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(Motor Racing Network)   Welcome to Daytona and Talladega... circa 1985. It's the Pure Michigan Speedy Nap 400. Coverage begins at Noon ET on MRN, because FUESPN   (mrn.com) divider line 534
    More: Spiffy  
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391 clicks; posted to Sports » on 17 Aug 2014 at 11:30 AM (9 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-08-16 10:57:21 PM  

Are you not sports entertained?



www.theboobirds.com

After a one week abscence, its time once again for...

Your weekly NASFARK checklist! Ever changing and updated on the fly, just like the NASCAR rulebook.




(Created by  DanZero &   bluorangefyre, with contributions from Professor Farksworth, QueenMamaBee, Mzltplx,and a bunch of other Fark racing fans!)



1) Every 25th post is "DANICA," every 500th post is "CHECKERED FLAG!," hardcore gredunzas count, and every 1,100th post is, "Screw the gredunza, I just did the double!"
2) Something asking "ARE YOU NOT SPORTS ENTERTAINED?" before the 10th post
3) Somebody comes in with a humorous "left/right turn/going in circles" comment
4) BOOGITY in some form when race starts
5) Idols/Buddhas/Transformers/Reactors being fired up
6) Complaints about LOLTNT & FUESPN race coverage (or if in LOLTNT/FUESPN coverage, how bad it is and how we pine for FOX again) ONLY VALID FOR 2014!
7) While we were away!
8) Green flag pit stops
9) The inevitable race commentator foul up
10) Phantom cautions
11) "Austin Dillon driving car number three... the number made famous by the late/great Dale Earnhardt."
12) MLP deployment ONLY in the following instances: sad Rainbow Dash when Princess Crumplefenders (AKA Danica) inevitably wrecks, happy Rainbow Dash if she's running in the top 20, charging Rainbow Dash if she's in the top 10, Nightmare Moon if we need some extra mojo to help the idols and Buddhas defeat car #48
13) Complaints and such if Jimmie Johnson wins again and celebrations from his fan(s)
14) Race is official when Kvapil, Reutimann, Wise, or any BK Racing driver bring out the caution (can be more than one)
15) BONUS OFFICIAL RACE: Mikey brings out the yellow
16) Something to do with potato salad and/or sugar free gummi bears
17) SPECIAL BONUS: One of us is actually at the track
18) Something not meant to catch fire does
19) We are reminded about how a track is famous for The Big One/Darlington Stripe/Eating tires/Fuel Mileage races.
20) "Because #3 car"
21) Race is boring... what are you drinking?
22) "Lord baby Jesus, smite Logano's engine!"
23) Somebody asking why they don't run in the rain followed by a quick explaination why its not a good idea
24) Idol collateral damage warning
25) DanZero's commercial/side-by-side recap from last week and running throughout the thread
26) DamnitLarson!
27) Switch over to MRN, because FUESPN
 
2014-08-16 11:01:48 PM  
NASFARK TWITTER LIST!(Updated 8/10/2014)

bluorangefyre - @bluorangefyre
QueenMamaBee - @KyJockeyLuvr
Mztlplx - @tinfoil_fedora
Professor Farksworth - @DrueBernardi
Foaming - @EvanOlson
Gonz - @Ben_Deckos
radiofreewill - @insert_funny
bionicjoe - @bionicjoe

Follow us and add your name to this list!
 
2014-08-16 11:31:16 PM  
A bit early? What kind of madness is this? Do we really want to have a non-boring race so soon at Mich-again?
 
2014-08-16 11:32:38 PM  
Oh, I thought this was already greened. This will probably be the thread, but I don't think an FU to ESPN will make it so either
 
2014-08-17 12:05:12 AM  
Michigan has gone to ludicrous speed.

I'm okay with this.
 
2014-08-17 12:07:44 AM  
Well shiat. Good job subby.

*note to self, insult ESPN for greens*

/hey, it worked for me and TNT
 
2014-08-17 01:05:41 AM  

Warchild: Michigan has gone to ludicrous speed.

I'm okay with this.


What drivers see out of their windshields at Michigan:
img.fark.net
 
2014-08-17 01:16:52 AM  

DanZero: *note to self, insult ESPN for greens*


Well ESPN insults us with their NASCAR coverage, with the ultimate insult being going straight from Dinger's first Cup victory, two years after being suspended, the mountain he had to climb to get there with a one-car team, the absolute joy he had approaching DW at Daytona levels, the absolute thrill of seeing Brad Daugherty's reaction in the secondary booth (can't think of anything else to call it), and the joyous moment that we absolutely  needed after the Smoke incident, to showing Smoke running over Kevin Ward.  Thankfully, my kids had just left the room before that popped up on screen.  How could I have explained  that to my four-year-old and two-year-old?

I wish NASCAR could terminate ESPN's coverage of NASCAR right now and give it to TNT at this point, and I know we all hate TNT, but even they wouldn't have stooped so low.
 
