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(Time)   Here is some BS about how to be happier. Or whatever. I'm too angry to read it right now   (time.com) divider line 52
    More: Stupid, Internet Explorer 8  
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3851 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Aug 2014 at 6:37 PM (10 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-08-11 03:18:50 PM  
i522.photobucket.com
 
2014-08-11 04:54:56 PM  
Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month
 
2014-08-11 05:20:00 PM  
images.sodahead.com

/aren't you happier?
//I am
///and that's what counts
 
2014-08-11 06:39:37 PM  
Is it just me or is Time.com one of the most poorly laid out websites around?
 
2014-08-11 06:42:48 PM  
parkinglotconfessional.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-08-11 06:43:50 PM  
MONEY! With that you can have the Above!
 
2014-08-11 06:44:33 PM  
SERENITY NOW
 
2014-08-11 06:44:52 PM  
You know what makes me unhappy? Infographics. Seriously. "Let's take information, and present it in the most difficult to consume way we can imagine, but with cutesy pictures to go with". I'm going to make the controversial statement that the infographic is a larger blight on the Internet than the slideshow.
 
2014-08-11 06:45:26 PM  
I'm sure Time was happy to be paid for that advertisement for "happify.com" masquerading as an article.
 
2014-08-11 06:47:04 PM  
Spend more time being the rich guy in the group. You may have to search for vans down by the river for your new sub-pier group.
 
2014-08-11 06:47:07 PM  
FTA; "What happiness is not : Having all the money you could ever want."

Absolute bullshiat. So many of my problems would be solved by that...

/ is this "rich people" propaganda for plebs like me?
 
2014-08-11 06:47:27 PM  
Whenever I'm feeling down and everything's and everybody's vibe is negative, I call upon that old Negro spiritual and everything's fresh and new and I'm happy:

[Verse 1:]
It might seem crazy what I'm about to say
Sunshine she's here, you can take a break
I'm a hot air balloon that could go to space
With the air, like I don't care baby by the way

{Uh}

[Chorus:]
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you know what happiness is to you
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

[Verse 2:]
Here come bad news talking this and that, yeah,
Well, give me all you got, and don't hold it back, yeah,
Well, I should probably warn you I'll be just fine, yeah,
No offense to you, don't waste your time
Here's why

[Chorus]

{Hey
Go
Uh}

[Bridge:]
(Happy)
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
I said (let me tell you now)
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
I said

[Chorus x2]

{Hey
Go
Uh}

(Happy) [repeats]
Bring me down... can't nothing...
Bring me down... my level's too high...
Bring me down... can't nothing...
Bring me down, I said (let me tell you now)

[Chorus x2]

{Hey
C'mon}

 
2014-08-11 06:50:52 PM  

Lapdance: MONEY! With that you can have the Above!


If not I'd still like to try having more money
 
2014-08-11 06:51:16 PM  
I getting pissed, and I haven't even clicked the tab yet.

Buncha assholes.
 
2014-08-11 06:52:59 PM  
I know infographics don't make me happy, but knowing that I am not going to be happy all the time and that I am not going to be down all the time is amazing, and you know what that is A-O-Farking-K alright with me.

I've settled with content.  I know keeping up with the Joneses makes me more miserable than dealing with mild crap like "Oh, you don't have the latest gadget?" BS.

Life is good.

In truth, sometimes I think something is "wrong" with my brain.  Society (ok, advertising) is telling me one thing, while I'm content to do something other than what they are telling me will make me happy.
 
2014-08-11 06:53:35 PM  
Prey4reign:
"Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof"

I don't know man....a room without a roof doesn't sound very happy to me. Birds that fly overhead are going to crap right in the room. All the furniture is going to get wet when it rains. Then the carpet will start to smell like mildew. Is that happiness? I don't think so. Maybe it's just me, but I prefer my rooms to have roofs.
 
