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(Capital OTC)   The FDA wants you to know that the bottles of EbolaBlaster, HemorrhageAway and ViroNuke you've been buying are probably, just maybe, not legit or effective   ( capitalotc.com) divider line
    More: Obvious  
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934 clicks; posted to Geek » on 18 Aug 2014 at 2:03 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



48 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-08-18 12:09:04 PM  
Apply directly to forehead
 
2014-08-18 12:11:52 PM  
What Ebo-B-Gone? Asking for a friend.
 
2014-08-18 12:13:32 PM  

img.fark.net


"Could I perhaps interest you in some


forsythia, then?"

 
2014-08-18 01:35:41 PM  
As long as I have my trusty bottle of Phalanx, I know I'll be safe.
 
2014-08-18 01:38:21 PM  
Homeopathy and quack remedies are such bullshiat. That's why I never see a quarantined patient without my copper health bracelet, my deep earth quartz amulet and of course my personal immune booster fragrance created for me by my aromatherapist
 
2014-08-18 02:10:48 PM  
Laugh all you want, but my bottle of Ebola-B-Gone has a 100% effective rate of protecting me against Ebola.  It's science, biatches.
 
2014-08-18 02:12:22 PM  
People who market fake treatments should be sent to jail for a long, long time. No one will go to jail who have tried to fraudulently capitalize on the fear from this outbreak, but they should - big time.
 
2014-08-18 02:14:46 PM  
Sales of Phalanx however are still going strong
 
2014-08-18 02:15:04 PM  

Diogenes: [img.fark.net image 259x194]
"Could I perhaps interest you in some
forsythia, then?"


Came for Contagion, leaving satisfied.
 
2014-08-18 02:19:11 PM  
c1.staticflickr.com
 
2014-08-18 02:20:41 PM  

mongbiohazard: People who market fake treatments should be sent to jail for a long, long time. No one will go to jail who have tried to fraudulently capitalize on the fear from this outbreak, but they should - big time.


It's a great idea, but most of these quacks learned a long time ago that politicians are easy marks and provide incredible protection. Many US states allow naturopaths/homeopaths/etc. to operate so long as they don't attempt to practice real medicine (such as giving IV injections, offering anything a doctor has to maintain a license to prescribe, etc.) Regulation like that ostensibly keeps these nutjobs from doing anything too dangerous, but the legitimacy they obtain from being "state licensed" is an incredible setback.
 
2014-08-18 02:22:19 PM  
It burns when you drink it. That's how you know it's working!
 
2014-08-18 02:27:21 PM  

hstein3: mongbiohazard: People who market fake treatments should be sent to jail for a long, long time. No one will go to jail who have tried to fraudulently capitalize on the fear from this outbreak, but they should - big time.

It's a great idea, but most of these quacks learned a long time ago that politicians are easy marks and provide incredible protection. Many US states allow naturopaths/homeopaths/etc. to operate so long as they don't attempt to practice real medicine (such as giving IV injections, offering anything a doctor has to maintain a license to prescribe, etc.) Regulation like that ostensibly keeps these nutjobs from doing anything too dangerous, but the legitimacy they obtain from being "state licensed" is an incredible setback.


Yeah, I know. That's why I forlornly admitted no one would go to jail over this. It sucks, but that's what the corrupting influence of money in our politics gets us...

But they absolutely SHOULD be going to jail. We should bury people like this under the farking jail.
 
2014-08-18 02:32:23 PM  
My god people will buy into anything.  I for one would never buy into any of these drugs because unlike those rubes I know that my copper and magnet braclets protect me and that my custom insoles will wick away any of the germs that get past the braclets
 
2014-08-18 02:44:01 PM  

mongbiohazard: People who market fake treatments should be sent to jail for a long, long time. No one will go to jail who have tried to fraudulently capitalize on the fear from this outbreak, but they should - big time.


Why do you hate capitalism? Are you some kind of pinkocialist?
 
2014-08-18 02:46:03 PM  
I don't get the FDA and their weasel tacit approval of supplements. If it goes in your mouth and it's not a food, not a drug, not a drink and not a dildo, what the fark is it? Oh it's a supplement. fark you. That's a food. Regulate it.
 
2014-08-18 03:04:40 PM  

moothemagiccow: I don't get the FDA and their weasel tacit approval of supplements. If it goes in your mouth and it's not a food, not a drug, not a drink and not a dildo, what the fark is it? Oh it's a supplement. fark you. That's a food. Regulate it.


