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(Marketwatch)   Five reasons not to retire abroad   (marketwatch.com) divider line 37
    More: Obvious  
•       •       •

2435 clicks; posted to Business » on 08 Aug 2014 at 9:02 AM (41 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



37 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-08-08 07:46:46 AM  
Who can retire? I'll be working till I die.
 
2014-08-08 08:04:11 AM  
What if she's a Replicant? Then you have to retire her.
 
2014-08-08 09:07:42 AM  
I came to post a bad pun, but...

Mugato: What if she's a Replicant? Then you have to retire her.


www.quickmeme.com

/awesome;D
 
2014-08-08 09:12:19 AM  
Is there no editorial oversight at MarketWatch?
 
2014-08-08 09:13:19 AM  

mutterfark: I came to post a bad pun, but...

Mugato: What if she's a Replicant? Then you have to retire her.

[www.quickmeme.com image 499x451]

/awesome;D


walks away sullenly grumbling.

/well played and all
 
2014-08-08 09:16:07 AM  
Personal safety:  Meh.  I'm supposed to be absolutely terrified of home invasions, street gangs, and everything else in this country and I've been fine so far.

Medical services:  It's already expensive and a pain in the ass here.

Language barrier:  So you're saying I don't have to talk to anybody if I don't want to?

Homesickness, nostalgia:  Homesickness is for pussies.

Unforeseen expenses:  Life is pretty much a series of unforseen expenses.

The real downsides of life in a foreign country that isn't Canada, Germany, Switzerland, or the UK is that services move at a snails pace.  You call a plumber and he might make it out in the next 4 days unless it's August and then he's not coming at all.
 
2014-08-08 09:19:34 AM  
I was hoping for a list of reasons that wouldn't be the first five you'd consider yourself if you've every been out of the country and thought, even briefly, about living abroad.
 
2014-08-08 09:20:00 AM  

tricycleracer: Is there no editorial oversight at MarketWatch?


I think they don't which is why their writers are referred to as "contributors" and they're usually shilling a book.  Check out this guy:

By Dan Barnabic
About Dan
Dan S. Barnabic is a noted consumer advocate and keen observer of condo proliferation. He has worked in real estate as an agent, broker, property manager, and condominium developer. His over four decades in the real estate industry began in the 1970s, and intensified after he witnessed the major crashes of the early 1990s and 2006. Barnabic is the author of The Condo Bible, which is available in both Canadian and American editions and in paperback and e-book.


What the hell is a keen observer of condo proliferation?  Like he just noticed that a lot of condos are being built and now he's a keen observer of them.  I keenly observed that they're building a Bojangles the other day so buy my book about fried chicken.
 
2014-08-08 09:20:27 AM  
What if she stops washing the dishes?
 
2014-08-08 09:21:32 AM  
You know the authors of the types of articles should consider becoming drug mules. That way they could pull stuff from their ass that at least has value.
 
2014-08-08 09:23:32 AM  
Summary:

It's scary and foreign

If you are going to retire in Latin America and haven't learned Spanish, you deserve what you get. It would take a couple years to become conversant in any language you want.

Me? Philippines, Thailand or Florida. As long as it's warm and there's water nearby I don't care about the other crap.
 
2014-08-08 09:25:22 AM  

Rapmaster2000: What the hell is a keen observer of condo proliferation?


I was wondering that too. I guess anyone who lived in Vancouver during the 1990's or Hoboken during the real estate bubble.
 
2014-08-08 09:32:45 AM  

H31N0US: Rapmaster2000: What the hell is a keen observer of condo proliferation?

I was wondering that too. I guess anyone who lived in Vancouver during the 1990's or Hoboken during the real estate bubble.


In 2000, I keenly observed that the value of a company that sold pet food over the internet was overvalued so that makes me a keen observer of the technology sector.
 