2014-08-11 06:55:07 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?
/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month


Money, seriously--this is it. I am the queen of looking on the bright side, letting things slide, getting over it, moving on, making do, and living on very little, but when you wake up every damn day and you still have to worry about the bills, it's like walking uphill in the snow every day.

You can come crash on my couch. Wouldn't do you any good, though--no jobs in this town. But I know you wouldn't judge my teeny little house and my second-hand everything.
 
2014-08-11 06:55:37 PM  
Well I hate.

/yup.
 
2014-08-11 06:56:07 PM  

GonzoNihilist: Is it just me or is Time.com one of the most poorly laid out websites around?


I was just so farking happy to read that story, especially since it wasn't in paragraph form, (which makes me unhappy), rather, it took the form of some happy little drawings that somehow come off as faux-immature, (which often makes me unhappy).

Am I happy?

Overall?  I'm pissed.

Buncha assholes.
 
2014-08-11 06:56:25 PM  

Forbidden Doughnut: FTA; "What happiness is not : Having all the money you could ever want."

Absolute bullshiat. So many of my problems would be solved by that...

/ is this "rich people" propaganda for plebs like me?


I have basically never had a problem that couldn't be solved with money.
 
2014-08-11 06:57:22 PM  
Subby was right. TFA just me feel miserable.

Fark this BS.
 
2014-08-11 06:58:36 PM  

arghhh: Prey4reign:
"Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof"

I don't know man....a room without a roof doesn't sound very happy to me. Birds that fly overhead are going to crap right in the room. All the furniture is going to get wet when it rains. Then the carpet will start to smell like mildew. Is that happiness? I don't think so. Maybe it's just me, but I prefer my rooms to have roofs.


{Hey
Go
Uh}
 
2014-08-11 07:00:18 PM  

cryinoutloud: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?
/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month

Money, seriously--this is it. I am the queen of looking on the bright side, letting things slide, getting over it, moving on, making do, and living on very little, but when you wake up every damn day and you still have to worry about the bills, it's like walking uphill in the snow every day.

You can come crash on my couch. Wouldn't do you any good, though--no jobs in this town. But I know you wouldn't judge my teeny little house and my second-hand everything.


There are no jobs, when I was an admin for unnamed company in 2001 we had 700 resumes A DAY for C++ work.

just because you had to walk uphill both ways doesn't make you Monty python..
 
2014-08-11 07:00:40 PM  
Not having to go to work every damn day would make my happiness increase dramatically.  So basically, I need someone to give me $60K+ a year and this can become a reality.
 
2014-08-11 07:01:08 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month


No EIP, how can anyone send you money?
 
2014-08-11 07:01:55 PM  

Forbidden Doughnut: FTA; "What happiness is not : Having all the money you could ever want."
Absolute bullshiat. So many of my problems would be solved by that...
/ is this "rich people" propaganda for plebs like me?


"Wants" are infinite, right? So "all the money you could ever want" is never going to be enough. Just like all the stuff you can buy with your money is never enough. So that is technically correct, although the judge has it ruled it as "shut up, stupid article."
 
2014-08-11 07:02:18 PM  
Anger can be good. I think Groucho Marx may be the greatest American comedian. Anger allowed that.

One evening, a performance by the Marx brothers (vaudeville singers) at the Opera House in Nacogdoches, Texas, was interrupted by shouts from outside about a runaway mule. The audience hurried out to see what was happening. When the audience returned, Groucho, angered by the interruption, made snide comments about the audience, including "Nacogdoches is full of roaches" and "The jackass is the flower of Tex-ass". Instead of becoming angry, the audience laughed. The Marx brothers then realized they could be a comic troupe.

So, there it is subby. Point your finger at someone and call them a jackass. YMMV
 
2014-08-11 07:02:45 PM  
Happiness is a physical state. Exercise, eat somewhat healthy, get the right kind of sleep, and engage in activities that increase happiness ( singin. Being in nature. Etc etc ).