2014-08-17 07:40:08 AM  

bluorangefyre: DanZero: *note to self, insult ESPN for greens*

Well ESPN insults us with their NASCAR coverage, with the ultimate insult being going straight from Dinger's first Cup victory, two years after being suspended, the mountain he had to climb to get there with a one-car team, the absolute joy he had approaching DW at Daytona levels, the absolute thrill of seeing Brad Daugherty's reaction in the secondary booth (can't think of anything else to call it), and the joyous moment that we absolutely  needed after the Smoke incident, to showing Smoke running over Kevin Ward.  Thankfully, my kids had just left the room before that popped up on screen.  How could I have explained  that to my four-year-old and two-year-old?

I wish NASCAR could terminate ESPN's coverage of NASCAR right now and give it to TNT at this point, and I know we all hate TNT, but even they wouldn't have stooped so low.


Yeah, TNT would have given us another plague boat ad another plague boat ad another plague boat ad.
 
2014-08-17 08:38:19 AM  
Shirtless hottie was killed off of Murder In The First so I'm sure TNT will give us endless ads for it next year. I'm getting sick (heh) of plague boat
 
2014-08-17 08:42:59 AM  

bluorangefyre: DanZero: *note to self, insult ESPN for greens*

Well ESPN insults us with their NASCAR coverage, with the ultimate insult being going straight from Dinger's first Cup victory, two years after being suspended, the mountain he had to climb to get there with a one-car team, the absolute joy he had approaching DW at Daytona levels, the absolute thrill of seeing Brad Daugherty's reaction in the secondary booth (can't think of anything else to call it), and the joyous moment that we absolutely  needed after the Smoke incident, to showing Smoke running over Kevin Ward.  Thankfully, my kids had just left the room before that popped up on screen.  How could I have explained  that to my four-year-old and two-year-old?

I wish NASCAR could terminate ESPN's coverage of NASCAR right now and give it to TNT at this point, and I know we all hate TNT, but even they wouldn't have stooped so low.


I still think ESPN owes a public apology to Kevin Ward's family, friends, Tony Stewart, and all the viewers watching Sunday's race for showing that footage and that story immediately after one of the best feel good moments of the year. But we won't ever get one "BECUZ WE R JURNULISTS!"
 
2014-08-17 11:42:53 AM  
Let's go, Smoke Jeff Burton!

Hope Smoke gets back to racing soon. Fark the haters.
 
2014-08-17 11:56:23 AM  
Winner Winner chicken dinner!
  * I told you! *
 
2014-08-17 11:57:11 AM  
Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.
 
2014-08-17 11:57:20 AM  

Rattlehead: Let's go, Smoke Jeff Burton!

Hope Smoke gets back to racing soon. Fark the haters.


I have no problem with him returning. Ward's death was about 85% his fault and about 15% Stewart's for being an a**hole driver.
 
2014-08-17 11:57:25 AM  
Yay another race I get to miss because work! :D

Since I'm not watching, watch it become a crashfest of epic proportions.

As long as JJ is in one of those, then I'm good. o/
 
2014-08-17 11:59:25 AM  

bluorangefyre: NASFARK TWITTER LIST!(Updated 8/10/2014)

bluorangefyre - @bluorangefyre
QueenMamaBee - @KyJockeyLuvr
Mztlplx - @tinfoil_fedora
Professor Farksworth - @DrueBernardi
Foaming - @EvanOlson
Gonz - @Ben_Deckos
radiofreewill - @insert_funny
bionicjoe - @bionicjoe

Follow us and add your name to this list!


anniesmom - @GlammaSandyto2
 
2014-08-17 12:02:53 PM  
You know what else is uncalled for? LEADING THE COVERAGE OFF WITH THIS DEPRESSING STORY!! SERIOUSLY CAN YOU STOP NOW?
 
2014-08-17 12:05:07 PM  

Professor Farksworth: You know what else is uncalled for? LEADING THE COVERAGE OFF WITH THIS DEPRESSING STORY!! SERIOUSLY CAN YOU STOP NOW?


So ESPN keeps failing miserably?

Sheesh!
 
2014-08-17 12:08:28 PM  

crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.


Got a Mercedes Gullwing this year?
 
2014-08-17 12:09:06 PM  
How could NASCAR fark up this rule by not having an exception for fire or other safety factor to get out the car?
 
2014-08-17 12:11:17 PM  

Obscene_CNN: How could NASCAR fark up this rule by not having an exception for fire or other safety factor to get out the car?


I thought they did? If they really don't, that's stupid.
 
2014-08-17 12:11:38 PM  

Mztlplx: crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.

Got a Mercedes Gullwing this year?


Got a pic of one at Mecum auction yesterday. Can't post it while mobile. I'll email ya.
 
2014-08-17 12:12:25 PM  

Obscene_CNN: How could NASCAR fark up this rule by not having an exception for fire or other safety factor to get out the car?


They'll find a way. It's hard to imagine how, but they will succeed.
 
2014-08-17 12:13:34 PM  

SeikaArashi: Obscene_CNN: How could NASCAR fark up this rule by not having an exception for fire or other safety factor to get out the car?

I thought they did? If they really don't, that's stupid.


