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(Wimp)   Your dog may want steak, but what about the strays?   (wimp.com) divider line 29
    More: Spiffy  
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2182 clicks; posted to Video » on 25 Jul 2014 at 1:41 PM (21 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



29 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-07-25 10:12:14 AM  
My dog will eat them too, given the chance.
 
2014-07-25 10:19:17 AM  
In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.
 
2014-07-25 10:46:52 AM  

Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.


Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.
 
2014-07-25 12:02:20 PM  

Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.


This device is a much better idea. If we attract the strays into a small area it will be easier to catch them. Then we can murder them and process them into dog food to refill the machine. Stray problem solved.
 
2014-07-25 01:33:06 PM  

johnsoninca: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

This device is a much better idea. If we attract the strays into a small area it will be easier to catch them. Then we can murder them and process them into dog food to refill the machine. Stray problem solved.


Better idea:  we come up with a compound that explodes when it comes into contact with canine digestive juices.  Then, we plant it leftover meat and leave it lying around in areas inhabited by stray dogs.  Some of the dogs will take the bait, and then explode.  Then other strays will come along and eat their carcasses, and then *THEY* will explode.  You'd probably get like 3 or 4 iterations before the compound was too diluted to have any effect.
 
2014-07-25 01:50:38 PM  
All fine and dandy until somebody pours this into it:

img2u.info
 
2014-07-25 02:06:17 PM  
Wow, I sure stepped in something when I entered this thread.

This is a waste of space.

Yes, this device will attract strays, when there are no people and tame dogs around.  I say that they stake out the bait, then round 'em up, spay & neuter, chip and inoculate, and send for adoption.  Or euthanize, as appropriate.

Then, there are feral dogs.  They cannot be rehabilitated.  And pit bulls.  Them, too.  Goodnight, take the little shot.  Good doggie, live long in Heaven.

/I couldn't DRAG my dachshund away from an auto-feed machine.
 
2014-07-25 02:09:03 PM  
So it recycles the plastic bottles into dog food?  That *is* some genius chemistry.
 
2014-07-25 02:10:06 PM  
How about something like a canine version of the big-ass meat grinder in that Pink Floyd video?
 
2014-07-25 02:13:43 PM  

LesserEvil: All fine and dandy until somebody pours this into it:

[img2u.info image 210x335]


forums.watchuseek.com
Preferably Prestone. No, no--make that Quaker State.
 
Bf+
2014-07-25 02:29:28 PM  

Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.


These handouts merely foster a culture of dependance among inner-city dogs.  It is easier to fall back on the reliance of such entitlements than to bother getting a job.  Next thing you know, these parasites will be using those bottles to buy lottery tickets, cigarettes, and lobsters.  Why should my Hard-Earned American Taxpayer Dollars™  be used... (and so on)
 
2014-07-25 02:32:48 PM  

LesserEvil: All fine and dandy until somebody pours this into it:

[img2u.info image 210x335]


Aaauuuggghh!  So enticing for a dawg, yet so agonizing lethal.
 
2014-07-25 02:43:40 PM  
WOW. This thread got dark real quick, even for Fark.
 
2014-07-25 02:49:35 PM  

Kimyo: WOW. This thread got dark real quick, even for Fark.


I love (and have) a juvenile sense of humor, but cruelty-to-animal jokes are downright infantile.
 
2014-07-25 02:54:45 PM  

dittybopper: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.


Well, half solved, anyway.
 
2014-07-25 02:56:30 PM  

GnomePaladin: Kimyo: WOW. This thread got dark real quick, even for Fark.

I love (and have) a juvenile sense of humor, but cruelty-to-animal jokes are downright infantile.


I expected it to get to this level, but not this quickly.
 
2014-07-25 03:13:33 PM  

Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.


That's been done before.

Article from 2013: http://daliamortada.com/2013/10/08/istanbuls-forgotten-dogs-struggle- f or-survival/

So when Turkey's Ministry of Forestry and Water drafted a law that would send city dogs to "wildlife parks" on city outskirts, Senpolat and thousands of animal rights activists were outraged. The law was set aside because of broad opposition.

Revisiting history
Opponents of the draft law say they are reminded of a similar move in 1910. In an effort to "westernize" the city just before the fall of the Ottoman Empire, Sultan Mehmed V ordered tens of thousands stray dogs from Istanbul to be sent to a nearby island.

The island did not have food or water for the dogs. "Most of the animals were just eating each other," Senpolat recounts. According to records, residents on Istanbul's mainland could hear the dogs howl in agony from starvation. "
 
2014-07-25 03:21:29 PM  

MooseBayou: /I couldn't DRAG my dachshund away from an auto-feed machine.


It's a proven fact that Dachshunds will eat until they pop.
 
2014-07-25 03:29:45 PM  

dittybopper: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.


We should try that with poor people.
www.parallax-corp.com
 
2014-07-25 03:38:09 PM  

rlandrum: dittybopper: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.

Well, half solved, anyway.


See, here's the cool thing:  Next iteration halves the number of dogs yet again.  And the subsequent ones do the same.  So like strays would have a half-life of, what, a few days to a week?