You talk almost as if you weren't aware that congress has specifically prohibited the FDA from doing such a thing or that the "supplement" industry is one of the biggest donors to Congressional campaigns in the world
 
2014-08-18 03:11:14 PM  

moothemagiccow: I don't get the FDA and their weasel tacit approval of supplements. If it goes in your mouth and it's not a food, not a drug, not a drink and not a dildo, what the fark is it? Oh it's a supplement. fark you. That's a food. Regulate it.


They do, in the sense that your supplement needs to meet the criteria of "food" (like, it can't be 9 parts arsenic to one part cyanide and sold as a supplement); near as I can tell, the only thing that separates "food" from a "supplement" is that the manufacturer is claiming the supplement does something (though I think they're limited either to saying "might alleviate symptoms of X" or other weasel-y phrasing, or that it adds a vitamin or mineral - it "supplements" the diet in some fashion).

Supplements cannot be, by themselves, harmful.

It's also tough to draw that bright line between what is a claim of efficacy and what is a claim of assistance - the difference between "my crystal cures cancer" and "my crystal can have a limited effect on reducing a user's notice of certain pains due to cancer" is clear, but what if we change the former to "my crystal reduces the severity of cancer"? What if we change it to "my crystal CAN cure cancer" - in that case, you're not saying it WILL have an effect, only that it CAN.

What about placebos, where the doc might know, for example, that a 25mg Benadryl won't do anything for the kid's cold, but it shuts mom up real nice, alleviates some symptoms, and the kid's asleep before they get home - granted, Benadryl's not homeopathic and we know damn well how it works, but in terms of claims vs reality it works as an example.

// not apologizing for homeopaths and other scam artists, not even a little, but don't be too quick to dismiss them even as placebo treatments. It's insane how we can trick our brains into healing our bodies
// but from a legal and public health standpoint, what can be done about the bullshiat quackery?
// a small change at the FDA, to prevent linking a foodstuff to a disease (cause or cure) without some medical support, and make that a high-ish bar to clear? Would that be enough?
 
2014-08-18 03:14:02 PM  
Local Winn-Dixie stocks homeopathic 'remedies' in the kids' medicine section. Because who's gonna reach for the cheapest, most promising product on the shelf? A harried, uninformed parent who will then wonder why Timmy's not getting any better and take him to the ER.

It's disgusting.
 
2014-08-18 03:15:20 PM  

moothemagiccow: I don't get the FDA and their weasel tacit approval of supplements. If it goes in your mouth and it's not a food, not a drug, not a drink and not a dildo, what the fark is it?


www.jerkcity.com
 
2014-08-18 03:25:01 PM  
No Flu Buddy?
harymesshumor.files.wordpress.com

/I am dissapoint
 
2014-08-18 03:25:42 PM  
I make sure Sophia Smith was personally involved in making my antivirals so I know I've got the good stuff.  And Faith keeps me from getting too close to any infected.
 
2014-08-18 03:28:16 PM  
img1.wikia.nocookie.net

I thought this episode was a little weak on the skeptical lesson about placebos and making sure your speak out against them when you see them. Or as Nassim Taleb might say "If you see fraud and do not say fraud, you are a fraud".
 
2014-08-18 03:42:49 PM  
HemorrhageAway

You sure will.
 
2014-08-18 03:56:57 PM  

hstein3: mongbiohazard: People who market fake treatments should be sent to jail for a long, long time. No one will go to jail who have tried to fraudulently capitalize on the fear from this outbreak, but they should - big time.

It's a great idea, but most of these quacks learned a long time ago that politicians are easy marks and provide incredible protection. Many US states allow naturopaths/homeopaths/etc. to operate so long as they don't attempt to practice real medicine (such as giving IV injections, offering anything a doctor has to maintain a license to prescribe, etc.) Regulation like that ostensibly keeps these nutjobs from doing anything too dangerous, but the legitimacy they obtain from being "state licensed" is an incredible setback.

Please don't equate homeopathy and naturopathy. Homoepathy is a scam from the ground up. The "theory" behind it is balderdash. Naturopathy, on the other hand, is based on real observable results (enough so that one of the reasons we decry the loss of the rainforests and such is because of the loss of herb and other species that may have considerable and important healing properties), though since it's unregulated it's largely a dangerous scam at present, but if it were brought aboard medical science and regulated as such, it can be quite useful.
 
2014-08-18 04:17:41 PM  

COMALite J: Please don't equate homeopathy and naturopathy. Homoepathy is a scam from the ground up. The "theory" behind it is balderdash. Naturopathy, on the other hand, is based on real observable results (enough so that one of the reasons we decry the loss of the rainforests and such is because of the loss of herb and other species that may have considerable and important healing properties), though since it's unregulated it's largely a dangerous scam at present, but if it were brought aboard medical science and regulated as such, it can be quite useful.


