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(Action A Go-Go)   Get your bows and arrows ready. Store canned food. Beef up on that survival knowledge. People are starting to defend STAR WARS: The Phantom Menace as a good movie. The end is nigh   (actionagogo.com) divider line 127
    More: Scary, The Phantom Menace, Star Wars, threats, television pilot  
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1658 clicks; posted to Geek » on 04 Aug 2014 at 9:19 AM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-08-04 08:02:24 AM  
Nope.  It's just that people who were kids when they first saw it are now in their mid-to-late 20's.

It's kind of like the wave of nostalgia for the 1950's that happened in the 1970s, the 1960's nostalgia in the 1980's, and so forth.
 
2014-08-04 08:24:39 AM  

dittybopper: Nope.  It's just that people who were kids when they first saw it are now in their mid-to-late 20's.

It's kind of like the wave of nostalgia for the 1950's that happened in the 1970s, the 1960's nostalgia in the 1980's, and so forth.


What's nostalgic about a movie that sucks? And why pigeonhole it to one age group? A movie that sucks...still sucks.
 
2014-08-04 08:48:08 AM  

Norad: dittybopper: Nope.  It's just that people who were kids when they first saw it are now in their mid-to-late 20's.

It's kind of like the wave of nostalgia for the 1950's that happened in the 1970s, the 1960's nostalgia in the 1980's, and so forth.

What's nostalgic about a movie that sucks? And why pigeonhole it to one age group? A movie that sucks...still sucks.


OK, think back to when you were a kid.  Maybe you had a TV show or movie that was geared towards kids that you really liked.  Then years later, you decide to re-watch it.  And you find out it was utter crap, because you were stupid, because you were a kid.

This is just like that, except the people in question can't come to grips with their childhood stupidity.
 
2014-08-04 08:58:19 AM  

dittybopper: Norad: dittybopper: Nope.  It's just that people who were kids when they first saw it are now in their mid-to-late 20's.

It's kind of like the wave of nostalgia for the 1950's that happened in the 1970s, the 1960's nostalgia in the 1980's, and so forth.

What's nostalgic about a movie that sucks? And why pigeonhole it to one age group? A movie that sucks...still sucks.

OK, think back to when you were a kid.  Maybe you had a TV show or movie that was geared towards kids that you really liked.  Then years later, you decide to re-watch it.  And you find out it was utter crap, because you were stupid, because you were a kid.

This is just like that, except the people in question can't come to grips with their childhood stupidity.


That reminds me, MacGyver was awesome no matter what you say!
 
2014-08-04 09:00:19 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-08-04 09:11:43 AM  
if you take out all the shiatty parts, it was a fantastic film.
 
2014-08-04 09:13:16 AM  

ManateeGag: if you take out all the shiatty parts, it was a fantastic film.


Of course it's also down to the opening and closing crawls.  But damn, those are fantastic.
 
2014-08-04 09:13:17 AM  

ManateeGag: if you take out all the shiatty parts, it was a fantastic film.


All 39 seconds of it.
 
2014-08-04 09:13:42 AM  
One. Freaking. Second.  :-|
 
2014-08-04 09:14:25 AM  

xanadian: One. Freaking. Second.  :-|


High Five!
 
2014-08-04 09:23:29 AM  
You'll laugh! You'll cry! You'll kiss three bucks goodbye!
 
2014-08-04 09:28:16 AM  
I came to the realization over the weekend, that if Jar Jar Binks was replaced with Rocket and Groot, Episode I would have been 17 times better.
 
2014-08-04 09:31:12 AM  
You mean besides the gargantuan plot holes, the godawful completely flat for every shot camera angle, and the complete lack of depth, characters that you care about, or anything resembling a plot, it just *might* be a good movie.

Though without TPM we wouldn't have Red Letter Media's review of it, which always makes me laugh inside.
 
2014-08-04 09:32:49 AM  
"If there is one most vital element to a  Star Wars film, it's a sense of wonder."

True.  *watches Phantom Menace*

I wonder why they made that cinematic turd.
 
2014-08-04 09:37:41 AM  

ManateeGag: if you take out all the shiatty parts, it was a fantastic film.


Yeah, but all that is left is the ending credits.
 
2014-08-04 09:39:43 AM  
Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.
 
2014-08-04 09:40:29 AM  

UberDave: [img.fark.net image 440x247]


I really wish they would have done more of the scene by scene remake they were goofing around with.
 
2014-08-04 09:40:42 AM  

xanadian: ManateeGag: if you take out all the shiatty parts, it was a fantastic film.