Call it a week, and say you've got 10,000 strays.  This is how it would break down:

Week 1: 10,000
Week 2:  5,000
Week 3:  2,500
Week 4:  1,250
Week 5:    625
Week 6:    312
Week 7:    156
Week 8:     78
Week 9:     39
Week 10:    19
Week 11:     9
Week 12:     4
Week 13:     2
Week 14:     1


At the end of just over 3 months, not only will you have gotten rid of your stray problem, but you have a very well fed dog at the end.

SCIENCE!
 
2014-07-25 03:40:34 PM  

lasercannon: dittybopper: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.

We should try that with poor people.
[www.parallax-corp.com image 577x783]


See, now, I realize you just ripped that off the intarwebs, so this isn't a criticism of you, but a clever photoshopper would have also 'shooped the ingredient list to either include plankton, or people.
 
2014-07-25 07:42:36 PM  

dittybopper: johnsoninca: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

This device is a much better idea. If we attract the strays into a small area it will be easier to catch them. Then we can murder them and process them into dog food to refill the machine. Stray problem solved.

Better idea:  we come up with a compound that explodes when it comes into contact with canine digestive juices.  Then, we plant it leftover meat and leave it lying around in areas inhabited by stray dogs.  Some of the dogs will take the bait, and then explode.  Then other strays will come along and eat their carcasses, and then *THEY* will explode.  You'd probably get like 3 or 4 iterations before the compound was too diluted to have any effect.


You are an asshole.
 
2014-07-25 08:35:11 PM  
Why not design it so the dogs can drop off the can or bottle into the slot and then receive the food?  Then the dogs will be cleaning up the park for the humans.

shiat, let's set up a dog pooping station that dispenses food for the puppies while we're at it.
 
2014-07-25 09:31:03 PM  

jimpoz: LesserEvil:
Preferably Prestone. No, no--make that Quaker State.


When you Peak, you win!
performancecarmagazine.s3.amazonaws.com
 
2014-07-25 09:42:20 PM  
came to support Soylent K9
 
2014-07-25 10:50:21 PM  

Beerguy: It's a proven fact that Dachshunds will eat until they pop.


wrong sir.. One of my dachshunds has self control.  The other will eat till he pukes (and yes I've done that experiement).  I let him have at a dog version birthday cake, all he wanted to eat.. and kept eating, and then it all came up.  At least now I know he has a self regulating stomach.
 
2014-07-26 12:30:30 AM  

Rigger1955: dittybopper: johnsoninca: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

This device is a much better idea. If we attract the strays into a small area it will be easier to catch them. Then we can murder them and process them into dog food to refill the machine. Stray problem solved.

Better idea:  we come up with a compound that explodes when it comes into contact with canine digestive juices.  Then, we plant it leftover meat and leave it lying around in areas inhabited by stray dogs.  Some of the dogs will take the bait, and then explode.  Then other strays will come along and eat their carcasses, and then *THEY* will explode.  You'd probably get like 3 or 4 iterations before the compound was too diluted to have any effect.

You are an asshole.


Lighten up, Francis.
 
2014-07-26 12:14:52 PM  

dittybopper: rlandrum: dittybopper: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.

Well, half solved, anyway.

See, here's the cool thing:  Next iteration halves the number of dogs yet again.  And the subsequent ones do the same.  So like strays would have a half-life of, what, a few days to a week?

Call it a week, and say you've got 10,000 strays.  This is how it would break down:

Week 1: 10,000
Week 2:  5,000
Week 3:  2,500
Week 4:  1,250
Week 5:    625
Week 6:    312
Week 7:    156
Week 8:     78
Week 9:     39
Week 10:    19
Week 11:     9
Week 12:     4
Week 13:     2
Week 14:     1

At the end of just over 3 months, not only will you have gotten rid of your stray problem, but you have a very well fed dog at the end.

SCIENCE!


That's not science, that's arithmetic.
 
2014-07-26 11:11:03 PM  

pup.socket: dittybopper: rlandrum: dittybopper: Saborlas: In before some sociopath advocates solving the problem via letting all the dogs starve to death.

Feed half the strays to the other half.  Problem solved.

Well, half solved, anyway.

See, here's the cool thing:  Next iteration halves the number of dogs yet again.  And the subsequent ones do the same.  So like strays would have a half-life of, what, a few days to a week?

Call it a week, and say you've got 10,000 strays.  This is how it would break down:

Week 1: 10,000
Week 2:  5,000
Week 3:  2,500
Week 4:  1,250
Week 5:    625
Week 6:    312
Week 7:    156
Week 8:     78
Week 9:     39
Week 10:    19
Week 11:     9
Week 12:     4
Week 13:     2
Week 14:     1

At the end of just over 3 months, not only will you have gotten rid of your stray problem, but you have a very well fed dog at the end.

SCIENCE!

That's not science, that's arithmetic.


It's calculating the length of time it would take to get down from 10,000 soylent strays down to 1 stray using a half-life of 1 week.  It's no different than dating a piece of organic material through C14 to C12 ratios.
 
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