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(Metro)   Jumped on trampoline, bruised penis   (metro.co.uk) divider line 31
    More: Amusing, trampolines, tables  
•       •       •

5741 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jul 2014 at 10:18 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-07-29 08:00:04 PM  
I just came back from house sitting Sunday, so I'm getting a kick.
 
2014-07-29 08:01:51 PM  
Ow, my penis?

It begins.
 
2014-07-29 08:08:53 PM  
Soap is the tipoff. You have to keep an eye on them. They'd pull it all off soon enough except for the soap.

Check your Post office.
 
2014-07-29 10:21:31 PM  
Reddit leaks onto Fark again. I love it.
 
2014-07-29 10:21:58 PM  
How many people will this go through before they realize it's a joke?
 
2014-07-29 10:23:12 PM  
You think it's just a joke?

/off to hide my soap
 
2014-07-29 10:26:56 PM  
I've done some pretty heinous things with my penis and have never bruised it.
 
2014-07-29 10:27:01 PM  
That was awesome.  The bruised penis statement wasn't even the funniest part.
 
2014-07-29 10:27:31 PM  

Buttknuckle: I've done some pretty heinous things with my penis and have never bruised it.


Even jumped on a few tramps with it!
 
2014-07-29 10:38:33 PM  
That was a very good list. Like Adrian Mole was house sitting.
 
2014-07-29 10:39:45 PM  
I like the guy's style. I laughed at the pelicans being in on the soap conspiracy. I should throw in a few things like that when I leave notes to the teachers that I substitute for.
 
2014-07-29 10:40:19 PM  
The words "Bruised Penis" should never be appearing next to the Amusing tag.
 
2014-07-29 10:41:29 PM  
They know about the soap‽  shiat now I've got to rehide it all!
 
2014-07-29 10:48:47 PM  
Still counts as sex???
 
2014-07-29 10:49:22 PM  

Boo_Guy: They know about the soap‽  shiat now I've got to rehide it all!


Holy punctuation marks, Batman, a sighting of the rare interrobang in the wild!
 
2014-07-29 10:50:29 PM  

quatchi: Ow, my penis?

It begins.


....nah, original name is better.
 
2014-07-29 10:52:20 PM  

Kevin72: I like the guy's style. I laughed at the pelicans being in on the soap conspiracy. I should throw in a few things like that when I leave notes to the teachers that I substitute for.


"Jumped on trampoline, bruised penis" will probably get you fired and interviewed by police.

I say go for it
 
2014-07-29 10:54:12 PM  

GilRuiz1: Boo_Guy: They know about the soap‽  shiat now I've got to rehide it all!

Holy punctuation marks, Batman, a sighting of the rare interrobang in the wild!


Damn right,  I'm bring it back!
 
2014-07-29 11:04:49 PM  
My one claim to fame, I used to date a gorgeous blonde cheerleader...

Well, THAT obviously wasn't going to work for very long.

Anyway, germaine to the story, she was teaching things to a gymnastic class and came down exactly wrong on a trampoline. Shattered her hips rather expertly. Couldn't walk for a while. Last I heard she was doing well teaching Gymnastics again.
 
2014-07-29 11:27:30 PM  

with great power comes great insanity: Kevin72: I like the guy's style. I laughed at the pelicans being in on the soap conspiracy. I should throw in a few things like that when I leave notes to the teachers that I substitute for.

"Jumped on trampoline, bruised penis" will probably get you fired and interviewed by police.

I say go for it


Not that part. The pelicans and the conspiracy part.
 
2014-07-29 11:55:52 PM  

carnifex2005: Reddit leaks onto Fark again. I love it.


If you're into that kind of thing... not that there's anything wrong with that...
 
2014-07-30 12:14:50 AM  

carnifex2005: Reddit leaks onto Fark again. I love it.


"I saw this first on" people leak onto another aggregator. I love it.
 
2014-07-30 12:21:11 AM  
OMG, that's totally real.
 
2014-07-30 12:31:20 AM  
I just saw this story on CNN.
 
2014-07-30 12:56:24 AM  
It should be illegal to first jump onto a trampoline, then a bruised penis.
 
2014-07-30 06:48:07 AM  

Russ1642: How many people will this go through before they realize it's a joke?


How long before they discover that there was no neighbor house sitting, but that it was just a way for that person to write something and then tell others he got trolled.
 
2014-07-30 09:32:36 AM  
Now we know what MStD does for a living.
 
2014-07-30 09:48:59 AM  
This was something a friend of mine would do. In fact I had to ask him if this was him. Apparently he has a twin he's never known about.
 
2014-07-30 12:52:15 PM  
I have a largeish scar on my pen is.

It didn't happen on a trampoline, but she had to floss to get the skin out from between her teeth.
 
2014-07-30 01:42:10 PM  
I can accept it as truth.  Seems like something a good friend would leave another good friend after house sitting.

I found it humorous.
 
2014-07-30 02:25:34 PM  
But did they look under the back deck?
 
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