All 39 seconds of it.


i think 39 minutes maybe.

1. the opening scene (first 15 minutes or so up until they leave the ship for the surface) - if the movie had kept this tone and pacing it might have been great. for years we had been hearing about how jedi were these badass problem solvers but we never really saw it in action. other than obi wan doing a few tricks here and there, and yoda blabbing away, the only jedi we really saw was luke who was a noob. the beginning of this film really set them up as some cool dudes and also showed that obiwan was actually a badass and not just the guy who quit fighting darth vader halfway through his duel..

2. the pod race - ok it was just race but visually and sonically it's quite a spectacle

3. anything involving darth maul - really wish we learned more about this guy, he was badass in every scene and the fights involving him, including at the end, were really cool and did a nice job of updating the action to more modern post-hongkong action type fights
 
2014-08-04 09:40:48 AM  
It was a poor movie, further hurt by the insane expectations of the viewers.

What's sad to me is that there is a good movie hidden in that pile, and it's a shame they couldn't provide it. The basic framework, visual style, and narrative is there.  A few decent acting jobs.  But they killed it with weak shooting/technical elements, some bad story choices, flat acting against too many green screens, and the compulsive need to dumb it down.

And it got even worse in Episode II, where they lost the good narrative.
 
2014-08-04 09:41:38 AM  

Delta1212: Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.


I think it definitely suffers from inflated expectations simply for being a Star Wars film.

That said, it was still awful.
 
2014-08-04 09:42:58 AM  
blogs-images.forbes.com
 
2014-08-04 09:43:21 AM  
media.soletron.com
 
2014-08-04 09:43:25 AM  
I work in IT and am surrounded by Star Wars fanatics. George Lucas could film a cat taking a shiat amd they'd buy it the moment it got to DVD. After seeing it 12 times in the theater. And buying the T-shirt.

Every bit as bad a the Harley fanatics.

/love my Harleys
//Wish they had Honda motors
 
2014-08-04 09:43:27 AM  
I just feel if it had more people arguing about galactic trade embargos it would've been more successful.
 
2014-08-04 09:47:34 AM  

HeartBurnKid: Delta1212: Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.

I think it definitely suffers from inflated expectations simply for being a Star Wars film.

That said, it was still awful.


My friend got me free tickets to an Episode II screening.  Some guy came with a Jar Jar mask on  and he was attacked by people in the audience as he made his was to his seat.  The stopped him, pushed him against the rail, ripped his mask off, and stomped on it as a group.  The mask got torn and the kid, who wore the mask as a joke, was totally shaken up to the point that he didnt stay for the movie.

It was one of the craziest things I have ever seen.  It is silly but I could never really give a shiat about Star Wars after that.
 
2014-08-04 09:48:58 AM  

Gunny Highway: HeartBurnKid: Delta1212: Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.

I think it definitely suffers from inflated expectations simply for being a Star Wars film.

That said, it was still awful.

My friend got me free tickets to an Episode II screening.  Some guy came with a Jar Jar mask on  and he was attacked by people in the audience as he made his was to his seat.  The stopped him, pushed him against the rail, ripped his mask off, and stomped on it as a group.  The mask got torn and the kid, who wore the mask as a joke, was totally shaken up to the point that he didnt stay for the movie.

It was one of the craziest things I have ever seen.  It is silly but I could never really give a shiat about Star Wars after that.


Yeah, I could imagine that'd be pretty disturbing to watch.
 
2014-08-04 09:51:36 AM  

spesimen: 3. anything involving darth maul - really wish we learned more about this guy, he was badass in every scene and the fights involving him, including at the end, were really cool and did a nice job of updating the action to more modern post-hongkong action type fights


You know, I could give you the first two, but not this, or at least not the last light-saber fight with him and the two jedi. Sure, it looked impressively choreographed at first glance, until you realize that not a single attack is attempting to actually hurt the opponent. All attacks are aimed at hitting light sabers. To the extent that Darth Maul could have shut his light saber down and pretty much every swing would have missed him. OOOOOooo, you just blocked his light saber from hitting empty air! Good job there!

It was all swinging and wild acrobatics and no fighting or combat at all. 

And, it was among the least of the film's problems. 

