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(Kottke)   Have you given your smartphone, computer or network an actual name? Survey finds most people have, "and sweet Jesus, are those themes nerdy." Anyway, share your own here   (kottke.org) divider line 50
    More: Misc, Tim Carmody, disk enclosure, other people, David Foster Wallace, Don Quixote  
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377 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 31 Jul 2014 at 10:43 AM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-07-31 07:35:15 AM  
zraewqvtytumnkljo
 
2014-07-31 08:33:48 AM  
Old wireless network name was FBI Surveillance Van #42. New wireless network name is NSA Surveillance Van #42.

I try to stay current.
 
2014-07-31 08:37:18 AM  
I name my computers after Middle Earth geography. There's been Sirion, Valinor, Moria, and Osgiliath.
 
2014-07-31 08:40:09 AM  
My cell phone is named "Not Again"
 
2014-07-31 08:43:20 AM  
My network is "Blast Hardcheese."
 
2014-07-31 08:44:37 AM  
My network is Cygnus X-1 and all of the devices connected to are named after Rush albums/songs.
 
2014-07-31 09:08:00 AM  
My Network is Generals. The machines are named after famous generals of antiquity and the American Civil War.
 
2014-07-31 09:11:29 AM  
The wireless network is named after stars or constellations: EtaCarinae, Cassiopeia, etc.
 
2014-07-31 09:14:15 AM  
Our devices were HAL, Holly, Deep Thought, Queeg (backup)...
 
2014-07-31 09:23:20 AM  
Wireless network is Leprosy Fart.
 
2014-07-31 09:37:19 AM  
Best wireless network name I ever saw was:

Uncle Touchy's Rape Van
 
2014-07-31 09:52:44 AM  
My wifi network during the World Cup was named USAUSAUSA
 
2014-07-31 10:01:48 AM  
At work, the desktop at the front desk is named "FRONTDESK". The one at the side desk is named "SIDEDESK". The rest use the same theme.

At home I have two desktops and a laptop. One PC is named "WIN7" the other "WINXP", for reasons I'm sure you can figure out. The laptop is "LAPTOP"

My phone is "[my first name]'s" iPhone. My wife's is "[her first name]'s iPhone]". He tablet is "[her first name]'s iPad".

/KISS
 
2014-07-31 10:02:55 AM  

Gecko Gingrich: "[my first name]'s" iPhone"

 
2014-07-31 10:07:59 AM  
Does "farking thing" count as a name?  I usually say "Where did I leave the farking thing" several times a day.

/old Ennuipoet is old.
//Where are my glasses
///Get off my lawn
 
2014-07-31 10:10:14 AM  
Rename your (D:) drive "She wants the"
 
2014-07-31 10:16:01 AM  
My computer is "Mothership", the rest are named after the people who use them on my home network for easy identification. I've never named my smartphone.
 
2014-07-31 10:18:26 AM  
Oh, my network is a boring "hotspotone" but when I move I may update it to be more clever.

In my son's first apartment, his landlord thought his roommate was sketchy due to a possession arrest for pot, so I named their wifi "totallyNOTdealingdrugs" but when they moved to another apartment (to get away from nosey landlord) their new wifi is "$20-4-PW-Apt101".
 
2014-07-31 10:27:11 AM  

HawgWild: My network is "Blast Hardcheese."



Very good.  You have a lot of faith in your network then?
 
2014-07-31 10:29:58 AM  
My network name is:  655321


There's a couple in my building that are good:

"Virus Infected"
"Virus Infected Guest"
 
2014-07-31 11:09:05 AM  
My phone is "Charles Barkley's Phone" so when I get a rental car and it saves the list of names on its Bluetooth connections, the next guy thinks he has a car Charles Barkley used.
 
2014-07-31 11:21:51 AM  
All of my computers, routers, phones, digital clocks, cameras, thermostats, remote controls have memberships in the ACM.

i.imgur.com

Not the modem though. farking CenturyLink can pay for that.
 
