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(The New York Times)   Procter & Gamble to axe 100 slow-selling brands. People outraged that they can no longer buy Qwent, Fleem, Sprif, Zplog, or Grenk in 3....2   (nytimes.com ) divider line
    More: PSA, April, Procter & Gamble, pet foods, global strategy, Duracell, offers, net sales  
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2805 clicks; posted to Business » on 01 Aug 2014 at 8:48 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-08-01 05:29:30 PM  
Fleem is the best gredunza cleaner out there.... What will I do now?
 
2014-08-01 05:37:20 PM  
the guys at Mad would be proud of your naming skills, subby!
 
2014-08-01 05:38:48 PM  

markie_farkie: Fleem is the best gredunza cleaner out there.... What will I do now?



They tried to turn its flammability into a selling point, but it was a losing cause.
www.kebointernational.com
 
2014-08-01 06:18:20 PM  
As long as I can still get Tang any time I want it...
 
2014-08-01 08:39:54 PM  
I read about this last June in a Church of Satan bulletin.
 
2014-08-01 09:21:50 PM  
Et tu, Zud?
 
2014-08-01 09:51:36 PM  
Still cant find Dapper Dan around here... Tried to order some and the guy at the counter said itd take two weeks.
 
2014-08-01 09:56:41 PM  

Hack Patooey: Still cant find Dapper Dan around here... Tried to order some and the guy at the counter said itd take two weeks.


We do have Fop...
 
2014-08-01 10:03:31 PM  
Here's an incomplete list, if you want to start speculating...
 
2014-08-01 10:27:09 PM  

Goimir: Hack Patooey: Still cant find Dapper Dan around here... Tried to order some and the guy at the counter said itd take two weeks.

We do have Fop...


Well, I don't want Fop, goddamn it! I'm a Dapper Dan man!
 
2014-08-01 10:27:59 PM  
But Queef is still going to be available, correct?
 
2014-08-01 10:35:09 PM  
You can still buy Spliff

/in some states, anyway
 
2014-08-01 10:35:13 PM  
It didn't look like a one horse town, but try to get a good hair jelly.
 
2014-08-01 10:39:44 PM  
dilbert.com
 
2014-08-01 11:17:52 PM  
This is like a Reggie Perrin joke come to life...
 
2014-08-02 12:14:22 AM  
Goodbye Krebstar products

img.photobucket.com
I'm gonna miss Krebduds and KrebinUp most of all .
 
2014-08-02 12:17:05 AM  
Unfortunately I don't think their "we viciously abuse bunny rabbits so you can smell nice" brands are going anywhere.  Farking monsters.
 
2014-08-02 12:38:19 AM  
Darren Rovell must be devastated right now. #BrandMassacre
 
2014-08-02 02:41:33 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Here's an incomplete list, if you want to start speculating...


That list of current brands only lists 77 by my quick count. I wonder how many brands they actually have. I wonder how many brands they keep exclusive to other markets. I see a distinct lack of unfamiliar names I expect in a multinational's brand portfolio.
 
2014-08-02 07:35:02 AM  
Salvo - detergent tablets
 
2014-08-02 08:46:25 AM  
They can start by getting rid of all the bullshiat varieties of Tide and just keep Tide Original. We don't need 'fresh breeze', 'april shower', 'lilac', 'lavender scent', or any of the other crap 'scents'. The point of clean clothes is that they are clean and DON'T smell.

/and you can stop with the 20 blade razors, too
 
2014-08-02 09:39:00 AM  

Goimir: Hack Patooey: Still cant find Dapper Dan around here... Tried to order some and the guy at the counter said itd take two weeks.

We do have Fop...


Finest in the shop.
 
2014-08-02 10:44:38 AM  

MappingChick: This is like a Reggie Perrin joke come to life...


I didn't get where I am today by always saying I didn't get where I am today.

/great , super.
 
2014-08-02 11:47:19 AM  
They do this about once a decade. Then forget why. And have to do it again 10-15 years later. The paradox of choice, brand dilution, etc. There doesn't need to be 25 different versions of Tide.
 
2014-08-02 12:18:12 PM  

wildcardjack: They do this about once a decade. Then forget why. And have to do it again 10-15 years later. The paradox of choice, brand dilution, etc. There doesn't need to be 25 different versions of Tide.


I have never understood the whole thing about 25 different scents that all smell largely the same.  I use Purex crystals for when I want scent (sheets, for example), and they are fantastic.  Plus, I control how strong the scent is.  I don't understand why they don't all just sell detergent colour and scent free and sell the scents separately.
 
2014-08-02 12:32:05 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: wildcardjack: They do this about once a decade. Then forget why. And have to do it again 10-15 years later. The paradox of choice, brand dilution, etc. There doesn't need to be 25 different versions of Tide.

I have never understood the whole thing about 25 different scents that all smell largely the same.  I use Purex crystals for when I want scent (sheets, for example), and they are fantastic.  Plus, I control how strong the scent is.  I don't understand why they don't all just sell detergent colour and scent free and sell the scents separately.


I read before that you can get away with using about half the recommended detergent quantity with your laundry.  Granted, my clothes don't get any more sweaty/gross than may be created by a nice brisk walk around the neighborhood in the mild 95 degree Texas evening, but I've found that half the recommended detergent works just fine for me.  I save money, and my clothes don't reek of April Dawn Meadow Fresh or whatever.  Win-win.
 
2014-08-02 01:44:55 PM  
My sister created Torangos corn chips for P&G so I am getting a kick out of this.
 