If they did they didn't mention it while discussing it
 
2014-08-17 12:13:44 PM  
...and Hello NASFARK...

i454.photobucket.com
 
2014-08-17 12:17:13 PM  

Obscene_CNN: How could NASCAR fark up this rule by not having an exception for fire or other safety factor to get out the car?


Seems to me...if the car is on fire, the drivers will make their own exception no matter what the rule is.
 
2014-08-17 12:17:23 PM  

Mztlplx: ...and Hello NASFARK...

[i454.photobucket.com image 850x540]


OMG A HUGE HELLO KITTY :D

and hiiii~
 
2014-08-17 12:23:05 PM  
Also if you had "7 days" for "How long will it take ESPN to recognize Clint Bowyer spinning on the last turn at Watkins Glen  YOU WIN!
 
2014-08-17 12:24:03 PM  
Why does Clintyoucheatingbastich playing with a bubble machine *not* surprise me at all?
 
2014-08-17 12:26:05 PM  
I wish these storms would clear out so it would stop messing up my Dish.
  
Grrrrrrr
 
2014-08-17 12:26:51 PM  

Mztlplx: Why does Clintyoucheatingbastich playing with a bubble machine *not* surprise me at all?


SEE!!! I'm missing all the good stuff!!
 
2014-08-17 12:34:29 PM  
HWSNBN is sponsoring himself today. We're down the rabbit hole, people...
 
2014-08-17 12:35:37 PM  
Oh, I'm afraid the idol will be quite operational once the Chase arrives.
 
2014-08-17 12:39:07 PM  

bluorangefyre: Oh, I'm afraid the idol will be quite operational once the Chase arrives.


Hm. And the haunted iPod rolls into Maiden, "Two Minutes to Midnight".

/at least the iPod Kami has a sense of humor
 
2014-08-17 12:39:16 PM  

Mztlplx: Why does Clintyoucheatingbastich playing with a bubble machine *not* surprise me at all?


Man I rather watch that than to listen to this old guy complain that we don't have box Christmas cards out yet.
 
2014-08-17 12:40:01 PM  

Mztlplx: Why does Clintyoucheatingbastich playing with a bubble machine *not* surprise me at all?


What? They don't look anything alike.
www.recordsale.de cdn1.vox-cdn.com
 
2014-08-17 12:40:50 PM  

crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.


I would, but given your response in the GTO thread, I'm assuming there's not a lot of Ferrari on your roll
 
2014-08-17 12:42:59 PM  

crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.


If you see any Mustangs or Shelbys, grab a few pics.
 
2014-08-17 12:43:01 PM  

SeikaArashi: Mztlplx: Why does Clintyoucheatingbastich playing with a bubble machine *not* surprise me at all?

Man I rather watch that than to listen to this old guy complain that we don't have box Christmas cards out yet.


Ummm..maybe because it's August? Or have they moved Xmas season beyond Labor Day already?
 
2014-08-17 12:43:21 PM  

crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.


Trossi Mercedes if its there. Because some day I and that car will marry.
 
2014-08-17 12:44:37 PM  

Professor Farksworth: crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.

If you see any Mustangs or Shelbys, grab a few pics.


Also Ferrari 250 GTOs if any

And Lotus with small block ford if there.
 
2014-08-17 12:45:17 PM  

Professor Farksworth: crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.

If you see any Mustangs or Shelbys, grab a few pics.


Any old VWs would be good too. Not that I expect a '67 19-window Bus at a Concours....
 
2014-08-17 12:45:49 PM  

Professor Farksworth: crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.

If you see any Mustangs or Shelbys, grab a few pics.


Check your email.
 
2014-08-17 12:47:09 PM  

crotchgrabber: Professor Farksworth: crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.

If you see any Mustangs or Shelbys, grab a few pics.

Check your email.


That thing is awesome!
 
2014-08-17 12:48:06 PM  

Mztlplx: Professor Farksworth: crotchgrabber: Sigh.....

Lunch has been canceled due to fog.

Any requests for specific car pics? There's a lot of weird around today.

If you see any Mustangs or Shelbys, grab a few pics.

Any old VWs would be good too. Not that I expect a '67 19-window Bus at a Concours....


There was a gorgeous 21 window with a boxster engine at the wharf.

If I'm not in Sonoma next week I'll spam the shiat out of the race threads with pics
 
2014-08-17 12:49:47 PM  
img109.imageshack.us
 
2014-08-17 12:50:11 PM  
Fast, CG! $1 mil, geez...

Someday, I will own a MB 300 Gullwing. Mz. Tlplx will have to pay her own way through college.
 
2014-08-17 12:51:43 PM  

Mztlplx: SeikaArashi: Mztlplx: Why does Clintyoucheatingbastich playing with a bubble machine *not* surprise me at all?

Man I rather watch that than to listen to this old guy complain that we don't have box Christmas cards out yet.

Ummm..maybe because it's August? Or have they moved Xmas season beyond Labor Day already?


Hallmark already has some of their Keepsake ornaments out (they were brought out last month).

So apparently that means that we have to have everything else Christmas out too.

We already have Halloween stuff out but I like Halloween.
 
2014-08-17 12:52:05 PM  
img14.imageshack.us

2/3 scale 57 Chevy
 
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