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(The Register)   Old news: Google spend millions on huge mysterious barges. New and exciting: Google scrap barges without ever saying what they were for   (theregister.co.uk) divider line 62
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3142 clicks; posted to Geek » on 04 Aug 2014 at 12:03 AM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-08-03 09:23:29 PM  
I thought it was clear they were survival platforms for the zombie apocalypse.
 
2014-08-03 09:43:11 PM  
Were there any big government spy scandals between the barges' creation and destruction? Just asking the question.
 
2014-08-03 09:49:19 PM  
I'm sure that we'll find out when their nanobot built armies rise from the waters where they were laid to create the succeeding generations...
 
2014-08-03 09:55:30 PM  
The barges have mysteriously vanished.

Or so they want you to believe.

What's really happening is that they're being retrofitted to coordinate logistics operations in concert with Amazon's drones.  This won't violate anti-trust law because Obama is a socialist.
 
2014-08-03 10:02:05 PM  

edmo: Were there any big government spy scandals between the barges' creation and destruction? Just asking the question.


I originally wondered if they were meant to be business platforms to be used in international waters to escape pesky "laws" - but instead they sounded like glorified apple stores.
 
2014-08-03 10:02:35 PM  
i.imgur.com

Sorry, Captain Gundotra, nobody's on board with that anymore.
 
2014-08-03 10:09:23 PM  

oi59.tinypic.com



RIP El DeBarge

 
2014-08-03 11:03:59 PM  

Lsherm: glorified apple stores


Well they used to store apples under water, so three you go.  It all makes sense.
 
2014-08-03 11:04:44 PM  

Twilight Farkle: [i.imgur.com image 570x238]

Sorry, Captain Gundotra, nobody's on board with that anymore.


Float it to Spain and call it "post Dali".
 
2014-08-03 11:41:36 PM  
"The first recipients of Google Glass were not as, how you say, fortunate as you may be led to believe. Entire batches of subjects needed to be kept far away from any populated areas. The best thing we could do for all mankind was to keep them in international waters, because traditional methods of disposal proved unsuccessful. Our benefactors have provided a solution to the problem recently that we are not at liberty to disclose. Be assured you are completely safe until sometime around 2017."
 
2014-08-04 12:14:50 AM  
Google has now entered its sinister "Phase Two" of operation.
 
2014-08-04 12:16:39 AM  
Must be nice to be able to just piss away money like that.
 
2014-08-04 12:20:44 AM  
Google wastes investors money.  News at 11.
 
2014-08-04 12:29:00 AM  
As I recall, Google had plans drawn up at one point to have water powered data centers on barges moored outside of large coastal areas. Supposedly, there would be a hydroelectric system of some sort inside which, when combined with an array of solar panels, would power the entire data center and not have to rely upon electricity generated from fossil fuels. When word of this first came out I wondered if it was more than a pipe dream and was in the process of being implemented. Could be that is what was going on and it didn't pan out the way they thought it would.
 
2014-08-04 12:31:10 AM  
Meanwhile, at that submarine base every underwater spy movie has...
 
2014-08-04 12:38:44 AM  
The conspiracy theories about this were the best part.
 
2014-08-04 12:49:18 AM  

TheXerox: As I recall, Google had plans drawn up at one point to have water powered data centers on barges moored outside of large coastal areas. Supposedly, there would be a hydroelectric system of some sort inside which, when combined with an array of solar panels, would power the entire data center and not have to rely upon electricity generated from fossil fuels. When word of this first came out I wondered if it was more than a pipe dream and was in the process of being implemented. Could be that is what was going on and it didn't pan out the way they thought it would.


I wonder if this didn't have something to do with their "Bring Internet everywhere" initiative. Seems like offshore barge data centers might have been replaced with the flying weather-balloon internet.
 
2014-08-04 12:53:38 AM  
How do we know they didn't succeed in their mission?  We never knew for sure what Google was really up to...
 
2014-08-04 12:54:08 AM  
They were illegally dumping old toxic YouTube comments.
 
2014-08-04 01:13:47 AM  
They're putting nanobots into the scrap metal recovery cycle. Your next car will be driverless - after it chokes you with a self-tensioning seatbelt.
 
2014-08-04 01:16:31 AM  
I think this was the guys who run Google just farking with us.  They're billionaires and in need of entertainment, so they trolled the entire country.
 
2014-08-04 01:18:30 AM  
They're smuggling barges.  Disguised as barges.

"Follow the barges."

"Twas barges killed the beast."