2014-07-31 11:34:34 AM  
The servers in one building here are named after hobbits.  BILBO was having bizarre networking/DNS resolution issues (among other things), so I ...uh... sent it to live with the elves.

/it was easier building it from scratch than fiddling with it
 
2014-07-31 11:52:06 AM  
Been naming my computers using the Greek alphabet, only up to Gamma since I started
 
2014-07-31 11:53:52 AM  
My network is LANcaster (that's the name of my street)
 
2014-07-31 12:10:52 PM  
"Notwork."
 
2014-07-31 12:35:05 PM  

Rev.K: Best wireless network name I ever saw was:

Uncle Touchy's Rape Van


Someone in my parent's neighbourhood has the wireless network name "2 Girls 1 Router".
And I won't tell my 80-year-old Mom why I laugh at that.
 
2014-07-31 12:47:50 PM  
A lot of people name their computers, networks, and hard drives after characters, places, and objects from Star Wars. Like, a lot of them.

The place I used to work, someone got cute and named all of the servers after Matrix characters. That's fun and all, but when you're trying to remember that Malachi is the email server, the BB server is on Cleo, and the file server is named Neo, it gets to be a PITA.

GoldDude: Rev.K: Best wireless network name I ever saw was:

Uncle Touchy's Rape Van

Someone in my parent's neighbourhood has the wireless network name "2 Girls 1 Router".
And I won't tell my 80-year-old Mom why I laugh at that.


A few months ago, I decided that when I get my new router, I'm going to hook the current one up as a dummy, just to get a name theme going. Since the current one is weak sauce, and I'm getting the new one for a better signal, I'll be able to get them to show up in order, so I'm going to name them like this:

(Router 1) I Like Big Butts
(Router 2) And I Cannot Lie


/2 Girls 1 Router is one of the best I've heard of, top 5 at least.
 
2014-07-31 12:54:33 PM  
Ever since I had a Mac SE with a startup sound from Cat On A Hot Tin Roof, "Maggie the cat is alive. I'm alive!", my main computer has been named Maggie.
 
2014-07-31 12:59:51 PM  
My home computer is "Old as Dell"

At work, our servers are all Disney characters:  Aladdin, Nemo, Buzz, Ariel, Dory
 
2014-07-31 01:28:14 PM  
My wireless network is "Teletraan"

My windows laptop is "Blaster"

My fedora laptop is "vectorsigma"

Not named my smartphone or kindle though. They're just whatever the defaults are.
 
2014-07-31 01:28:25 PM  
Network is "stop trying to steal my internet"

Nest thermostat is "Hal"

Old network was "downloading porn don't use this one"
 
2014-07-31 01:33:21 PM  
I named my first two networked computers Pulsar and Quasar. Two laptops were added together and became Radar and Sonar. Then came a test rig that circled around under the name Telstar. Finally my new main rig was named Oscar because it sounded better than anything I could come up with with a U. This was all on a wired network, so no wifi access points to name.

Oscar and Telstar were the ones that went with me when I left my parents' house. But I gave up naming my new computers that way. Part of the reason is that I couldn't pick my own name for my work laptops anyway. My last two machines even share the same name, which isn't convenient at all if I need to access the old one from the new one.
 
2014-07-31 01:52:14 PM  
Wifi network is PonderWi.  Other than that everything very boring- I suspect people come in two varieties, those that give names to lots of inanimate objects and those that will only do it with ships.  The only name I give to objects is "you farking piece of junk" which I tend to use for everything from computers to cars to telescopes.
 
2014-07-31 02:12:57 PM  

apt311: My home computer is "Old as Dell"

At work, our servers are all Disney characters:  Aladdin, Nemo, Buzz, Ariel, Dory


Just keep pinging, just keep pinging, just keep pinging, pinging

What do we do? we ping....
 
2014-07-31 02:16:38 PM  
I named mine Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfernschpleden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-don gle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolen sic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-ku rstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-nurnburger-bratwust le-gerspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shonendanker-kal bsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.
 