So, I've never heard of naturopathy. I Googled it. Every link on the first page says that they use homeopathy. Which would imply that naturopathy is a scam as well. If you have a link to a naturopathy website that denounces homepathy, I'm sure we'd a ll like to see it.
 
2014-08-18 04:23:48 PM  
img4.wikia.nocookie.net

Take 2 and call me in the morning
 
2014-08-18 04:27:09 PM  
I kind of like EbolAway myself.
 
2014-08-18 04:29:16 PM  
FDA? Pfft. What do they know? This stuff was developed by a teacher!
 
2014-08-18 04:40:04 PM  

hstein3: mongbiohazard: People who market fake treatments should be sent to jail for a long, long time. No one will go to jail who have tried to fraudulently capitalize on the fear from this outbreak, but they should - big time.

It's a great idea, but most of these quacks learned a long time ago that politicians are easy marks and provide incredible protection. Many US states allow naturopaths/homeopaths/etc. to operate so long as they don't attempt to practice real medicine (such as giving IV injections, offering anything a doctor has to maintain a license to prescribe, etc.) Regulation like that ostensibly keeps these nutjobs from doing anything too dangerous, but the legitimacy they obtain from being "state licensed" is an incredible setback.


Try all US states allow homeopathic bullshiat to be marketed as medicine, and it's been that way since the 1930s.

It's high time to update the law to exclude homeopathic magic from being included along with effective medicines.
 
2014-08-18 04:45:41 PM  

technoblogical: COMALite J: Please don't equate homeopathy and naturopathy. Homoepathy is a scam from the ground up. The "theory" behind it is balderdash. Naturopathy, on the other hand, is based on real observable results (enough so that one of the reasons we decry the loss of the rainforests and such is because of the loss of herb and other species that may have considerable and important healing properties), though since it's unregulated it's largely a dangerous scam at present, but if it were brought aboard medical science and regulated as such, it can be quite useful.

So, I've never heard of naturopathy. I Googled it. Every link on the first page says that they use homeopathy. Which would imply that naturopathy is a scam as well. If you have a link to a naturopathy website that denounces homepathy, I'm sure we'd a ll like to see it.


That's because at the moment, naturopaths are on the same level as chiropractors and homeopaths, with some serious crossover among them.  It does include homeopathy as valid treatments for ailments.

This course listing has 4 homeopathy courses as required to graduate.
 
2014-08-18 04:48:07 PM  

COMALite J: Naturopathy, on the other hand, is based on real observable results (enough so that one of the reasons we decry the loss of the rainforests and such is because of the loss of herb and other species that may have considerable and important healing properties), though since it's unregulated it's largely a dangerous scam at present, but if it were brought aboard medical science and regulated as such, it can be quite useful.


a lot if it has been brought aboard medical science and regulated as such

it's called "medical science"
 
2014-08-18 05:06:51 PM  

sprawl15: a lot if it has been brought aboard medical science and regulated as such

it's called "medical science"


For things like willow bark (aspirin), sure - give one patient group in pain aspirin, give another sugar pills, see which group reports less pain after 15, 20, 30 minutes (etc).

What about meditation (can be used in treatment of psychological conditions such as PTSD with preliminarily promising, and limited, results)? How do you test that under the rubric of Western Medicine?

It's really not that simple, though it is that simple to dismiss everything.

// I have a brother who just finished a Masters' in CAM, with a strong focus on placebo
// turns out, placebo both is and is not all in our heads
// also, Western Medicine does things like prescribe psychotropic drugs to millions of patients without really knowing how they work - we know, sort of, THAT they work (ish, once you find the right cocktail and dosages, if the patient doesn't eventually need to rejigger their psychopharmacology), but we have little idea HOW
 
2014-08-18 05:14:53 PM  

Dr Dreidel: What about meditation (can be used in treatment of psychological conditions such as PTSD with preliminarily promising, and limited, results)? How do you test that under the rubric of Western Medicine?


the same way - you compare its effect to nothing, then account for the placebo effect.

the only real issue is that it's considered inhumane to give people fake meditation

and it's not like meditation is within the narrowly defined band of naturopathy used above, which is basically herbalism
 
2014-08-18 05:25:57 PM  
I like to 'meditate' after ingesting 'herbs'

/puff, puff, namaste
 
2014-08-18 05:27:49 PM  

sprawl15: the same way - you compare its effect to nothing, then account for the placebo effect.


Usually, when talking about placebos in tests, there is some administration of something - a saline injection, a sugar pill, a phony manipulation of a joint (for placebo acupuncture - yes that's a thing, used in testing - applying the pin[s] to the "wrong" place is the alteration IIRC) - some positive action meant to mimic the treatment in every way but chemically.