"Use the barge, Luke."

Barges.

// Got nuthin'
 
2014-08-04 01:19:28 AM  
So there will soon be a serious drop in missing person reports?
 
2014-08-04 01:25:37 AM  
They probably had some experimental plan for it, but they decided to ditch it and cut their losses. Meh, stuff happens.
 
2014-08-04 01:50:55 AM  
They were going to build a floating Raft city from which they'd launch their Babylonian neurolinguistic virus on the population.  Duh.
 
2014-08-04 02:04:19 AM  
I blame Captain America.
 
2014-08-04 02:08:13 AM  

Mad_Radhu: I blame Captain America.


What, because he's black now?
 
2014-08-04 02:13:03 AM  

TheXerox: As I recall, Google had plans drawn up at one point to have water powered cooled data centers on barges moored outside of large coastal areas.


FTFY

IIRC they wanted to moor them in the calm waters of the South Bay but much of it is protected wetlands and the heated water they'd produce probably didn't pass Environmental Impact review. It's not a bad idea for cooling just the wrong location.
 
2014-08-04 02:32:18 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org
"They had a large barge with an antenna on top they would charge up a discharge...They had a large barge with an antenna on top they would charge up a discharge  ..."
 
2014-08-04 02:45:37 AM  

BlackKaiser: [upload.wikimedia.org image 300x300]
"They had a large barge with an antenna on top they would charge up a discharge...They had a large barge with an antenna on top they would charge up a discharge  ..."


Tell 'em large barge sent ya!
 
2014-08-04 03:14:32 AM  
check their recent patent filing (amongst the mountain that they already have)

could have been a partly baked idea that didnt quite pan out, but no point in giving anything away that could be competetion
could be any of the random other guesses

floating, water-cooled has some entertainment value

mobile advertisements and offshore wifi are two of the more entertaining ones
 
2014-08-04 03:30:04 AM  
I bet they were used for google orgies.
 
2014-08-04 04:13:50 AM  

Old Man Winter: They were illegally dumping old toxic YouTube comments.


They're going to need bigger boats....
 
2014-08-04 04:32:20 AM  

namatad: idea that didnt quite pan out


Or maybe it did, and they just needed the barges for proof of concept.
 
2014-08-04 04:54:48 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-08-04 04:55:41 AM  
They didn't need their stinking barges.
 
2014-08-04 04:59:59 AM  
Sadly what's really going on is pretty boring.  The glass division has a new GM.  The barges were just something left over from whomever was running it previously and the new GM decided these barges were the wrong way to go about promoting the product. So instead of throwing good money after bad they're selling them off. Big waste but google can afford it.

A zombie haven would have been much more fun.
 
2014-08-04 05:40:31 AM  
Someone had a great idea and then the drugs wore off or they sobered up.
 
2014-08-04 05:43:24 AM  
I was so hoping it was going to be the modern eras version of pirate radio.
 
2014-08-04 06:03:54 AM  
This just in: when empirical results show an experimental system isn't viable, it's permitted to cut your losses rather than doubling down.

Most R&D ddoesn't pan out, hence the 'research' part of the name
 
2014-08-04 07:09:28 AM  
Must be nice to have so much cash on hand that you can waste it on giant floating barges.
 
2014-08-04 07:17:39 AM  
I've just been sitting here cynically wondering if it wasn't all just a boring, prosaic experiment in avoiding property taxes.

/"No, we're not IN Portland, Maine, we're just floating near there..."
 
2014-08-04 07:18:35 AM  
Poor impulse control.
 
2014-08-04 07:29:15 AM  
We do t need no stinking Barges!!!!
 
2014-08-04 09:23:33 AM  

Close2TheEdge: Must be nice to have so much cash on hand that you can waste it on giant floating barges.


I suspect that's true, but I can't confirm it  without having large amounts of cash. My grant application will be forthcoming.
 
2014-08-04 09:26:55 AM  
Nice boats.
 
2014-08-04 09:31:42 AM  
Scrapped? Or transferred to a big DARPA black budget facility in the Antarctic! WAKE UP, SHEEPLE!
 
2014-08-04 09:32:48 AM  

Close2TheEdge: Must be nice to have so much cash on hand that you can waste it on giant floating barges.


Better than wasting it on giant sinking barges.
 
2014-08-04 09:40:57 AM  
daylightwebsites.com

We don't need no stinkin barges
 
2014-08-04 09:55:46 AM  
They can't just barge in there like they own the place!
 
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