2014-07-31 02:39:42 PM  
my home network SSID is "Lord of the Pings"

one of my neighbor's networks is "Abraham Linksys" which earns a chuckle anytime it comes up on a wifi scan
 
2014-07-31 05:07:56 PM  
Not saying.
But my honeypot is NetgearMR814_802.11b.
 
2014-07-31 05:55:08 PM  
My phone's network is named "Wireless Spectrum Dash" off of Rainbow Dash.

My wifi used to be named "Chargin mah laz0r".
 
2014-07-31 09:59:32 PM  

turboke: I named my first two networked computers Pulsar and Quasar. Two laptops were added together and became Radar and Sonar. Then came a test rig that circled around under the name Telstar. Finally my new main rig was named Oscar because it sounded better than anything I could come up with with a U. This was all on a wired network, so no wifi access points to name.

Oscar and Telstar were the ones that went with me when I left my parents' house. But I gave up naming my new computers that way. Part of the reason is that I couldn't pick my own name for my work laptops anyway. My last two machines even share the same name, which isn't convenient at all if I need to access the old one from the new one.


For the next one you can use "Nascar".

I named my hard drive "C".
 
2014-07-31 10:01:00 PM  
HugItOut
 
2014-07-31 10:40:50 PM  
The wireless is FortressOfUltimateDarkness
 
2014-07-31 11:08:16 PM  
My computer is Loki.  Previous ones have been Asphodel and Sheba.

My last network was Viper Mad.  The current network is random letters.

My Diablo III characters are spoooon! (a wizard), fred (female demon hunter) and grape (monk)

My iPods are Bob and Mike (good on you if you catch the reference)

I've never named my phone.
 
2014-07-31 11:30:45 PM  
The WIFI is Lurknet and all the devices/pcs are named after movie robots - NAS Box = Bishop, Desktops = C3P0 and Twiki, Phones = Eva and Wall-e, Laptop = R2D2 etc...
 
2014-08-01 12:11:09 AM  
I like names that go well after the word "on" so you can say things like

"I backed up the file on Purpose"

"I think the source for that is on Drugs"

"look for it on Tuesday"
 
2014-08-01 02:05:36 AM  
My 5.8 GHz network is named 'Carlos Danger', and my 2.4 GHz network is called 'Weedlord Bonerhitler'
 
2014-08-01 03:40:09 AM  

with great power comes great insanity: turboke: I named my first two networked computers Pulsar and Quasar. Two laptops were added together and became Radar and Sonar. Then came a test rig that circled around under the name Telstar. Finally my new main rig was named Oscar because it sounded better than anything I could come up with with a U. This was all on a wired network, so no wifi access points to name.

Oscar and Telstar were the ones that went with me when I left my parents' house. But I gave up naming my new computers that way. Part of the reason is that I couldn't pick my own name for my work laptops anyway. My last two machines even share the same name, which isn't convenient at all if I need to access the old one from the new one.

For the next one you can use "Nascar".

I named my hard drive "C".


I hadn't read any Lovecraft back then. I now realize I should have named the network Ulthar so nobody would be allowed to harm any CAT.

HairBolus: I like names that go well after the word "on" so you can say things like

"I backed up the file on Purpose"

"I think the source for that is on Drugs"

"look for it on Tuesday"


My brother's external hard drive's name is a Dutch colloquialism that means 'cooch'. "How do you want me to send these photos?" "Just put'em in my cooch." (It works better in Dutch: "Steek ze maar in mijn foefke.")
 
2014-08-01 09:19:48 AM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: Nest thermostat is "Hal"


Heh, mine is as well.
 
2014-08-01 09:28:43 AM  

UberDave: My network name is:  655321


There's a couple in my building that are good:

"Virus Infected"
"Virus Infected Guest"


Mine is named "Virus Downloader".
 
2014-08-01 08:22:27 PM  
I live in a college town, with miles and miles of cheap apartment housing. Amusing WiFi names are almost an art-form here. I love scrolling the detectable networks with my iPhone any time I walk past an apartment block. I live smack in the middle of the closest thing this town has to a "hood", and I'm the only 2 story building in sight, so mine is "sweet death from above"
 
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