If a patient group is sitting in a quiet room and asked to be contemplative, they're meditating. If not, they're not. It's a binary state that can't really be "placebo'd" the same way a pill treatment can. They're still studying it, and for good reason, but when it comes to "nontraditional" treatments, the old rules may not apply in the same ways they did for "conventional" treatment.

Also, if you can find a way to "account for" the placebo effect - measuring it, knowing how much of it to "control" for, etc - there are potentially billions of pharm industry dollars waiting for you.

// diluting and rediluting is not medicine
// "sacred" herbs and practices might be
// alls I'm saying is that we would do well to adapt these methods to Western-style testing if they can't be directly tested Westernly
 
2014-08-18 05:48:33 PM  

Dr Dreidel: Usually, when talking about placebos in tests, there is some administration of something - a saline injection, a sugar pill, a phony manipulation of a joint (for placebo acupuncture - yes that's a thing, used in testing - applying the pin[s] to the "wrong" place is the alteration IIRC) - some positive action meant to mimic the treatment in every way but chemically.


which is why i mentioned fake meditation. kind of like when penn and teller did the bullshiat episode where they used 'magnet therapy' and made people better with demagnetized pieces of metal. though i don't really know what the hell 'fake meditation' would entail

Dr Dreidel: alls I'm saying is that we would do well to adapt these methods to Western-style testing if they can't be directly tested Westernly


if a system is designed such that it can't be scientifically tested, then it's kind of the system's fault that it can't be scientifically tested. not science's.
 
2014-08-18 06:59:35 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: Sales of Phalanx however are still going strong


Stile4aly: As long as I have my trusty bottle of Phalanx, I know I'll be safe.



Well, thank god this was covered.
 
2014-08-18 07:37:58 PM  

Dr Dreidel: // alls I'm saying is that we would do well to adapt these methods to Western-style testing if they can't be directly tested Westernly


You write as if American doctors would forbid a patient from meditating. Many doctors will include relaxation, exercise (etc.) in their recommendations for wellness. It's just that they won't "prescribe" lifestyle management exclusively, nor will they suggest that yoga and contemplative thought will cure cancer. Big difference.

sprawl15: though i don't really know what the hell 'fake meditation' would entail


I imagine any systemized form of meditation would have certain proscribed methods to it. (Sit like this, say that, do it for X amount of time Y times per day.) "Placebo meditation" would likely be something that was utterly made up, i.e. you ask the patient to sit in a quiet room and think about kittens.

Dr Dreidel: If a patient group is sitting in a quiet room and asked to be contemplative, they're meditating.


Then your description of meditation is so overly broad as to be worthless. If that's all the rigor that is required for something you're getting right into the realm of "non-specific effects."
 
2014-08-18 07:40:01 PM  
www.womansday.com
"Created by a School Teacher"    so it must be legit.
 
2014-08-18 07:41:31 PM  
reneau.smugmug.com
 
2014-08-18 07:46:44 PM  
Rad-x and buffout still ok, tho, right?
 
2014-08-18 10:35:03 PM  

hstein3: I imagine any systemized form of meditation would have certain proscribed methods to it. (Sit like this, say that, do it for X amount of time Y times per day.) "Placebo meditation" would likely be something that was utterly made up, i.e. you ask the patient to sit in a quiet room and think about kittens.


if the benefit is just from being in a quiet room and using concentrated thinking (about kittens or about kundalini), then it'd hit just as much

you could disprove specific types of meditation if they were specific enough in the process i guess but in general? idk
 
2014-08-19 12:57:37 AM  

quantum_jellyroll: [reneau.smugmug.com image 381x600]


Heh, I was going to post "But it must be working, my anus is minty fresh!"
 
2014-08-19 04:29:57 AM  
Names seem to be right out of Fallout.
 
2014-08-19 09:06:56 AM  
you need to directly inject homogenized Australian ghost shark to combat this plague. duh.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_ghostshark
 
2014-08-19 10:25:20 AM  

sprawl15: Dr Dreidel: What about meditation (can be used in treatment of psychological conditions such as PTSD with preliminarily promising, and limited, results)? How do you test that under the rubric of Western Medicine?

the same way - you compare its effect to nothing, then account for the placebo effect.

the only real issue is that it's considered inhumane to give people fake meditation

and it's not like meditation is within the narrowly defined band of naturopathy used above, which is basically herbalism


My herbalism is maxed out, so I switched to mining.

/Someone's gotta make those copper bracelets!
 
2014-08-19 02:36:05 PM  

Brainsick: No Flu Buddy?
[harymesshumor.files.wordpress.com image 271x219]

/I am dissapoint


img.fark.net
 
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