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(Yahoo)   "Who would take Edmonton Oilers MDMA, and be perpetually waiting for it to kick in? Or Ottawa Senators meth, which costs half what it did three years ago and is one-fourth as effective? Or Maple Leafs mushrooms, an Ontario fungus growing since 1967?"   ( sports.yahoo.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Canadiens, Michel Emond, Scott Gomez, Ryan McDonagh, New Hampshire, illegal narcotics, Maple Leafs  
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796 clicks; posted to Sports » on 01 Aug 2014 at 4:14 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



29 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-08-01 02:55:15 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org

Pittsburgh Pirates LSD FTW.
 
2014-08-01 04:17:19 PM  
Well at least it isnt like Capitals meth almost gets you there and lets you down before it kicks in if it kicks in at all.
 
2014-08-01 04:24:05 PM  
You would need to be on molly just to handle living in a shiatehole like Edmonton.
 
2014-08-01 04:28:50 PM  
Something, something, Paulina Gretzky cocaine, something something.
 
2014-08-01 04:34:54 PM  
Sharks crack: Gets you almost but not quite as high as you want to be every time

Coyotes menopause hormones: Makes all the old coonts constantly biatch about how it is too daned hot for Hockey there

Flyers: pruno
 
2014-08-01 04:39:02 PM  
Something, something, San Jose Sharks, something, something, premature ejaculation.

/not Canada, but needed to be said
//Great for the first 7 months of the season
 
2014-08-01 04:50:10 PM  
Most people only have two Grams.
 
2014-08-01 05:02:21 PM  

andychrist420: Something, something, San Jose Sharks, something, something, premature ejaculation.

/not Canada, but needed to be said
//Great for the first 7 months of the season


Good for 7 months then fails catastrophically, leaving life long mental and emotional scarring?  What is the drug called they use to perform late term abortions?  (quick google search...)  Ah, The San Jose Sharks Digoxin.
 
2014-08-01 05:15:47 PM  

mikaloyd: Sharks crack: Gets you almost but not quite as high as you want to be every time


In my experience, that just sounds like regular cocaine. The biggest side effect of coke is "I WANT MORE COKE"
 
2014-08-01 05:37:49 PM  

abmoraz: andychrist420: Something, something, San Jose Sharks, something, something, premature ejaculation.

/not Canada, but needed to be said
//Great for the first 7 months of the season

Good for 7 months then fails catastrophically, leaving life long mental and emotional scarring?  What is the drug called they use to perform late term abortions?  (quick google search...)  Ah, The San Jose Sharks Digoxin.


I thought that was called Planned Parenthood.  Maybe that's the generic name.
 
2014-08-01 05:39:52 PM  
I've been taking the San Jose Sharks Playoffs Suicide Pill for a decade and even that doesn't work when it counts.
 
2014-08-01 05:46:33 PM  

MFAWG: Something, something, Paulina Gretzky cocaine, something something.


She seems to fit the stereotype.

Not surprised she was blowing rails with Dustin.
 
2014-08-01 05:54:11 PM  
It's a cool idea but I don't need NHL-branded drugs.

Why? Because I'm drinking Red Wings, they give you bull.
 
2014-08-01 05:56:51 PM  
I'm just happy for a mid-summer hockey thread.  I had to have some goon juice in celebration.
 
2014-08-01 05:58:53 PM  

LibertyHiller: It's a cool idea but I don't need NHL-branded drugs.

Why? Because I'm drinking Red Wings, they give you bull.


Or a messy mouth a few days a month.
 
2014-08-01 06:00:00 PM  

andychrist420: I'm just happy for a mid-summer hockey thread.  I had to have some goon juice in celebration.


I'll be doing that later.

Did it the other day. Very refreshing.
 
2014-08-01 06:14:54 PM  

fatalvenom: MFAWG: Something, something, Paulina Gretzky cocaine, something something.

She seems to fit the stereotype.

Not surprised she was blowing rails with Dustin.


I'm guessing the cocaine was less of a problem than banging other players wives, which sounds about right.
 