2014-08-02 03:39:06 PM  
Never got over discontinuation of Gleem:

img2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-08-02 03:59:43 PM  
Those aren't cleaning products...those are typographical errors.  (Considering that P&G sold off
brands like Jif, Spic & Span, Oxydol, Duncan Hines, Folgers....but kept Fleem (not Gleem?),
Zplog, Qwent....did those brands ever actually exist?.....that's sad.)
 
2014-08-02 05:19:46 PM  
RIP Slurm

img2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-08-02 06:59:56 PM  

DigitalCoffee: They can start by getting rid of all the bullshiat varieties of Tide and just keep Tide Original. We don't need 'fresh breeze', 'april shower', 'lilac', 'lavender scent', or any of the other crap 'scents'. The point of clean clothes is that they are clean and DON'T smell.
/and you can stop with the 20 blade razors, too


Hear hear. I can't even find what kind of Tide I want anymore in the store, it takes too long. So I stopped buying Tide.

Prescription drug names are even better.

GABAPENTIN (GABAPENTIN)
GABITRIL (TIAGABINE HYDROCHLORIDE)
GABLOFEN (BACLOFEN)
GADAVIST (GADOBUTROL)
GALANTAMINE HYDROBROMIDE (GALANTAMINE HYDROBROMIDE)
GALLIUM CITRATE GA 67 (GALLIUM CITRATE GA-67)
GALZIN (ZINC ACETATE)
GAMENE (LINDANE)
GAMOPHEN (HEXACHLOROPHENE)
GANCICLOVIR (GANCICLOVIR)
GANCICLOVIR (GANCICLOVIR SODIUM)
GANCICLOVIR SODIUM (GANCICLOVIR SODIUM)
GANIRELIX ACETATE (GANIRELIX ACETATE)
GANITE (GALLIUM NITRATE)
GANTANOL (SULFAMETHOXAZOLE)
GANTANOL-DS (SULFAMETHOXAZOLE)
GANTRISIN (SULFISOXAZOLE)
GANTRISIN (SULFISOXAZOLE ACETYL)
GANTRISIN (SULFISOXAZOLE DIOLAMINE)
GANTRISIN PEDIATRIC (SULFISOXAZOLE ACETYL)
GARAMYCIN (GENTAMICIN SULFATE)
GASTROCROM (CROMOLYN SODIUM)
GASTROGRAFIN (DIATRIZOATE MEGLUMINE; DIATRIZOATE SODIUM)
GASTROMARK (FERUMOXSIL)
GASTROVIST (DIATRIZOATE MEGLUMINE; DIATRIZOATE SODIUM)
GATIFLOXACIN (GATIFLOXACIN)
GATTEX KIT (TEDUGLUTIDE RECOMBINANT)
GAVISCON (ALUMINUM HYDROXIDE; MAGNESIUM TRISILICATE)
GAZYVA (OBINUTUZUMAB)
GELNIQUE (OXYBUTYNIN CHLORIDE)
GELNIQUE 3% (OXYBUTYNIN)
GEMCITABINE (GEMCITABINE)
GEMCITABINE HYDROCHLORIDE (GEMCITABINE HYDROCHLORIDE)
GEMFIB
 
2014-08-02 10:06:45 PM  
My father works for P&G. It's ASTONISHING the amount of shiat they make. Twice a year (Christmas, and in the summer as well) they do a big "giveaway" of outdated/inappropriately labeled/overrun/etc. products to their employees. Every year he ends up with a multi-year supply of those stupid Tide ball things, a shiatload of regular Tide, a metric shiatload of Duracell AA batteries (lovingly packaged in ziplock baggies because they're they split up the industrial bulk-packs to do it), shiatlaods of dog and cat food, and a cornucopia of other assorted random shiat.

One year, we got these farking bizarre Mexican-market (as in the labels were clearly intended for Mexico) triangular Pringles knockoffs. Imagine all the inconvenience of Pringles (can't reach your hand into the can to get them) made worse by making the can TRIANGULAR.

I'm certain they have 100 brands they can kill without anyone ever noticing.
 
2014-08-02 10:53:23 PM  
 
2014-08-03 01:25:49 AM  

Weng: My father works for P&G. It's ASTONISHING the amount of shiat they make. Twice a year (Christmas, and in the summer as well) they do a big "giveaway" of outdated/inappropriately labeled/overrun/etc. products to their employees. Every year he ends up with a multi-year supply of those stupid Tide ball things, a shiatload of regular Tide, a metric shiatload of Duracell AA batteries (lovingly packaged in ziplock baggies because they're they split up the industrial bulk-packs to do it), shiatlaods of dog and cat food, and a cornucopia of other assorted random shiat.

One year, we got these farking bizarre Mexican-market (as in the labels were clearly intended for Mexico) triangular Pringles knockoffs. Imagine all the inconvenience of Pringles (can't reach your hand into the can to get them) made worse by making the can TRIANGULAR.



This is because of the well-known Mexican taboo regarding reaching into holes or cylinders. It's their greatest fear. Surely you must have heard the legend of Julio y el agujero,  or   El cuento del alcance miedo de Juanita en un cilindro del Infierno .Perhaps you've only heard of  El monstruo agujero que chupa la sangre a través de las uñas,a popular and much-feared legendary creature found south of the border.

/Julio and the Hole
//The Tale of Juanita's scary reach Into a Cylinder of Hell

///The hole monster who sucks blood through your fingernails
 
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