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(The New York Times)   Now the gov't wants your car to text with other cars... this should end well. Subby can't wait to hack it   (nytimes.com) divider line 142
    More: Dumbass, Car Talk, connected car, National Highway Traffic Safety Administration  
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3460 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Aug 2014 at 10:41 AM (14 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



142 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-08-21 07:25:32 AM  
Text your speed to that cop sitting at the side of the road?
 
2014-08-21 07:43:40 AM  
Maybe I can get mine to make JT-65 contacts for me.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-08-21 08:17:41 AM  
Going 999 mph. Driver refuses to steer. Get out of way.
 
2014-08-21 08:45:28 AM  
SEND TAILPIPE PIX, PLS!
 
2014-08-21 08:46:13 AM  
Making it so cars do things they shouldn't would be a con text, subby.
 
2014-08-21 08:47:54 AM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: SEND TAILPIPE PIX, PLS!


HIE?

/Headlights in e-mail
 
2014-08-21 08:55:35 AM  
"The reason you almost hit me was because you were in the wrong turning lane."
 
2014-08-21 08:59:06 AM  
"Honk all you want, we're only moving up 25 feet to sit a little closer to this red light."
 
2014-08-21 09:00:55 AM  
"Oncoming traffic is just going to keep turning left in front of you unless you actually start moving forward."
 
2014-08-21 09:01:30 AM  
"Sorry to cut you off, I was distracted by that booty on the side of the road."
 
2014-08-21 09:02:05 AM  
"It's OK, It must really be hard to be in a rush all the time."
 
2014-08-21 09:02:43 AM  
"You have an ugly car. And face."
 
2014-08-21 09:03:26 AM  
"Working brake lights would be nice."
 
2014-08-21 09:04:25 AM  
"I'm more important than you. Also I don't actually do any useful work for a living."
 
2014-08-21 09:05:03 AM  
"WATCH OUT FOR THAT --- well, never mind."
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-08-21 09:40:21 AM  
SRY I CRSHED U LOL
 
2014-08-21 09:41:28 AM  
"What you don't see is the Glock sitting on my passenger seat."
 
2014-08-21 09:48:54 AM  
i131.photobucket.com
 
2014-08-21 10:43:01 AM  
I'm thinking about getting a CB so I can talk with other car beds.
 
2014-08-21 10:43:22 AM  
rlv.zcache.com
 
2014-08-21 10:43:24 AM  
I'm loving how the government wants to track cars but pays no farking attention that hackers can and would do worse if they hack the gov'ts servers.

Assholes.
 
2014-08-21 10:44:12 AM  
basemetal

Text your speed to that cop sitting at the side of the road?


And when you don't completely stop, ect.. you know for $aftey.
 
2014-08-21 10:47:24 AM  
Trolltastic headline, subby. Why don't you get right on that, after you finish hacking the air-traffic control and train-routing systems? Oh, and police dispatch; don't forget to knock out the e-911 system while you're at it.

//I have some experience with watching people try to link mobile computer systems together in a network. Apparently, it's HARD.
 
2014-08-21 10:48:07 AM  
Transmitters in the vehicles send and receive information 10 times a second: speed, direction, location and other data that automakers and federal regulators hope will usher in a new era of road safety.surveillance.
 
2014-08-21 10:48:45 AM  
George Carlin brought this up a generation ago. He should get royalties.

/oh..
 
2014-08-21 10:48:47 AM  
I for one welcome our brave new world where critical thinking, motor skills and spatial perception are totally teh oldz0rs and unnecessary.
 
2014-08-21 10:50:01 AM  
Yea, yea, yea.

ETC was going to kill us all. Electronic steering was going to kill us all. OBD-II computers were going to kill us all. Infotainment was going to kill us all.

I don't see why you guys are so worried about car-to-car communications. All the other technical advances of the last forty years already killed us all.
 
2014-08-21 10:51:15 AM  
So if I'm stuck in traffic, can I send the hot chick next to me some penis pics? Like chatroulette  for cars? That would be cool.
 
2014-08-21 10:52:00 AM  

NutWrench: Transmitters in the vehicles send and receive information 10 times a second: speed, direction, location and other data that automakers and federal regulators hope will usher in a new era of road safety.surveillance.


And people wonder why I drive an older vehicle.
 
2014-08-21 10:52:40 AM  

skozlaw: ETC was going to kill us all. Electronic steering was going to kill us all. OBD-II computers were going to kill us all. Infotainment was going to kill us all.


I must not have bought a newspaper that week.
 