2014-08-01 06:23:16 PM  

MFAWG: fatalvenom: MFAWG: Something, something, Paulina Gretzky cocaine, something something.

She seems to fit the stereotype.

Not surprised she was blowing rails with Dustin.

I'm guessing the cocaine was less of a problem than banging other players wives, which sounds about right.


I have a feeling Paulina was in on that as well.
 
2014-08-01 06:45:35 PM  

fatalvenom: MFAWG: fatalvenom: MFAWG: Something, something, Paulina Gretzky cocaine, something something.

She seems to fit the stereotype.

Not surprised she was blowing rails with Dustin.

I'm guessing the cocaine was less of a problem than banging other players wives, which sounds about right.

I have a feeling Paulina was in on that as well.


That's a good visual!
 
2014-08-01 07:25:59 PM  

Gaylord Q. Tinkledink: You would need to be on molly just to handle living in a shiatehole like Edmonton.


Weak... Just like the laffs
 
2014-08-01 07:38:11 PM  
Those Maple Leaf mushrooms make you feel great in September and October, but by April you're suicidal.
 
2014-08-01 07:43:44 PM  

bingethinker: Those Maple Leaf mushrooms make you feel great in September and October, but by April you're suicidal.


As a Leafs fan, I can confirm that this is indeed how I feel. Course, I am also in retail, so after all the holidays wrap up in April, I'm also ready to kill someone.
 
2014-08-01 08:00:25 PM  
How about St Louis Blues placebo?  You take it and wait for forty years and nothing happens.
 
2014-08-01 08:02:41 PM  
I guess Quebec City is Peyote then.

You take it, then get up in the middle of the night and leave town, move to Colorado, and never ever again talk to the family and friends you left back in Quebec.
 
2014-08-01 08:08:44 PM  
2001 Final game 7 is on NHL Network right now. Not only do I get to have mixed emotions about Bourque winning a Cup with the notBruins, I at least get to lay back and listen to the beautiful tones of Gary Thorne and Bill Clement.

Such a treat.
 
2014-08-01 10:02:46 PM  
As a Bruins fan, watching the P.K. Subban arbitration show has been farking fantastic fun. If Bergevin lets him walk, well, I'll not be shedding a tear in my non-craptastic non-Canadian beer this summer. Because if I learned anything from visiting Montreal this past June, besides the quality and friendliness of the ladies up there and the near infinite density of Starbucks in the downtown area, is that Canada really does have shiat beer. Blue, blanc, et rouge, your beer sucked.

/La fin du monde is a shiatty belgian too.
 
2014-08-01 10:35:35 PM  

soopey: As a Bruins fan, watching the P.K. Subban arbitration show has been farking fantastic fun. If Bergevin lets him walk, well, I'll not be shedding a tear in my non-craptastic non-Canadian beer this summer. Because if I learned anything from visiting Montreal this past June, besides the quality and friendliness of the ladies up there and the near infinite density of Starbucks in the downtown area, is that Canada really does have shiat beer. Blue, blanc, et rouge, your beer sucked.

/La fin du monde is a shiatty belgian too.


Some of our beer does suck. What brands were you drinking?
 
2014-08-02 12:03:34 PM  

soopey: As a Bruins fan, watching the P.K. Subban arbitration show has been farking fantastic fun. If Bergevin lets him walk, well, I'll not be shedding a tear in my non-craptastic non-Canadian beer this summer. Because if I learned anything from visiting Montreal this past June, besides the quality and friendliness of the ladies up there and the near infinite density of Starbucks in the downtown area, is that Canada really does have shiat beer. Blue, blanc, et rouge, your beer sucked.

/La fin du monde is a shiatty belgian too.


Pretty big talk from a Sam Adams drinker. But big talk is what bruins fans are all about.
 
2014-08-02 05:46:43 PM  
PK gets $9 Million (is that in Canadian money?) a year for 8 years. $72 M total.

Wow.

And beer:
Molson, Moosehead, Labatte, Les 3 Brasseurs, other random "Blanc" and "Blonde" beers.

Sam Adams, hath no hold on me. My favorite local brewery is Smuttynose!
 
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