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(TMZ)   Not news: A New York man is suing Starbucks. News: Claiming the staff put heroin and Ambien in his Oprah Chai tea. Fark: six months before they even started serving Oprah Chai tea   (tmz.com) divider line 138
    More: Stupid  
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4041 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Jul 2014 at 2:12 PM (21 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



138 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-07-26 01:15:37 PM  
Well damn, all this time I've been drinking mine without drugs. I feel cheated.
 
2014-07-26 01:24:10 PM  
I'm off to Starbucks to get an Oprah Chai Tea.  Anyone else want one?
 
2014-07-26 01:27:04 PM  
Thanks, now I have a visual of Oprah doing Tai Chi.
 
2014-07-26 02:11:53 PM  

jake_lex: I'm off to Starbucks to get an Oprah Chai Tea.  Anyone else want one?


2 heroins in mine, please
 
2014-07-26 02:15:54 PM  
Oprah tea oprah chai life goes on brah......
 
2014-07-26 02:16:31 PM  
Oprah chai tea?? Oprah, as in, the talk show host woman? Has her own tea being served at Stabucks in NYC? Forgive me, as a non-New Yorker this all seems very strange.
 
2014-07-26 02:16:34 PM  
Is it made with real Oprah's?
 
2014-07-26 02:16:34 PM  
Blah people problems.
 
2014-07-26 02:17:40 PM  
It was a preemptive strike.
 
2014-07-26 02:17:45 PM  
I'm gonna guess he's representing himself. What lawyer in his right mind would take on a case so obviously based on crazy?
 
2014-07-26 02:17:55 PM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Oprah chai tea?? Oprah, as in, the talk show host woman? Has her own tea being served at Stabucks in NYC? Forgive me, as a non-New Yorker this all seems very strange.


It's not just NY.
 
2014-07-26 02:18:01 PM  
So whats the tipping protocol for a heroin and ambien chai tea?
 
2014-07-26 02:18:14 PM  

jake_lex: I'm off to Starbucks to get an Oprah Chai Tea.  Anyone else want one?


Yes please, triple shot of ambien, heroin- free, with a vicodin substitute.
 
2014-07-26 02:19:15 PM  
Wouldn't it be a Lindsay Lohan Chai Tea, then?
 
2014-07-26 02:19:52 PM  

Bathysphere: jake_lex: I'm off to Starbucks to get an Oprah Chai Tea.  Anyone else want one?

Yes please, triple shot of ambien, heroin- free, with a vicodin substitute.


Ooh, and if they have it, maybe some of that marijuana lemon pound cake I've been hearing so much about
 
2014-07-26 02:19:58 PM  

asdrabael: So whats the tipping protocol for a heroin and ambien chai tea?


Barista: 15%
Walrus: 5%
 
2014-07-26 02:20:23 PM  
Is Chai tea anything like salsa sauce?
 
2014-07-26 02:22:12 PM  
Test Market early release? I mean I could see that becoming a staple product if it tested well...
 
2014-07-26 02:22:43 PM  

Thudfark: Is Chai tea anything like salsa sauce?


It's like Panera bread
 
2014-07-26 02:23:58 PM  
He must have borrowed Obama's time machine. I mean, they probably know each other, right?
 
2014-07-26 02:23:59 PM  
Sleepy
 
2014-07-26 02:26:16 PM  
Sounds like he got off lucky. They put alien poop in mine, and called me a double plus reverse extra toggaf when I applied for a job, after exclaiming they were part of the Rhythm nation.
 
2014-07-26 02:27:26 PM  
Heroin? Oh, is that the "skinny" version I hear people order?
 
2014-07-26 02:29:43 PM  

Giltric: Oprah tea oprah chai life goes on brah......


You there! Yes, you. Please to be taking one internet for your winnings. And keep up the bad work.
 
2014-07-26 02:31:32 PM  
I had an extra hard time sleeping last night, so I remember taking an extra half Ambien and one finger of scotch.

This morning, 3 fingers of Scotch is gone and my $300 Juicer is already shipped out from Amazon.

FAN-tastic
 
2014-07-26 02:32:04 PM  
Well, Oprah is a heroin to many people. And I mean that, man.
 
2014-07-26 02:32:50 PM  

FarkingStan: Test Market early release? I mean I could see that becoming a staple product if it tested well...


would ingesting heroin do anything? I mean in the quantities ya could put in a cup of tea?
 
2014-07-26 02:34:41 PM  
Frivolous Lawsuit Saturday is here again! Woo-hoo!
 
2014-07-26 02:39:05 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-07-26 02:40:05 PM  
I would like a Starbuck's triple latte mocha java trifecta please.
 