2014-08-21 10:56:01 AM  
Keep making cars more and more expensive,  so I keep buying more and more used cars that pollute.
 
2014-08-21 10:56:28 AM  
"Hnk Hnk in way lol kk ttyl"
 
2014-08-21 10:58:38 AM  
RTTY, the original text message!
 
2014-08-21 10:59:17 AM  
So there I was. I buy this new ride with a car-to-car communication system. Little did I know my Chevy was going to fall for a Chrysler and leave me stranded. The last thing OnStar could tell me is they were heading toward the Canadian border.
 
2014-08-21 11:00:36 AM  
I can has Fark Traffic Forum?
 
2014-08-21 11:00:51 AM  
what sending a sexy topless pict might look like...

www.carspeed-78.com
 
2014-08-21 11:01:42 AM  
I don't know why the scientists make them.
 
2014-08-21 11:02:02 AM  
This "car mesh" is scary.

It might make sense but it is a slippery slope. You do this first, then you add in communication back to a central point for "traffic performance purposes" and collect data.

The government subpoenas the data, like car black box data, to track the driver in a case or over time on a special case.

Soon, it is "Let's just collect and keep the data" long term to speed the subpoena process.

The cities who are in a budget crunch add in some geolocation and sensors along some of the roads and you are emailed your traffic citation for speeding, failure to come to a complete stop, etc.

Yea, no thanks.
 
2014-08-21 11:04:01 AM  
"Hey baby, wanna fark?"
 
2014-08-21 11:05:16 AM  

ChipNASA: [rlv.zcache.com image 512x512]


I have impossibly tight deadlines to meet because everyone thinks manufacturing works like email, you just press a button and it's done, so  excuse me if I'm constantly in a huge god damn hurry!

/sorry, it's one of those kind of days.
 
2014-08-21 11:07:08 AM  
So road rage isn't bad enough with simple horn blowing and hand gestures.  Now they want actual specific text sent.  Even though reading that text while driving is incredibly distracting.

How exactly is that supposed to make anything any safer at all?

For the record, I have the same contention with billboards.  Especially the ones that say things like, "If you're reading this, you are not paying attention to the road."

//Really?!
 
2014-08-21 11:08:42 AM  
Nice tires, wanna fark?
 
2014-08-21 11:09:06 AM  
It's too bad no one should trust the government anymore. It takes all the "wondrous future" thrill off of ideas like this. They always abuse every single supposedly good thing, from CIA vaccination campaigns to tracking your every move with cell phones. The world would be so much cooler if we could just use things without having to worry about how the government is going to try to fark you with it.
 
2014-08-21 11:09:57 AM  

basemetal: Text your speed to that cop sitting at the side of the road?


They won't do that.  Pulling over a speeding driver still costs money.  They can maximize $afety by transmitting your speed to computerized receivers that just mail you a ticket without any human intervention.

* Tickets may be contested within 30 days in-person on the 5th Tuesday of every month between the hours of 2 and 3 in the 3rd sub-basement of the capitol building.  To contest your ticket you must bring a cashiers check or money order in the amount of the ticket as a non-refundable appearance fee.  If you are unsuccessful, the ticket must be paid in-person, on the 5th Tuesday of the month, same place, same time, within 30 days, or your license and registration will be suspended.
 
2014-08-21 11:12:26 AM  
skozlaw: Yea, yea, yea.

ETC was going to kill us all. Electronic steering was going to kill us all. OBD-II computers were going to kill us all. Infotainment was going to kill us all.

I don't see why you guys are so worried about car-to-car communications
government. All the other technicalcorporation advances of the last forty years already killed us all.


"At a government-sponsored pilot program ... and a consortium of eight automakers ..."

Ya'll blame the puppet for everything. (Pay no attention to those eight corporations behind the curtain.)


"The current pattern suggests much lobbying is done by corporations, although a wide variety of coalitions representing diverse groups is possible." Wiki

Possible? Hahahahahahahahahahahaha. Hahahahaha. Haha.
 
2014-08-21 11:14:39 AM  
This really puts a new meaning to "ass or gas nobody rides for free"
 
2014-08-21 11:14:57 AM  
Ya, this whole thing scares the bejeebus outta me.

/1984
 
2014-08-21 11:16:21 AM  
This is better for everybody.  If you actually have to drive the car, how can you watch ads?
 
2014-08-21 11:16:29 AM  
My car will be sending sexts to sports cars and getting turned down.
 
2014-08-21 11:17:18 AM  
Give me a car that can sense when I'm hungry and orders me a pizza right in time to be delivered right as I'm pulling in the drive way.
 
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