2014-08-08 09:38:52 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Personal safety:  Meh.  I'm supposed to be absolutely terrified of home invasions, street gangs, and everything else in this country and I've been fine so far.


In S. America things are a bit different.

My wife grew up middle class in Argentina, her friends and family are professionals, doing pretty well and living in decent areas.

Within the past 2-3 years:

Her sister's family had armed men barge into her house and rob her
One of her friends were robbed at gun point in their house twice
Her mother had her purse stolen at gun point on the street


So things are bit different S of texas.
 
2014-08-08 09:43:16 AM  
Retire her?

I just met her!
 
2014-08-08 09:46:43 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Personal safety:  Meh.  I'm supposed to be absolutely terrified of home invasions, street gangs, and everything else in this country and I've been fine so far.

Medical services:  It's already expensive and a pain in the ass here.

Language barrier:  So you're saying I don't have to talk to anybody if I don't want to?

Homesickness, nostalgia:  Homesickness is for pussies.

Unforeseen expenses:  Life is pretty much a series of unforseen expenses.

The real downsides of life in a foreign country that isn't Canada, Germany, Switzerland, or the UK is that services move at a snails pace.  You call a plumber and he might make it out in the next 4 days unless it's August and then he's not coming at all.


Yep.  All of what you said.
 
2014-08-08 09:55:34 AM  

sendtodave: Rapmaster2000: Personal safety:  Meh.  I'm supposed to be absolutely terrified of home invasions, street gangs, and everything else in this country and I've been fine so far.

Medical services:  It's already expensive and a pain in the ass here.

Language barrier:  So you're saying I don't have to talk to anybody if I don't want to?

Homesickness, nostalgia:  Homesickness is for pussies.

Unforeseen expenses:  Life is pretty much a series of unforseen expenses.

The real downsides of life in a foreign country that isn't Canada, Germany, Switzerland, or the UK is that services move at a snails pace.  You call a plumber and he might make it out in the next 4 days unless it's August and then he's not coming at all.

Yep.  All of what you said.


My parents make a similar complaint about their retirement in Florida.  People call it hurricane mentality.  Everything is late and half-ass because why should you care if it's going to get blown away anyway.

Yeah, we're crude, bigoted Northerners.  I'm fine with it.
 
2014-08-08 09:55:46 AM  
Retirement is at least 25 years out for me.  Foreign travel appeals to me now, I could see longer stints in a country in retirement but I can't see myself staying put in one place forever.  Buenos Aires would be good for quite a while as long as the dollars keep flowing.
 
2014-08-08 10:01:12 AM  
Well, since EVERYBODY has made the joke......
 
2014-08-08 10:04:02 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Everything is late and half-ass because why should you care if it's going to get blown away anyway.


Different cause, same effect.

My experience in the developing world is "there isn't any."

Need something?  Anything?  They already ran out of it.
 
2014-08-08 10:07:12 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Personal safety:  Meh.  I'm supposed to be absolutely terrified of home invasions, street gangs, and everything else in this country and I've been fine so far.

Medical services:  It's already expensive and a pain in the ass here.

Language barrier:  So you're saying I don't have to talk to anybody if I don't want to?

Homesickness, nostalgia:  Homesickness is for pussies.

Unforeseen expenses:  Life is pretty much a series of unforseen expenses.

The real downsides of life in a foreign country that isn't Canada, Germany, Switzerland, or the UK is that services move at a snails pace.  You call a plumber and he might make it out in the next 4 days unless it's August and then he's not coming at all.


www.jeffanddeeonline.com

That's what beer and margaritas are for.
 
2014-08-08 10:07:51 AM  
But the teenage prostitutes are so much cheaper overseas.
 
2014-08-08 10:13:54 AM  

Nadie_AZ: What if she stops washing the dishes?


It depends. Does she already have two black eyes?
 
kab
2014-08-08 10:40:51 AM  

H31N0US: If you are going to retire in Latin America and haven't learned Spanish, you deserve what you get.