/getting pretty sick of stupid fighting in movies; I want to see fighting where it looks like the opponents are actually trying to hurt, maim, or kill each other, not swing at each other's weapons.
//related, but not Star Wars, sick of fist fights with robots where the person attacks the robot like they'd attack another person. ProTip: punching a robot in the face will only break your hand
 
2014-08-04 09:56:44 AM  

mamoru: spesimen: 3. anything involving darth maul - really wish we learned more about this guy, he was badass in every scene and the fights involving him, including at the end, were really cool and did a nice job of updating the action to more modern post-hongkong action type fights

You know, I could give you the first two, but not this, or at least not the last light-saber fight with him and the two jedi. Sure, it looked impressively choreographed at first glance, until you realize that not a single attack is attempting to actually hurt the opponent. All attacks are aimed at hitting light sabers. To the extent that Darth Maul could have shut his light saber down and pretty much every swing would have missed him. OOOOOooo, you just blocked his light saber from hitting empty air! Good job there!

It was all swinging and wild acrobatics and no fighting or combat at all. 

And, it was among the least of the film's problems. 

/getting pretty sick of stupid fighting in movies; I want to see fighting where it looks like the opponents are actually trying to hurt, maim, or kill each other, not swing at each other's weapons.
//related, but not Star Wars, sick of fist fights with robots where the person attacks the robot like they'd attack another person. ProTip: punching a robot in the face will only break your hand


"Because it looks cool" is not acceptable anymore?
 
2014-08-04 10:00:29 AM  
It is certainly no worse than any of the original movies. I've heard your reasons, I've listened to all the biatching and moaning about how terrible the prequels are, but you are wrong. They are on par with the OT and none of your childhood fondness for the OT makes the PT worse.
 
2014-08-04 10:01:01 AM  
And they are wrong.
 
2014-08-04 10:01:51 AM  
mamoru:
/getting pretty sick of stupid fighting in movies; I want to see fighting where it looks like the opponents are actually trying to hurt, maim, or kill each other, not swing at each other's weapons.

img.fark.net

At the very least you get to watch two hot Asian chicks fight each other...
 
2014-08-04 10:05:13 AM  

KidneyStone: I work in IT and am surrounded by Star Wars fanatics. George Lucas could film a cat taking a shiat amd they'd buy it the moment it got to DVD. After seeing it 12 times in the theater. And buying the T-shirt.

Every bit as bad a the Harley fanatics.

/love my Harleys
//Wish they had Honda motors


I like Harleys too.
static.comicvine.com
 
2014-08-04 10:06:01 AM  

mamoru: You know, I could give you the first two, but not this, or at least not the last light-saber fight with him and the two jedi. Sure, it looked impressively choreographed at first glance, until you realize that not a single attack is attempting to actually hurt the opponent. All attacks are aimed at hitting light sabers. To the extent that Darth Maul could have shut his light saber down and pretty much every swing would have missed him. OOOOOooo, you just blocked his light saber from hitting empty air! Good job there!


All of that, plus: there's not a lot of character background or tension that leads to the fight.  I mean, we know that Darth Maul is bad, and the Jedi are good.  But there's no other motivation for the fight.  In ANH, Obi-wan fights Vader to help his friends escape (after Vader and the Imperials have been trying to hunt them all over the Death Star).  In ESB, Luke fights Vader (and willingly walks into his trap) to rescue Han and Leia.  In ROTJ, Luke goes to confront Vader to complete the task of becoming a Jedi and attempt to turn Vader back to the light.

RedLetterMedia pointed it out first, but the lightsaber fights in the original trilogy weren't just fights---they were a different sort of interaction between the characters, and the style of the fighting from both characters gave you insight into their feelings and motivations.  The fights weren't so athletic and beautifully choreographed, but they were meaningful.

In contrast, the Phantom Menace lightsaber fight was visually amazing, but ultimately didn't have the kind of background or character interaction that would have made it interesting.

Now that I think about it, the podrace scene was much better---it was visually thrilling, but also had some background and consequences (the outcome of the race would determine whether Anakin could be free, and whether the heroes could repair their ship and leave Tattooine).
 
2014-08-04 10:06:26 AM  

Gunny Highway: mamoru: spesimen: 3. anything involving darth maul - really wish we learned more about this guy, he was badass in every scene and the fights involving him, including at the end, were really cool and did a nice job of updating the action to more modern post-hongkong action type fights

You know, I could give you the first two, but not this, or at least not the last light-saber fight with him and the two jedi. Sure, it looked impressively choreographed at first glance, until you realize that not a single attack is attempting to actually hurt the opponent. All attacks are aimed at hitting light sabers. To the extent that Darth Maul could have shut his light saber down and pretty much every swing would have missed him. OOOOOooo, you just blocked his light saber from hitting empty air! Good job there!