2014-07-26 02:43:23 PM  
Well no wonder it's so damned expensive.
 
2014-07-26 02:45:11 PM  
It's adorable how you think a coffee shop that puts heroin and ambien in its drinks wouldn't lie about when a product was introduced. Just adorable.
 
2014-07-26 02:47:34 PM  
Not news: man sues business

Still not news: man with mental illness sues business
 
2014-07-26 02:47:50 PM  
I've come to expect this from Oprah products. Those broken million little pieces...
 
2014-07-26 02:51:51 PM  
Why do they even need the heroin or the ambien? Hasn't the author met a starbucks addict?
 
2014-07-26 03:00:32 PM  
1) More proof that frivolous lawsuits are alive and well;

2) I have been getting my caffeinated beverages at the wrong Starbucks
 
2014-07-26 03:03:40 PM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Oprah chai tea?? Oprah, as in, the talk show host woman? Has her own tea being served at Stabucks in NYC? Forgive me, as a non-New Yorker this all seems very strange.


Arnold Palmer ice tea? Arnold Palmer as in the golfer? Has his own ice tea being sold by a major company across the country? Forgive me, as a non-golfer this all seems very strange.

/Somebody doesn't seem to understand celebrity product branding
 
2014-07-26 03:04:13 PM  

Somaticasual: Why do they even need the heroin or the ambien? Hasn't the author met a starbucks  melted candy bar in a cup addict?



FIFY
 
2014-07-26 03:06:14 PM  
I'll take a double Ambien and double caf. I want them to fight it. Ambien is wild. My husband locks our bedroom door when I take. He doesn't like waking up in the morning to no food!
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2014-07-26 03:06:43 PM  
Um.. I know there are law people in the farker community...

Can't a judge just recognize that the case is absurd on its face and throw it out?
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2014-07-26 03:07:54 PM  

ongbok: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Oprah chai tea?? Oprah, as in, the talk show host woman? Has her own tea being served at Stabucks in NYC? Forgive me, as a non-New Yorker this all seems very strange.

Arnold Palmer ice tea? Arnold Palmer as in the golfer? Has his own ice tea being sold by a major company across the country? Forgive me, as a non-golfer this all seems very strange.

/Somebody doesn't seem to understand celebrity product branding


Actually the lemonade and iced tea half and half is good stuff.  Go to any gas station... they probably have it.
 
2014-07-26 03:07:59 PM  
A serious question. Isn't "Chai" actually just means "Tea"? Oprah Tea Tea? (not going to even start on "Oprah" being there)
 
2014-07-26 03:09:15 PM  

BigLuca: I had an extra hard time sleeping last night, so I remember taking an extra half Ambien and one finger of scotch.

This morning, 3 fingers of Scotch is gone and my $300 Juicer is already shipped out from Amazon.

FAN-tastic


Ha! In have three different tablets on the way because of last night's bourbon!
 
2014-07-26 03:10:50 PM  

ongbok: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Oprah chai tea?? Oprah, as in, the talk show host woman? Has her own tea being served at Stabucks in NYC? Forgive me, as a non-New Yorker this all seems very strange.

Arnold Palmer ice tea? Arnold Palmer as in the golfer? Has his own ice tea being sold by a major company across the country? Forgive me, as a non-golfer this all seems very strange.

/Somebody doesn't seem to understand celebrity product branding


I was blown away by the "Gene Simmons Communion Wafers" they use at our church.
 
2014-07-26 03:13:01 PM  

Grahor: A serious question. Isn't "Chai" actually just means "Tea"? Oprah Tea Tea? (not going to even start on "Oprah" being there)


Oprah spelled backwards is Harpo, who was one of the Marx brothers along with Groucho and Karlo.  So really when you ask for an Oprah chai tea, you're saying "I'd like a Marxist utopia bowl of duck soup tea tea, Dr. Phil."
 
2014-07-26 03:13:55 PM  
I've never had a Starbuck's coffee, heroin or Ambien but if I were to cash in my 401k to buy a cup of Starbucks, I'd go with the heroin. I've heard some farked up shiat about Ambien.
 
2014-07-26 03:16:31 PM  
What the fark is Oprah Chai tea?
 
2014-07-26 03:18:15 PM  

katerbug72: What the fark is Oprah Chai tea?


One cup and you gain 80 pounds...
 
2014-07-26 03:18:22 PM  

Mugato: I've never had a Starbuck's coffee, heroin or Ambien but if I were to cash in my 401k to buy a cup of Starbucks, I'd go with the heroin. I've heard some farked up shiat about Ambien.


I think that's a safe bet. Ambien is more addictive!
 
2014-07-26 03:18:43 PM  
Let's you know that Starbucks uses quality heroin in their brews.
 
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