Conversely, if you're going to retire in the US and haven't learned english, you can just stamp your feet, cry about how unfair it is that you have to learn a new language, and blame racism.
 
2014-08-08 10:46:14 AM  

Wellon Dowd: But the teenage prostitutes are so much cheaper overseas.


When I was in Cebu, a commercial came on tv for a pool hall that was packed with "young accommodating women". I asked my wife if we should go there.
 
2014-08-08 11:09:07 AM  
cuz chicks only make 74 cents to the man dollar?
 
2014-08-08 11:13:11 AM  

H31N0US: Wellon Dowd: But the teenage prostitutes are so much cheaper overseas.

When I was in Cebu, a commercial came on tv for a pool hall that was packed with "young accommodating women".


With a capital P and that rhymes with T which stands for "transvestite"?
 
2014-08-08 11:34:16 AM  

H31N0US: Wellon Dowd: But the teenage prostitutes are so much cheaper overseas.

When I was in Cebu, a commercial came on tv for a pool hall that was packed with "young accommodating women". I asked my wife if we should go there.


Maybe it just means they can cram a bunch of pool balls in their mouths.
 
2014-08-08 12:16:20 PM  
FTFA:  Given the above considerations, I strongly believe that America is the greatest and most beautiful country in the world, providing its citizens with the best of civil and financial securities. So unless you happen to be an adventurer, stay home and retire where you belong.

I genuinely can't abide people like this. And while I am someone who believes that America is, in general, a great country... it's tools like this that give us a bad name.
 
2014-08-08 12:37:25 PM  
I'm retiring as a dude, thankyouverymuch.
 
2014-08-08 12:45:21 PM  
FTFA:  Given the above considerations, I strongly believe that America is the greatest and most beautiful country in the world, providing its citizens with the best of civil and financial securities. So unless you happen to be an adventurer, stay home and retire where you belong.

If the author has a mailing list, I would like to buy it and send out fliers for my Old Glory Robot Insurance agency.
 
2014-08-08 01:32:17 PM  
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought that if you retired outside of the U.S that you couldn't collect Social Security (insert joke about it not being around anyway or that it pays too little to matter).

I've thought about Belize because it's super cheap and they speak English. Shhhhh, don't tell anyone!
 
2014-08-08 02:21:45 PM  
McAfee already farked up Belize... But Panama is still sweet. I need me a 16 yr old Nanny, a 17 yr old asst Cook, and a 18 yr old Upstairs Maid...

And yes; there will be a wiener test.
 
2014-08-08 04:23:26 PM  

Swampmaster: McAfee already farked up Belize... But Panama is still sweet. I need me a 16 yr old Nanny, a 17 yr old asst Cook, and a 18 yr old Upstairs Maid...

And yes; there will be a wiener test.


Lol McAfee's departure form Belize was a gift to Belizian's and tourists alike. Seriously...that country is a gem compared to the rest of Latin America.
 
2014-08-08 06:15:20 PM  
Spain, Portugal or Greece would be great places to retire to, if you had a few thousand American dollars in retirement income a month.  Safer than Latin America, and only a few hours flight (or high speed rail) to all that Europe has to offer for a holiday.  Might make Thanksgiving dinner a pain in the ass, but that's what Skype was invented for right?
 
2014-08-08 08:30:54 PM  

8 inches: Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought that if you retired outside of the U.S that you couldn't collect Social Security (insert joke about it not being around anyway or that it pays too little to matter).

I've thought about Belize because it's super cheap and they speak English. Shhhhh, don't tell anyone!




No issues having SS deposited into a foreign bank. Medicare, however, is only available in the US.
 
2014-08-09 08:39:03 AM  

Mugato: What if she's a Replicant? Then you have to retire her.


It's comforting to know that if I ever want to kill myself I just have to fail a Voight-Kampf test

I won't tell you      only the good words that come into my mind about     my mother.
 
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