It was all swinging and wild acrobatics and no fighting or combat at all. 

And, it was among the least of the film's problems. 

/getting pretty sick of stupid fighting in movies; I want to see fighting where it looks like the opponents are actually trying to hurt, maim, or kill each other, not swing at each other's weapons.
//related, but not Star Wars, sick of fist fights with robots where the person attacks the robot like they'd attack another person. ProTip: punching a robot in the face will only break your hand

"Because it looks cool" is not acceptable anymore?


Star Wars: a children's story about space ninja pirate wizards. And giant teddy bears.

Serious business. We can't have any ridiculous fighting scenes in that, while they SWING THE LASER SWORDS AT EACH OTHER. No, must be completely realistic. Punching a robot in the face is teh dumbz.
 
2014-08-04 10:08:39 AM  
Let's see what Deadpool has to say! Deadpool?

img.fark.net
 
2014-08-04 10:08:51 AM  

Norad: dittybopper: Nope.  It's just that people who were kids when they first saw it are now in their mid-to-late 20's.

It's kind of like the wave of nostalgia for the 1950's that happened in the 1970s, the 1960's nostalgia in the 1980's, and so forth.

What's nostalgic about a movie that sucks? And why pigeonhole it to one age group? A movie that sucks...still sucks.


Nostalgia gave us an entire Transformer franchise that was based off of a series of cartoons that were, by any objective standard, kind of crappy. Never, ever underestimate people's love for things that they experienced as kids.
 
2014-08-04 10:18:30 AM  

s2s2s2: It is certainly no worse than any of the original movies. I've heard your reasons, I've listened to all the biatching and moaning about how terrible the prequels are, but you are wrong. They are on par with the OT and none of your childhood fondness for the OT makes the PT worse.


Well, the first one was a space themed 'rescue the princess from the castle' tale with the 'boy who longs to become something more' story. It worked. What made the first movie stand apart was the special effects. At the time, they blew people's minds.

The 2nd was good, a nice 'bad guys win' movie. The twist at the end seemed like it could fit. Where Lucas lost his mind with a simple, fun, story was with RotJ when he decides that ALL loose ends have to be neat and tidy and somehow Leia is not someone Luke and Han can go love triangle on- she is a hidden uber secret sister that the now ghost hid and made everyone forget. Among other things. And the whole 'dad' thing works enough to close out the trilogy with less of a bang and more than a whimper.

But the real explosion of the popularity had less to do with stories and all that and more to do with special effects which broke ground in movie making. As a boy I was blown away by how real space and everything looked. And space ships. And pew pew pew. And aliens. And explosions. And laser swords with ancient sounding names. For me, the story line was second. Or third. The toys may have been second.
 
2014-08-04 10:22:37 AM  
Its not as bad as attack of the clones.

I will say no more in its defense.
 
2014-08-04 10:29:00 AM  
I liked Phantom Menace.  Got to see it with a good friend from work back in 1999.  People applauded at the end of the movie.  I am happy to know three things about the Star Wars universe.  The first is that we've seen only two-thirds of the overall story.  The second is that Episodes I - VI are all that matter, EU be damned.  The third is (hopefully!) that Boba Fett was eaten by the Sarlacc.  He's dead, Jim.
 
2014-08-04 10:34:59 AM  
It was pointed out to me a couple of years ago by someone on Fark that the film doesn't even have a protagonist. Qui Gon is clearly in the mentor role, Obi Wan gets farkall screentime and Anakin isn't introduced until a goddamn hour into the film.

I don't even know how you write a script and forget that rather important element. It's astonishing to me that Lucas managed it, but it goes a long way to explaining why the movie sucks so much. Clones and Sith are still pretty crappy but at least they've got Obi Wan definitively in the protagonist role and so the film holds together on a structural level. It helps thatEwan McGregor gives a halfway reasonable performance in them.
 
2014-08-04 10:36:33 AM  
If your earliest memory doesn't involve being 4 and going to see Return of The Jedi opening weekend with your dad and now deceased uncle, maybe the prequels are what you saw first.
 
2014-08-04 10:37:24 AM  

Delta1212: Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.


In and of itself it could have been a perfectly forgettable movie. Nothing great but not really bad either. The problem is that there is a decades spanning history of very hardcore fans. Even people who aren't fans, but who have seen the original trilogy, notice all kinds of idiotic ideas, starting with forcing every single person from the original trilogy (wait, was Solo in there?) into the damn movie. The over reliance on scenery and a lack of clear storied content.
 