Your body is a machine, as is your brain ( as an analogy, of course.). Your environment and what you do has a massive effect on your happiness, just like the environment around your car and what you do with it affects how well it runs.

The most important thing is that you shouldn't be stupid by being too smart to do stupid things that bring happiness.
 
2014-08-11 07:02:53 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month


I know how you can save $5 a month. You won't even miss anything.
 
2014-08-11 07:03:22 PM  
I have found that hormone replacements and antidepressants work great. When you through in pain pills and muscle relaxants and nothing can get you down.
 
2014-08-11 07:03:35 PM  
Just smile, Biatch.
 
2014-08-11 07:04:12 PM  
I'd really like the opportunity to prove that a metric assload of money CAN'T make me happy.
 
2014-08-11 07:04:54 PM  

ghare: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month

No EIP, how can anyone send you money?


I know this feeling, though it probably 2-3 month out for me.
 
2014-08-11 07:07:53 PM  

ghare: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month

No EIP, how can anyone send you money?


Well, I really don't expect anyone to

/I'm trying to find another job, but it's not easy when you're nearly 60 and a diabetic
//haven't given up yet, but things are getting pretty grim
//and thank you for the offer, cryinoutloud
 
2014-08-11 07:08:32 PM  

Jack Lambert's Missing Teeth: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month

I know how you can save $5 a month. You won't even miss anything.


Unfortunately they don't give refunds
 
2014-08-11 07:09:27 PM  
Good to see TIME reaching for that Under-8 market.
 
2014-08-11 07:10:17 PM  

Forbidden Doughnut: FTA; "What happiness is not : Having all the money you could ever want."

Absolute bullshiat. So many of my problems would be solved by that...

/ is this "rich people" propaganda for plebs like me?


The biggest problem with having all the money you could ever want is defining how much is enough.  Most people attempt to peg a real number to how much.  But, those who manage to make that number will report that the number is no longer enough.  You think "if only I won the lottery that would solve all my problems" but how many stories are there about lottery winners who end up spending it all either by pissing it away on frivolous purchases or doomed to failure investments.  Or there are the stories about how the winner of astounding amounts of money who suddenly have relatives and friends all needing just a piece of what was won.  The truth of the matter is that the money dries up for most lottery winners long before their winnings are gone.

So, if you aren't going to hit the lottery (and whom amongst us is) the only legal alternative is you are forced into earning your dream number.  But all too often this doesn't work out.  Why?  Because things change and you've grown accustomed how to overspend what you've got once you're earning what you thought was your dream number.  Beyond that fact of finding that X amount of dollars is no longer enough, there are also the prices you pay to make more money.  Less time with the family, more travel, more weekends given up to get things done that should have been accomplished during the regular work week.  And let's face it, the vast majority of us are never going to reach that magic number, no matter how hard you work or how high up you get up the career ladder.

So, in reality, you're neither going to win or earn the real amount that would make you happy.  But that's alright, because it will force you into doing a good bit of introspection and you can begin concentrating your questions about what makes really makes you happy.
 
2014-08-11 07:10:34 PM  

albatros183: ghare: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month

No EIP, how can anyone send you money?

I know this feeling, though it probably 2-3 month out for me.


Good luck, y'all. Been there. I sympathize deeply.

/jobs in Orlando right now.
 
2014-08-11 07:11:08 PM  
Oh Lawd, Time is so embarrassing. There sure was a lot of scientific proof in that "article". No wait, I mean lots of colorful icons and clip art surrounded by meaningless platitudes and musings about happiness with no real analysis of cause and effect.  "Happiness is how satisfied you are with life + how good you feel on a day-to-day basis."  Really?  Is it?  So what units do I use to measure that exactly?   Picofarads? Kilopotatoes? Thanks Time, for going through the effort of dumbing down something that was worthless pseudo-science to begin with.

/clearly I'm not happy
 
2014-08-11 07:15:06 PM  

Sushi and the Banshees: I'd really like the opportunity to prove that a metric assload of money CAN'T make me happy.


