair the guy but he was eventually OK.


Jebus H. Christ.  That had to have hurt.  I don't think there's been an unguent developed which would help with that level of butt hurt.
 
2014-08-26 10:00:39 AM  
I can only presume that this is why the guys one pays to remove or prune trees typically wear harnesses and such as.
 
2014-08-26 10:22:00 AM  
Whenever I climb something, which is less and less as I get older, I always look around for things that could hurt me if I fell on them. If I can move them or move to another area I do that. I also make a mental note of which direction would be the best to fall. A man has to know his options.
 
2014-08-26 10:30:41 AM  
Getting a kick out of this story. I'm a trained chainsaw operator, I get additional training every year in order to keep up my certification. Climbing a tree with a chainsaw is actually an additional certification on top of a general chainsaw one. Homeowner chainsaw accidents are so common there should be ban on sales.
 
2014-08-26 10:34:31 AM  
Thirty feet up with a chainsaw and no safety equipment?  Darwin must have been salivating.
 
2014-08-26 10:36:46 AM  
media2.giphy.com
 
2014-08-26 10:37:58 AM  
Introducing: The Babyrack 3000
blog.brotherhoodinstructors.com

For all your baby storage needs
 
2014-08-26 10:38:56 AM  
sprott.physics.wisc.edu
 
2014-08-26 11:07:34 AM  
Useless without pics?
 
2014-08-26 11:12:19 AM  
This is why I don't do any of this stupid manual labor shiat. Fark than noise. I'll let the dumb-ass contractors risk their lives. Climbing trees with a chainsaw in hand is a job for someone with a double-digit I.Q. and a beer can collection.
 
2014-08-26 12:03:05 PM  

WilderKWight: This is why I don't do any of this stupid manual labor shiat. Fark than noise. I'll let the dumb-ass contractors risk their lives. Climbing trees with a chainsaw in hand is a job for someone with a double-digit I.Q. and a beer can collection.


I'm an engineer with a pretty good IQ and I enjoy working outdoors and building stuff as a hobby. It's a lot more fun than sitting in front of this computer all day. I cut down this sweetgum tree in my back yard by limbing it out first then bringing it down in sections. In this picture I was about 35 feet up but I was using a summit viper climbing stand and a safety harness.
img.fark.net
 
2014-08-26 12:19:31 PM  

qualtrough: Whenever I climb something, which is less and less as I get older


This.

I had a wooden ladder break on me a few years ago. I was only 6 feet up, but it caught me under the ribs pretty hard.
Anything taller than that, I'd just as soon pay someone to do it.
 
2014-08-26 03:57:21 PM  
Tree cutting or trimming services is extremely expensive. I can see why a lot of home owners choose the DIY route.
I just had a medium size tree taken down and the company charged me $800! and that's the lower bid one.

If I'm any poorer than I already am I may have been very tempted to do it myself.
 
2014-08-26 04:12:26 PM  
andycoughlin.co.uk
 
2014-08-26 07:09:45 PM  

SuperNinjaToad: Tree cutting or trimming services is extremely expensive. I can see why a lot of home owners choose the DIY route.
I just had a medium size tree taken down and the company charged me $800! and that's the lower bid one.

If I'm any poorer than I already am I may have been very tempted to do it myself.


Hospital bills, crushed houses, and funerals are pretty pricey, too.
 
2014-08-26 07:19:49 PM  

WilderKWight: This is why I don't do any of this stupid manual labor shiat. Fark than noise. I'll let the dumb-ass contractors risk their lives. Climbing trees with a chainsaw in hand is a job for someone with a double-digit I.Q. and a beer can collection.


So other than moving money in and out of your bank account, you're pretty useless.
 
2014-08-27 02:18:08 AM  
img.fark.netWell I do this stuff for a living so I'll try and rummage through my two-syllable vocabulary before I go and sort my beer can collection. Most accidents of this sort entail the victim standing on a ladder and cutting a large chunk of tree off whereupon they are suddenly not standing on a ladder any more but hurtling towards terra firma with a chainsaw and a rapidly emptying bladder. This was a 140ft Douglas Fir. The reason it's expensive to have done is because it's not very forgiving...... if you must do it yourself tie the ladder, yourself and the chainsaw to the tree, preferably below the part you are cutting off.
 
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