2014-08-04 10:46:07 AM  
Most quotable movie ever.

Anakin "Are you an angel?"

 and the best line ever

Jar Jar "Icky-pooey"
 
2014-08-04 10:48:56 AM  

NEPAman: I am happy to know three things about the Star Wars universe.  The first is that we've seen only two-thirds of the overall story.


Actually, you saw the entire story in the original film.

The rest of it is just shiat added to make more money, though the second film was good.  That story that Lucas tells about the original story being too big to be just one film?  Bullshiat.  Too many inconsistencies in the films.

That whole "Episode IV" thing?  Just an homage to the Buck Rogers and Flash Gordon serials of the 1930's, nothing more.
 
2014-08-04 10:51:34 AM  
A generation that likes Phantom Menace.... Think of all the other crap movies that are better that could be high art for them: Batman & Robin, Howard The Duck, Superman IV, Battlefield Earth, Leonard Part 6, Battle Beyond the Stars.... the list goes on....
 
2014-08-04 10:53:45 AM  

HeartBurnKid: Gunny Highway: HeartBurnKid: Delta1212: Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.

I think it definitely suffers from inflated expectations simply for being a Star Wars film.

That said, it was still awful.

My friend got me free tickets to an Episode II screening.  Some guy came with a Jar Jar mask on  and he was attacked by people in the audience as he made his was to his seat.  The stopped him, pushed him against the rail, ripped his mask off, and stomped on it as a group.  The mask got torn and the kid, who wore the mask as a joke, was totally shaken up to the point that he didnt stay for the movie.

It was one of the craziest things I have ever seen.  It is silly but I could never really give a shiat about Star Wars after that.

Yeah, I could imagine that'd be pretty disturbing to watch.


The movie or the beat down ?
 
2014-08-04 10:56:31 AM  

HeartBurnKid: Gunny Highway: HeartBurnKid: Delta1212: Eh, it's not as bad enough to deserve the amount of derision it gets. That's about all I can say.

I think it definitely suffers from inflated expectations simply for being a Star Wars film.

That said, it was still awful.

My friend got me free tickets to an Episode II screening.  Some guy came with a Jar Jar mask on  and he was attacked by people in the audience as he made his was to his seat.  The stopped him, pushed him against the rail, ripped his mask off, and stomped on it as a group.  The mask got torn and the kid, who wore the mask as a joke, was totally shaken up to the point that he didnt stay for the movie.

It was one of the craziest things I have ever seen.  It is silly but I could never really give a shiat about Star Wars after that.

Yeah, I could imagine that'd be pretty disturbing to watch.


Plus, what they did to the Jar Jar guy, was probably pretty disturbing to watch, too.
 
2014-08-04 10:59:28 AM  

wildcardjack: If your earliest memory doesn't involve being 4 and going to see Return of The Jedi opening weekend with your dad and now deceased uncle, maybe the prequels are what you saw first.


Episode I was the first Star Wars movie that I saw in the theater, but I watched the original trilogy on VHS (recorded from TV broadcasts complete with vintage commercials) constantly as child.
 
2014-08-04 11:04:17 AM  
Yeah, the prequels sucked. On the other hand, I will always have a soft spot for Phantom, because it's the only movie I ever saw (in a theater) with my dad, who died in 2003.  Plus, dad was a minister (Yale Divinity School grad), and we had a great time on the way home discussing the whole hilarious "Baby Vader as Jesus" thing.
 
2014-08-04 11:06:52 AM  
HMS_Blinkin:

Now that I think about it, the podrace scene was much better---it was visually thrilling, but also had some background and consequences (the outcome of the race would determine whether Anakin could be free, and whether the heroes could repair their ship and leave Tattooine).

While certainly well-shot and thrilling, I always thought that the pod-race scene was a large waste of time that didn't really move the story forward, and that it only really served as an homage to Ben Hur.

Well, except that the Ben Hur chariot race made sense; the big Anakin comeback after his engine fails really made no sense in terms of how all that technology worked. It seems like if his pod worked like that, he should have no problems winning the race, even with the botched start.

It always seemed that the Jedi guys should be doing something, anything, other than hanging out and watching ESPN on their iPads during that whole thing. Like they should've been breaking into Jabba's compound for a spaceship part or something.

I think the one thing that TPM doesn't get credit for is having four independent-but-linked battle scenes going on at once at the end. Granted, you can argue how effective it was from a movie standpoint, but I think that's a fairly unique element to that film.
 
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