Money is not the key to happiness!
With enough money you can buy the key to everything else!!
Ergo; shopping must make us happy!!!
 
2014-08-11 07:23:31 PM  
I recall an independent inventor, named Stimpson J, who in 1992 created some fascinating headgear that may change your perspective of things.
 
2014-08-11 07:27:50 PM  
"Money can't buy everything."

"Someone must have told you that.  You'd never think of such a platitude all by yourself.  What can't it buy?"

"Oh, I don't know -- well, not happiness or love, anyway."

"Generally it can.  And when it can't, it can buy some of the most remarkable substitutes."

Meh, I ain't got squat for money.  Most of the suggestions for "happiness" are crap if you can't bear to lie to yourself.

I'm figuring the Buddhist philosophy is probably the best route for any sort of sanity or reasonable amount of contentment.  Wherein form is no different from not-form.  Nothing is the exact same as something when it all evens out in the end.  Here one moment and gone the next.  Whether you cling to the things you value or not, it all crumbles to dust eventually.  Drift through life without becoming hopelessly attached because you can't take it with you.

Rather than finding that depressing, it feels oddly comforting to me.

Better than vaguely hoping a sky wizard will fix the mess he/she/it apparently made in the first place, at least.
 
2014-08-11 07:32:19 PM  

PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: I'm figuring the Buddhist philosophy is probably the best route for any sort of sanity or reasonable amount of contentment.  Wherein form is no different from not-form.  Nothing is the exact same as something when it all evens out in the end.  Here one moment and gone the next.  Whether you cling to the things you value or not, it all crumbles to dust eventually.  Drift through life without becoming hopelessly attached because you can't take it with you.


Not religious myself, but that's actually pretty wise advice, IMHO.
 
2014-08-11 07:35:21 PM  
This thread reminds me of an old quote...a quick google failed, but I'm think it was Diamond Dave.

"Money might not buy happiness, but it can sure buy off a lot of unhappiness." or something like that.
 
2014-08-11 07:39:42 PM  
If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty woman your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you
 
2014-08-11 07:55:51 PM  
Do you want to know what's not making me happy?  Robin Williams killed himself today.
 
2014-08-11 07:56:22 PM  

ghare: albatros183: ghare: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Want to make me much happier?

/Send money
//seriously... I may be homeless by next month

No EIP, how can anyone send you money?

I know this feeling, though it probably 2-3 month out for me.

Good luck, y'all. Been there. I sympathize deeply.

/jobs in Orlando right now.


In cunukasatin so no and also WTF I am gonna travel half way across north america. sorry it is 1932...?
 
2014-08-11 08:00:45 PM  

Prey4reign: Do you want to know what's not making me happy?  Robin Williams killed himself today.


Well it is actually hopeless.

/He was right.
 
2014-08-11 08:08:48 PM  

Forbidden Doughnut: PleaseHamletDon'tHurtEm: I'm figuring the Buddhist philosophy is probably the best route for any sort of sanity or reasonable amount of contentment.  Wherein form is no different from not-form.  Nothing is the exact same as something when it all evens out in the end.  Here one moment and gone the next.  Whether you cling to the things you value or not, it all crumbles to dust eventually.  Drift through life without becoming hopelessly attached because you can't take it with you.

Not religious myself, but that's actually pretty wise advice, IMHO.


The whole of Buddhism, minus the whole enlightenment bit (which I find rather dodgy myself), seems to boil down to "don't expect much out of life and you won't be disappointed."  Again, I guess some people find that appalling, but I prefer realism over hoping just maybe someone will show up and fix it all.
 
2014-08-11 08:50:09 PM  
Sometimes I wish I was stupid(er), then I might be more happy more often.

As it is I overanalyse, constantly, with an implacable cynicism.

I know I can drink myself happy in the short term. If I kill enough braincells will it be long term too?
 
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